With the creation of an Inner Sanctuary, we have established the field of readiness for our Emergence as Universal Humans. In the stillness, we may have felt the presence of our Essential Self or perhaps a sense of expanded awareness and wholeness. At this stage, we are like the biological infant when it begins to sense itself as a separate entity, a “self.” In our Infancy as Universal Humans, the self we are becoming aware of is the Essential Self, the Higher Self. Now, in this next step, we are ready to fully contemplate this Essential Self in its more personal form, the Inner Beloved, and bring our focus to the specific qualities and wisdom of this all-knowing inner presence.
The Story…
Although I have heard and been directed by this inner voice of my Higher Self for most of my life, I had never focused my local self's attention directly on it until undertaking this process. Before, I asked, listened, heard, wrote, and then acted according to what I'd heard. I communed with God and Christ, but all the while feeling the divine, the deity, to be outside and beyond myself—separate.
The inner words I heard passed through me to the page on which I wrote but did not become me. I had never contemplated the actual presence of my Higher Self, so that I could feel it, consume it, incorporate it into my flesh and bones—incarnate it—until now.
As I turned inward toward this presence, I began to experience a sense of homecoming, of peace and safety, yet at the same time, I was filled with excitement and anticipation. I noticed the qualities of this Beloved Self who had been signaling me from afar for so long.
She—for the presence, to me, was distinctly feminine—was not merely an abstracted, “floating” inner voice. Nor was this voice identifiable as the impersonal God of the cosmos, or even as a Christ presence. Whereas before, I had experienced this presence as Christ or God, now, as I placed my attention on a personal feminine presence day by day, “she” seemed to become more real, almost tangible to me. She seemed to be myself! Yet my sense was of a magnificent presence, far beyond my current personality or gender. What I now experienced was a full range of attractive and familiar qualities of the Beloved that had been flickering at the edges of my consciousness all these years.
At first, the presence I felt was a huge shimmering field of light, but as I contemplated deeply, more personal qualities entered my awareness. She is a visionary, a seer. Yet she is warm, motherly, cozy, tender, like the mother I lost when I was twelve. She loves me unconditionally. She knows everything I ever ask her.
The Essential Self, the Beloved Presence that I am, the source of the early unitive flashes I had, was becoming familiar. I realized that I know this Essential Self better than I know my anxious local self. I am in love with this self, in contrast to my irritated, pressured, and compulsive ego. Yet this self, whom I now recognized as omnipresent in my consciousness, was not revealed until I, from the viewpoint of my local self, put attention on it in the Inner Sanctuary.
The experience in the Inner Sanctuary began to pervade my day with its current of joy. As I went about my work, I felt as though an alchemical process had begun to turn on within me. Warm currents of electricity, very pleasant and calming, flooded my physical experience. Ripples of joy swept gently through me. I noticed that a light euphoria had replaced my chronic anxiety.
My nervous system stopped being irritated by compulsive thoughts. The constant feeling of being rushed, slowly but surely, faded. If I awoke with the old twang of anxiety, I recalled my experience of the Beloved, and the nervousness seemed to disappear.
To my delight, I noticed that this process in itself was self-rewarding. Like the proverbial carrot on the end of a stick, the peace and pleasure I was now experiencing in my daily life motivated me to spend more time in the Inner Sanctuary to contemplate, feel, and enjoy the glory of the Beloved.
Several days into the process, I wrote in my journal, beginning in the voice of my local self and addressing the Beloved as I had always done:
Dearly Beloved,
I have come home to you now. I have created the Inner Sanctuary in my little apartment and am here now with my communion and meditation—the fire, the music, the flowers, the flickering candlelight, the symbol on the dollar bill I have placed in a frame (the pyramid with the cosmic eye and the phrase novus ordo seclorum—“new order of the ages”). You have infused me with your joy at last. I felt this morning, when I awoke, that instant nervous anxiety, but the connection with you was there, strong enough to withstand the fluctuations of the nervous system. I felt my nervousness batter against the connection like waves against a mighty wall. The wall stood. The protection was there. The door was closed. I feel deep in my solar plexus that something is healing, is knitting together.
I had been feeling a deep sense of anxiety that I could not bring my mission to fulfillment; my fear was that “I” would fail. Of course, I realize that this fearful, anxious “I” was an aspect of my local self, yet my local self is the one who has been carrying the burden of searching and executing. It was my local self who received signals and guidance and tried to act on them. Now the local self was being absorbed into the Essential Self and began to relax and release its anxiety.
