“Yes, please. I would very much like to touch you, also.” Helen answered breathlessly.
With every step toward her rooms, her body had heated another degree, her stiffness from the ride forgotten. But Regina’s offer was too tempting to pass up. If a massage was all that came of this, she’d be happy with that.
As she undressed, sparks flew from fingers to toes, from breasts to the secret place between her legs. The tendrils of desire were like long-lost friends she’d missed these past years, yet entirely new. A new lover, in particular this person she already cared for, gave an edge of uncertainty to the intimacy Helen welcomed.
Regina’s question made her breathe a sigh of relief, even as her arousal spiked higher with the knowledge it would soon be sated.
Regina shook her head. “’Tis not necessary. Tonight is about you.”
“Hmm. We shall see.” Helen had learned plenty of ways to lead in her role, and sometimes, the best approach was biding one’s time. Meanwhile, she was eager to enjoy Regina’s attentions.
Regina quickly shed her clothes and resumed her position straddling Helen. She placed her hands on Helen’s hips and slid them slowly up to cup her breasts. Her teeth caught her lower lip, and her focus on where her fingertips traced was absolute.
Helen sucked in a breath, ready to squirm and beg. More, she wanted a closer connection to reflect the emotions that welled within her. She’d missed hugs and kisses in widowhood as much as she’d missed sex. She leaned up and slid a hand under Regina’s dark hair to tug her closer. Their lips met, and Helen shivered with passion, fleetingly noting the happy absence of stubble. Then she could only process sensation and the heady combination of the familiar act of kissing with new elements. Soft lips, hot tongue, and perhaps best of all, breasts against her own.
She fell back, and Regina followed her down, her hair curtaining around them as their kiss continued. Helen’s hands roamed her back, cataloging the smooth satin of her skin over firm pads of muscle.
When Regina’s fingers skimmed down her much softer stomach again, she flinched.
Regina raised her head. “Helen? What is it? Did I hurt you?”
“No. You are young and firm and fit. I am a lump of dough that has sat too long. I am a bit self-conscious.”
Regina straightened to straddle her hips and stare at her. “You are lovely. I have wanted you almost since our first meeting. I like my women soft. Heck, most men do, so I consider myself lucky not to have to worry about my muscles.”
They both chuckled.
“Really?” Helen checked, gripping Regina’s muscled thighs, kneading their firmness as she devoured the sight of soft breasts and skin over the firmness of Regina’s toned body.
“Really. Now, shush. My mouth has better things to do for the moment. Did you think I only wanted to touch with my hands?” She wiggled her eyebrows.
Helen sucked in a breath, her heart missing a beat.
Regina’s gaze shot to her breasts at the movement.
Exhaling on a sigh of pleasure, Helen relaxed and took another deep inhale, accepting the other woman’s attraction.
Regina proceeded to worship—there was no other word for it—Helen’s soft body with her lips following her fingers, until Helen was writhing on the bed and begging.
“Please. I cannot handle any more.”
Planting an elbow by her thigh, Regina lay between her legs. Her thumb swirled at Helen’s opening before moving up to the tight bundle of nerves as two fingers slid slowly inside of her.
Lightning shot from those fingers up Helen’s spine. She froze, part in pleasure and part because it was a tight fit. Her core teetered between arousal and pain.
Regina stilled her movements. Lifting her thumb, she blew on Helen’s nub.
“Ah,” Helen squeaked.
Regina’s cheek shifted against her inner thigh in a smile.
Feeling brave, Helen bucked her hips up an inch, driving against the invading fingers.
Regina blew again, then flattened her tongue against that sensitive protrusion.
Helen nearly exploded without any further friction. Panting, she ran a hand over Regina’s hair.
Tongue flicks ensued, and her hips thrust in counterpoint. Heat coiled in her core, and she moaned.
Of course, she’d given herself pleasure, but after the first months of missing her husband, desire had waned. She’d assumed it was age, and focused her energies on her work. Self-induced orgasms were pony rides to the full-blown gallop of this, however.
Tension built and blood flowed, centered on her lover’s interest in her most sensitive flesh. “Ohmyword, ohmyword, ohmyword,” she chanted.
Regina rose to kneel, her lips wet, and Helen moaned anew at seeing the evidence of her own arousal, barely following Regina’s next words. “I want to see you go over.”
Regina’s thumb swiped once, twice. She twisted her hand and pressed her thumb into Helen’s quivering nub while her fingers pistoned in and out.
