Have you heard the story of the rose
That blooms in the night?
Without the Sun’s presence
She grew from her own light
She did not yearn for
His warmth on her petals
For she knew she held the power
To radiate light from within
Though she had strong thorns
Her heart was always open
For those with an open heart
Can never be broken
I once knew a bird who was tamed by being convinced she was broken. They trained her to believe that if she attempted to fly free, she would experience pain. Her cage then started to feel safe. She could avoid pain within those four walls. But then something else happened. Those wings that were meant to soar lost their strength. Her life force weakened from not using her gifts, and she experienced deep sorrow. She was born a wild thing, you see. And though it was far more terrifying for her to explore the edges of this uncertain world, it was also what made her very blood sing. Her mind entrapped her within this room of doubt, but her heart knew the gate had been open the entire time. Have you allowed yourself to become caged, my love?
love is always pressing onto your body
as the sea does to a fish,
and yet the fish is unaware of the water that surrounds it
so what are we to do about this?
they say love is the oxygen of life,
but why do I see so many people gasping for air
when all they need do is inhale?
I dreamed I saw each person as a walking puzzle piece. Each one whole, yet part of a greater picture. I watched as some of the pieces fit together, adding to each other’s masterpiece. Then there were the ones that looked close to fitting but maybe weren’t quite right. And I saw how, out of fear, they forced themselves to fit until their edges became soft and molded into an entirely different shape. What they did not realize was that the shape they had before was perfect. Now the piece originally meant for them would pass right by and not recognize them. Imagine if every piece had remembered that all its strange edges and colors were not always meant to make sense at first but that they carried within them a key to the cosmic puzzle.
It was real, you and I
I can tell by the way my heart aches
Even after all this time
When I hear your name
It is a wave crashing into me
I wonder if you feel the same
But I’ve learned to let you be
I was a temporary relief
From the pain trapped beneath your skin
Oh, what a lesson to have learned
The cost of being someone’s medicine
To be alone is vastly different than to be lonely. Alone is a unique intimacy with all of life that can only be felt when the noise we normally cover silence with vanishes. To be alone is to let go of all those things you thought made up who you were, so that who you truly are finally has space to emerge. Alone is peaceful, empowering in fact. We can finally hear the voice of our own inner being and make choices from a place that is more authentic to the soul. Alone relies on no one and no thing for fulfillment, because something far deeper can be felt—the underlying current of life that connects us all.
Rip out the weeds that
Were planted in your mind
When it was unaware
You decide what blooms inside of you,
And the sweetest rose must be cared for each day
(Your mind has been thirsty for your love)
I feel a nostalgia for the present
Knowing I will never exist
Within the same moment
I am trying to learn all my lessons
Before this chapter of life
Comes to a closing
Everything I do not learn
Circles back wearing a different face
On my path, I seek to create new turns
The cost of this leaning into
The unknown’s embrace
We all have two wolves inside of us
A wolf of the night and a wolf made from light
They tell me to be careful which one I feed
But if I am to feel at home within my skin
Am I not to love the duality within?
By understanding my dark wolf
I can understand yours
Instead of turning away in judgment
I recognize we’re akin at our core
Allow your wolves to remain untamed
Like the river of life that runs in your veins
Love Will Never Ask You to Be Small
I squeezed into the small, dark places in you
Attempting to shine a light in your heart’s cave
It was easier to try and heal your wounds
Than look at all the ways in which I had betrayed myself
I knew better than to be your medicine
To play the healer and the mother
We both failed at being each other’s remedy
Shrinking is never the answer
Have you ever wondered what lies beneath her smile? Those eyes that strip you bare with a stare that runs you wild. She has an inner mystery that cannot be touched. Though many have tried to possess her, she is a rose that cannot be plucked. She yearns for joy as the desert might yearn for the rain. Yet she knows that to feel pleasure she must learn not to run from her pain. It is far easier to find a connection anchored on the surface, but she’ll demand you dive deep until you’re living in your purpose. Do not fear drowning when there is an entire ocean to explore. You’ll have to brave the dark waters, but I promise you’ll discover a life that is so much more.
