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Prayer
Closing my laptop, I glance at my mate, who is absorbed in reading the research notes from Nichlos at his desk. I feel a sense of pride for his unwavering commitment to finding others like me. Yet, at this moment, I struggle to concentrate on anything other than the mystery surrounding Ben and Phillip.
I grasp the importance of prioritizing the endangered shifter communities. I genuinely do. Phillip, as immortal as Avalon, and Ben, a formidable alpha shifter, shouldn't be underestimated. Logically, I know they should be fine, but an unsettling feeling within me insists that they are anything but fine.
"Avalon, My Heart, I would like to go back to Pine Valley and investigate the den. Cato and Frosty can meet with those they believe need urgent assistance, while Sebastian and Kassie will likely want to make the rounds and check on Ruthie and the other young ones. I understand the importance of being present for relocation efforts, but I strongly feel the need to return in the morning. I cannot shake the image of those suitcases sitting on the steps. Something isn't right, and I am certain of it."
Avalon adjusts his position in the chair, facing me directly, and places his papers on his lap. His expression reveals a blend of concern and indecision.
"I am not clear on what you want to do there. Please do not ask me not to be concerned about your actions. I am always worried about what might happen to you, especially now that you are carrying our child. To assure me that you've considered this thoroughly, lay out your strategy."
If it were anyone else, I might have stood up and thrown them through a wall. I am confident that my mate genuinely values me and my skills. He just struggles to express himself well. Instead of responding with aggression to his seemingly arrogant remarks, I take off the mask from my face and release the ponytail from my hair.
"I do not have a strategy. I have not been able to concentrate long enough to come up with one. My mind is too clouded with worry. Something isn't right, and that is all I can focus on right now. I want to teleport in and talk to everyone. Someone must have seen something, My Heart. It is been nine days since I dropped them off there. Those bags have been sitting there for nine days, and it is giving me the creeps."
I bury my face in my hands because it is much more than just Ben and Phillip, but I struggle to explain it to him. Before meeting Avalon, the Lovely Letters book club was the closest thing I had to friends and family, and one of them is also missing. I sigh quietly because, honestly, I do not know for sure that she is missing. It just feels like something is wrong. Just a month ago, I would never have believed that I would be married to a vampire, pregnant with his child, hunting down a maniac bent on destroying his people, and worrying about a missing immortal vampire and a bear shifter, not to mention a stranger I discuss books with twice a month. Oh my cheese, my head is going to explode.
In an instant, Avalon is by my side, his hands working on my back and his strong arms wrapping around me. One hand glides through my hair while the other traces soothing circles on my back. His gentle care eases my immediate panic, yet nothing can fully satisfy my need to know about the fate of those I hold dear.
"Sweetling, I am sorry. Please understand that I am genuinely concerned about Ben and Phillip, and I do not want you to think otherwise. I recognize that the possibility of something dreadful having occurred is very real. Phillip is a true immortal, and that is the thought I am holding onto the most. No matter what happens to him, he will come back. Besides that, I need to focus on the matters that Phillip and Ben would prioritize if they were here. While I have always trusted the alphas to handle the territories, and I intend to keep doing so, these issues surpass any single territory, putting everyone at risk. Despite my dislike for the title of Prince, I must acknowledge that the greater good outweighs the interests of a select few. Raphael is crucial where he is, and I have not reached out to him because I do not want to lie or withhold the truth about Phillip. Nichlos is juggling his role as a one-man communications hub and conducting research for more beings like you."
I extend my hand to gently stroke his cheek because he is right. Phillip had joined Ben in the effort to defend Pine Valley's more vulnerable citizens. Ben quickly participated in the search for Harley and the other conspirators against the community and alphas. While my desire for answers is sincere, I recognize the need to set aside my fears temporarily to support my mate, who bears a heavier burden than most realize. I wrap him in my arms, pulling him close in a comforting embrace.
"My Heart, I understand that you share the same concerns for our people as I do, and I am not disregarding that. There has to be a compromise that both of us can agree on. I am more than just a pregnant taxi, and I believe there's more I can contribute. I cannot bear this sense of helplessness. Would you consider coming to Pine Valley, maybe for just an hour in the morning, before we set out to accomplish our tasks? This way, we can address our responsibilities and still calm my concerns."
"It will benefit both of us to know we gave it our best shot. I understand Frosty's devastation at being pulled back, and if we uncover anything, we can share it with her and Cato. I am just struggling to fathom anything that could keep Phillip out of the picture for nine days. It seems utterly impossible to me."
Hours later, I lie enveloped in the warmth of my mate, anxiously awaiting the dawn. Despite fervently wishing it were harder for me to imagine, my mind is haunted by dreadfully dire scenarios that I desperately need to dispel. Recognizing the necessity of rest for the sake of my unborn child, I set aside the violent images that have plagued me since learning of Ben and Phillip's disappearance. Tightening Avalon's arm around me, I attempt once again to soothe my fears.
"Just one more night. Just a few more hours," I silently swear to the universe. I promise to find them and bring them home before finally succumbing to sleep, letting it clear my mind.