A BAND of apprehension tightened around Jordanne’s heart. She’d put it off yesterday and today but now the moment of truth was here. She reached out and touched Alex’s cheek, desperately trying to be strong for him. What he had to say was important, even if she didn’t think it would impact upon their future together. The fact that it was important to him should make it important to her. Communication, she remembered her mother saying. Any good relationship was all about communication.
‘I’m listening,’ she said, and he turned his face and kissed her hand before placing it back in her lap.
‘When I was twenty, still in med school, I got married.’ His tone was neutral and Jordanne tried hard to read his expression but found she couldn’t. ‘We were young and impetuous but if there was one thing neither set of parents wanted it was an accidental pregnancy.’ He laughed without humour. ‘We should have been so lucky,’ he mumbled, his tone laced with irony.
Jordanne remained silent, holding his hands with hers.
‘My wife decided she wanted children straight away so we began trying.’ He exhaled slowly, his gaze never leaving hers. ‘Five years later, after every fertility test, drug or natural remedy under the sun, I signed the divorce papers. We had been unable to have children and it had wrecked our marriage.’
The band that clutched at Jordanne’s heart tightened imperceptibly.
‘It tore us both apart.’ He was silent for a whole two minutes and Jordanne wasn’t sure whether she was supposed to say something or not. She searched her mind for words of sympathy but couldn’t find any. All she could focus on were the words he’d said— ‘unable to have children’.
‘Because of this…information, I’ve steered clear of any heavy emotional relationships for the past seventeen years. The scars are still there and, as you can see, it still hurts to discuss it.’
Tears welled in Jordanne’s eyes as she empathised with the pain he was sharing.
‘You, on the other hand, are different from any of those other relationships. I’ve fought my feelings for you with everything I had, but it wasn’t enough.’ He took a deep breath before confessing, ‘You’ve become very special to me, Jordanne.’
Jordanne sighed and leaned forward to kiss him briefly on the lips, a watery smile on her lips.
Alex set her back and squeezed her hands. ‘My feelings have grown, especially this last weekend. Just having you sharing my home, sleeping in my bed—it’s made me realise that I don’t want to wake up in the mornings unless you’re there beside me.’
The tears spilled over onto Jordanne’s cheeks and Alex tenderly wiped them away. ‘Which is why I wanted to talk to you. It wouldn’t have been fair to take our relationship to the next level without confessing my past. I know you want children, Jordanne. It’s evident in everything about you. Your caring, nurturing qualities shine through so naturally, I can’t imagine you living a life without children surrounding you.’
Jordanne’s eyes widened in alarm and her breathing became shallow. ‘What…what are you saying?’
Alex closed his eyes and groaned in frustration before raking his hand through his hair. ‘This is so hard for me to do.’ He opened his eyes and looked at Jordanne, his jaw firmly set. ‘We can’t continue to see each other.’
‘But I love you,’ she said, and put her hand out to him.
Alex stood and started pacing the room. ‘No,’ he ground out fiercely. ‘Don’t love me. If you do, you’ll be doomed to a childless marriage. Believe me—’ the bitterness in his tone hit her with force ‘—I’ve been there. It’s not something I’d recommend anyone to go through.’
Jordanne stood and took a few steps towards him but he held up his hands and she stopped. ‘Alex, seventeen years is a long time,’ she reasoned. ‘There have been incredible breakthroughs in medical technology. Childless couples all around the world are having their dreams come true because of these new procedures.’ She hesitated a moment before asking, ‘Was there something medically wrong with your wife as well as yourself?’
‘Yes.’
‘See?’ she said, clinging to the hope that was surging through her body. ‘It might not be the case with me. We might stand a better chance. We can both have tests and then figure out what to do next.’
‘Tests.’ He spat the word. ‘They’re a joke. One test after another. Pinning your hopes on results and tearing away another piece of your soul when they come back negative. I’ve lived through this, Jordanne, and I care far too much about you to have you go through it.’
‘That’s my decision,’ she said forcefully, placing one hand over her heart.
‘Jordanne, it would tear us apart. I’ve been there, remember. I’ve lived that life and, quite frankly, I don’t want to live it again.’
‘We can adopt,’ Jordanne suggested, desperately searching for an alternative.