It’s a gift, you know, to feel so deeply. To be sensitive is a unique superpower. Life may affect you in ways you may not have chosen for yourself. To see people as they are instead of the mirage presented . . . it’s rare. And the world needs more rarities. So be someone who truly cares and makes time to listen. The sooner you stop wishing you were different, the sooner you can hone the special set of gifts only you have. Like a treasure hunt, we seek the gems inside ourselves to give them back to the world. And that only happens by coming to know yourself. By melting the armor we were taught to wear so young, and learning the strength it takes to be soft. Only then can we feel a piece of ourselves in every person. There is a balancing art in respecting where everyone is on their path while being patient with where we stand on our own.
Tell a woman she is beautiful
And she will forget it a moment later
Like a desert flower drowning in too much water
Whisper to her of her creativity, intelligence, and strength
And she will bloom under the hot sun
She will become a rare oasis
Breathing life into all who encounter her
The honeybee that kisses her mouth
Will carry her gift of love and pollinate the rest
of the desert
Until it ripples out in a never-ending cycle
Next time, compliment something beyond her
transient beauty
She bloomed in a harsh environment
So that you could live
Grief will come and steal your breath
It will have its way with you
Until you feel there’s nothing left
I promise grief will one day leave
But not until the pain brings you to your knees
The Fingerprints You Left on My Heart
“Do you miss him?”
“Yes,” she replied
You could see their memories
Flood across her eyes
True connections never end
Through time and distance
Her heart will mend
But a part of him
Will always exist within her
That mind of yours that tells you to hide those wings
Because crawling would be safer
Quiet that voice for a moment
Let go of your grip on who you think you’re supposed to be
If you borrowed my eyes you would weep at the sight of yourself
How much will it take before you remove that blindfold you were taught to wear and see even a fraction of what I see?
I once feared losing you and becoming lost in you
Though that is what happens when your heart is outside your chest
I went over it in my mind
How she repeated the same words you had once told me
Except this time I saw through your smoke screen
I loved you without asking for it in return
I forgave you without an apology for the bridge you burned
But this time you did not break my heart
You broke my trust
And that is something far more difficult to earn
Man is afraid of his own reflection
So he travels from woman to woman
Terrified of exploring the depths of a connection
When love is the greatest experience of being human
If you want to alter the direction of your path for someone, it’s not love. If you want to change your values for someone, it’s not love. If you want to put your dreams on hold, compromise who you are, or swallow your truth for someone, it’s not love. It’s an unhealed part of you recognizing an unhealed part in them. Ironically, it is often the most passionate connection because of the intense familiarity. You have to see it for what it is. They’re a lesson, not a soul mate. They aren’t meant to fill the tears inside of you. They’re meant to further rip those tears open so you give them an honest look and finally repair what was once broken. That way, when true love does come, you will truly love from wholeness. Your ability to heal will deepen your ability to love so that you do not reduce the other into being your medicine, distraction, or possession. Do not remold who you are. Remember: Love never demands you change. It only ever demands you become honest and whole.
Growing up, my mother had a smile that never touched her eyes
And I prayed one day she would know true joy inside
When asked how she was, she would slip on the mask of radiance and say, “I’m fine.”
She learned from generations of women taught to suppress the truth and hide
You see, my mother married her best friend
A man who would have sleepwalked through life with her until the very end
But she knew their love was no longer a home, it was a trap
Filled with the space of everything they avoided looking at
One day she remembered she is the creator of her life
And when she completely started over, I never questioned why
She curled up on the couch with a new man
And her smile reached her eyes as they lay there hand in hand
Death is so long when you look at our life span
She taught me to feel infinite within my finite life
And treat it as an adventure that is bold, joyous, and grand
There is a difference between being nice and being kind. Nice can be dishonest. It can be a “yes” when we really mean “no.” Nice can be the perfect bandage for our true feelings. Nice is normal—comfortable, in fact. It doesn’t shake up our beliefs or awaken deeper layers of knowing. Nice floats along from place to place, denying the freedom that comes with choice. Kindness is different. Kindness takes strength. It takes honesty. Kindness will never ask you to sacrifice your integrity; it will hold you to it. When there has been wrongdoing, Nice will say, “It’s fine!” with a big smile and hollow eyes. Kindness will say, “This isn’t okay, and there needs to be a change, but I hold you with compassion and understanding.” Kindness knows the power in honesty and how enabling people strips us of that empowerment. Nice is taught, but kindness? Kindness is who we innately are at our core.