After only one thrust, Helen set her jaw and keened. An explosion of pleasure racked her from head to toe, snapping her spine taut. Her hands clenched and unclenched against the bedcovers, and her eyelids curtained her view of Regina’s satisfied yet hungry gaze.
The finger movements against her gentled, and she loosened her muscles one by one as her brain drifted toward awareness.
Eyes fluttering open, she smiled at her lover.
Regina sat back and sucked her fingers into her mouth.
A little spasm of rapture caught Helen off guard. Those digits had been inside her a moment ago. She took advantage of the woman’s distraction and sat up, pushing her sideways to lie on the bed.
“My turn.”
Regina was on fire watching Helen derive sensual satisfaction at her hands and lips.
She’d sat back to savor her partner’s essence, sucking on her fingers, the salty musky flavor further igniting her passion.
Then the room tilted, and she found herself on her back, Helen looming over her with a satisfied smirk, her demand ringing in Regina’s ears.
“You don’t have to.” Regina couldn’t believe the words that escaped her. She was so on edge that she didn’t need an expert touch to explode. Her skin was itchy, craving friction from Helen’s soft sweetness. Her core pulsed, wanting to grind against Helen’s leg. There was no reason to not let Helen explore and discover new pleasures.
“What was it you said earlier? Hush. My mouth has better things to do than argue with you.” Helen grinned.
“Right, then. Hushing underway. Please go about your business.” Regina lay back and gave a languid wave, chuckling.
Helen knelt astride her much as Regina had for her. Running her hands from forearms up to shoulders, down to belly, and finally along the long legs stretched out behind her. She seemed to be learning Regina’s body.
If she let herself think about it too much, Regina might cry. She’d never felt so admired, so cared for. Swallowing those thoughts back, she focused on the physical. Crying was never conducive to encouraging lovers to return for more.
Twisting into Helen’s touches, she exulted in the headmistress’s silky hands caressing everywhere. While she loved attention on her breasts, she was of the firm belief that any part of a person could become carnal if touched the right way, with the appropriate intention.
Helen stilled her roaming hands, and planted them on the bed by Regina’s shoulders, leaning down to kiss her again. Cushioned lips met hers, tongue seeking.
Helen pulled back. “You taste like me.”
“Yesss.” Satisfaction rang in her answer.
“It’s strange.”
“Good strange or bad strange?”
“Just strange. I haven’t tasted myself in a long while.” Helen ducked her head.
“Do you want me to sip some wine for a moment? The flavor isn’t for everyone.”
“Well, now, I don’t know yet, do I? I have nothing to compare it to—yet.” Helen gave her one last short kiss before sliding down her body.
Regina dithered, nervous. Helen had only been with her husband, but she had no idea how adventurous they’d been.
From former lovers who’d been with both genders, she understood this was considered by most to be the biggest difference of physical intimacy with men versus women. The folds, the taste, the challenge of finding the tiny little bundle of nerves. Men were easy. She did not want Helen to be put off.
If she is, do you want her as a partner?
She wasn’t sure, but the learning curve did not all have to be mastered in one night.
In the end, she’d thought too hard for too long.
Helen’s mouth hit her hot needy flesh as the rest of her soft form settled along Regina’s legs.
“Daggers. Helen.” She dug her fingers into her thick blond-gray hair.
“Show me what you like.”
Ever the demanding headmistress.
Regina chuckled as she parted her lips with one hand, and thrummed her hard kernel with a finger from her other hand.
“On either side to start. Then faster and a bit harder right on the clitoris.”
Helen appeared riveted. With a shiver, she looked up and met Regina’s gaze along the length of her front.
Regina had never seen anything sexier. She could not recall a single other lover, no one younger, prettier, or more skilled. There was only Helen and now.
“Please, touch me?” She, who had never begged in her life, was begging. She’d always been the one to control the experience, being stronger and taller, and therefore assumed to be in charge. This new vulnerability was strange and scary, but delicious.
Especially when Helen’s tongue and fingers met at her entrance and mimicked her motions of a second ago.
Her hands fell away, and she gave herself over to sensation.
Within seconds, ecstasy soared, and she clenched, her stomach muscles mounding, her toes curling, as she held Helen gently against her, whispering, “Mistress.”
Helen did not sleep that night.
Regina had cradled her in her arms, thanking her between kisses and long soothing caresses down her back. Helen had returned them happily. Sleepy, she was slow to register Regina’s actions when she climbed off the bed, dressed, gave Helen a last kiss, and let herself out to return to her own room.