He closed his eyes momentarily and shook his head before looking at her. ‘Think about it, Jordanne. Adoption is nowhere near as easy now as it was in the past. My mother knows of a couple who have been on the adoption waiting list for almost six years now, with still no hope in sight.’
‘At least they’re trying,’ Jordanne said, feeling her anger at his negative attitude spring forth. More tears rushed down her cheeks and she impatiently brushed them away. ‘You’re not even willing to give us a chance, Alex. You may have experienced what it was like to live through a childless marriage with another woman almost twenty years ago, but that doesn’t mean the same thing would happen to us.’
‘It…won’t…work,’ he said slowly. ‘It’s been seventeen years and I still feel the pain of it. Every day. I push it out of my mind, I do my best not to think about it and then there’s Scott, about to have his third child. Do you have any idea how inadequate that makes me feel?’ He was yelling now.
‘That’s the crux of the matter, isn’t it?’ Jordanne said carefully, and stared at him in astonishment. ‘The fact that you don’t think you’re man enough to produce an heir. You’re not even willing to look at the possibility that a lot of people survive quite happily in childless marriages, whether it was intentional or not.’
‘How dare you?’
‘How dare you? Lumping me in with other statistics. Not even willing to give our relationship the chance it deserves.’
‘You’re lucky I gave it this much of a chance.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘I wanted to break it off as soon as it began because I knew I’d hurt you.’ His words plunged the room back into silence—an empty silence that held no hope.
‘Well, you were right,’ she said eventually, her voice breaking on the words. ‘You did hurt me.’ Jordanne sniffed and wiped again at the tears that refused to be stopped. ‘You had already decided before you told me that there was no future for us. You’re not even willing to compromise.’ She took a ragged breath in. ‘You’re just giving up because it’s too hard.’
Jordanne stormed from the room and began shoving her clothes into her bag, her vision blurred from the tears that continued to fall. She retrieved her toiletries from the bathroom before zipping the bag closed with finality. After locating her handbag, she walked back into the lounge room to find Alex still standing where she’d left him.
‘I think we both need some time, Alex.’
‘It’s over, Jordanne,’ he said flatly, before walking from the room.
His words incensed her once more and Jordanne reached for her mobile phone as she let herself out of his house. She called a taxi and waited in the cold night for it to arrive. At least it wasn’t raining, she reasoned, trying desperately to look for the silver lining in this very dark cloud.
As she let herself into her dark and cold apartment, Jordanne walked through to her bedroom, not switching on any lights. Dumping her bags at the foot of the bed, she threw herself down onto the pillows and allowed the tears that she’d held back so valiantly in the taxi to spill out.
She cried herself to sleep and woke at around three o’clock, feeling cold. She huddled beneath the covers, her misery once more bringing tears to her eyes. Two wonderful nights of having Alex’s arms around her and now here she was, alone and cold. She yearned for him—body, mind and soul—but at the moment the situation looked hopeless.
She reached for the spare pillow beside her and cuddled into it. ‘Alex,’ she whispered into the dark, her tone filled with despair. ‘I need you.’ The sobs came once more, tearing at her soul before they eventually subsided into small hiccups.
Taking a deep breath, Jordanne finally drifted off to sleep once more and was awoken by the buzzing of her alarm clock. Feeling as though her entire body was made of lead, she went through the motions of getting ready for work when all she really felt like doing was going back to bed and feeling sorry for herself.
During ward round and clinic, she and Alex ignored each other completely, their gazes rarely meeting. If they needed to speak, they used monosyllables. Jordanne wondered how many staff members picked up on their attitudes but then decided that she didn’t really care. The hospital grapevine could buzz all it wanted. Thanks to the doping at the IAS, she’d soon be out of a job and that meant out of this hospital—away from Alex.
Even as she thought about it, Jordanne felt fresh tears prick behind her eyes. After clinic, she decided the best thing to do was to get out of the hospital. Returning to her office, she grabbed her bag, locked her office and quickly walked out of the department and over to the doctors’ car park.
Her mobile phone rang as she climbed behind the wheel. She looked at the number of the caller which was registered on her phone’s screen. It was Alex’s secretary’s number. Jordanne put the phone down, letting the call go through to her message bank.
She ignored it until she’d pulled into the car park at the private hospital where Roberto Portatello was recovering after his total hip replacement. Listening to the message, Alex’s secretary merely told her of an appointment they had later that afternoon with the police to discuss the research project.
