Chapter Thirty

Belema

 

My airship’s engine is still purring when I bound down the stairs two at a time. This isn’t my first trip to Koroda so I don’t need directions to the mess hall. That’s where he’s got to be at this time of the day.

My feet move swiftly across the grass. All I see are the white buildings in the distance. A group of four split in two to let me by and I feel their gaze pierce my back once I’ve passed.

 

Entering the mess hall, I make eye contact with a few people as I scan the room. They squint my way and mutter to each other. As I take a few more steps into the space the voices peter out and more study me. For some, their lips pull up in disgust. The hush gathers like a growing wave making its way to shore.

 

I’m still searching when the whispers curl into my ears.

 

“Where did she come from?”

“Who is she?”

“I bet she’s a narl. Look at her!”

 

I rub my arms to dull the spreading gooseflesh. The silence is broken by increasing chatter which spills across the room.

 

“Bel?”

 

Spinning toward the voice, I run to him. “Invier!” I’ve never been so relieved to see him.

 

“What’s wrong? Is Neith okay?”

 

Bile gathers in my throat. “You haven’t heard?”

 

“Heard what?” He grabs my shoulders, fingers gripping me tightly as his face pales. The entire flight here I practiced what I would say. I memorized the lines. Yet, my mouth is dry and I can’t remember the words I rehearsed.

 

“Tell me.” His eyes bulging. His concern for Neith plain. “We don’t have comms or net access here so I have no idea what’s happening out there.”

 

Shoving him off makes my tears fall freely. And finally, so do some of my terrible words. “Uncle Nabo …” I wipe my cheeks with my shirt’s sleeve. “Poor Neith and it’s all my fault…”

 

Guilt swells within me, constricting my chest. I’ve been so mad at Uncle Nabo and now he’s gone. I’m swimming in a haze of misery when Invier leads me further into the mess hall.

 

“Calm down, Bel. Have some water.” He hands me a cup of water but I slap it away. The cup smacks into the floor as liquid splashes onto my hands and my feet. There’s no time for water. There’s no time for anything else. Not after what I’ve done. The cup rolls under a table, leaving behind a darkened stain on the light wooden surface.

 

“Karax lied to me!” I sputter unable to look him in the eye. “Every single thing he said was a lie!”

 

Someone stands at a nearby table and slams the surface. “What did she just say about Karax?”

 

Through the corner of my eye, I notice a few others rise to their feet as well.

 

A tall boy with eyes the color of cobalt and ochre skin walks up to Invier. “Your friend’s causing a bit of a stir. Maybe best to get her out of here.”

 

Invier grasps my hand with a rough palm and leads me out of the mess hall. Harsh whispers follow us out the door. My thoughts are everywhere and all I can do is cry.

 

His friend trails us as we enter a building and climb several flights of stairs. We don’t stop walking until we get to a small room.

 

Wiping my wet cheeks, I take in the cramped room. A bed. An old chest of wooden drawers. A large sea shell and some other things my eyes can't focus on for the new tears swelling there.

 

What have I done?

 

Invier makes me sit on the bed and I hide my face behind wretched hands.

 

“Please Bel, tell me what it is that brought you all this way and has you like this.” He sits next to me. “Please tell me Neith is okay.”

 

“Karax and Goran.” I keep my face covered so there’s no chance I’ll have to face him. “They killed Neith’s daddy. They killed Uncle Nabo,” I say weakly.

 

Having to say those last few words drive a heated lance of pain through me. My heightened heartbeat pounds at my ears. Regret bubbles up from my depths as I wallow in not being there to comfort Neith when she found out.

 

As I’ve whispered those first truths, more spill from my lips. “He was killed in an ambush.” My voice sounds far away as if spoken by someone else in the room.

 

“There was an explosion and ... it killed him.” I wipe my tear-stained face. “The rest of the nomes don’t know yet, but my mom sent me a message and …”

 

“Why aren’t you with her?” Invier’s voice is harsh and accusatory. “You should be with Neith right now, not here. She needs someone to be with her.” He gets off the bed and walks to the room’s only window. “She has no one now,” he murmurs to himself.

 

How do I tell him that I can’t look her in the face? It was never my wish for any of this, but my intent doesn’t matter. All that matters is what happened as a result of my actions.

 

“Because I needed to let you know Goran Cyra and Karax are now partners and intent on destroying the nomes.” Standing by the door, Invier’s friend takes a step back as if stung by something.

 

“Titan Cyra is here?” he asks. I glance at him. The muscles in his face twitch and there was a slight vibration in his voice.

 

Invier faces me with a confused frown that lines his forehead and distorts the freckles on the bridge of his nose.

