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COLIN
I stared at the email Jaxon sent me, a grin growing despite my amused disgust. He didn’t stop. He just didn’t stop. Part of that was comforting. Another part I found reassuring was that he wasn’t in the office across the hall from me, ready to pounce on anything I might accidentally say.
Sleep had eluded me the last few nights. For the first time in almost twelve years, it didn’t have to do with Mathias and his death. The way I’d talked to Jaxon had been uncalled for and unnecessary. He was being honest with me. I could be honest without being cruel and yet I hadn’t. I’d set out to hurt him and as I’d lain in bed, I couldn’t help going over and over every mean word I’d said and what I could have said differently.
His email’s teasing tone made me feel a little better, but I still hadn’t apologized for the way I’d acted. Could I bring myself to do it? Or was I just encouraging him to pursue me when I sincerely wasn’t interested?
Rubbing my hand down my face, I decided that being kind had everything to do with being a decent person and nothing to do with protecting one’s heart. He didn’t deserve it and I wasn’t a cruel person.
I leaned forward, grinning as I typed my reply.
I’ll make sure Carlisle copies you on any information you might need.
Also, ClickandWed can match you to anyone who is in the system, but only if you’re compatible by a very high margin. If that doesn’t happen when you sign up, your profile will be matched as soon as your match does join the program.
I’ve never signed up. Plus, I don’t think you’d be matched to a Podunk business(wo)man. Do you? ☺
On a side note, I do apologize for the way I treated you. It was unlike me and not what you deserved.
C.
P.S. You’re going to miss the boating season here.
What guy didn’t love boats? I couldn’t help adding that last part. Finding out Jaxon had left after renting out the office had been surreal. He’d left so fast and without a goodbye. The discovery had surprised me and I hadn’t been expecting it when he’d rented out the space just the week before.
Of course, I knew I had hurt him. I didn’t want to hurt the man. He was charming and willing to help out others. He pursued me with gentlemanly forthrightness which I appreciated, but wouldn’t go for. I didn’t need to mention that his magnetism or the determined way he sought me even after I’d said no were distracting.
After the confrontation in his offices, I’d stewed about it for quite a while, then had swallowed my pride and gone to his offices to see if he’d want to go for a platonic dinner around the corner, but he’d been gone. I just wanted to apologize for how I’d treated him and the things I’d said.
When I returned to my own offices, I asked Carlisle if he knew where Jaxon had gone and he’d looked at me as if I were crazy. “He left this afternoon. He left instructions, but the offices are for us to use for the next few months.”
The lack of sleep had increased and my weekend had been horrific. Had I driven him away? While I’d wanted him to stop chasing me romantically, I hadn’t wanted him to leave. I was starting to enjoy the man as a friend, albeit a bratty one I wanted to smack on the arm once in a while.
I’d told him more about Mathias than I’d told anyone and he hadn’t judged me or even looked at me with pity.
He could’ve said I’d spent enough of my life grieving for a man I hadn’t even married. Or he could’ve said it was time to move on. The list of things he could’ve said was endless.
But he hadn’t. Instead, he’d offered me his support.
Who did that?
I couldn’t even bring myself to go for a run, I was so upset. Receiving the email while I’d stared out over the lake from my living room had been like a band releasing from around my chest. I could breathe again. He didn’t hate me. If he did, he was hiding it very well.
My email dinged again and I grinned. What was he going to say now? It felt like friendly banter and I needed that. It also felt like I wasn’t the only one up, facing the world at such an early hour.
There will be a company contacting you with the visa information for the international marriages today or tomorrow. The information should help make the matchmaking easier.
I’m not into boating. I love old cars, though. Is that information that will be used in my profile?
J.
He liked old cars. That was good to know. Not that I needed to know it. The profile reference had me shaking my head with amusement. His wit was easier to see when he wasn’t trying to convince me to date him.
If I wasn’t careful, I’d start to care about this Jaxon I was getting to know. As long as he stayed over on his side of the state, I should be fine.
He liked old cars, though. I had to let him know about Lost in the ‘50s. I could keep my tone impersonal and professional like he was doing.
Me, too. Lost in the 50s is in a couple weekends. More old cars than you know what to do with. It’s one of my favorite events here. My favorite classic is the ’65 Nova.
I’ll look for that email, thanks!
C.
I hit send and then bit my lip. Was I too casual? I hadn’t started the email with business. He’d get the wrong idea. What if he wanted to call me? I didn’t want to talk on the phone at five in the morning.
The early hour had me asking myself why was he up so early?
My next thought made me pause. Why did I care?