When your mind pulls you into the darkness of doubt, I hope you ignite the unlit wick of your heart. After all that life has thrown your way—the loss, the failure, the heartbreak—have you allowed the wildfire buried in your chest to be reduced to a candle flame? I often marvel at how so much life can be contained by your delicate skin. I hope when you reflect you see that not a single drop of time has been wasted in any breath you have taken. Many of our hearts have become unlit wicks, but for those who remember the entire sun is within them, you’ll feel the joy in every word that spills from their lips. They treat the earth as a drum beneath their dancing feet. They never grip tightly to any outcome, knowing life always brings them what they need.
I walked a mile in my ancestors’ shoes
And felt all my mother and her mother had been through
Generations of women to be seen and not heard
Our inherited beliefs told us to hustle for our worth
Many lives had to be lived for me to be born
Their experiences are encapsulated in my cells
As I become aware of my past trauma, I repair what has been torn
These patterns end with me so my future daughter
Does not have the same story to retell
And if numb is the new normal, then let me be the weird one. Let me be so moved that the simple sight of dawn breaks the silence of my soul in celebration. Let me become a blank canvas for life to paint on, for I am no longer interested in drawing perfect lines to live trapped within. Let me be forever changed by the stories that tumble from your trembling lips. Let me walk down the streets feeling naked from the inside out because I am no longer covering up who I am. Let me feel all of it. The raw and chaotic richness of life because normal would forever steal the light that dances in my eyes.
Last night I felt a heaviness in my chest
As the weight of our memories pressed upon my body
I asked Gravity to go bother someone else,
And she said, “If it is levity that you seek,
Unmask your sadness
And you will find anger
Unmask your anger
And you will find pain
Unmask your pain
And you will find joy.”
I asked her if it was truly so simple, and she said,
“The problem is that most people forget they are wearing a mask to begin with.”
One day, she realized she could not outrun her shadow
She brought it in front of her where she could see it
“Why are you so dark?” she asked
Her shadow replied,
“Darkness is the truth you avoid, and
It yearns for the light.”
Though it was painful to stand
In front of a silhouette of her unhealed pieces
She realized it was merely a part of her
That she had not made peace with
As she held herself in the love of her own arms
Her shadow became a part of her, like
The dusk of the setting sun melting into the night sky
If I asked you to tell me of heartbreak, your mind would probably wander to a past lover. But the truth is we break our own hearts long before we place them in the shaking hands of another. If I asked you to tell me of grief, you would think of the ones you have lost. The way the pain brings you to your knees, and there are no five stages for that depth of loss. If I asked you to tell me of worth, you may think only of its absence. Caught between feeling too much and not enough, waiting to become free from the story you’re trapped in. If I asked you to tell me of beauty, you would most likely think of a person or place. But I have fallen in love with the sound of your laugh and the raw look of vulnerability I sometimes glimpse on your face.
Feelings are like horses
It is best to allow them to run themselves wild
Instead of trying to tame their power
There will come a time when we all must choose
Between expressing ourselves
And suppressing ourselves
You are strong enough to forgive where others will simply resent
You are strong enough to set boundaries where others will be walked on
You are strong enough to be compassionate when others will simply judge
You are strong enough to embrace who you are where others will cover it up
You are strong enough to be soft where others will let life harden them
You are strong enough to love
You are strong
You are strong
You are strong
What is the power of a wild woman?
Is it in the curve of her hips,
Or the knowing smile on her lips?
Is it in the strength of her thighs,
Or the sparkle in her eyes?
Is it in the history her back wears,
Or her untamed hair?
Is it in her sensitivity,
Or the way her unpredictable emotions
Teach us to speak the language of creativity?
Is it in how deep her love runs,
Or the way she and the moon’s cycles are one?
Every month she experiences death
Shedding all the shadow her body has kept
The power of a wild woman
Runs through the woman
Who remembers her worth
Who recognizes her body as a portal
Through which life makes birth
A wild woman does not spend her sacred energy
Apologizing for who she is
But instead reminds other women
Of their own wild nature
Through taking care of herself
She knows she can genuinely give
She does not soften her voice
Or suppress what is truly her heart’s choice
The more I come to know the wild woman
The less I can explain her through words
So perhaps if you close your eyes
And withdraw from the world outside
Her guidance will be heard
Your mind is the house you live in
But most people do not see it this way
And so they chase the things they think they need to have
Not realizing what you have can be lost in a moment
But what you are can never be taken
And so I ask you: Is your mind a palace or a prison?
