I’ve been busy. Go Faster.”
“I am!”
“A turtle could outrun you.”
Jenn gritted her teeth and pedaled as fast as she could go, glaring at him the entire time. Sweat covered her body, her lungs burned with the effort of keeping up the pace and still she pedaled. She hated her relationship with Nick. He built her up during her workout sessions, told her she could do it, she was doing great. But bring up anything to do with Matt’s education and the barriers came up, as if it was a personal affront to him that Matt struggled. As if it was his fault?
But that was ridiculous. Children struggled in school all the time. They had some subjects they did better in than others. But what about her arrangements with Nick? In public he was usually attentive and easygoing as a guy friend should be, but whenever they were alone, there was an unbreachable wall between them. Why did he run so hot and cold?
“All I’m saying…” pant “…is that Matt needs you. He needs to know…that reading and math…are important.” She closed her eyes briefly and fought the frustration rolling around inside her. Combined with her hungry state, her head pounded. “I didn’t say…anything. When you took my idea for the concert. And turned it. From an incentive to a punishment.”
“Here we go.”
“If he doesn’t—Oh, good grief! Do well on. His tests. But what you do, how you behave, what Matt sees in you. Influences him. And if. You’re too busy. Too whatever—” she gulped in air “—to help him with this, or by letting him see you reading some yourself.”
“This isn’t about me.”
“Then who? What do you think. He thinks? He has to consider himself. And reading. Worth the effort.”
“You’re one to talk about thinking something is worth the effort.”
She opened her burning eyes wide to discover Nick now stood with his hands on the lower handle curve of the bike, his gaze too close, too knowing. Jenn shook her head. “This isn’t. About me. Either.”
“Matt’s worth it. We both agree on that. But you? I don’t know about that. I think so, but why do you want to lose weight?”
Jenn struggled to draw in more air. Oh, her legs burned! “You know. Why. The trip.”
“But it can’t be just the trip. If it’s just the trip, then once the trip is over so is your drive to succeed. Is that what you want?” “No.”
“Then why are you doing this? Why are you here? Don’t slow down, keep pedaling. Faster.”
“Oh, help me.” Her heart pounded in her chest and she saw Nick as the drill sergeant he’d claimed to be. “Because I want to—” She panted. Her lungs were on fire. Thank goodness the gym was virtually empty at this time of day, otherwise she was sure everyone would be watching.
“Want to what? What?”
“Feel better. And…lose weight!”
“Why?”
For the same reason she wanted to prove to Matt he could read. It was necessary. It was healthy. It was a good thing. But the truth was most of all she wanted to be skinny, and she knew if she said that Nick would jump on the comment and tear her to shreds in the mood he was in. “To be. Healthy.”
“Why?”
What was with him?
“Why?”
Nick lowered his head until he was nose-to-nose with her, those amazing eyes of his squinting into hers. With every pedal and huff she felt weaker, more vulnerable, and she knew he saw it.
“You want Matt to know a good education is worth it. But what about you? Is your body worth being treated with respect? Is your health and well-being worth being kind to yourself? Are you worth it?”
“Yes.” It was a weak, lackluster response and she knew it. The desperate bid made that much worse because she couldn’t maintain eye contact.
“What was that? Say I’m worth it. Don’t stop. Don’t slow down, keep pushing.”
“You’re pushing. Me. Because you’re mad. About what I said. Punishing. Me. Why?”
“You can’t say it. Why are you slowing down? Don’t stop.”
“I’m tired.” Sick and tired of not being who she wanted to be.
“Trainers push. It’s what we do. Say it and you can stop. Say it, Jenn. I’m worth it. Three little words.”
“I. Hate. You.”
He grinned. “I know. But say it anyway. I’m worth it.”
A rough sound caught her by surprise and horrified her because it was almost a sob. Almost. She clamped her mouth shut and prayed hard. What was the problem? Three little words, like he said. Why couldn’t she say them? And to say that she hated him? She pedaled hard, but she wasn’t going anywhere near as fast as she had been. Why wouldn’t he leave her alone?
“It’s hard, isn’t it? After people say the things they do to help us try harder, it’s almost impossible to believe we’re worth anything. I know, sweetheart. I know exactly what that’s like.”
“How?” Maybe if he could trust her enough to tell her how he knew, maybe then…
“I just do.”
Their eyes locked and she saw the same hurt, the same pain in him that she felt, and she knew his words were true. On this, they connected. “I’m—” Her head spun faster than the wheel she pedaled, pounding with the rhythm of her whirling feet. She felt so weak and shaky and dizzy, that she might—
“Jenn? Jenn!”
She didn’t pass out, but she came close to it. One minute she was on the bike and the next she was in Nick’s arms, everything swirling as he lifted her off and carried her into his office.
“Put…put me down.”
