Chapter Five

Neith

 

Lilac-hued walls and quiet whispers greet me when I step into Bel’s bedroom. According to her, purple signifies mystery. She’d told me that right before correcting me on the appropriate name for her bedroom paint color — lilac.

 

Acri angles his head in my direction and he rises from his chair by Bel’s bedside. She tilts her head my way but is expressionless. Her complexion wan. I’d hoped she’d feel better by now.

 

“No need to leave on my account, Acri.” My smile moves from her to him.

 

He beams down at her. There’s something about the way he looks at her. It’s the same way Invier used to stare at me before things got … complicated.

 

He turns to me. “Congratulations on your new position. You’re the youngest Arbiter ever.”

 

My new position stemmed from Mehrdad’s attack and all the death it caused. It also is the result of Father’s treacherous decisions. Decisions that forced me to take dangerous actions that make my heart twist to think about. And then there’s Invier and the look Invier gave me as the airship rose.

 

I give Acri a half-hearted grin. “Under other circumstances, I would be excited but given recent events …” Normally, I must be careful not to appear weak and especially now, given my new position. However, there is no need to be anything other than honest. My new position came at an all too painful price—Portan is gone, Bel lies here recovering from injuries, and Invier is not here with me.

 

“Yes, of course.” Acri’s voice lowers. Between rebel attacks and what happened last night, there’s little to be excited about. Anxiety flutters in my chest as I think of the tasks that remain unachieved. I was supposed to push for legalization of the Phalanx yesterday but after Titane Carre murdered Mehrdad, the council meeting descended into madness.

 

Titan Kriel called for her to be punished and I had to do some fancy footwork noting that her action stemmed from the heat of passion. Luckily, Invier’s father announced it was a valid defense. I tabled the meeting before Titan Kriel could push the topic any further but I will have to be better prepared. I don’t want to go from being the youngest Arbiter to being the shortest-serving Arbiter.

 

Acri must read the stress on my face because he says, “Don’t worry Neith. You’ll do great. Bending to peck Bel’s forehead, he tells her, “See you tomorrow evening.”

 

Bel smiles as she watches him leave. It doesn’t quite reach her eyes but with what she’s been through, I can’t blame her. Limp curls lie around her head like wilting leaves desperate for a burst of energy.

 

“Sorry I couldn’t come by sooner. I’ve been in back-to-back meetings since this morning’s council meeting.” I slip into the chair Acri vacated and brush my hands over my black skirt to not only smooth out the wrinkles but also dry my palms.

 

“The meeting where you let Titane Carre kill Mehrdad?”

 

I groan internally at the frigid edge to her voice. Why would Bel be upset about Mehrdad’s murder? After everything he did, I would think she’d see his death as just. She’s the only person I’ve spoken to today who has questioned the way he died.

 

Grabbing hold of my hair, I plait it into a braid as I gather my composition and say, “I didn’t tell her to do that and there was no time to stop her. We were all surprised.”

 

“Then Titane Carre should have been punished for killing him,” she says, her voice rising and her eyes widening. “Just because we are nomers doesn’t mean we can kill each other in cold blood.”

 

Nomers? What’s that?

 

Tired from a long day, I decide now is not the time to argue with my best friend. She almost died, having lost a lot of blood from her injuries. I’d sat by her side with her mom for a few hours before the Council meeting. That was a terrifying period—waiting to see whether or not the restorers could fix her. I gulp back the memory of tears and the fear I felt at the prospect of losing someone else in my life.

 

“Listen, let me first say, I’m happy you’re feeling better,” I give her what I know is a sad smile. It shouldn’t be sad, but I’m too tired to try harder. “Now, I don’t know who updated you about the meeting—”

 

“My mom did.” Her tone remains harsh.

 

Taking a relaxing breath, I power on, “—but Mehrdad would have died anyway because the Council’s vote was for death …”

 

My words disappear as the corners of her mouth drop in disapproval.

 

“I thought you granted him leniency?”

 

“Sure, but I had the same amount of votes as those who wanted him dead.”

 

“If his father ordered the attack then Mehrdad shouldn’t have lost his life for it.”

 

“Bel, you don’t know whether Titan Cyra ordered the attack. I was actually there when Mehrdad was questioned and—”

 

“It doesn’t matter!” She sits up in bed and pushes down on the straightened index finger on her left hand with the one on her right. “You shouldn’t have let him die and”—she pushes down on her middle finger to accentuate her next point—“you should have honored the Pact once Titane Carre murdered him. Instead, you found a loophole and used that to protect her.”

 

Breathe.

 

All I can do is blink at the outrage in her voice as several silent moments pass. Letting go of my unfinished braid, I lean forward and ask, “Can you tell me what this is really about, Bel?” I keep my voice soft despite my growing anger. The fact that I’m running on less than two hours of sleep does little to improve my darkening attitude. I thought this would be a joyful visit to my best friend who escaped the clutches of death. Instead, I walked into an argument.

 

She rolls her eyes. “Forget about it.”

 

“No. I need you to tell me what is going on.”

 

Her lips thin as she pulls them inward. I’ve never known Bel to hesitate in expressing her thoughts. Although my palms are wet once again, I shift to the edge of the seat so I’m even closer to her bed. As Father has said repeatedly, Step into difficult conversations with an air of confidence, even if you don’t feel that way. It will put your opponent on the defensive.

 

“I almost lost my life because of you and Uncle Nabo’s scheming.” She shakes her head. The effort brings a grimace to her face as she must have strained her injury. She closes her eyes and slowly leans back into her pillows. When she speaks again, there’s less fire in her tone. “All that scheming and for what? Countless dead for nothing …” her voice trails off and she opens her eyes to glance at me. “You haven’t even mentioned him and you did all of this to be with him. How could you be so heartless, Neith?”