Do not fear the house of cards you built crumbling
Once that pretty ceiling is gone
You will be able to drink in the stars in the quiet of the night
And finally hear the silent invitation of your heart as she whispers softly,
“Come dance with me.”
Have you ever seen a snake
Rush her shedding process?
She moves through each phase
With fluidity and grace
Though the death of
Her old skin can be ugly
This too she knows to embrace
How strange it is to live in a world so rich in distraction and yet poor in meaningful interaction. The double tap on your screen will never replace the warmth that comes from feeling the double beat of your heart. I suppose we are living in a time that values being admired over being loved. Yet finding fulfillment in this way is on par with catching mist—you may feel something for a brief moment, but in the end you’ll always be thirsting for more.
There is a lion inside of you
And she wants to be free
I have seen glimpses of her wildness
When you forget to pull her leash
I have acted as prey
Trying to tempt her to be released
But you have muzzled her roar
Barely giving her enough air to breathe
Why do we fear the lion inside us being untamed?
When she holds the courageous power
We need to break free and change
I have no interest in living
A half-life where my lion is trapped
She intuitively guides me in
Following my soul’s map
Her roar is far louder than
The whispers of my fear
I beg you to release your lion
And claim the love that has always been here!
Do not mistake my kindness for weakness
As one might mistake the gentle elephant for being tamed
A heart that stays open even when it hurts
Is the heart willing to make the hard choice
Because it knows it is the right choice
I have no interest in being a creature of habit. But if I am to be habitual, then let my routine be one of seeking all that forces me to stretch. Let me seek what makes my blood race until I feel lightning strike my chest as this thundering heartbeat reminds me what the word “alive” really means. Underneath every fear is simply fear itself. And if death is to greet us all at one time or another, then I will return to the ground with a smile on my face in hopes that the grass that grows from my bones may become the floor that someone else dances on.
If woman is the moon
And man is the sea
No wonder he avoids her love
Her energy is like a magnet
That creates chaos within his tides
Until the order of his waves
No longer make sense
Oh, but we forget happiness
Was never meant to be organized
He Was a Lesson Dressed as Love
Allow him to become a memory
He was a part of you that needed to be felt
But your paths are now on different trajectories
To hold on would be to wear the mask of your old self
Smile at his memory, then let it go
Allow space for new love to grow
One day you may circle back around
And laugh at the days when you both wondered
When you would feel found
You are love hiding from yourself
And you looked for it in him
So of course it fell apart!
Didn’t anyone tell you love is found within?
Sometimes a lesson may wear the face of betrayal
And you may ask yourself, “How could this have happened to me?”
Remember they betrayed themselves long before they betrayed you
Do not wield their mistake like a sharpened blade
Cutting them as they have cut you
This will not mend your wounds
They feel more pain inside
Than you could ever inflict
Find the love to let them go
For that is the same love
That will set you free
We do not choose who we fall in love with
But if they are not ready to meet you on the edge
Let them go and do not try to fix their broken wings
They must fall in love with their own beating heart
Before they can finally fly with you
And I promise one day
You will meet someone who leaps without question
There was once a fish who wandered the desert for miles
It tried so very hard to keep up with the camels
Each day it pressed on through an ocean of dry sand
Wondering why everything felt so wrong
Until they reached the desert’s edge
And in front of them stretched the sea
The fish dove beneath the water
Breathing for the first time
Feeling it was finally home
Your World Is Your Perception of the World
Remember something, my love,
This reality is a brilliant trick of the senses
Do not take yourself so seriously
All our atoms dance to their own song
Do not waste your one precious life
Trying to follow someone else’s tune
Can you hear it?
Can you hear your unique song?
