Two days later, I get another delivery at work. It’s calla lilies again—amethyst this time. I almost throw them away without reading the accompanying message. But curiosity or madness overtakes me, and I find myself reaching for the card. It’s not what I’m anticipating at all.
Truth or dare? One for each of us.
I’ll take Truth: The truth is, I’m an ass.
You get Dare: I dare you to come and find me.
I stare at the words for a full minute. Is he serious? He expects me to keep playing? He wants me to go looking for him? After everything?
But each time I reread the message, I feel myself weakening. Who am I kidding? I miss him. I want him. I’m still pissed, but that doesn’t mean I love him any less.
No—I need to be strong. I throw the card into the garbage and force myself to get back to work.
Forget about him. You need to move on.
Try as I might, though, my attention keeps drifting back to that little piece of cardstock. After ten frustrating minutes, I finally sigh and reach down to grab the card out of the trash can. That’s when I notice the words on the back.
If you refuse to play, you forfeit.
I can’t help it; those words bring a smile to my face. I don’t know what I’m doing, but I flip the card over and read the original message again.
I dare you to come and find me.
What the heck does that mean? Where is he? I turn the card over again, looking for some clue, but I come up empty. I assumed he went back to New York after I sent him away. Does he want me to hop on a plane and fly up to the city? He knows I can’t afford that.
I look up at the flowers. They’re exactly like the ones he brought me on our first date. Maybe that’s the clue. Maybe he’s at Ventine’s.
It’s the only idea I have, so I grab my purse and jacket. I poke my head into my dad’s office on my way out.
“I’m leaving a little early today,” I tell him. “Is that okay?”
“Of course, of course.” He’s been treading very lightly around me these past few days. Between the accident and that scene with Calder, I think he believes I’m on the verge of some huge mental breakdown.
I wave goodbye, but he speaks as I turn away.
“I only want what’s best for you, you know,” he says. “I want you to be happy.”
It’s a strange thing for him to say out of the blue, but I smile.
“I know, Dad. Love you.”
“Love you, too,” he calls after me.
A minute later, I’m in my car, heading toward the place where Calder and I took our first steps toward a real relationship. The place where I sat next to him over one of Martin’s lavish meals and prayed the fairy tale would never end.
I don’t know what to expect now. I don’t know what I want to happen when I see him. I should refuse to play this little game. It would be the smart thing to do. The safe thing.
But when have I ever listened to the rational part of my brain?
Driving with a cast on one arm is a bit of an adventure, but I make it across town in record time. I look for Calder’s car as I pull into the parking lot at Ventine’s, but I can’t see much past the valet’s stand. I toss my keys at the startled attendant and run inside.
Calder isn’t in the lobby, and I don’t see him at the bar or any of the tables, either. I walk up to the maître d’.
“I’m supposed to be meeting Calder Cunningham here,” I say.
The man’s face lights up. “Ah, yes. Mr. Cunningham left something for you.”
Left something? He’s not here?
The maître d’ grabs something from behind his stand and passes it over to me. It’s a purple calla lily with another note wrapped around the stem.
I step back outside and uncurl the little piece of paper. Once more, I’m greeted by Calder’s scrawl.
On the right track, but you aren’t there yet!
Truth: On our first date, I told you I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to be sitting next to you. It’s still true. I’m the luckiest man in the world to have spent even that much time with you.
Dare: I dare you to believe me when I say I’m sorry. Sorry for leading you on. Sorry for pushing you away. Sorry for not trusting you enough to share my struggles with you.
If you choose to believe, I dare you to keep looking for me.
My stomach flip-flops. He shouldn’t say things like this. He shouldn’t give me hope. I can’t handle another heartbreak.
And if he’s not here, where is he?
I reread the note. Someone really needs to teach Calder to write better clues. This doesn’t tell me anything.
Except that my initial instinct was right. He knew I’d show up here at Ventine’s. At least I’m on the right track.
Our second date was at the park, so I head there next. I don’t notice anything unusual in the parking lot, but if he’s here, I know where he’ll be.
I follow the path through the trees down to the lake. The dilapidated rowboat is still where we left it. I bend and use my good arm to lift the side, sneaking a peek beneath the weathered hull. There’s another calla lily and another note.
Getting closer. Maybe home is where the heart is?
