“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” Ryan yelled as he stomped the gas pedal to the floor.
The Audi lunged like a racehorse out of the gate, gaining a tremendous amount of speed.
“What are you doing?” I screamed. “Stop. You have to pull over.”
“The hell I do,” Ryan growled. “I’m not letting you go. You’re mine. Now and forever.”
“I’m not a thing you can own, Ryan. I’m a human being. I have the right to give my love to whomever I want to. Now pull over. Stop the fucking car.”
It was as if he didn’t hear me. Either he was too lost in his own demented mind, or intended to prove me wrong. I wasn’t sure which. The only thing certain was that the Audi continued to gain speed. Gripping the armrest with one hand, I dug my nails into the side of my seat, watching the speedometer climb.
Eighty. Eighty-five. Ninety. Ninety-five. One hundred. Red and blue flashing fields of corn whizzed past my window as I watched the police car slowly fade behind us. Ryan didn’t relent. He kept the accelerator pegged to the floor.
“Hold on, angel.” A voice that didn’t sound like Ryan echoed in my ears.
“What did you say?”
“Huh?” Ryan asked, jerking his head my direction.
Snapping his attention back on the road, he issued a cry of alarm and slammed his foot on the brake pedal. The car careened off the road. Airborne, my stomach pitched and my heart sputtered. Holding on tight, I closed my eyes. The sound of shrieking metal and breaking glass exploded all around me. Pain stabbed my chest and hips with a savage bite as the seatbelt gnawed into my body. Screaming in terror, my mind told me I was going to die. All I could see behind my closed eyes was the image of Ian and James: smiling at me.
I’d never have the chance to feel the warmth of their bodies, or the sweet caress of their touch. Never taste their moist breath as they kissed my lips. Never wake nestled in their arms, so safe and protected. Never have the chance to tell them that I’d fallen in love with them. I was going to be ripped from their lives, just as Dayne had been ripped from mine.
“No,” I screamed.
My head slammed against something hard with a jarring thud, then everything went black.
#
Surrounded in darkness, I couldn’t tell reality from dreams, or dreams from reality. Sirens screamed through my head. Voices swarmed like bees buzzing in my ears. Fear, like the icy hand of death gripped my heart, then the blackness swallowed me up once more. Floating in the dark abyss, I feared that I had died and that I was lost in the bowels of hell. No one came to claim me. I was alone…totally, helplessly alone.
From out of the darkness I heard James and Ian calling my name. Their voices were so far away, begging and pleading for me to wake up. I tried to call out to them through the murky void, but the air in my lungs felt thick and grainy, like wet sand.
Stumbling through the blackness, I ran toward the sound of their voices, only to discover I was running through a vast wasteland of corn. Fighting my way through the stalks, I then found myself clawing at rock and clay, attempting to scale cold, rocky spires of white-capped mountains. And still I couldn’t find Ian or James. The craggy peaks loomed over me, transforming to gaping jaws of death with red, malevolent eyes.
Crying out, I lost my grip on the rocks and tumbled head over heels into a bed of pansies next to my grandmother’s front door. I hadn’t been to her house since she died when I was ten. James and Ian continued to call out to me, but I couldn’t find them.
The rational, practical part of my brain told me I was dreaming, but my desolate heart leapt in defense over my mind, forcing me to continue my quest. I might have only known my two amazing Doms a short time, but they’d taught me more about life and love in those few short days than I’d experienced in my entire life. Never being able to find them again ripped at my soul. I loved, needed, and wanted them. Quitting wasn’t an option.
Liz? Miss Johansson? Someone called from behind me. Spinning in the black mist, there wasn’t anyone there. Afraid that I had stepped into the realm of insanity, like Ryan, I screamed and ran; ran toward the sound of James and Ian once again, then tumbled off the edge of the world into a dark and silent abyss.
The familiar scent of rubbing alcohol and ammonia filled my senses. Confused, I told myself that I’d fallen asleep at the nurse’s station. Mortified that someone would see me, I forced my eyes open. Pain like a sledgehammer pounded my skull, and I quickly closed them again. Trying to piece together the fragmented images fluttering out of reach, I squinted against the intense bright light and spied a heart monitor, IV stand, and SAT monitor looming next to me. I was in a hospital bed. But why? How? The level of pain consuming me assured me that I was there as a patient and not a nurse, but I couldn’t pluck a single memory from my brain. Whatever had happened, it had been major, and that scared me even more.