“Hold still. Stop squirming. Did you follow the schedule?”
She nodded weakly.
“Don’t lie to me.” Nick seated himself on the couch with her sprawled across his lap.
Was he trembling—or was she? She tried to move herself off his hard thighs, but she couldn’t budge even though he barely restrained her. She was so weak.
“Jenn? Sweetheart, I’m sorry for pushing you this hard.” His lips brushed her forehead, her eyebrow. “Hear me? Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I’m in a lousy mood and I took it out on you.”
“I’m okay.” Maybe if she said it enough, her body would believe it. Why couldn’t she stop shaking?
“Did you eat?”
She sighed, recognizing his tone. How can he be so different? Yelling at her one minute about Matt and working out, and the next minute being so caring? Concerned? His about-faces made her head spin almost as much as the lack of food. “I’m fine.”
“That’s a no.”
“The only way I’m going to fit into my dress is if I lose weight quickly.”
His arms tightened around her. “Where do you think the energy to work out and burn calories comes from?”
He growled the words, and the sound of his heart was rapid in her ears. Angry on Nick looked…intense.
Intensely delicious.
Where did that come from? That’s no way to think about a friend. “I’ll, um, eat when we’re done.”
“We’re done.”
“I barely did anything today. I’m fine.”
“We’re done,” he repeated. “Don’t argue with me. I don’t want you skipping meals. All that does is shift your body into survival mode, so that it stores everything you do eat.” He shook her gently. “You nearly passed out on me.”
“But I didn’t.” She lifted a hand and rubbed her eyes. How embarrassing! “How many people saw me?”
Nick’s mouth tightened. “That’s not important.”
“It is to me. I can’t believe you carried me in here. I’m too big. Why isn’t it working? It’s been weeks and I’ve barely lost anything. Just a couple pounds. How come the stupid scales aren’t moving faster, when all I’m doing is eating grass and exercising?”
He squeezed her to gain her full attention. “Listen to me and listen good. You are not to skip another meal. You do what I say and you’ll lose the weight, but regardless of what the scales say, this isn’t worth doing at all if you end up making yourself sick. Do you hear me? Throw away the scales.”
She stared into Nick’s eyes and realized with a start that she’d scared him. His pulse beat rapidly in his throat and his gaze was…Caring? For all his bluster, he did care. It was right there for her to see and she stopped being upset with him. “I don’t want to fight with you. Please, let me up.”
A knock sounded at the door, then a man with dark hair and striking features stepped inside. His forehead wrinkled when he took in the sight of Jenn on Nick’s lap. She tried to scoot off, but once again Nick stopped her.
“She okay?”
“She didn’t eat.” Once again he growled out the words. Coming from such a big man she should’ve been highly intimidated, but having spent nearly every day either in Nick’s company or his son’s, she now understood that Nick’s bark was way worse than his bite. She hoped.
“I figured it might be something like that. I brought you some orange juice and crackers.” He opened the juice before handing it to Jenn. “Drink up. It’ll help bring your blood sugar back up.”
She bit her lip and stared at the information block on the back of the bottle. “It’s got a lot of sugar in it.”
Nick grimaced. “I’ve created a monster. Drink the juice.”
“There’s no need to bite my head off.” She rubbed her temple, feeling sluggish and shaky and moody. Her head hurt, too, and the room was wobbling in front of her, everything off-kilter. She took a small sip, sliding the man who’d brought the juice a glare when he took her hand and pressed his fingers to her wrist.
“More,” Nick said. “Doctor’s orders.”
“You’re not a doctor.”
“But I am.” The man in front of them grinned. “Don’t let the workout gear fool you. Drink it all. And since Nick has yet to introduce us, I’ll introduce myself. Ethan Tulane, Nick’s brother.”
She stared at him, suddenly able to see the connection. “I should’ve known.”
“What?” they asked simultaneously.
Practically sandwiched between them, she couldn’t miss the male energy. They were both gorgeous, and they both stared down at her as if they’d actually do her bidding if she just snapped her fingers. And they asked what? “Nothing. I’m—”
“Jennifer Rose,” Nick added grudgingly.
“Nice to meet you, Jennifer Rose.”
“Oh, it’s…it’s just Jennifer or Jenn. Rose is my last name, not my middle. Nick calls me that sometimes. Mostly when I irritate him.”
That statement earned her a glare, but Nick made no move to shove her off his lap or to offer any explanations as to why she was still there. And apparently she wasn’t the only one to think it strange because Ethan nodded toward the empty space beside them. “Would you be more comfortable lying down?”
“She’s fine.”
Amusement sparkled in Ethan’s gaze. “I see. Well, she’s obviously in good hands so I’ll leave you to give her a lecture—or mouth-to-mouth.”
She gasped sharply. “I don’t need a lecture. And we’re just friends.”