I ask now, Beloved, what is your word for me today?
The answer came:
Every morning, as you write in this intimate way, you will be tapping into the glory that is being revealed in you. Do not think at all about your morning. We have a surprise for you that will bring joy into your heart and light into your eyes.
What is this surprise?
The surprise is you now writing directly as a Universal Human to the Universal Human in others. It is your coming out of the closet as yourself in such a way that others will be encouraged to do the same. Above all: Don't think about this.
It is thinking that is your “problem.” Each morning after your communion with me, I want you to write without thinking until the Universal Human that you are is writing directly to the Universal Human in millions of women and men. Give it no thought. Let it unfold. Write as long as the pen will flow. You are uncorking a Big Bottle here! This is what we promised you. This is the reward of union with Me. It is union with yourself. It is the life and the light and the love that you are speaking directly, now.
This kind of writing is the next step after so-called channeling. It is a direct and personal expression of the Great Creating Process itself. It is the process of the incarnation of deity. It is God expressing as you.
You are not to leave the Inner Sanctuary—ever. You are to carry it with you wherever you are. In this Sanctuary you emerge fully as a Universal Human.
It is important that you come to feel connected to your Essential Self at all times. The disconnect comes when you lose the feeling connection with who you really are.
Can you feel Me now?
Yes, I can. I feel a sort of gentle excitement and anticipation.
Yes, that excitement is Me, the One who is you, who loves you, who guides you. It is this One who is writing. She is now coming through the veil. Feel the veil dissolve. Feel Me dissolve the barrier between you and Me until we become as One. Let Me come forth into your consciousness until I am in dominion over your whole body-mind. Let Me through, Barbara. Let yourself dissolve into Me. Let your self-centered mind be completely absorbed into Me. Let Me heal and regenerate your macular degeneration [age-related loss of vision] so that you can see clearly again. I told you that you were losing your sight because you had narrowed your vision to become useful in the world. This was useful, but it is no longer necessary. What is needed now is your fullblown, full-frontal presence as Me emerging as who you truly are.
The Guidance…
The next step in the Emergence Process is very simple, yet profound. Often, as I have mentioned, we have recognized the divine outside ourselves. We have prayed to the higher power, we have worshipped God in many forms, or we have identified ourselves with the infinite, nondual reality, losing all sense of a personal self.
Occasionally, mystics experienced the divine within, but very few of us could hold this state of consciousness. Instead, we relied on priests, master teachers, or divine beings who seemed far beyond our personal, intimate knowing. Now, due to the phase change on planet Earth, when humans are gaining Godlike powers to co-destroy and co-create, our relationship with the divine is changing. We are no longer children; we must become conscious participants in the process of creation. And, in fact, countless people are becoming ever more connected to the larger whole, both internally through spiritual attunement and electronically through information media.
I believe that as Universal Humans we will gradually learn to incarnate the divine, realizing that each one of us actually is an expression of the process of creation. We are that in unique form. We are not, and never have been, separate from the Source of our being. As we cross over from ego to Essence, we recognize that we always have been one with the Great Creating Process itself, or God.
The Emergence Process is based on the experience that the Essential Self in each of us is “ripe and ready” to come in the whole way—if we make the conscious choice to focus our intention upon that deep self within. Now is the time of our Emergence. So, during the time you have set aside for being in the Inner Sanctuary, consciously turn the sunlight of your attention inward to focus upon that deeper self in whatever way you experience it: the God-within, the Beloved, the inner voice or guide, the intuitive wisdom that has been—one way or the other—guiding you all along. We are calling it the Essential Self. Use any name that is familiar to you.
Turn the attention of your local self away from its worldly considerations toward this inner presence that is connected to non-dual Reality. This takes focus and high intention. Every time the local self tries to escape into separation—into some distracting thought of what needs to be done—turn it back to the Essential Self. You will find that you know and love this self and, in fact, are magnetized by this self. It is your Essential Self! But it has been awaiting the attention of the local self's conscious regard. You will recognize it because it is profoundly familiar, even if you have never been fully aware of it before.
Essential Self-Contemplation
The key practice, once the Essential Self emerges in consciousness, is Essential Self-contemplation. To do this, spend as much time as possible allowing the magnetic needle of your attention to drift inward and upward to focus on the felt presence of your inner self. Contemplate the specific qualities of Essence that you most love. Affirm that these qualities are you.