She pushed the thoughts from her mind and took a deep breath. She was a professional who was about to see a patient. There was no room for personal problems here.
‘You’ve had a lovers’ tiff,’ Roberto announced only moments after she’d walked into his room. Jordanne looked up at him, amazed. ‘I told you I was good at reading people. Do you want to talk about it?’
‘No, thanks.’
‘You’ll sort it out,’ he told her. ‘You and Dr Page were meant to be together.’
Jordanne looked down at Roberto’s chart and clenched her teeth to control her emotions. Taking a deep breath, she smiled up at him. ‘How are you feeling?’
‘As well as can be expected.’
She gave him a check-up. ‘Everything seems fine,’ she reported.
‘Good. Now, tell me what you found out with your research project.’ Roberto’s eyes sparkled with anticipatory delight.
Jordanne laughed and it felt good. Roberto nodded thoughtfully as she told him everything that had transpired in the past forty-eight hours concerning the pharmaceutical company.
‘That must have scared the life out of you, coming home to find your place in such a mess,’ he tut-tutted. ‘But desperate people do desperate things.’
‘That they do,’ Jordanne replied with a sigh. She wondered just how desperate Alex was to push her away. He’d said that he didn’t want to hurt her but couldn’t he see that he was hurting both of them by not giving their relationship a chance?
‘And you say the blood-test results were with you the entire time? Imagine their fury after turning both of your offices inside out and then your apartment and car and still not finding what they were looking for.’ This made Roberto laugh, a deep, rich rumbling sound that was contagious. Jordanne joined in. Yes, visiting her patient had been the tonic she’d required to help reorganise her thoughts.
‘I can see the looks on their faces. Where are those reports? Where has she hidden them? Is she onto us?’ He laughed again. ‘You would have had them in a right tizz. Good girl, I’m proud of you.’
‘I didn’t do it on purpose. At that stage I had no idea what was going on. I was just heartily confused.’
This made Roberto laugh even more. ‘Even better.’ Slowly he calmed down. ‘I love it when the bad guys get what they deserve.’ He reached out a hand to Jordanne. When she took it he said, ‘Thank you. Thank you for coming and sharing this with an old man and bringing a touch of colour back into my life.’ He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it briefly.
Jordanne felt herself begin to blush as he released her hand. ‘Let me check your wound site again. I hope you haven’t popped any sutures with all that laughing.’
‘Even if I have, it would have been worth it.’
Jordanne checked the site but amazingly everything was fine. She stayed a few minutes more before heading back to the hospital for the debrief. As she parked her car in the doctors’ car park, she saw Sally’s Mercedes parked across the way and realised that she, and probably Jed, were here for the debriefing as well.
‘You’re a few minutes late,’ Alex’s secretary told her as Jordanne rushed up the corridor.
‘I know. Sorry.’
‘They haven’t started. I’ve just taken the teas and coffees in and there’s one there for you.’
‘Thanks,’ Jordanne said as she pushed open the departmental conference-room door, apologising for being late. There was only one seat left and that was next to Alex. It would have looked churlish as well as suspicious if she asked everyone to shift around so that she didn’t have to sit next to him.
Senior Sergeant Dorne, who was in charge of the investigation, began the discussion by giving a brief background on the events so far. As the meeting progressed, Jordanne kept her gaze away from Alex and concentrated hard on what was being said, which was difficult, given that she couldn’t help but smell the scent of his cologne, which she’d become very accustomed to in the past few weeks.
When his leg accidentally touched hers beneath the table, Jordanne gasped in surprise, a spiral of desire coursing throughout her entire body. Dorne stopped speaking and everyone looked at her. She smiled, completely embarrassed, and cleared her throat.
‘You were saying?’ she prompted, and the debrief continued.
Jordanne glanced across at Sally, who was trying not to smile, and Jordanne lowered her head, her embarrassment increasing.
Taking a slow and steady breath, Jordanne moved her legs as far away from Alex’s as possible and forced her attention back to the topic at hand.
‘What’s the report from the Bransford Corporation?’ Alex asked Sally.
‘Senior Sergeant Dorne and I flew to Sydney this morning where we had a meeting with the investigators. Dad has had people working on it since I spoke to him last night. From what they’ve discovered so far, it’s one of the smaller research and development departments of the pharmaceutical company which was responsible for falsifying the data.’