“Shut the door on your way out.”
Jenn twisted her head around to glare at Nick. “That’s rude,” she informed him in a stage whisper.
Ethan laughed harder at Jenn’s bid for manners. “See you around, little brother. Don’t be such a stranger. Jennifer, it’s nice to meet you. Don’t worry about Nick’s grumbling. Tulanes have a tendency to be possessive, and Nick never did play well with others.” He winked at her before smirking at his brother. “Don’t forget that lecture.”
Ethan Tulane was gone in an instant, the door closing softly behind him with a snick of sound.
Jenn tried hard to ignore the way it felt to be surrounded by Nick. On his lap, in his arms. “Why did you do that?”
“Do what?”
“Act so…so whatever.” Aware of his frowning displeasure, she took another nervous sip of juice to give herself something to do. Was it possible? They spent a lot of time together and she’d continually warned herself not to make more of the situation with Nick than there was, but…She needed air, time to think. Sitting on Nick’s lap like that was making her lose her mind. “Let me up.”
“No. Ethan isn’t the guy for you.”
“Why not? He’s a doctor and handsome and you should’ve been nicer to your brother.” She rolled her eyes, and regretted it when the move made her head pound harder. “Ow.” Fingers to her eyebrow, she rubbed. “And I don’t need a lecture. You’re just trying to change the subject from the fact that you know I’m right and you need to spend some time with your son, reading with him.”
“Drop it while you have my sympathy after nearly giving me a heart attack. And listen up. Ethan hooks up with women who know the score. He’s all about casual relationships and two-to-screw dates. That’s it.”
“Two-to-screw?”
“Two dates, a night in bed and he’s done.”
She pondered that for a long moment, whatever it took to keep from looking directly at Nick. “What makes you think I can’t do casual?”
His entire body tensed and hardened beneath her. “You been with anyone since Dixon?”
Of all the—“That’s none of your business.”
“No, that says it all. Drink some more.” He lifted the bottle and pressed it to her lips.
Jenn swallowed to keep from having the orange juice all over her shirt. “Is that really why?” A horrible thought occurred. “Oh, no.”
“What?”
She smoothed the hair that had escaped its band, and wiped the cool sweat from her cheek and forehead. Had her mascara smeared? She couldn’t come work out without at least a little makeup on. She’d scare the guys away for sure then. “I’m a wreck. That’s it, isn’t it? I’m a wreck and too big, and he’s only into skinny, little—”
“Shut up.”
She gaped at him. “Don’t tell me to shut up.”
“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the way you look.”
“Yeah, right.”
“You don’t believe me?”
“Of course I don’t,” she stated bluntly. “I look like a big, sweaty blob.”
He took the juice from her hand.
“What are you doing?”
Nick set the juice bottle aside and slid his hand along her jaw, palmed her face and stared into her eyes, as if he wanted to look into her soul. But that couldn’t be right, because how silly was that? It was her low blood sugar. She couldn’t think straight. Nick liked women who resembled Ms. Perky Boobs, not an overly plump—
“Following doctor’s orders by learning to play well with you. Look at me.” He waited for her to make eye contact. “Jennifer Rose, you don’t look like a blob.”
That said, Nick lowered his head, oh, so slowly toward her. His gaze dropped to her mouth along the way and she had the urge to wet her lips. Her heart galloped in her chest, an overweight racehorse struggling to keep up with the sleek thoroughbreds way ahead of her, and she didn’t move. The moment was so surreal she was afraid to breathe, do anything, for fear of screwing it up. Was he really going to kiss her?
The door opened abruptly, this time without a warning knock, and an older woman took two steps inside before coming to a halt. Nick groaned and buried his face in her neck so he didn’t see the amusement and curiosity lighting the woman’s wrinkled features.
“Go away, Ethan.”
The woman chuckled and Nick tensed, his entire body going rigid beneath her once more.
The elderly woman smiled at her, the look positively beaming. “Well, hello, dear. I see Marguerite Bumgarner was right. I’m Rosetta, Nick’s grandmother. And you are…?”
“Going to die of embarrassment,” she whispered.
OF ALL THE MEMBERS of his family who got on his nerves or drove him crazy, Gram wasn’t usually one of them. Until today. What was he thinking? What had he been about to do? He had as much chance of getting a diploma as Jenn did of climbing atop his desk right then and dancing for them. “Gram, now’s not a good time. Can’t it wait?”
His grandmother didn’t so much as blink. No, she smiled expectantly at Jenn and ignored him entirely. He knew that look and bit back another groan.
“Don’t be embarrassed, dear. Not at all. I know very well how one can get carried away by passion. Why, all Nick’s grandfather had to do was—”
“Gram. Did you need something?”
“An introduction would be nice. Where are your manners, dear?”