 

Now, I understand. She’s upset because she was made a character in a play she never signed up for. And it almost killed her. As to Invier … I’ll explain to her in a bit. She’ll understand.

 

“I’m sorry you got caught up in our mess, Bel.” I place a hand on hers. “I never intended for you to get hurt. Same with Father. He would never want to see you injured. And it was never my goal for anyone to die in the Pursual. I just needed a way to be with Invier.”

 

She looks to her right, eyes staring out the windows into the obsidian night beyond. “You nomers do whatever they like, regardless of the rules and without concern for the lives their actions impact.” Her voice takes on a faraway quality. “That has to stop or people will continue to die.”

 

There goes that nomer word again.

 

I can’t stop the confused frown I know is on my face. The bullet must have done more damage to Bel than I thought. She sounds perfectly delusional.

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

She scoffs derisively but doesn’t answer.

 

Out of nowhere, it dawns on me. This is about her beloved rebels. How has this turned into an argument about them? My blood boils as I lurch out of my seat and proceed to pace, taking three steps in either direction. Staring at the eastern window, I see how my arched brows nearly touch—my reflection stark and furious. I decide to admire the honeyoak floor instead.

 

“This is all about the rebels, isn’t it?” I ask, still studying the veins in the wood beneath me. “Here you are accusing me of being heartless, but you’re just as bad thinking about the rebels when my family was just attacked by a nome that has consistently undercut us at every turn.” I run my hands through my hair. “And I’m supposed to feel bad for Mehrdad or for your rebels?” I scoff. “Well, I don’t.”

 

She’s got medicine and nutrition patches on the inside of her arms. Other contraptions dot her forehead to gauge brain activity and on her chest to measure her heart beat. I don’t care how mad she is at me, even if her anger is unjustified and misdirected, I will not let us get into a petty argument over things beyond our control. I take a steadying breath and stand still.

 

“Right now, I’m tasked with finding Mehrdad’s father as he and the rest of his family have gone into hiding.” My tone softens. “I also have to make sure the Phalanx are legalized soon and ensure the secrets of last night don’t get out.”

 

Lines crinkle at the corner of her eyes. “What secrets?”

 

I would like to share so much with her but given the direction of our conversation, telling her certain aspects of last night’s events might be unwise. Adela’s steel gray eyes flash in my mind’s eye.

 

At least for now.

 

Instead, I say, “For one thing, Invier isn’t dead. I sent him off in your airship.”

 

She doesn’t blink at the information. “I figured the story mom told me of him dying was bogus. I didn’t correct her though.”

 

I clench my teeth to hold back my irritation. Nothing ever gets by this one when it comes to me. What I have to say next should shock her.

 

“Father agreed to a union between Invier and me.”

 

Her eyes grow so wide they could pop right out of her head. “What? When?”

 

“Not too long after things calmed down last night.” Recalling the moment Father gave his blessing spreads a happy warmth through me. “And I need your help to find him because I removed the tracker from your ship and now, I don’t know where he is. Can you reach out to your contacts in the Lesser Lands? Father says he’s making discreet inquiries to his friends in the Lower Houses.”

 

She squints at me, her chin dipping as she scrutinizes me.

 

What is that look for?

 

“Fine,” she says finally. “I’ll ask around but we’ve got a lot to talk about.”

 

“I wish you were happier for me but, okay.”

 

She rolls her eyes and I act as if I didn’t see it, saying, “I need to bring Invier home. His poor family—”

 

“Now, you’re worried about his family?” Her eyebrows draw down in a contemptuous glower. “Why tell them he’s dead in the first place?”

 

“A decision had to be made—”

 

Lines form between her groomed eyebrows. “What decision?”

 

Although I’d thought I wouldn’t mention the Adela situation, I realize it’s best to share now so she doesn’t accuse me later of holding out on her. She’ll say I went too far and note the ways I could have done things differently. Then, she’ll tell me what to do next and we’ll come up with a plan to bring Invier back to me and keep my nome safe.

 

I return to my seat. “There was a moment last night where I realized who the real danger was to Invier and I. That person was also a danger to my family. I chose to protect us all—”

 

There’s no need to wonder if she knows where I’m going because a flicker of understanding lights in her eyes. She shoots upright in her bed with a wince. “Are you telling me …” She yanks her hand away from me. “Neith!”

 

The revulsion in her voice is clear. I can’t look at her and gaze at my wet palms instead, rubbing them against my skirt once more.

 

“Anyway, if I can find Invier,” I quickly add to fill the growing space between us, “his family will support the Phalanx and we can finally be—”

 

“You’ve always had a knack for not knowing where the limit is, but you’ve outdone yourself this time.” Her voice quivers and I’m not sure if it’s anger I hear or fear.

 

I tip my head up to look at her. “Easy for you to say, Bel. You weren’t saddled with a difficult decision to make.”

 

“Oh yes, you had a very difficult decision and as always, you chose yourself.”

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” My hands stray to the edge of the chair, gripping them. “Adela proved disloyal. You were there when she revealed Father’s plans at the secret garden. Did you hear her tell Mehrdad about Invier and I in the narthex? There’s no way I could trust her with my family’s existence. If she could sell us out so easily, she would surely do so again.”

 

“Of course, that’s why you did it. For your nome.” Her sarcasm stings.

 

“Yes. Nome above all. You of all people need never question me on this subject.”

 

“If you truly believed the adage, you never would have had a Pursual. You would have settled on whoever was the best match for your nome. Instead, you did everything you could to hold onto an unwilling boyfriend and your position as future Titane.”

 

I don’t want to hear any more of this and stand. “Let’s talk tomorrow.”

 

The door slides open and I’m almost in the hallway when she says, “Yes. Let’s.”