‘The medication you’re using in your study is a…’ Dorne looked down at his notes ‘…non-performance-enhancing drug. Correct?’
‘Correct,’ Alex replied.
‘This company discovered that when the medication was given to people who hadn’t sustained fractures, it became a performance-enhancing drug,’ Dorne announced.
‘That means that none of those athletes the company recommended have ever had fractures.’ Jordanne nodded, the pieces finally falling into place. ‘That was why they had to falsify the X-rays and the test results.’
‘Exactly. Mr Bransford has agreed to give the investigation his full support and co-operation so hopefully some time this week we’ll be pressing formal charges against those persons involved. I’ll make sure you receive a copy of the full report.’
‘If the athletes were being doped, then the coach would have been in on it, too.’ Jordanne nodded. ‘That would explain his attitude towards me.’
‘Just from the preliminary investigations,’ Sally said, ‘it appears they had an operative at the X-ray place and at the path labs. People who could easily get their hands on the data and change the names and dates.’
Alex shook his head. ‘The lengths they’ve gone to. What about Jordanne’s job?’ Alex was the one to pose the question and she wondered whether he was as eager to have her gone as she was to leave.
‘My father would like to assure you both that Jordanne’s position as research fellow will remain until the end of the contract as stipulated in the original agreement,’ Sally said proudly. ‘You can continue with your research into bone regeneration.’
Jordanne was shocked. She looked at Sally.
‘Aren’t you happy?’ Jed asked.
‘Uh…of course.’ Jordanne quickly recovered and remembered her manners. ‘Please, thank your father for me,’ she said to Sally.
‘When he learned that the research project concerned you and Alex, he was determined to make sure you kept your job. After all, you were the ones who had operated on him after his car accident.’
‘But it’s our job.’
‘Well, he sees it as part of his job to ensure the contracts his companies undertake are adhered to.’
‘All right,’ Jordanne said, nodding. Now she had to spend the rest of this year working with Alex. How was she going to cope?
There wasn’t that much more to discuss and when the debriefing was over it was almost time to leave for the day.
Jordanne said goodbye to Sally and Jed before hurrying to her office. She tidied up her desk and locked her drawers. When the knock came on her door, she braced herself.
Jed entered without a word and closed the door behind him.
‘Feel like talking?’ he asked as he crossed to her side. Protectively, Jed placed his arms around her and Jordanne relaxed against him.
‘You know, don’t you?’ she whispered, and leaned back to look up at her brother.
‘If you’re referring to Alex being unable to have children, yes. He told me on Monday.’
Jordanne broke free from his grasp. ‘He’s not even willing to give us a chance, Jed. I can understand his pain and I feel for him, I really do but he just shut me out. He says he won’t go through tests again. That he doesn’t want to have another childless relationship.’ Jordanne bit her lower lip to stop it from wobbling.
‘I love him, Jed. Almost from the first instant I saw him, I’ve loved him.’ Jordanne’s despair was evident in her tone. ‘I don’t know what we’re going to do. I don’t see how we can continue to work together for the rest of this year.’
‘Ah, Jordanne,’ he sighed, and gathered her into his arms again. ‘Do you want me to talk to him?’
‘No. I know you mean well and I know he’s your friend but if Alex loves me, really loves me, then he wouldn’t be doing this to us. He’d be accepting whatever we could have together.’
‘I don’t know what to tell you, kiddo.’
Jordanne leaned up and kissed his cheek. ‘Just being here is enough, Jed. You’re a good brother. Thanks.’
‘And what about that hit-and-run patient you had?’ Sally asked just after the waiter had refreshed their drinks. She was wearing a lovely navy blue dress made out of raw Thai silk but Sally was the type of person who could wear a garbage bag and still look incredible.
‘Louise Kellerman?’
‘That’s the one,’ Sally replied. ‘How’s she coping?’
Jordanne knew what Sally was up to. She was trying to keep her friend’s mind off the fact that Alex hadn’t turned up at her parents’ wedding anniversary party. It had been going now for a good two hours, yet still there was no sign of him. ‘Louise is doing well. The police have caught and charged the person responsible for the hit and run. It means Louise will have to testify in court eventually but she now has some very good support on her side.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘She’s in love with the ward social worker.’