Helen lay, bereft, alone in rapidly-cooling sheets that still smelled of Regina. She’d only ever been intimate with George, and they’d shared a bed. It had taken her months to sleep through the night after his death. In some ways, she considered sleeping together more vulnerable but also more satisfying than sex itself.
Perhaps not to Regina.
For the rest of the night, she itemized all the risks in their relationship. While she’d never participated in managing the stables, she’d hired Regina. The stablemistress, like everyone else there, essentially worked for her.
She ran through the students’ sponsors, past and present. Their tuition payments were what kept the place running. More importantly, their word of mouth brought in new students. Of course, she had alumnae and other associates quietly recruiting, but that alone would not sustain the costs to run the programs. But if the headmistress herself was in a relationship that, at least on paper, was illegal, there was a bigger risk of alienating would-be sponsors. It wasn’t like she was a Ton member with a lady’s companion who could hide a deeper relationship under the guise of propriety.
Beyond that, it was against the rules of the school. She recalled the discussion.
“What of romantic entanglements between faculty?” a countess had asked in one of the founders’ conversations.
“We are designing this to teach young women to own their own destinies. Shouldn’t we lead by example and allow instructors to do the same?” Helen had responded with her own question.
Her sister, now the headmistress at the London charity school, shook her head. “Managing one’s own life, whether the financial or intimate aspects, could be put in jeopardy if someone with power over one’s performance at the school took advantage.”
“The property is somewhat isolated, with only a village outside its gates and two others more than an hour’s ride away.” Helen voiced her concern with a frown. After all, she’d be responsible for recruiting and retention of all employees. “Staff will feel isolated there if they must worry every friendship is being scrutinized.”
Teresa nodded. “I understand. We need a compromise. Perhaps staff may—” she searched for the word “—comingle—”
The countess snorted.
“—except managers?”
Helen pondered this. “Perhaps only managers and their direct employees are prohibited from—”
“Comingling?” the countess interjected and nearly fell out of her chair laughing.
“Keeping company with each other romantically.” She flapped a hand at the countess with a smile. “Or whatever wording you think best.”
Helen’s lips twisted as she lay in the darkness. That rule definitely applied to Regina and her.
What have I done? Will Regina care if I decline further intimacies?
She almost wished she’d been the scratching of an itch for Regina. It would make things simpler, easier.
Helen sighed into the darkness. That wouldn’t make it easier for her. She’d known before their private meal and conversation that she’d only be tempted by someone she cared for, and she wanted more than friendship with the fascinating stablemistress. However, pursuing a deeper relationship would risk the school’s future, not just her own. Instead, they were reduced to sneaking around in the darkness. Why had she not thought this through before acting on her attraction? It was one thing to bend the rules, but she could not risk everything she’d worked so hard to build. Nor was it fair to ask Regina to remain a secret.
By dawn, she had exhausted all imaginings of how to make such a partnership work with her role at the school. Determined to be as fair as possible to the other woman, she stumbled through the day in a haze of fatigue and despair. She ate with the students and staff in the main dining room after sending a note to Regina that she would come out to the stables later.
Picking her way down the path, Helen rehearsed what she’d say. Swallowing hard against tears, she took a fortifying breath and swung into the open corridor running between stalls.
Regina paced at the other end, hair gleaming, in her fanciest dress, the navy one she’d worn to their second private supper, after Helen had reassured her about the purpose of those meals.
She looked up and smiled when Helen rounded the doorway.
Helen’s heart twisted.
Focused on the need to do what was right, Helen captured her stare but was unable to return her smile.
Regina’s expression dropped to a more neutral façade, but she cast a hungry gaze up and down Helen’s form.
A spurt of warmth arrowed down from Helen’s heart to her core. Two orgasms the night before were apparently not enough to sate her lust for Regina. However, she could not let this continue. She did not want to hurt Regina more than she needed to.
Sighing, she approached and went on tiptoe to kiss Regina’s cheek.
Regina shifted and met Helen’s lips with her own.
Helen forgot her worries about being seen, falling into the kiss with body, mind, and soul. She poured her attraction, her sorrow, her respect, and her guilt into Regina’s mouth.
After a long moment, Regina broke the kiss, leaning her forehead against Helen’s. “Hullo.”
“Hello. I missed you.”
My word, where did that come from?
Regina grinned at her. “I bet you missed me. Which part?”
Helen giggled once, but sobered to ask, “Can we talk in your apartment?”
“Is that what we’re going to call it?”