With slow deliberation, I rolled my head away from the machines. Sprawled out in uncomfortable-looking chairs next to my bed sat James and Ian, fast asleep. My heart turned summersaults, and a thick ball of emotion clogged my throat. The sight of them blurred from the tears that slid from my eyes. A tiny sob of joy and relief rolled off my lips. I’d found them.
Simultaneously, they both jerked awake. Their eyes grew wide, filled with a combination of fear and relief. Bolting from their chairs, they hovered over me as I cried in joy.
“Aw, sweetheart,” James softly murmured. “Don’t cry. You’re going to be all right.”
“We’re not leaving your side, little one,” Ian reassured me as tears filled his eyes and his strong chin quivered.
“Hold me,” I whispered. Reaching out to them, my right shoulder screamed in pain, and I quickly dropped my hand to the mattress. “Touch me. Please, so I know I’m not dreaming.”
Tears glistened in Ian’s eyes as he sniffed and rounded the bed. James eased onto the mattress next to me. I felt the heat of his body seconds before he gently wrapped me in his strong, safe arms. Then Ian enveloped me, too. I closed my eyes and breathed in their familiar, manly scents, absorbed the warmth of their steely bodies, and sent up a prayer of thanks.
“We were so damn scared,” Ian confessed. His voice, thick and tortured, vibrated over my skin as he buried his face against my neck. “Don’t ever scare us like that again, little one.”
“I won’t,” I vowed, shaken by the torment in his voice. “What happened? Where am I?”
In tandem they both lifted from me. Exchanging a look of apprehension, James feathered a soft caress over my pounding head.
“You were in a car accident,” James replied.
“I was?” Fear that I couldn’t remember rose up inside me.
“It’s okay that you don’t remember right now. The doctor warned us that might happen. It will come back to you. Don’t be afraid.” Ian reassured. “You remember us. That’s all that matters for now.”
“I’ve been looking for you both, but I couldn’t find you.” I murmured, fighting the pull of darkness that wanted to drag me away from them once more.
“What’s the last thing you do remember, sweetheart?” James asked.
I focused on his question as if it were a lifeline that would hold me to the here and now.
“Cindy. She figured out I was involved with both of you. She wanted details.”
“She’s a good friend, Liz. Because of Cindy, we found you,” Ian enlightened me.
“How?”
“Drake called,” Ian continued. I closed my eyes and listened to the beautiful sound of his sensual voice. “You left the ER for your dinner break, but you didn’t come back. Cindy knew something was wrong. When she couldn’t reach you on your cell phone or find your car in the parking garage she went up to Trevor’s room. She hoped that you had met us for dinner and had lost track of time.”
“That’s when Drake called, to see if you were with us. He put Cindy on the phone and we explained how Ryan had walked in on us at your house,” James expounded.
“Wait. We’re at Highland Park Hospital, right?” I asked. Fragments of Ryan and a gas station flashed in my mind.
“No, baby,” James murmured. “You’re in Marshalltown, Iowa. You were brought here by ambulance after the car crash, late last night.”
“Welcome To Grinnell,” I mumbled as the big brick sign flashed behind my eyes.
“Yes, the accident happened not far from Grinnell,” Ian confirmed.
“How did I get to Iowa? And what are you two doing here?”
“Mika flew us in on a private jet around three this morning,” James replied, completely bypassing my first question.
“And me? How did I get from Chicago to Iowa? What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I remember?” My voice rose with the panic spiking inside me.
“Relax, little one,” Ian ordered in a luscious command. “You’ve suffered a bad concussion and a couple of strained ligaments in your right shoulder. But you’re going to be just fine.”
“We’re going to take good care of you, my love,” James assured.
“My what?” I whispered, blinking to make sure I wasn’t still dreaming.
“My love,” James repeated. Bending, he feathered a kiss over my lips.
“Our love,” Ian corrected. Quickly moving in, he brushed a gentle caress over my lips as James pulled away.