‘Dean?’ Sally’s eyes widened in disbelief. ‘How does he feel about that?’
‘The same as Louise.’
‘I hope he’s transferred her care,’ Sally said.
‘Yes, he has. She has a few more weeks in traction because of the pelvic fracture, before being transferred to the rehabilitation hospital, but she’s progressing very well.’
‘Good for them,’ Sally said heartily.
Jordanne looked down into her drink. ‘Yeah, good for them,’ she said without feeling. She looked up at Sally and gave her a watery smile. ‘When is it going to be good for me?’
Sally put her drink down and placed her arm around Jordanne’s shoulders. ‘Everything will work out fine. Trust me.’
‘Do you know something?’ Jordanne asked curiously.
‘No,’ Sally answered honestly. ‘I just know that Alex does love you, Jordanne, but he’s just having a hard time coming to terms with what it means.’
Kirsten came over to them and put her arm around Jordanne as well. She was wearing a pair of black trousers and a stunning beaded jacket. With her auburn locks falling softly to the middle of her back, Jordanne knew that her friend had turned a few heads as she’d walked across the room.
‘Is this a secret meeting or can anyone join in?’
Jordanne laughed. ‘Only you and no one else,’ she warned.
‘Hey, how’s that gunman you operated on?’
‘He’s doing fine. Did you two get together and decide what topics would be best to keep my mind off the fact that Alex isn’t coming?’ Jordanne looked from one friend to the other. They both looked extremely guilty and nodded, confirming her suspicions.
‘Well, thank you,’ Jordanne said, not about to begrudge them. ‘You’re both fantastic friends but can’t we talk about something other than patients? This is supposed to be a party, not a departmental meeting.’
Sally and Kirsten laughed. ‘What would you like to talk about?’ Sally asked.
‘How about Joel?’
‘What about Joel?’ Kirsten asked as all three of them looked across the room to where Jordanne’s brother was in deep discussion with Jed.
‘It’s eight weeks since he had surgery to his knee, and from what he mentioned to me the other day on the phone he’s looking for part-time work as a locum GP.’ Jordanne looked expectantly at Kirsten. ‘Any chance you have some extra work you need help with at your practice?’
‘That’s right,’ Sally chimed in. ‘You said to me only the other day that you were thinking about employing a locum.’
Kirsten ummed and ahhed for a moment before saying, ‘The practice is at the stage where I either need to expand or contract.’
‘A bit uncertain about things?’ Jordanne asked.
‘Yes and no,’ Kirsten replied. ‘I’m still thinking things through. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a GP but…I don’t know. Things just don’t feel…right.’
‘I’m sure you’ll work it out, but from a personal angle I’d love to have Joel move to Canberra.’
Sally laughed. ‘Three McElroys in one very small state.’
‘Territory,’ Kirsten corrected. ‘The Australian Capital Territory.’
‘I stand corrected,’ Sally said with a smile. ‘But regardless of what it’s called, I’m not sure the good people of Canberra would be able to cope.’
‘It’s an invasion,’ Kirsten joined in as they laughed.
For the first time that evening, Jordanne grasped at the happiness she felt in her heart. So what if Alex wasn’t here! So what if he didn’t want to work things out! So what if he didn’t love her.
The last thought brought the melancholy back with a vengeance. Her heart ached for him, her mind begged for the stimulating conversations they used to enjoy. Her soul was suffocating without him and her body longed to be held once more in his arms, his lips pressed firmly against her own—where they belonged.
‘Excuse me,’ Jed said as he walked towards them. ‘I’ve come to break up your tête-à-tête.’
‘I suppose you’ve shared your fiancée enough for one night, eh?’ Jordanne asked him.
‘That’s not why I came over,’ he said, although he took the opportunity to give Sally a kiss. ‘Actually, little sister, I’ve come to ask you to dance.’
‘Oh.’ Jordanne was surprised for a moment. ‘OK.’ She smiled at her friends as Jed whisked her out onto the dance floor.
‘How are you holding up?’ he asked, concerned.
Jordanne sighed. ‘I’m getting there.’
‘You have bags under your eyes and Mum is very worried. Why don’t you have a talk to her?’
‘Maybe you’re right. I could do with some of Mum’s wisdom right about now.’
Jed continued to dance her around the room. ‘I played squash yesterday afternoon with Alex,’ he said.
