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Lydia could tell that Maureen was anything but fine. Yet the woman was her employer and Lydia had no business delving into her personal affairs. If anything, Lydia would like to cry herself, but she did her best to appear poised. She knew all too well what it was like to wear a fake mask of happiness when in truth she felt miserable inside. Not that it wasn’t her own fault. Her parents’ hearts would be broken if they knew of her plans to leave the church. Even her boyfriend, Jonathan, knew nothing of it. He would have tried to talk her out of leaving with Maureen Cook to come here. As far as he knew, Lydia was busy taking care of Amanda in New Jersey. Which reminded her, she had promised to write him a letter and had yet to send even a postcard. She was hoping that if she just disappeared into thin air, he would get the picture. She didn’t think she loved him anymore nor did she wish to marry him and live the Amish life. She had bigger plans for herself. Of getting her GED and then attending college and studying to be a teacher.
What was she talking about? She could not afford college tuition and probably wasn’t smart enough to attend one. And she could be thrown in jail at any moment. She had stolen every piece of clothing that she was wearing. Even her shoes.
Ach, what had she been thinking? She’d been caught mid-theft. Only the one time. She should have been patient and waited for her first paycheck. Greediness had seized her as if Satan himself had made her do it. And the owner of the shop had blackmailed her ever since. “Or you could step into the backroom with me,” the owner, a lustful fifty-year-old man, had suggested. He’d leered at her in a way that said it all. A disgusting thought as far as Lydia was concerned. He had threatened to report her shoplifting to the police and press charges if she didn’t pay a monthly fee. These would be the most expensive shoes she’d ever bought. If she could reverse the hands of time, she would have never stolen them. But she’d found that’s not how life worked. How would she ever break free of the cycle?
She figured Denny might understand her predicament. But not Maureen, her employer, the woman who paid her good money that kept her out of jail.
A thought spread its wings in her mind. Lydia was tempted to stay in Scotland if they’d have her. She might never go home. She might land a job in this very hotel. Or marry someone cute. Like Alec, if he found her attractive.