They loved me. A rush of emotions so poignant and sweet rushed through me, saturating every cell in my body with elation. The idea of falling in love with someone—with two someones—in such a short amount of time seemed ludicrous, yet their declaration proved I wasn’t the only one blinded by the connection we shared.
“Please. Tell me what happened. I need to know, need to remember,” I begged.
“Are you sure you feel up to it?” James asked.
“Yes,” I said as I closed my eyes.
“After we explained to Cindy that you weren’t with us and that we’d driven you to work, she contacted Security. They began looking at the footage both in and out of the hospital.” James paused. Peeking up at him beneath my lashes, I saw him struggling to fight back tears.
“We saw you leave with Ryan,” Ian announced, grimly.
Ryan. Yes. Oh god… Ryan. Suddenly everything came rushing back in a tidal wave of anger and fear.
“I remember now…remember everything. What happened to him? Is he dead?”
“No, he’s in jail,” Ian confirmed. “James and I rushed to the hospital after Cindy’s call. They showed us the video. We watched you walk with him to his car, but we didn’t see a weapon. Everyone thought you went voluntarily, but James and I knew you didn’t. Not after you promised us—”
“I did go with him voluntary,” I whispered as I opened my eyes.
James reared back as if I’d slapped him. Ian cursed under his breath. My heart throbbed in time with my head and the air-stealing weight of guilt landed heavy on my chest.
“Ryan wanted to talk to me in private. He said he had sandwiches and drinks and asked me to go with him to the park by the lake. But instead, he drugged me and kidnapped me.”
Neither man said a word. Their searing anger and acrid disappointment filled the air and swirled between us. James stood abruptly and scrubbed a hand over his face. He paced back and forth as if trying to outrun the landslide of emotions plowing through him. Ian’s mouth melded into a thin, tight line before he lowered his head and stared at the IV lead protruding from the back of my right hand.
“Please don’t be mad. I—I know I promised I wouldn’t talk to Ryan alone, but when he showed up at the hospital, he was so apologetic…” My voice cracked. Memories of the fear I’d felt waking up in Ryan’s car after being drugged gripped me in a brutal chokehold. Tears slid from my eyes, remembering the anguish I felt when I thought I’d never see James or Ian again.
“I didn’t have any reason not to trust him.”
“No reason?” James growled. “You’re here, lying in a goddamn hospital bed. You could have fucking died because you didn’t think you needed, or maybe didn’t want our protection. You chose not to honor our request…our one request. Maybe our relationship isn’t as important to you as it is to us. Hell, maybe you trust Ryan more than you do Ian and me.”
“No, that’s not true,” I gasped.
“Then tell me why, without so much as a second thought, you yanked your promise and your submission back to go with him? That son of a bitch almost killed you.” James’ words cut deep, like a cold and wicked blade of ice.
“James,” Ian murmured.
“No. It wasn’t like th—”
“I’m not sure what hurts more, sitting here all night, staring at your unresponsive body, praying that you’d open your pretty blue eyes for us; open them for just one fucking second so we could tell you how much we love you, or knowing you lied to me…to us. You never had any intention of letting us protect you from your precious nut-job boyfriend, did you, Liz?”
“James,” Ian growled. “That’s enough.”
“I’d never choose Ryan over you, over either of you,” I sobbed, gripping a hand to my head to keep my skull from splitting in two. “I didn’t plan to go with him. It wasn’t premeditated the way you make it sound. I fucked up. I swear. I just fucked up.”
“Fuck!” James hissed, scrubbing a hand over his face before sucking in a deep breath. “I know. I know.”
Pacing, remorse lined his face before he stopped next to the bed. “I’m sorry, Liz. I’m sorry. I had no right to unleash all that on you. Son of a bitch.”
His eyes glistened in torment, then without another word James turned and stormed out of the room. Helplessly hooked up to the machines, I lay there while my heart shattered into a million pieces. My sobs echoed in the room, increasing the stabbing pain in my brain, but I couldn’t stop, couldn’t stem the heartbreak of James leaving me; abandoning me, just like all the rest.
“He’s gone for good isn’t he, Ian?” My question came out in a desolate wail, as a thousand, sharp spikes stabbed my brain.
