Chapter Eight

PARKER

 

Parker couldn’t concentrate on her lesson plans, so instead she was flicking through educational magazines hoping inspiration would strike. She didn’t know why she was letting the situation with the Delaney-Jones family get to her so much. She’d had flings before, and no doubt even had flings with married women before. Until she’d moved schools, she hadn’t anticipated seeing Lily again, and although she’d absolutely loved their night together and thought they had a strong connection, she hadn’t exactly been pining for Lily.

But her reaction to seeing Lily was not her normal response. Seeing Lily had really unsettled her. Whenever she’d imagined running into Lily, it was at the bar or at a party with friends, certainly not at her workplace. Of course, she hadn’t known Lily had a child, so she couldn’t have expected to ever run into her at a school. And now, she was the teacher of Lily’s child, and it turned out that Lily was married. Parker sighed. This was definitely not what she’d pictured when she’d fantasised about the possibility of running into her.

Deciding that it was fruitless trying to work that evening, Parker packed her bag and flicked the television on. She stared mindlessly at that for about an hour, before finally heading to shower before bed. She wondered if a debrief with Nathan would help her get back on track, but she was concerned because he’d basically told her to stop—she was Bodhi’s teacher after all, and he wanted her to be professional. Wise advice, really, given she was five minutes into her new job. It was exactly the same advice she would offer someone in her situation. She didn’t want Nathan thinking she was losing control, particularly after he’d recommended her to the school principal. Both her reputation and his were on the line if she did the wrong thing.

And Nathan wouldn’t expect she would. Pining after a woman was not really standard Parker behaviour, after all. She couldn’t even remember the last time a woman had gotten under her skin like this. She didn’t know if she was reeling because of a connection with Lily and true attraction, or if she was bothered that Lily had lied to her. She had certainly presented as a single woman—albeit a single woman who hadn’t wanted anything more than one night—but she was clearly anything but. No, Mrs Delaney-Jones had really thrown her for six.

She shook her head. She had to focus on this new job. She wanted to impress the principal and connect with the other grade three teacher, Kelly. She wanted to show them they’d made the right choice in hiring her and that she was going to make a positive impact at this school. She’d built a very solid reputation at her last school, with everyone—parents, children, and the school team. She was determined to use her years of experience and natural talent for making a difference to children’s learning to really make an impact. She needed to build her reputation at the new school, and now was not the time to lose focus. She certainly wasn’t going to let some fling with a married woman a year ago interfere with the career she’d worked so hard at.

It wasn’t Bodhi’s fault that his mother had lied to Parker and possibly cheated on her husband. Obviously, they could have an open marriage. Parker would never know what had happened, but she knew she would treat Bodhi just as well as she treated any other child in her class. With love, compassion, and an eagerness to get the best outcomes for the individual child. She just hoped she didn’t have to come across his mother much during the year ahead. Though, she had to admit, the prospect of engaging with his father didn’t really excite her either. How could she have authentic conversations with him about his son’s progress and any needs he might have while knowing she’d seen his wife naked? This was not the ideal scenario at all, but she had to accept it, move on, and put her best in at work, otherwise the job change would have been completely pointless.

Secretly, Parker had ambitions to get into school leadership. She’d built a really good reputation at her last school but was overlooked for leadership opportunities. She felt that starting fresh at a new school, with years of experience behind her, would be beneficial. She believed she would come to the school confident, full of ability, and surprise them in a way she couldn’t do at her old school. She was also attracted by the much shorter commute and the fact that she would be working with Nathan. Although change was always hard, she had known she had to make the big leap. But, after over a decade at one school, it hadn’t been easy to leave. She just kept anticipating the future. She’d thought about her new job for the past few months, but never in her wildest dreams had she imagined teaching the son of a fling!

On Friday, Kelly was in a great mood, and that rubbed off on Parker. They had a fun day with the children and enjoyed cracking jokes together in the staff room at lunch time. Nathan clearly approved of the two of them getting along, joining them when a meeting he had was over. He smiled at Parker, and Parker assumed he was happy to see her in a much lighter mood. “We should go for Friday drinks after work,” he suggested, and Kelly and Parker agreed.

“Let’s have a big night. Let’s go home, get dressed, and do it properly,” Kelly said. “Let’s have dinner then go to the casino to dance.”

Nathan shook his head. “I’m not sure I’m up for a big night. I was thinking more like an after-school cocktail.”

Kelly pouted. “I really feel like dancing. Besides, what else do you have planned this weekend?”

Nathan shrugged. “Nothing, really. I have some washing to do.”

Kelly playfully whacked him. “I feel like we need to do a proper welcome to Parker, and an ‘after-school cocktail’,” she said, using air quotes to emphasise it, “just doesn’t seem like a proper welcome.”

“Fine. Fine! What do you think, Parker?”