Truth: On our second date we hid under a boat, and that’s when I learned that in spite of all my protests, I would never have the strength of will to keep from touching you. When I lie alone at night, my body aches for yours. I wish I could tell you how many sleepless nights I’ve spent yearning for your touch.
Dare: I dare you to forgive me. I dare you to look past my stupidity and selfishness and see the man who needs you.
I dare you to continue the game.
My hands shake as I fold up the note. I try to hold on to my anger, to remind myself of why Calder and I shouldn’t be together, but it’s a losing battle. The rational part of my brain is telling me to stop right now, to turn around and drive home before I get in over my head again, but nothing will stop me from continuing this game.
Maybe home is where the heart is? the note said. Our third date was at Calder’s apartment. I imagine he broke the lease when he moved up to New York, but I don’t know where else to go, so I drive over to his complex.
The third lily rests on the doorstep of his old residence. I give a tentative knock at the door, but no one answers, and when I peek through the window, I see that the place is empty. He’s not here. I open the note.
No one lives here anymore. Where do you feel at home?
Truth: The only time I felt at home in this apartment was when you were here with me, on our third date. The only time I’ve felt at home anywhere since I sold the estate was by your side. In your arms.
Dare: I dare you to trust me. I dare you to believe that I would never intentionally hurt you, that the lies I’ve told and the poor choices I’ve made were done out of a misguided attempt to protect you from the worst parts of me.
You don’t need that protection. You need me to trust you, too.
I dare you to give me the chance to prove that trust to you.
His words warm me from my toes to my ears. He trusts me. He wants to earn my trust, too. It’s like he’s seen the very core of my fears and is doing everything in his power to chase them away.
I need to see him. I need to hear his voice and feel his skin beneath my hands.
Our last “date,” if you can call it that, began at my apartment. I speed the entire way there.
Once more, I find the lily and note on the doorstep.
Truth: The night I showed up at your apartment was the night I realized the true depth of my feelings for you. When you called me, I thought something terrible had happened, and it was as if my entire world came to a halt. You’ve changed me forever, Lily, and that was the night I realized how much I truly needed you—mind, body, and soul. I was a fool to forget it. I was a fool to walk away from you. I love you completely and entirely.
Dare: I dare you to love me. It’s selfish of me, I know, but your love is the only thing I truly want in this world.
I dare you to meet me where it all began—back at the gallery.
There are tears in my eyes, but I don’t bother trying to hold them back.
I brush the back of my hand against my cheeks as I head back to my car. Our next “date” of sorts was our mini-escape up to the Cunningham estate. It’s a bit of a drive, but I’d travel across the world to see Calder right now.
One thing niggles at me, though. Calder and I definitely shared a very intimate experience in the gallery at his estate, but even though that was the first time I allowed him to touch me, I don’t consider that to be where everything began. In fact, by Calder’s own account he’d noticed me months before, at the Center’s Arts & Hearts fundraiser.
Which, I remember suddenly, took place in the Frazer Center’s gallery.
I pull a U-turn at the next light and race back to the Center.
It’s late by the time I pull into the parking lot. Dad’s car is missing, so it looks like he’s already gone for the day, but I spot Calder’s silver sedan right next to the door. I park next to him and run inside.
“Calder?” I race down the hallway and back into the gallery.
He’s facing away from me, looking at some piece on the wall, but he turns when he hears me and his entire face lights up. My chest aches at the sight of him. He crosses the room to my side in a matter of heartbeats.
He has another purple lily in his hand, but it’s forgotten as he grabs me and yanks me against him. He curls his fingers against my back and buries his face in my hair, and I can feel his breath shudder in his chest as he breathes me in.
He must remember himself suddenly, though, because he stiffens and pulls away. His eyes sweep across my body, lingering on the wound on my face and the cast on my right arm.
“I didn’t know,” he says. “I—when I heard, I…” His eyes drop to my arm, then shift back to my face. “I’d been avoiding the news, the internet, anything that would remind me of my past life. Or of you. Not that it mattered. I thought of you every waking minute.” He shakes his head. “It was only chance that I saw the story, and when I realized what had happened, when I saw you’d been hurt, I… I lost it. I completely lost it.”
He pulls me closer.
“That man will pay for this,” Calder says, his voice like steel. He reaches out and touches my sling—lightly, as if he’s afraid that he might hurt me.
