CHAPTER THIRTEEN

 

 

- Bren

How can this have gone so bad so quickly? Hannah wants to go home? Doesn’t she realize that I will never let her go?

“No.” Releasing the arms of the chair, I pull my lengthening nails from the fabric and settle them lightly onto my knees. This is another thing that I’ve only ever read about. Mating fever. Discussed in hushed tones as a curse, it’s when the mate bond is threatened and control is lost.

“No, you won’t take me home or no, your promised won’t mind you bringing back a girlfriend?”

What is she talking about? She is not something casual like a friend. We will always belong together. “No, you cannot go back to your home world. Earth is not a choice for you.”

I can tell she is angry, and tears have begun to leak down her cheeks at my words too. Her confusion and anger is clear through our bond. It makes me hurt to feel how I have made her feel. My anger fades and I move across the space between us to pull her into my arms.

“No! No, no!” Her words are emphasized by pounding on my chest as she bursts into tears.

Standing, she stumbles back and trips on the sheet she has wound around her body. Catching her, I hold her until her fluttering hands grab my forearms to stabilize herself. “You can’t do this!” She pushes herself away from me again and leans against the washroom door frame. “I can’t be around you and not want you. I don’t know why you did this to us! We could’ve been good friends without sex. Now how can I deal with you?”

Tears are streaming down her face and I can barely understand her words. The pain through our shared bond is strong and I know she is truly hurting. I understand that I should have shared more of my past and commitments at my home world, but I thought we would have time.

Now even that has been taken from us. But nothing is changing and I will just have to convince her of that. She is mine.

“You will get over this in time.” Reaching for her again, when she strikes my chest, I pull her into me, trapping her arms. She struggles as I lift her and move us towards the bed.

“No Bren. No.” Her words dissolve into tears as I lay her down.

She immediately rolls away from me, giving me her back.

Ignoring her flinch as I touch her, I trace her mating mark lines on her upper back, watching the colors dance under my fingers. Her tears and anguish sit heavy in my chest as she struggles to regain control.

It takes a while before she talks to me again. But I can wait. I’ll wait for her for eternity. It feels like I already have.

“I hate how good that feels.” The dull throb in my chest lets me know she is speaking from a place of pain.

“Everything between us will always feel good.” The words tumble from my mouth without thinking. In hindsight, they aren’t the most insightful.

“That is hard to believe Bren. I don’t feel good right now. I just want to go home.”

Of course she says the one thing I can never give her. I’m sure I would never be welcome in her homeland. Even if Earth wasn’t in the Ashen’s zone, humans on Earth don’t know of other species and it will be a long time before they accept them.

“We will always be together. It will work out. It has to.” The platitudes you feed a child spill from me, but I can’t help feeling like I will do whatever it takes to keep her. Is it possible she doesn’t feel the same?

“Wouldn’t you miss me if you went home?” I hold my breath while I wait for her response, straining to understand what I feel from our bond too.

“Sure.” She looks over her shoulder at me seriously. “But I’m going to be in even more pain now. I’ll have to see you and miss you. Right? It’s not like you broke off the big ceremony she was discussing. Everything is still on, right? Where does that leave me?”

What is she thinking?

The door rings and I realize that our meal has arrived.

“Stay here.” Pulling another sheet from under the bed, I cover her and open the door for the delivery.