“Gram, Jennifer Rose. Jenn, my grandmother.”
“A pleasure. Have we met before? You look familiar, dear.”
“I’m not sure. I’m a teacher at the elementary.”
“Ah, that’s it. You bring your students to The Village to sing for us.”
Jenn nodded at the mention of the assisted-living facility and the two chatted about the previous year’s program.
Nick had hoped to avoid meeting up with Gram because of the guilt trip he knew he’d receive about the upcoming family gatherings. It had been happening a lot lately. His brother Garret would call and ask him to do something first. After Nick turned him down, his mother’s invitation would come next. And when that didn’t work, Mom called in reinforcements in the form of Gram, knowing that Nick couldn’t tell his grandmother no very often. If at all.
“Um…I feel a lot better now, Nick. Why don’t I leave you two to talk?”
“Don’t be silly, dear. Of course you can stay.”
His gut clenched. “Gram—”
“Mrs. Tulane—”
“Rosetta, dear.” Triumph glowed on Gram’s face. “Or Gram,” she added, her purpose clear.
“Gram.”
Jenn’s face pinkened. “Rosetta, please don’t misunderstand what you s-saw. Nick and I are just friends. I felt dizzy in the weight room and he helped me.” She elbowed him in the ribs then shoved herself off his lap and onto the couch before attempting to scramble to her feet. Moving so quickly must have sent her head spinning because she closed her eyes briefly before latching on to the back of the nearest chair.
Nick jumped up and steadied her with a grip on her shoulders. When she regained some of her color, he reluctantly let go.
“Well, I should hope so. On both counts. Friendship is a necessary aspect in a relationship, otherwise they never last. And men are supposed to be gentlemen and help those in need. But when I walked in…” Gram turned her gaze on him. “Have you invited Jennifer to the wedding festivities?”
That brought Jennifer’s head up once more. “Wedding? Oh, I couldn’t possibly impo—”
“I’m not going.” The blunt response slipped out before Nick could stop it, earning Jenn’s wide-eyed disbelief and his grandmother’s down-the-nose glare of disapproval.
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t want to fight with you, Gram.”
“Then don’t. You’d miss your brother’s wedding—the first wedding in the family? Matt is in the ceremony. If for no other reason, you should be attending the events because of that. And what about tonight? You’ll be at the rehearsal dinner, won’t you?”
He locked his jaw.
“Nicholas?”
Gram stared at him. Jenn, too. His hands fisted. The last thing he wanted to do was go a round with either one of them—or go to the rehearsal dinner. But he could feel the tide turning, the sand shifting beneath his feet. He knew it was expected, that he’d cause a whole other battle if he skipped it, and he was outnumbered but…
“I see.”
How was it possible to put so much impact and disapproval in two little words? “It’s just a dinner. Look, I’ll come to the wedding. Okay? I’ll be there for the ceremony. That’s the important thing.” He could drop Matt off tomorrow afternoon for all the photos, leave and go to work. Then show up late, just before the ceremony began, and take off as soon as it was over. That counted as being there and no one would even notice if he wasn’t at the reception. He’d cause more of a stir if he actually showed up. Didn’t they get that?
“Of course it’s important, but that’s not good enough.”
Gram’s voice shook slightly. Was she that upset about this?
“Nicholas Tulane, you are a member of the family whether you acknowledge us or not.”
Awww, crap. “Gram, it’s not like that and you know it.”
“Jennifer, it was nice to meet you.”
“Likewise.” Jennifer glanced at him, her expression urging him to speak up and say something. To agree to go.
He didn’t.
Gram’s mouth was a hard, flat line, disappointment clouding her eyes. He and Luke had inherited their blue eyes from her, but right now it was kind of eerie having her look at him like that. Shaking her head, Gram turned to leave without giving him a hug, something she’d done from the time he was born. No one left her presence without a hug.
“Jennifer, dear, it was good to meet you.” Gram stepped forward and hugged Jenn close. “Come see me sometime. I’d love to chat with you.”
“Oh, um, sure.”
Gram dipped her head. “Nick.”
“Gram…”
The door shut behind her. Nick waited for her to burst back into the room with a list of demands, but seconds passed and there was no sign of her.
“I cannot believe you did that! She’s your grandmother and she only wants you to come to rehearsal dinner. What’s the big deal?”
Given Jenn’s uncompromising tone, he chose his words carefully. “The big deal is none of your business.” Nick walked toward her slowly, intending to round the desk and seat himself behind it, but along the way he was aware that Jennifer inched backward with every step he took and that just made him angrier. She knew he’d been about to kiss her. There was no mistaking his intent. Obviously that wasn’t what she wanted. “The deal is that if I don’t want to go to my brother’s wedding, I don’t have to go.”
“Did you see her face? Nick, she loves you so much! Why not go to the dinner?”