“Shhh,” Ian soothed. “Don’t think like that. Relax, little one. Stop worrying and stop thinking. You have to rest your brain. Close your eyes. Everything’s going to be all right.”
“No, it’s not,” I murmured. Closing my eyes didn’t block the overwhelming rejection. “It’s never going to be all right again.”
I wanted to go back in time; back to when Ryan first approached me wanting to talk. I would have changed it all. Giving my trust to a madman had cost me everything, and left me with nothing; nothing but more memories to add to my haunted collection of regrets.
James had left me, taking the unmitigated joy, I’d felt waking to find them by my bed, with him. I wanted to run after him, beg him to forgive me. Find a way to make things right between us once more. But it was too late. There was nothing I could do or say to fix the mistake I’d made.
Opening my eyes, I reached out and placed my hand on Ian’s thigh. “I didn’t mean to disregard your wishes or hurt either of you. I know James thinks I lied on purpose, but I didn’t. I’d never lie to either of you on purpose. I know it’s a deal breaker for him. Probably you too. Help me, Ian. Please make him understand that I didn’t lie, that I just make a stupid mistake.”
“Stop, little one,” Ian commanded in a whisper.
As he combed his fingers through my hair I feared it might be the last time I felt Ian’s caress. The thought made me want to curl up and die.
“I know I’ve fucked things up. I don’t blame you two if you walk away. I just want you both to know I never meant to hurt you. It wasn’t on purpose, and I know the depth of damage I’ve done to us.”
“I said stop,” Ian growled with a sharp squeeze of my hand. “We’ll sort this out later. You need to sleep. Turn off your brain and stop thinking. Stop obsessing. The doctor said you need peace and quiet in order to let your head heal. We’ll still be here when you wake up.”
But for how long? Long enough for me to get well then walk away and leave me? There had to be a way for me to make amends. But I didn’t know if they’d even let me try.
Ian didn’t bother instructing me to use my words when I gave him a tiny, disheartened nod, further augmenting the hopelessness settling deep among the shattered rubble of my heart.
I felt Ian ease from the bed before he wiped the tears from my cheeks. Pride kept me from reaching out to grab his arm, to beg and plead that they give me one more chance to prove how deeply I’d fallen in love with them. But when Ian bent and kissed my forehead, I didn’t even open my eyes. Instead, I let shame and regret fill me and listened to him walk out the door.
Biting back the howl rising from inside me, I opened my eyes and pressed the call button for the nurse. Longing to escape the hollow void inside, I requested more pain meds. Watching the nurse empty the syringe of liquid refuge into my IV tube, I closed my eyes. Tears spilled down my cheeks as I welcomed oblivion.
Terrifying nightmares spooled in a never-ending loop. Though I knew I was dreaming, I couldn’t force myself to wake. Memories melded in a macabre movie with no beginning and no end. I found myself holding a gun and sitting across from Dayne at his kitchen table. I tried to force my hand open and release the weapon, but my fingers refused to work. Dayne reached out and gripped my hand, forcing my finger against the trigger as he raised it toward his mouth.
Sobbing and screaming for him to stop, I struggled to take charge of the weapon. With some kind of inhuman strength, Dayne continued to raise the gun to his mouth, ignoring my pleas. I began telling him all the reasons he needed to live, but Dayne just shook his head and smiled, then wrapped his lips around the barrel. I tried to climb over the table to stop him, but my body was frozen in the chair. All I could do was scream and sob as Dayne angled the weapon toward the roof of his mouth.
Suddenly James appeared. Standing directly behind my brother, both men looked at me with sad, sympathetic eyes. I begged James to help me stop Dayne, but my Dom only smiled wistfully. Dayne closed his eyes and squeezed my finger down on the trigger. The gun exploded, tearing through both of them. A volcano of red erupted over the walls, the table, and my body. A scream of terror ripped from my throat.
“Liz.”
“Liz. Goddamn it, Liz.”
“Wake up, baby.”
Familiar, frantic voices called to me through the horrific images of blood. Guilt sucked the air from my lungs. Gasping, I sat upright in bed. Pain ricocheted through my head as I panted out a desolate cry. Hands cupped my face, forcing my gaze, I found myself staring into James’ wild and frightened eyes.