Jordanne’s heart rate increased and she gave her brother a wary look. ‘What did you say?’
‘Not at lot. He was in a rotten mood but he won every game.’
‘I don’t suppose he asked about me?’
‘No, but I ventured the information that you weren’t very happy and he only continued to smash that little black ball even harder. So, what are you going to do?’
‘I honestly don’t know. I told him that I’d be willing to have tests, that we could look at adoption—anything. Jed, we belong together. I can compromise. I can live a life without children.’ Even as she said the words, Jordanne felt a deep ache begin in her heart.
‘Can you? You don’t sound too sure, Jordanne.’
‘My alternative is life without Alex and I definitely know I won’t survive that.’ She wiped carefully at the tears before they spilt over her lashes, ruining her make-up. ‘I think I’ve had enough dancing, Jed.’ As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Jordanne felt a finger tap her shoulder and she turned around, only to gaze into Alex’s blue eyes. Her breathing increased and her knees started to give way but thankfully Jed’s strong arms came around her.
Alex was here! He was here! Her heart sang with elation as she glanced at him. He was wearing a pair of denim jeans and tatty old running shoes. An open-necked shirt and a sports jacket almost testified to him having left home in somewhat of a hurry.
‘Here,’ Jed said as he all but dumped Jordanne onto Alex. ‘I think she belongs to you.’
Alex had no option but to hold Jordanne in his arms and at the simple touch of his body against hers Jordanne stiffened, the signals finally getting through to her knees. She stood and glared at him for another moment.
She was aware that a few people around them had started watching, taking in Alex’s appearance with amused smiles. As all the other males in the room were dressed in tuxedos, he did look a little out of place.
‘You look…breathtaking,’ he whispered, his gaze travelling the length of her long white satin gown. It had diamanté straps and a long split in the skirt that went from her ankle almost to the top of her thigh. Her hair was loose, its dark, rich colour beautifully complementing the dress.
He didn’t look so bad either. In fact, Jordanne had never thought him more handsome than he was at this particular point in time.
‘So you decided to come after all,’ she said, amazed at how calm her voice sounded because she felt far from calm.
‘Jordanne, we need to talk.’
‘Huh. The last time you said that, you broke my heart.’ Anger prevailed. Jordanne spun on her heel and started walking from the dancing area. Alex reached for her hand. ‘Wait, Jordanne,’ he said, but she snatched her hand free. ‘Jordanne?’
She knew she was being stubborn but she didn’t want to talk. Not again. She wanted action.
‘Will you just stop!’ he yelled impatiently, and everyone around them did as he suggested. Even the band stopped playing. The entire room was plunged into silence and Jordanne looked slightly startled.
Alex, however, seemed oblivious to everyone in the room except her. ‘Jordanne,’ he said with a hint of warning in his tone. ‘We need to talk.’
‘Why?’ she answered carefully, her gaze captured by his.
‘Because I’ve made a mistake.’
Her heart breathed a small sigh of relief but she remained outwardly unmoved. ‘Yes.’
‘I’m going insane without you. I need you, Jordanne.’
‘Why?’ she whispered, tears blurring her eyes, her breath caught in her throat. It seemed as though the rest of the room held their breath as well, waiting for Alex to say the words that Jordanne so desperately needed to hear. ‘Why, Alex?’ she urged when he was silent for a long moment.
‘Because I love you and I need you beside me for the rest of my life.’
Jordanne closed her eyes, unable to keep the tears from spilling over. The next thing she felt was Alex’s hands cradling her face before his lips were pressed against her own. ‘I love you,’ he said again between kisses.
Jordanne opened her eyes and looked up at him through her tears. Tenderly he kissed them away. ‘I love you, Jordanne.’
The room was still in a stunned silence as Alex took Jordanne’s hand in his and got down on bended knee. ‘My life is meaningless without you, Jordanne. Please, come and fill it with the sunshine that radiates from deep within you. Marry me?’
Jordanne brushed the tears away from her face, not caring about ruining her make-up. Her head felt light and was spinning with complete happiness. Alex had come. Alex did love her. Alex wanted to marry her. The fact that he was here, on bended knee—surely that meant he was willing to have tests, to pursue the dream of a family with her?
She glanced down at him and felt the room begin to lurch and spin. She looked up quickly at the smiling faces all around her—her parents, who were holding hands, her siblings and her friends.
