So let’s go out west and bask in the overcast

And walking through the rain we’ll see the beauty in life again.

DARKEST HOUR, “WITH A THOUSAND WORDS TO SAY BUT ONE”

PRACTICE

THE FIVE REMEMBRANCES

Growing old, getting sick, dying—loss and impermanence are very painful realities, and we have to inter-be with it all. However, if we’re truly honoring the path that brings everything to the table—to the Everything Mind—then it’s up to us to be responsible for our actions. That’s where the Five Remembrances come in. They’re a teaching in the Upajjhatthana Sutta, part of Buddhism’s Pali Canon. It’s something the Buddha suggested practitioners do each morning in an effort to make peace with sicknesses of varying kinds as well as old age and inevitable death (not forgetting that only our relative material selves die, whereas our I AMness, our ultimate ever-present Self, is beyond mortality). Reciting the Five Remembrances each morning in a way that’s truly contemplative—taking to heart what we’re actually saying—can ultimately free us of our worldly longings, which in turn allows us to appreciate life without attachment to it. Yeah, I know that may sound bleak, but I promise you that if you regularly recite these words, you’ll experience deeper insight and freedom. The nature of the teaching of the Five Remembrances is always the same, though the wording of some translations varies. In keeping with the Thich Nhat Hanh theme, here’s his version:

       1.  I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old.

       2.  I am of the nature to have ill-health. There is no way to escape having ill-health.

       3.  I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death.

       4.  All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them.

       5.  My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground on which I stand.1

Working with the Five Remembrances has really helped me make peace with the “darker” side of my Everything Mind. The part where I truly accept that nothing lasts forever and that, with each moment that passes, I’m one moment closer to death. I don’t live my life consumed with thoughts of dying. I do my very best to live each day to the fullest because after all I’ve been through, each day really is a gift. In order to live fully each day, I can’t ignore the darkness or the light, the things that aren’t very pleasant to think about and the things that are.

I love my wife and daughter in a way that I recognize borders on attachment, which Buddhism teaches is a root cause of suffering. If I were to lose either one of them—I don’t have words for how I would feel. My wife and I both have very odd senses of humor and will occasionally joke about how we each want to be the first to die (when we’re older, not any time soon) because we don’t want to suffer the pain of losing the other. We joke about this, but I know there’s truth underlying our playful exchange. The Five Remembrances haven’t magically made me feel like I’d be fine were I to lose my loved ones—they’re not supposed to do that. What they have done is help me to cultivate some semblance of acceptance that death is one of the realities in life, because aversion is futile, and, indeed, my actions are my only true belongings.