“That’s it. Come back to us, sweetheart,” he murmured softly, the sound so totally incongruent with his expression I thought I was still dreaming. “You had a bad dream, Liz. It wasn’t real.”
“You’re alive?” I choked, digging my nails into James’ arms.
“Of course I am, sweetheart. And so are you. Shhh, whatever the nightmare was about, it’s over. You’re safe. I’ve got you.” Further proving the fact, James gathered me into his arms.
Sliding my arm around his back, I laid my head on his chest. Ebbing slowly off the ledge of terror, I focused on the steady beat of his heart. Drinking in the heat and feel of his sturdy body, I savored his living form as if it were a fine wine.
“I’m sorry I went with Ryan. I’m sorry I disappointed you. Sorry for everything. Please. Give me another chance, James. I won’t let you down again. I promise. I need you. I want you. Please don’t leave me. I don’t want to go back to existing… I want to keep living the way you’ve taught me to.”
For once, I didn’t care that I sounded pathetic and weak. Didn’t care that I opened my entire being to ultimate rejection. The nightmare of losing him had terrified me past the desire to shield myself behind my pride.
“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart, not without you. I know you simply made a bad call, trusted someone who didn’t deserve your trust. I’m sorry I lashed out at you like I did. I was scared. We almost lost you, baby. I was out of my mind worried that Ian and I finally found the perfect woman for us, and we almost had you ripped from our hands. We love you, Liz. We’ll never turn our backs and walk away from you. Never.”
My head throbbed and my body ached, but the promise that they weren’t going to leave me set my heart ablaze. Melded against his steely chest, breathing in his familiar, calming scent made me feel as if I were floating on clouds.
“Erase that worry from your mind, Liz,” Ian instructed, his voice coming from behind me.
“I’m really sorry I lost my temper, Liz,” James’ voice dripped in remorse. “I didn’t put your emotional or physical wellbeing ahead of my anger.”
“James is trying to say that he broke the first rule of Dominance,” Ian whispered sadly.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so fucking sorry.” Guilt, thick and heavy, coated his words.
“There’s nothing to apologize or forgive, James,” I assured him, dragging my fingernails over his back. A tiny smile tugged my lips. “You simply said what you were feeling. Open, honest communication, remember? It goes both ways.”
“Yes it does,” James agreed. “But that doesn’t excuse—”
“I broke a promise, too. I’m just glad that my stupid mistake isn’t going to ruin the amazing relationship I share with you two.” Praying they heard the passion, the conviction, and the depth of truth in my confession, I held my breath, waiting for one of them to speak.
Ian stood on the other side of the bed for several silent minutes. His unreadable expression alarmed me. As I reached out for him, he climbed onto the mattress and pressed in close behind me.
“We’re tenacious stubborn bastards. We don’t give up without a fight. But then, neither do you. That’s one of the things I love most about you, little one. We know you thought going with Ryan was safe,” Ian murmured close to my ear. “We’ve already forgiven you, Liz. What we need to know is if you can forgive James, and give him back your trust, so the three of us can move forward together?”
“There’s nothing to forgive him for, but yes. I never took my trust away, not from either of you.”
“Thank you, gorgeous,” James’ solid tone held relief. “I won’t lose control of myself again, I promise.”
“Even if you do, I’ll always find a way to trust you, James. You’ll make sure I do.”
A melancholy smile tugged the corners of his mouth. He bent and pressed a sweet and poignant kiss to my lips. “How would you like to go home?”
“Is that a trick question? I’d love to go home, but…” I looked at the IV and the monitors by my bed.
Ian strummed his fingertips up and down my left arm. “Not exactly home-home. You’ll have to spend a few more days in the hospital, but we can take you back to Chicago when you’re ready.”
“I’m ready now,” I eagerly replied. “But how did you two manage to pull that off?”
“We didn’t.” Ian held up his hands. “Your friend Dr. Reynolds demanded that you be transported as soon as medically possible. He told the physicians here that he would personally be held responsible for your care.”
“He did?”
