Chapter Twenty-Five

Invier

 

Behind me, somebody yelps in pain and another person gets the air knocked out of them with an oompf. When I finally arrive at the box, I flip open a clear lid sitting over a black button.

 

A small voice in my head asks, Are you sure about this? I regard at the red box and the black button at its top.

 

“Push the button!” Ragni urges. “It’s killing Karax.”

 

There’s a desperation in his tone when he says the last few words and all I can think of is Kande. I don’t want to cause my friend’s father’s death. My index finger trembles as it gets closer to the black button and I close my eyes as I push down on the cold surface.

 

Nothing happens.

 

“Push it!” Abi begs in a hoarse, choked voice. The soldier’s fingers clench her neck. Her eyes have rolled back in her head.

 

I push the button and still nothing.

 

Why is this button not working? I pick the red box and lift my upper body off the ground. Cradling the box, I look at all its sides in search of instructions but there are none.

 

“Look out!”

 

I’m yanked up by the collar of my shirt and my feet leave the ground. Although it almost drops out of my hands, I’m able to hold onto the red box.

 

Staring at the soldier face to face, I notice silver goo dribbling out of her left eye and her nose. She squeezes my arm too tight and I lose sensation. With my last bit of strength, I slam the fist of my hand on the button.

 

“I have to take you to—”

 

The sky goes bright. Luckily, my back is to the blast. Both the attacking soldiers are not so lucky. Mine abandons my arm and shields her eyes with the palms of her hands. I wince at the luminescence. Something hits the floor in front of me and I don’t have to look to know it’s the soldier.

 

The ground vibrates and a loud groan rings out. Carefully taking a peek through shielded eyes, I see the brightness dim and twist around cautiously. Several of the buildings sway dangerously.

 

There’s another explosion and the force sends glass flying vertically. We’re too far away for it to reach us but a hot wind hits me in the chest and I’m forced back several steps.

 

“We’ve got to go.” Ragni throws one of Abi’s arms around his shoulder. Karax picks up the red box but all I can do is gawk as buildings topple into each other.

 

A set of three towers, all next to each other, catch my attention. Their glass walls look like jagged teeth. One building collapses on itself. A thick dust cloud hangs around the air where the building used to be.

 

The ground is still quaking when I hear a second crack that sets my teeth on edge. It’s quickly followed by a second building falling.

 

I hear a sound but I just can’t place it. Several seconds later, I hear wails clawing from the destruction to reach us as far away as we are. Must be people watching the buildings fall.

 

By the time the third crack sounds, I’m being dragged away from the catastrophe.

 

“It’s time to go.” Karax’s voice is calm and clear, cutting through the noise of the world around me. It jars me awake and I take off behind everyone, heart pacing.

 

Did I do the right thing?

 

***

 

There’s very little discussion on the trip back to Tangor. Instead, everyone focuses on the injured. Abi is knocked out but Karax says she’ll be fine.

 

I make my way over to the railing and watch the sea rush past. On the horizon, the sun sets, as I hear screams come from nowhere. Holding my head in my hands I take long, deep breaths. It was a figment of my imagination or I was hearing beams fall apart.

 

When we get to Koroda, the skipper is waiting and we get off the ship to enter his boat. He races us over bumpy waves to a crowded shore. I hear the clapping as we get closer.

 

I stand in the water and it swishes just below my knees. The admiration and love around me are all-encompassing but, I feel like a ship adrift. I splash my way to the beach and circle around the celebrants. I’ve almost reached the Savannah when Kande calls my name.

 

“Invier!”

 

She runs up and throws her arms around me in a big hug.

 

“I just found out you went to Tangor with Daddy.” She lets go and takes a step back. “He says you were a crucial part of his success in Tangor. He’s looking for you back there.” She jerks her head back to the crowd on the beach.

 

“You’re the hero of Tangor!” Her smile is brilliant in the setting sun and I wish I shared her excitement. The sound of screams stabs at my heart. Karax said the buildings were empty. Still, I wonder.

 

“I’m going to my room to get some rest.”