“We’re pressing charges,” I tell him.
He nods, but his eyes flash with anger and I know he won’t let this go easily.
But I don’t want to think about that incident now, not when he’s in front of me. I raise my hand and touch his cheek, and the warmth of his skin confirms that he is in fact real. He’s actually here in front of me.
“This is my fault,” he says. “God, I’m sorry, Lily.”
I shake my head. “You couldn’t have known this would happen.”
“But I could have guessed the reporters would come after you. I should never have left you here alone.”
I don’t have an answer, so instead I curl my hand around his neck and pull his face down to mine.
The kiss is tentative on both sides, little more than a brushing of the lips, but it sends tiny shocks all the way down to my toes. I can try to hold on to my anger, my fear, my better sense—but my body will betray me every time. My body knows the truth.
“I love you,” Calder says against my mouth. “I love you, and I promise I’ll never walk away from you again.”
“I love you, too.” I’ve waited so long to say those words that they don’t sound like enough. Not nearly enough.
But Calder’s eyes grow bright, and he breaks into a grin before leaning down and kissing me again. This kiss isn’t hesitant. This kiss holds all of the emotion of these past few weeks, all of the longing and passion and hope we’ve both held back.
When we pull away from each other, I’m grinning like an idiot. “How did you even get in here? How did you get past my dad?”
Calder chuckles and rubs the back of his head. “It took some work. I called him this morning and actually convinced him to hear me out.”
“What did you tell him?”
“The truth. That I love you. And that I was going to do everything in my power to earn your forgiveness. To make you happy. I told him that if I had to spend every day for the rest of my life on my knees begging you to forgive me, I’d do it, just for the chance to be by your side.” The corner of his mouth curls up. “I guess I convinced him, since he let me in here.”
I laugh to myself. I guess that explains why Dad was acting a little weird when I left. He guessed what was going on.
“Well?” Calder says. “Do you think you can forgive me? Are you willing to give me another chance?”
“I don’t understand,” I say. “What about your job?”
He brushes a bit of hair behind my ear with his thumb. “I quit.”
“What?”
He gives a little smile and cups my face. “I quit. The moment I heard what had happened to you, I went to Tim Renley and resigned. From there I headed straight to the airport. Took the first open flight.” He glances down at himself. “I’m stuck with only this suit and whatever’s in my pocket for now.”
He must read the incredulity on my face, because he adds, “It’s just a job. I’ll find another.”
“But it was the perfect opportunity for you.” Even now—especially now—I hate the idea of him giving it up for me.
“Perfect?” He shakes his head. “I guess you and I have different definitions of the word.” He presses his forehead against mine. “This is more important. You are more important. If I have to shovel garbage or scrub toilets or sell every last thing I own, I’ll do it if it means I can stay close to you. This is what’s perfect.”
I start to shake my head, but his hands are still on my cheeks and he stops me. “No arguments.”
I look up at him, at his dark, wicked eyes and gently curving mouth.
“But arguing is what we do best,” I tease.
He smiles. “Perhaps what you do best…”
I catch him by the front of the shirt. “Maybe I like arguing with you.”
He lowers his face to mine. “Then I will argue with you whenever you like.”
“I dare you to try.”
He kisses me, and I playfully bite down on his lip. When he pulls away, he’s laughing. It’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.
“I love you,” I tell him once more.
Calder’s grip on me tightens. “Say that again.”
I smile. “I love you, Calder Cunningham.”
“And I love you.” He grabs my face and kisses me fiercely.
The next thing I know, he’s scooping me up and carrying me out of the room.
“Where are you taking me?” I ask. I tilt my head and kiss his neck.
“To your office. I’m going to make love to you on the chair where you touched yourself.”
My cheeks grow hot, but I don’t object. He can make love to me anywhere he wants. I’m his completely.
“Truth or dare?” I whisper in his ear as he carries me down the hall.
“Dare,” he says, his voice husky.
“I dare you to stay with me forever.”
He lets out a laugh. “Is that all?”
“Do you think you’re up for the task?”
We’ve reached my office, and Calder sets me down in my chair.
“Lily,” he says. “By the end of tonight, I’m going to be your everything.”
My everything. My body trembles at the idea.
“And what about me?” I ask him breathlessly.
“You,” he says, leaning over me and touching my lips, “are already my everything. And I won’t forget that ever again.”