“Yeah,” James grumbled, suspiciously. “That guy has a crush on you. I’ll be keeping a close eye on him.”
The green-eyed monster inside James was endearing, and more than a wee bit funny.
“No he doesn’t. Relax, Tarzan. You and Ian fulfill all the dreams I’ve ever had and probably a whole lot more I don’t know about yet.”
“Thankfully we’ll have time to investigate the new ones,” James assured me with a wicked grin before sobering. “We thought if you were surrounded by a few familiar faces, besides our own, you might heal faster and feel more secure.”
“I’ve grown deeply fond of your familiar faces, I’ll have you know.” The banter between us relaxed me far more than all the pain meds on the planet. “But yes, I would love to go home, even if it means being cooped up in a hospital room.”
“You’ll have plenty of visitors, beside us,” James promised. “Cindy’s been burning up our cell phones, calling for updates every five minutes since we arrived.”
I missed my bestie, and felt horrible that I’d put her through such a scare. I couldn’t imagine life without my fiercely, protective friend.
James tucked my hand in his. A serious expression settled over his handsome face. “There’s a detective outside who wants to talk to you. If you’re not up for answering his questions, we’ll tell him to leave. He can call, or come to Chicago later to interview you.”
“No. I’d rather do it now,” I replied. “I don’t want this dragging out and hanging over my head. Will you both stay in the room with me while he’s here?”
“We’re not going anywhere, little one. I thought we cleared that up.” Ian arched a brow.
His Dominant force sluiced through me like molasses. “Kiss me, Sir. Please.”
Though he might have tried to hide it, I saw Ian’s hard edges soften. A flicker of heat danced across his dark eyes as he leaned in and gently nudged his mouth to mine. With a purr, I kissed him back, softly, but with all the passion I held in my soul.
“Okay, you two. Before this spirals out of hand, I’ll go get the cop. Keep your clothes on,” James chuckled.
The detective didn’t ask as many questions as I had expected. But when he explained that Ryan had confessed to drugging and kidnapping me, his short interrogation made sense.
Still, being forced to relive the ordeal brought back every second of fear, and with it the realization that I could have easily died in the accident. Like a fist, mortality landed hard in my gut, underscoring the cowardly way I’d crawled inside my shell after Dayne died.
James and Ian found the key to free me from my self-imposed asylum. Because of them, I discovered more strength and courage than I knew I possessed. They stood right by my side throughout the questioning, chests puffed out, shoulders pinned back, looking every inch badass, powerful, protective Doms. I wasn’t well enough for what they’d do to me if I told them they looked cute and adorable.
After the detective left, the three of us went through an inordinate amount of paperwork, absolving the hospital of all negligence as we readied for our departure. Ian and James patiently listened to a litany of instructions should something happen to me during the flight before we were finally cleared to leave.
As they prepped to take me down to the waiting ambulance, I received another injection of morphine before my IV was removed. I tried to fight the drug and stay awake, for fear the nightmares would return. But my world turned fuzzy and black before we’d even reached the airport. Dreams did come, but they were happy ones, filled with hope and promise, and the smiling faces of my Doms.
When I surfaced to the land of the living once again, Cindy stood next to my bed, holding my hand with tears trickling down her face.
“You’re going to mess up your make-up,” I murmured thickly. “You want Sam seeing you looking a hot mess?”
Cindy choked on a sob and grinned. “Thank god you’re all right.” She leaned in and kissed my cheek. “You scared the living shit out of me. Don’t ever do that again.”
“It was never was on my list of things to do in the first place.”
“I know, honey. I know.” Cindy smoothed a hand over my hair with a watery smile. “You won’t be upset if I find Ryan and kill him with my bare hands, would you?”
“Be my guest,” I replied with a gravely groan.
Reaching for the squatty, Styrofoam cup on the tray by my bed, Cindy snatched it up and placed the tip of the straw to my lips. The cold liquid felt good sliding down my throat.
“When you’re up to it, I want to know everything that sorry sack of shit put you through, but not now…later. Right now, I just want you to get better,” she softly encouraged. “How’s the pain? Do you need more meds?”
“No. I’m tired of being drugged up. Besides, they give me wicked nightmares.”