 

“Karax wouldn’t work with Titan Cyra.” He looks to his friend as if for support. “It would go against everything Minim stands for. Wouldn’t it?”

 

His friend blinks nervously but doesn’t say anything.

 

“Karax lied to you. He lied to me. He lied to everyone.” I look at my hands. They’re trembling. What I have to say next is going to be the toughest thing I’ve ever had to do but there’s no way out of it.

 

“It’s my fault you’re here,” I mutter. Swallowing a gulp of air, I add, “And it’s my fault Uncle Nabo is dead.”

 

I’d hoped that uttering my confession would lift the cloud of misery I’ve been under since learning of Uncle’s death. I feel no different than I did a few seconds ago. My shame will cling to me for the rest of my life.

 

Invier’s frown deepens as his eyes rake over me. As if I’m an apparition he needs to focus on in order to see.

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

My mouth dries. Keep talking. I tell myself but I clam up. I’ve made such a mess of things and I have nobody to blame but myself. If I don’t get this out, I’ll drown in my guilt and I’ll destroy everyone whose lives my tentacles of lies have touched.

 

I’ve got to make things right somehow.

 

With a shuddering breath, I add, “I was mad at Neith and Uncle so when I realized you were in Hesperia, I had … my friend bring you to Karax.

 

“I convinced Karax that if he could convince you to join Minim; it would be a blow to the nomes. They, and the rest of the world would discover that nome members support the rebellion.”

 

Nobody speaks so I continue, “In truth, I wanted to keep you away from Neith. I wanted her to feel the pain of your absence and this is the only place I was certain she wouldn’t find you.”

Invier remains quiet, staring at me with a deadpan expression.

 

“I shouldn’t have done it,” I scratch the palm of one hand. Not because it itches but to keep my hands from shaking. “I know it was wrong, but I was just so upset. Because of the two of them, I almost died. Uncle Nabo never apologized. Neith told me sorry, but, you know how she just tells you what you want to hear then moves on.” I shake my head and mutter, “My anger blinded me, and now Uncle Nabo is dead.”

 

Lifting my gaze, I see Invier’s face fall. His mouth hangs open.

 

“So,” Invier drags out the syllable, “everything Karax said about me helping Minim was just part of your sick mind?”

 

My tears flow again. “I’m so sorry.”

 

Spinning away from me, he cradles his head in his hands. I hear him mumbling under his breath but can’t make out what he’s saying.

 

“I actually thought I could help the cause. Then Karax shot missiles at Neith’s airship almost killing us.” This information stirs a reaction as Invier spins around, his jaw clenched and anguish in his topaz brown eyes. “He said Minim had nothing to do with it but given he showed up at Keshim—”

 

“You’re confusing me. Who showed up where?” Invier asks, folding his arms.

 

“I told Karax Uncle Nabo was going to Keshim to capture Goran Cyra. He told me he would kidnap Uncle but really, he wanted to kill him. He showed up and … Uncle’s dead. All because of me.”

 

Invier blinks several times as if something I said makes no sense. “When was this?”

 

“Two days ago.” I take a strangled breath.

 

Uncertainty crosses Invier’s face and he looks to his friend. “Torin? Did you know anything about this?”

 

“I had no idea.” His arms are crossed. “I’ve never been part of the inner circle.”

 

Invier’s shaking his head. “He gave me his word. No more violence.”

 

“‘His word?’” A mirthless laugh spills out of me. “Where was his word when he killed over a hundred thousand people a week ago in Tangor?”

 

Invier’s eyes bulge at my words and he looks at Torin. Alarm spreads over their features. Good. Let them get a better understanding of Karax and his evil designs.

 

“Poor Neith. She’s hardly had a break. First, the deaths and destruction at her family’s facility and now she’s dealing with the loss of her father and—”

 

“Stop.” Invier puts up a hand and I watch at it to avoid looking him in the eye. “Tangor?”

 

I nod my head vigorously.

 

Torin gasps. He’s leaning on the door as if for support. When I look at Invier, his head is in his hands and his eyes slide to the floor.

 

“I … I …” He starts, still looking at the floor. “I killed a hundred thousand people?” Invier says, his voice brittle.

 

What is he talking about?

 

Before I can ask, he storms out the door and I stare at Torin, confused. “Did he just say—?”

 

Torin’s eyes reveal his disbelief. “He pressed the button that caused the explosion. Karax told him the complex was empty.”

 

I place a hand over my mouth. “Oh, poor Invier. He was duped by Karax and … that’s my fault too. I sent him here.”

 

I run out to the hallway but don’t see him anywhere. Torin quickly passes me, racing towards the stairs.

 

“Hey!” I call. “Where are you going?”

 

“I think I know where he’s headed.”