The room spun again and as Jordanne looked down at Alex the tension and emotional roller-coaster she’d been riding for the past seven days appeared to catch up with her. She closed her eyes and raised her hand to her temple before she pitched forwards, her mind going blank. The last thing she recalled was Alex’s strong arms around her.
‘She’ll be fine,’ she heard her mother’s voice saying as someone applied a cool cloth to her forehead.
‘I never faint,’ she mumbled, and received a rich laugh in reply.
‘Well, honey, you just did.’
Jordanne opened her eyes in a dimly lit room—her parents’ bedroom. It made sense. All the other bedrooms were upstairs.
‘I’ll leave you two alone,’ Jane McElroy said and made a discreet exit.
‘How are you feeling?’ Alex asked with concern.
‘Tired,’ Jordanne answered with a small smile. ‘You’re here,’ she said, reaching out to touch his cheek.
‘Yes. I’m here.’
‘I didn’t think you were coming.’
‘Neither did I, hence the way I’m dressed. Yesterday when Jed said you were miserable, the knowledge started gnawing at me because I knew I’d been the one to make you miserable. I wasn’t planning on attending, but as I prowled around my house for the umpteenth time all I could think about was you. The way you made us coffee, helped me with the dishes, showered in my bathroom and slept in my bed.’ His gaze darkened as he said the last and Jordanne shivered with excitement.
‘Everywhere I looked there were reminders of you and I couldn’t stand it any more. I realised that children or no children—I need you. I called the airport, managed to get the last seat on a flight to Sydney and then it took almost longer than the flight to get from the airport to your house. I think the taxi driver thought I was a lunatic until I told him I was on my way to propose to the most beautiful woman in the world.
‘When I arrived at your parents’ door, I realised I probably should have changed my clothes before I came, but I just wasn’t thinking straight.’
Jordanne was happy that he was here but they still had issues to resolve. ‘What about children, Alex? What are we going to do?’
‘We’ll go through the tests. You were right about medical technology. The chances of childless couples conceiving are now quite high. I want to take that chance, Jordanne, and I want to take it with you.’
‘And if we can’t have children?’
‘It doesn’t matter, Jordanne. I need you. I’ve changed a lot since I was twenty-five, and although the ache of not being able to have a family is for ever present in my life, not being able to have you by my side for the rest of my life isn’t worth even contemplating. How about you? How would you feel if we can’t conceive?’
‘I honestly don’t know, Alex, but I do know one thing. With you by my side, I feel as though I can conquer anything. We draw strength from each other, we give to each other and the past week of thinking about a life without you has almost destroyed me.’
‘I know,’ he said. ‘And I’m sorry.’
‘Shh,’ she said, and placed a finger over his lips. ‘Kiss me, Alex.’
‘With pleasure,’ he replied, and bent over the bed to press his lips to hers. ‘I love you, Jordanne. Without you, I’m only half a person. Make me whole. Make us whole. Marry me.’
‘Yes,’ she whispered as she levered herself up and straightened the straps on her dress. Alex plunged his fingers into her hair before burying his face in her neck. ‘Yes, my love.’
‘I don’t think I’ll ever get over how incredible you feel or smell or taste.’ His breath fanned her neck. Jordanne giggled, feeling goose-bumps encompass her body in a tidal wave.
‘This is how it will always be,’ she prophesied. ‘We’ll always be in love.’
‘That we will.’ Alex helped her to her feet. ‘Are you sure you’re feeling all right?’
‘I’m fine.’ Jordanne smoothed the white satin down over her midriff.
‘You’re incredibly sexy,’ Alex growled before he claimed her lips once more. ‘Even more so in that dress. After we’re married, I can see we’re going to have trouble going out to dinner.’
‘If you continue to wear these seductive outfits, we’re never going to be leaving the bedroom.’
‘Sounds good to me,’ she whispered, and pressed her lips against his. ‘You are so perfect for me, Alexander Page.’
‘And you for me, Jordanne McElroy.’
‘I think we have some explaining to do,’ she said, gesturing to the door and the party beyond.
Alex tightened his hold on her and kissed her neck once more. ‘I think…’ he kissed his way up towards her mouth ‘…that they can wait…’ his lips said against her, ‘for a bit longer.’