“Morphine is wicked that way.” Cindy set the cup down but didn’t look at me. “Did Ryan… I mean he didn’t…”
“Rape me?”
“Yeah,” Cindy whispered with a hint of fear.
“No.”
“Thank god,” Cindy exhaled on a sigh of relief.
I didn’t bother telling her that he’d slapped me. Offering up that bit of information to the detective caused a potent wave of rage to roll off both Ian and James. Cindy was upset enough. I didn’t want to add more fuel to her fire. All I wanted was to put the whole horrific event in the past, where it belonged.
“There’s my angel,” Trevor exclaimed.
Wearing a big, toothless smile, he dragged his feet on the floor, positioning the wheelchair next to my bed. Trevor’s long, blonde hair swayed from side to side and my heart soared, seeing him moving on his own. The poor guy still looked as if he’d gone ten rounds with a prizefighter, but the joy he exuded lit up the room like a blinding ray of sunshine.
“Look at you. Cruising around like a bad-assed, sexy beast.” I grinned. “How’s my favorite patient?”
“Better than my favorite nurse, by the looks of you,” Trevor teased. “Damn, Liz. You look like somebody dragged you through a bucket then mopped the floor with your ass, woman.”
“Don’t candy coat it, Trevor. Tell me how you really feel.” I chuckled.
“You’ve looked better, sugar. But I’m still jealous.”
“Of what?” I gaped.
“You only have one stinking bruise.” He teased with a wink.
Cindy started to laugh. “Yeah, but she only had to fight off one lunatic. You had what? Three? Four?”
“Four,” Trevor said with pride, flexing a scrawny bicep. “But get a load of this. My friend Savannah is going to start teaching me self-defense. Once I’m all healed up, I’m going to be a badass ninja. So the next time a bunch of fuck-nuts decide to mess with me, they’ll be the ones landing in the ER. Not me.”
“That’s wonderful,” I cheered.
“How’s your head?” Trevor asked, frowning.
“It’s still there; I know by the constant throbbing. But it’s better than when I first woke up. Unfortunately, the rest of me is starting to ache in places I hadn’t noticed before.”
“I know that feeling. My face doesn’t hurt too much anymore, but my ribs? They hurt like a son of a…”
“They take the longest,” I sympathized.
Cindy squeezed my hand. “I’ll tell Reynolds to order you something other than morphine.”
“I can talk to him about it later. Right now, I’m just glad to be home.”
“Not half as glad as we are to have you here,” Cindy assured me.
“Have either of you seen James and Ian?” I asked.
“I shooed them out and told them to get some dinner or fresh air when I popped in. They haven’t left your side since you got here,” Cindy announced, as if approving of their protective mien. “They’ve been stuck like glue to you.”
“Well, they didn’t go eat. They’re next door in my room, talking to Daddy.” A hint of unease skidded over Trevor’s blue eyes.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“Nothing really,” he hedged in an unconvincing tone.
“Spill it,” I demanded.
“Honest, it’s nothing. It’s just…the guys who beat me up are back on the streets. They all posted bail.” Trevor lifted his chin courageously. “But I have a lawyer now. Reed Landes, one of Mika’s friends, is representing me. He helps a lot of our friends with legal issues. He’s already assured me that he won’t accept any kind of plea-bargain. Reed wants my case to go to trial.”
“I agree with him,” Cindy chimed in. “Those asswipes need to serve some serious jail time. I just hope the judge sends them away for years.”
“I’d rather haul them into a deserted ally and put a bullet in their heads,” Drake growled as he stepped into the room.
“We know, Daddy, we know.” Trevor rolled his eyes in mocking exasperation.
Drake’s face pinched in an unhappy scowl. “You’d better watch that sassy attitude of yours, boy. I am keeping track of your insolence and the minute—”
“I sure hope so,” Trevor giggled.
Cindy’s eyes grew wide. “Be careful, Trevor. Drake doesn’t sound like he’s kidding.”
“He’d better not be.” A lop-sided grin bloomed over Trevor’s mouth. “I like it when Daddy gets all mean and snarly. It’s a hell of a lot of fun soothing his savage beast. Mmmmm.”
Trevor’s innuendo set a lusty blaze in Drake’s eyes. “When you’re well enough, my love.”