By this attention, you will materialize the very highest qualities that you seek in yourself. These are all the qualities that the ego has been seeking by its efforts in the world. Joy. Peace. Security. Love. Wholeness. Wisdom. All these qualities are continuously present. The more you focus on them, the more they penetrate your being. Your attention manifests them in your awareness and incarnates them as you.
Do this, not only in the Inner Sanctuary but also during the day. Expand your consciousness to include awareness of your Essential Self in everything you do. When you are walking down the street, notice the presence, feel the warmth, attune to the inner voice. Gradually, we learn to keep the practice alive all day, always.
Become the Director of Your Attention
See if you can train your attention to seek a new resting point, a new base state. Instead of letting it flicker and then alight on current problems or situations, gently guide it inward and upward toward the Beloved presence within. You'll know that you have succeeded when a feeling of warmth and pleasure infuses your nervous system.
Staying with this practice creates a new “strange attractor,” a magnetic field within you, as you learn to be sensitive to this excellent biofeedback signal. The moment you feel the pang of ego expressing through anxiety, irritation, or anger, stop. Breathe. Return to Essence. We are training the inner muscle of attention to be spontaneously attracted to Essence as a new norm. For spiritual athletes, this is a vital and ongoing practice.
Forget Your Local Self
Don't be forced by the local self to pay attention to some pain, problem, or circumstance. We know that whatever gets our attention gets us, and so it follows that whatever quality of being we focus on grows within us. As the local self is occupied contemplating the glory of the Beloved—the radiant presence of the Essential Self—it stops focusing on its problems. It loses its grip on your psyche and begins to become self-forgetful. This is very good news!
The longer you can keep your attention on the Beloved, the more steady and ongoing will be the alchemical process that this focus brings. The emotions of warmth and joy are signals that the process is continuing.
We now know that emotions have an underlying biochemical process, fully coordinated by the body/mind on a physiological level. We have also learned that grief or anger or any prolonged negative emotion can cause downtime for the immune system, directly affecting the health of the body.
The Design Is Perfect-Making
Whatever happens may not be what we would have consciously chosen. Often it is not. But when we examine it in the Inner Sanctuary, we find that at the deeper level the situation is not perfect, but it “perfects” us to face it, if we choose to accept the challenge. We may experience trauma, tragedy, obstacles, but they can be interpreted as opportunities for growth, designed for our own perfect-making.
The Inner Beloved can be called upon to offer the wisest possible response to the crisis, whatever it is. At this stage, everything is meaningful. Apparently difficult experiences can be reinterpreted as precise openings for self-evolution. Facing the conditions of life both exercises and strengthens the Beloved, calling forth the deeper joy of our Essence underneath the struggle and pain.
Since I have committed to realizing my full potential in this lifetime, I choose to interpret everything that happens to me as an opportunity for self-evolution. I tell myself that if I did not need to learn from a particular experience, I would not be given it. With this understanding, I prefer to face a painful experience now rather than later, because if I face it fully now, I will learn the lesson and not have to deal with it at some future point.
Discipline of Relaxation
The sign of local self-dominance is tension. The local self feeds on stress. Whenever you notice that familiar twang of the nervous system, it is a biochemical signal that the local self has taken over, and that you are separated in consciousness from your Essence. This is the fundamental cause of the chronic anxiety that afflicts most of us in the modern, secular world.
The minute you feel the tension, stop, breathe, smile, and refocus on the Beloved. You are gaining two skills. The first is becoming director of your attention. The second is consciously fostering the alchemical process that is now beginning to work toward your transformation. You are in charge of your attention, which is vital to your Emergence.
Journal
Once again, enter your Inner Sanctuary. Contemplate your Essential Self in its more personal form, the Beloved.
Try writing about a challenge you are facing and how you can interpret it as an opportunity for growth. In what ways does it call forth your strength and lead to your own evolution? What guidance or wisdom do you receive from the Beloved? Describe the evolutionary impulse that has motivated you to transform.
In your journal, continue to describe any experiences you have had of your Essential Self. Contemplate the specific qualities of Essence you most love. Affirm that these qualities are you. What is your experience as you contemplate the Beloved? What does it feel like?
Write without thinking. Let the words flow. Use whatever language works best for you. We do not want to be divided by semantics. There are no fully agreed-upon words to describe these experiences. I tend to use evolutionary words to bridge the gap between the spiritual and the scientific worlds. Each of us can make a contribution to the languaging of our experiences so as not to divide but to include.