 

Before I can walk away, she captures my hand in hers, halting me. “He’s right here, everyone! The hero of Tangor is right here!”

 

The crowd swarms and I’m encased in a gel of bodies. All I hear are cries of “Paladin!” People congratulate me with claps to the back. My concerns dissipate and for the first time since arriving in Koroda, I'm not just a narl to everyone. It feels good.

 

Aster wiggles his way past everyone to stand on my toes and gives me a thumbs up. His smile is wide. “He’s my friend!”

 

I pat him on his head right before he’s dragged off by other people his size. They meander between the knees of the adults, then disappear into the cool breeze coming in from the sea.

 

“Bonfire!”

 

The announcement causes people to peel away from me as they return to the beach. I study at the glowing fire, transfixed. The flames leap up, searching for something to latch onto. Someone bangs on drums and a melody goes up into the air.

 

Kande is still by my side. “What next, Invier?”

 

I contemplate the question. This morning, I knew exactly how my day was going to be. I was going to swim, get food from the mess hall and relax, alone, in my room. But now, I have no answer for what I’m going to do.

 

“I hear you stepped up to the plate.” Torin shows up and claps me on the back. “We’ve got to go celebrate. Follow me.”

 

***

 

In no time, we’re in the open market section seated at a rickety wooden table with frosted glasses of teja. It’s my first time tasting it and it’s delicious with just the right amounts of bitter, sweet, and tang.

 

The bar, called The Dairy—an odd name for a place serving nothing but alcohol—was packed when we arrived, but a table became available for us as people cheered when they realized I was there. The Dairy is nothing more than a shack with one wall where the bar and its colorful drinks are lined up for all to see. Where three other walls should stand, a three-foot high railing made from bamboo holds the patrons in. From time to time, passersby notice me and yell “Hero of Tangor” or “Paladin” in my direction. Each time, the entire bar stops whatever they’re doing to cheer and bang their glasses on their tables.

 

During a particularly quiet moment, I take in my environment some more. The Dairy is packed to capacity with patrons standing outside, bottles in hand. Looking up, I realize the decor is strange but makes sense at the same time—empty bottles of all shapes and sizes hang from the ceiling with their open ends pointing at the floor. When a light sea breeze blows through the space, the bottles knock into each other, creating a soothing musical chime which clashes with the bar’s loud voices.

 

“Hero of Tangor, huh?” Torin says in disbelief but his face is bent into a small smile. “The news spread through the mess hall at dinner time. The Paladin saved Karax in Tangor, they said. There I was thinking my trainee was taking a well-deserved break today only to find out you were out there in the thick of things.” He lifts his glass. “Good on you!”

 

Thinking back to Tangor dims my enthusiasm and I put my glass to my lips.

 

“Why so glum, Paladin?”

 

I don’t need to look up from my drink to know Ragni is behind me.

 

“Milkman! Give the Paladin another round of whatever he’s drinking. On me,” he tells the bartender, a weathered old man who hasn’t smiled once.

 

“That’s okay, I’ve had more than enough.” I throw back the last of my teja. “I’ve got to get some rest so I’ll be ready for training with this one tomorrow.” I jab my thumb at Torin who smiles in approval.

 

“No, no, I won’t have it. You’re the hero of Tangor,” Ragni pulls a seat up to our table for Abi to sit. She looks better than she did the last time I saw her.

 

“If he doesn’t drink it, I will,” Abi says.

 

“How are you, Abi?” Kande delivers the words quietly. with concern. I heard you were hurt?”

 

The Milkman brings three more glasses of teja and walks away.

 

Grabbing one, Abi says, “Slight concussion. It’s nothing. Right now, I need to get drunk.”

 

I remember the concussion I had at Neith’s a few days ago and my heart drops. What would she think about what happened today?

 

Standing, I say, “Thanks for the company, guys. Let me find some food and go to bed.”

 

“What?” Ragni raises a hand in my path. “That is no way to end your glorious day. Not on my watch!”

 

He knocks back the rest of his drink and reaches for the fourth glass I refused to drink. Torin beats him to it.

 

Ragni shrugs off the loss and stands up. “We’re going to commemorate this day with a tat.”