Cindy blanched, then glanced at her watch before she bent and kissed my cheek. “I need to go back downstairs. I promised Reynolds I’d only be gone fifteen minutes. I’ll tell him to call up and switch your pain meds, but you better take them or you’ll have to deal with me. Understood, young lady?”
“Yes, boss.” I smirked.
“Damn straight. I am your boss so don’t start sassing back at me. Just take the damn meds, or else,” Cindy ordered with a mock scowl before she hurried out the door.
“That girl has a whole lot of Domme in her,” Drake laughed. “You should have seen her ordering people around last night when you didn’t come back from dinner. All she needed was a singletail in her hand and a pair of thigh high boots.”
“Yikes. I hope she’s not a Domme.”
“Why not?” Trevor asked.
“Because she and Doctor Brooks have a date Friday night.”
“Master Sam?” Trevor choked.
“Yes.” I nodded, nibbling my bottom lip.
“I’d pay money to see those two butt heads,” Drake chuckled.
I didn’t find the humor in it that Drake did, but then I still wanted to figure out a way to warn Cindy. “I need to ask you two something. How much trouble would I be in if I told Cindy that Sam was in the lifestyle?”
Both Drake and Trevor shot me matching looks of horror. “You can’t do that, Liz. You just can’t.” Drake’s tone was adamant. “If you out Sam, you out the entire club, and every member in it. That includes Ian and James.”
“You’d be labeled a player and a danger to the community,” Trevor explained with a worried expression. “Mika would have to ban you from Genesis. He wouldn’t have any other choice.”
Though I had expected as much, it didn’t keep my heart from sinking to my toes. Caught between allegiance to my best friend, and a duty to protect not only my Doms, but the entire community that had openly embraced me, I was between a rock and a hard spot.
“Aside from what it would do to your reputation, you can’t usurp Sam’s authority. It’s his right and his decision to tell her if and when he’s ready.” Drake sat on the edge of my bed and cupped my chin. “This isn’t your secret to tell, Liz. It’s Sam’s. Who you want to tell about your own submission is up to you, but promise me you’re not going to undermine Sam or sabotage your own standing as Ian’s and James’ sub at the club.”
His gray eyes bore into mine. The repercussions of revealing Sam’s kinky appetite would be huge. Drake was right; it wasn’t my place to disclose Sam’s personal business.
“I promise,” I murmured, feeling like a traitor.
“Good girl.” Drake smiled. “Trevor and I are going to head out, so you can rest. We’ll be back later to check on you.”
“Do you know where James and Ian are?”
“They’re in the waiting room talking to the gang from Genesis. They’ll be back in a little bit.”
I gave Drake a slight nod and closed my eyes as he and Trevor left the room. All alone, anxiety began to swarm like wasps. I knew there was no basis for my insecurities. I’d cared for enough high school and college athletes in the ER to know that the angst humming through my veins was nothing more than a side effect of my head trauma. Countering my disquiet, I tried to focus on my strengths, to keep weakness from taking over. It helped calm the riot within, and I slowly drifted off to sleep.
Deep, familiar voices whispered and fluttered over me. Peeking up beneath my lashes, I watched as James and Ian placed several vases of flowers on the windowsill. The scent of roses and lilac tickled my nose. Blocking out the light once more, I closed my eyes as the light and airy fragrance transported me from the dreary, hospital bed to a rolling field of brightly colored flowers. In my mind’s eye I could see the three of us running through the lush green grass, laughing and kissing. Tumbling to the ground, we’d strip off our clothes before tangling our bodies together to make passionate love in the warm sun.
“I want to go home and snuggle into bed with you two,” I mumbled with a sad pout.
“Soon, little one,” Ian promised. “You need to meet with the orthopedic doctor in the morning to start physical therapy on your shoulder.”
I wrinkled my nose, then sent him a mischievous smile. “I’d rather do other physical things with you two.”
“Not until you’re one-hundred percent well,” James instructed.
“I’m not waiting that long,” I replied defensively. “That could take months. Give me a couple—”
“You’ll wait as long as we tell you to wait, my mouthy little wench,” James warned with a stern glare.