All Truths Exist Within a Paradox
My heart chases nothing for it knows that it is everything
My mind chases everything for it fears that it is nothing
My soul knows that everything comes from nothing
I laugh at myself for looking
At my world through a lens of two
For believing the story that I was finally worthy of love
Because I was with you
Sometimes you must let go of your pieces
For things to come back together
Trust, my love, what was is not for you
And what will be is always better
If you are brave enough to follow the voice
That is guiding you to your heart’s treasure
You’ll make every decision a mindful choice
That will lead you to a love greater than you can measure
It is beautiful to be free-spirited, but do not make the mistake of becoming attached to being nonattached. Freedom is not found in floating from person to person, in being an enigma incapable of being tied down. Let’s not romanticize it. That is avoidance. A fear that, when exploring the depths of a connection with the same people, we will have to face our own reflection. And we will, but that is where true freedom exists. Create meaningful connections with people who see you for the parts you love about yourself and the parts you are terrified of revealing. A truly free spirit is aware of their own shadow and willing to face it. They understand love takes time. That unshakeable trust is earned in everyday moments. Be brave enough to sink a little deeper with the people in your life. I promise you, they are the greatest treasures you will ever come across. They create the opportunity to understand and be understood.
I have known those who say they have the answers
But I prefer to surround myself with those who live the questions
I have known those who are the picture of success
Prisoners to their own perfection
Instead of learning to love their mess
I have known those who are afraid to commit their hearts
The luxury of so many choices
Paralyzes them from even knowing where to start
I have known those who embody great joy
They do not run from sorrow
And there is no part of themselves they wish to destroy
I have known those who understand their life to be an adventure
A brief opportunity to experience Earth
They understand true love lies in surrender
Once upon a time
A woman slipped into a world of dreams
Where all she had to do was what society told her
But in her heart she knew life was not as it seemed
So she refused to allow the world to mold her
They told her to wait for a prince to help her awaken
But she was no sleeping beauty
And would never allow her strength to be taken
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
One day I will learn to stand proud and tall,
I will see my curves as poetry wrapped in skin
The first thing I notice will be the wild soul within
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
Why did I ever try and change myself at all?
The standard of beauty I try to meet
Is a waste of energy when my value runs more than skin-deep
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
I will learn self-love even if I stumble and fall
From the time of my daughter’s birth
I promise you this
I will make sure that she never forgets her worth
I would have loved you,
In another life, when the time was right
I would have loved you,
Under the cover of the night, when you let down all your walls
I would have loved you,
But in order to love, you have to let yourself fall
I would have loved you,
For it would be the sweetest of connections
But now, my love, I do not seek comfort
I seek an awakening reflection
I would have loved you,
But you chose to love me when I was ready to leave you
I would have loved you,
But now it is time for me to go
I will always love you,
And because of this, I release you, so we both can finally grow
Nothing Is Worth Closing Your Heart Over
There is a fear that keeps me alive
And a fear that keeps me from living
Like a rose that blooms in the night
Out of darkness can come the most beautiful beginnings
The gates of my rib cage are open
Enter my heart anytime
My walls of protection are broken
Through vulnerability I stand in the light
Many tell me to put a lock on my gate
To protect my body’s greatest treasure
And it is true, love can hurt
But I will never close off to pain
For this is life’s greatest pleasure
Show me an honest anger over a dishonest peace. Show me a person honestly accountable for their mistakes over a dishonest perfection. Show me the person who doesn’t claim to have the answers. Show me the person who, instead of saying, “This is the path,” says, “Go inside and discover where your path leads you.” Show me the person who is not afraid to do the ugly cry instead of wear a smile on their face that doesn’t reach their eyes. Honest self-love doesn’t look like a bubble bath or chocolate cake. Honest self-love is when the most human part of us that we feel guilty or ashamed of gets triggered, and we can look ourselves square in the eyes without judgment because our love is not conditional. We can be brave enough to become aware of our own bullshit, so that we can grow into more accepting and loving human beings. I have a lot to learn in this life. If I know something, it is that none of us escapes being human. But an honest human is capable of an honest love.
you’re worth it, I tell you
you’re worth walking that path you are so uncertain of
the path toward what you love and fear most
walk it trembling if you must
but keep placing one foot in front of the other
you’re worth it, I tell you
you’re worth healing
not because you need to be fixed
but so that you can know what it is
to feel free inside once the weight of your pain is gone
you’re worth it, I tell you
you’re worth the kind of love
that forces you to be courageous in your own life
the kind of love that is relentless in its demand
for your most honest and wonderfully weird self
you’re worth it, I tell you
you’re worth following that beating compass in your chest
as it guides you on that path with your name on it
you are the knight on the horse and the hero in the cape you’ve been waiting for