 

“A what?” I ask.

 

“Come, you’ll see.”

 

“Uh, I don’t think it’s such a great idea,” Kande says, looking at me pointedly.

 

“Agreed. Invier’s had a few drinks. All he needs is food and rest, not a trip to a tattoo parlor where he’ll pick a chicken or some other dumb thing to put on his body.” Torin laughs and finishes up his drink. He stands up. “I’ll walk with you to the mess hall.”

 

Abi stands up and throws an arm around me as if we’re old buddies. “A tattoo is the perfect way to end the day.” She stretches her lips into a sneaky smile and tilts her head to the side. Her black braids tumble to her right and sway as a breeze passes through The Dairy. If I recall correctly, her last words to me at Tangor were to call me a “pissing narl”. I take her arm off my shoulder and return it to her.

 

“Thanks, but the next item on my itinerary is food.”

 

“I’ll go with you.” Kande jumps up.

 

Abi’s eyes flash at her. “Let the boy have fun. It’s just a tattoo. He can get the enso like the rest of us. What’s the big deal?”

 

The enso? What is it?

 

Torin frowns. “He’s not ready.” His words tumble out deep and low.

 

“You’re not ready,” Ragni says. “The Paladin has proven himself worthy to wear the mark.”

 

Kande fidgets on her side of the table, closing and opening her hands as she looks from Torin to Ragni. I’ve never seen her look so worried before and it makes me nervous. What have I gotten myself into?

 

“Does anyone care to tell me what exactly the enso is?”

 

My question does nothing to dull the tension and nobody responds. It’s only until Ragni slams a hand on the table that the mood lightens ever so slightly. He lifts his shirt to show me a simple design in the middle of his chest.

 

“This is the enso.”

 

Leaning in to get a closer look, I see what appears to be a series of black dots of varying sizes drawn in an incomplete circle. This is the symbol I noticed on people my second day here.

 

“What does it mean?” I ask.

 

“To Minim, it stands for the void, a state of nothing. It’s what we all have to be so we can be of true service to the cause,” he explains.

 

“It makes no sense. How can someone be nothing?” I say, looking for agreement from Kande and Torin who are stone-faced. Feeling less assured, I continue, “Karax told me Minim stood for something and wants a better life for everyone. How can that, or the people who support that, be nothing?”

 

Ragni and Abi look at each other, their faces bending into a knowing smile.

 

“Those of us who have committed ourselves to that goal have accepted certain truths—our lives are nothing. Those of us who understand this know we must do whatever is necessary to create the change we seek. We’ve got to be able to break ourselves down to nothing to become effective instruments of the change.”

 

“He’s not ready to commit himself yet,” Kande says. “He’s only been here for a few days.”

 

“Can you just shut up. He can speak for himself.” Abi grumbles.

 

“Don’t talk to her like that!”

 

“Or what, Torin?” Abi retorts. “I’m not one of your trainees. I can take as good as you can give and you know I’ll leave you well hurt if you ever square up with me.” Her tone is hot and her braids dance as she speaks.

 

Kande puts a hand on Torin, whose jaw flexes. Ragni whispers something to Abi and all four stare at each other.

 

“Calm down everyone,” Kande says with a beleaguered sigh and her hand moves to Torin’s chest. That forces him to break eye contact with the others and look at her. She gives him a quick nod and returns her attention to Rani and Abi.

 

“I just think it’s too early to expect Invier to commit to Minim. And, he probably has no idea how painful a tattoo can be. Especially the enso. All those pin pricks are going to hurt. He should be sober and well-fed when he makes this decision.”

 

“Exactly.” Torin nods vehemently.

 

I’m still focused on Kande’s hand on Torin’s chest. Neith used to calm me down like that. Back when I thought she loved me. A sour taste forms in my mouth as my ire builds. The dreams I had for myself. The dreams I had for us. Those are long gone, washed away like a drawing on a sandy shore.

 

Neith.

 

I’d loved her enough to lose myself to her needs. I’d wanted her happiness enough to forget about my convictions.

 

No more, I think to myself and leave The Dairy.