Chapter 37

FIRE IN THE HOLE!

It’s Monday, and usually Monday lunches are the best, because the cafeteria serves up ice cream. Sometimes they even have chocolate sauce and sprinkles. But my friends and I don’t get to enjoy it, because Jenna McClue decides to serve up a fight instead.

“You bitch!” she screams, right in Brainzilla’s face. “You made out with my boyfriend!”

“Bloom?” Brainzilla gives Jenna this cool, lifted-eyebrow look that most people find super-intimidating. “Does he know he’s supposed to be your boyfriend?”

I fight the urge to crouch behind a piece of furniture. I don’t know what Jenna heard—but it must have been about me, not Brainzilla. Jenna doesn’t even glance in my direction, though. She just stares at Brainzilla’s lifted eyebrow as if she wants to rip it off.

Brainzilla frowns, like she feels sorry for Jenna. “Look, I hate to tell you this, but your so-called boyfriend has—”

“Stop talking!” Jenna screeches, just before she lunges at my best friend. Suddenly—it’s on.

Brainzilla is losing, big time! Jenna has wrapped her fingers in Brainzilla’s hair and is yanking like she’s trying to get the top off a cheap wine cooler. Brainzilla lets out a scream, and I don’t even have time to think—I just jump in and bite Jenna’s arm.

“She bit me!” Jenna is shrieking like a car alarm bent on revenge, but the minute she lets go of Brainzilla’s hair and comes after me, Flatso dives in and holds her off.

Tebow grabs Jenna and delivers her—still screeching—to a group of stunned Barbies. “Stay away from him!” Jenna screams. “Stay away from my boyfriend!”

Brainzilla’s fingers are covering her eye. I can tell it’s swollen from where Jenna’s fist caught her right under the brow bone. “Don’t worry, I will!” Zilla snarls.

And there’s a moment—just a tiny moment—when I should say, “She never went near him! That was me—Bloom tried to attack me!” But the moment slips by, and Flatso steps forward and wraps a thick arm protectively around Brainzilla’s shoulder.

“Come on,” Flatso says gently.

The entire cafeteria is silent as Flatso steers us all toward the door. Everyone stares—I feel their eyes like fingers poking at me.

“Get me out of here,” Brainzilla whispers. I catch my best friend’s spare hand, and Eggy takes up the rear. We’re just heading to the girls’ room, but I feel like we’re escorting a prisoner to the cellblock.