Parker shrugged. “I’m not a big night-out person, but this weekend I have absolutely nothing planned. I kept it free specifically because it was the first week back,” she clarified. She didn’t want Kelly thinking she was dull.

“Okay, Kelly, we’re in. As long as we can go to the Palace for a jig too.”

Parker rolled her eyes—trust Nathan to want to go to the gay club. Kelly was excited to go. She said she preferred it to many of the other clubs in town, which seemed to be increasingly typical of gay clubs around the world. Parker saw this as both beneficial—supportive, and nice to have allies—but also challenging to have a space where you feel completely free to meet people. Nevertheless, Parker wasn’t really keen to meet anyone. She’d tried internet dating for a while, and she’d been introduced to people, but no one had really excited her. Until she’d met Lily, that was, but Lily had made it clear she couldn’t have a relationship. Why hadn’t Parker questioned that more? But she knew the answer—she had been so attracted to Lily that it hadn’t mattered at the time.

Hours later, they were at a small Italian bistro sharing a pizza and chugging beer, chatting about the different people at school. “Have you met the PE teacher, Adam? Well, he’s had an affair with a preschool teacher, Donna, but then Donna and her husband got back together, and now you just see Adam shoot longing looks at her whenever she walks past him. Athletics carnivals are a riot.”

“I don’t really believe that. I think it was speculation,” Nathan said. “Besides, I always thought Adam played on my team.”

“Maybe he plays on your team in football or something, but when it comes to dating, he definitely chases women. He’s even flirted with me,” Kelly said. “I reckon I had a chance for about five minutes, but I guess I was too available for his liking. Turns out he likes his women married.”

Parker blushed—that was not how she liked her women, but the comment certainly reminded her of Lily. She craved a sounding board, and Nathan had said her case was closed. She wondered about using the fun evening as an opportunity to get some advice. Kelly seemed the type who would find the conversation fascinating. But Parker had to remember she’d just started at the school, and she wanted to get into a leadership position, so she had to remain professional. Friendly with Kelly, yes, but she didn’t need Kelly sharing this ‘rumour’ on the next girls’ night with another group of teachers. Parker resolved to keep this to discuss with Nathan when they had a moment alone.

“Do you like Adam?” Nathan asked Kelly.

“I used to think he was cute. He has a body to die for,” Kelly quipped. “But the more I get to know him, the more I realise he’s not my type. And now I can’t get him and Donna out of my head anyway.”

Nathan paused. “Yeah, I wouldn’t have picked him as your type.”

“Probably not,” Kelly shrugged. She certainly didn’t seem bothered either way. Parker was beginning to realise that was Kelly’s style. “This pizza is amazing,” Kelly added.

“Yeah, I bet you’re glad you let me talk you into getting the olives on it,” Nathan said, grinning.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but the olives have all been safely peeled off and placed on the side. But the meat, the feta, and the sauce are great.”

“I love it too,” Parker said. “I love the olives and feta cheese with it though. I’m a real Mediterranean girl!”

“So, the plan is casino first and then Palace?”

Everyone nodded, and they started to make their way to the Casino. Kelly had dressed to the nines; in a short satin dress and black heels, she was ready to kick up on the dance floor. Nathan was in skintight jeans and a blue fitted shirt—he looked great. Parker was wearing black jeans and a white linen shirt over a fitted black T-shirt. It was a hot night, but she felt good anyway. If it got too hot, she could always pull off the white shirt. The Casino played 80s music, so Kelly and Nathan made a beeline to the dancefloor.

While they danced, Parker grabbed a beer and enjoyed watching the crowd. She liked to analyse the relationships between groups of friends or people enjoying a date. Family or friends? Were they a long established couple, or was it a first date? Were they friends and had suddenly connected romantically? She’d never know the answer, but she could amuse herself for hours with her natural curiosity for people.

Her desire to people watch and wonder about their stories was exactly what confused her about Lily. Lily hadn’t told her much about herself that evening, but she’d certainly presented as a single woman. And Parker had assumed, incorrectly, that she didn’t have a child. In her experience, most parents generally brought up their children in conversation. Didn’t they? Parker and Lily had discussed what she did for a living, for example, although, in hindsight, she didn’t think Lily told her about her work. Parker couldn’t believe she didn’t ask more questions. Her natural fascination for people’s stories meant that she was curious about Lily. That, and the fact that she was a gorgeous woman Parker was incredibly attracted to.

She needed a distraction, so she made a pact to herself. She would talk to the first woman to catch her eye that evening. Scanning the room, she hoped someone would appeal so she could at least give it a go. She was willing to try anything. The song that was playing ended, and Kelly and Nathan came over to Parker.

“I’m pooped,” Kelly said, then added, “We should go to the Palace soon. A group of school mums just walked in.” She pointed her head towards the left to indicate where the women were.

“Oh, seriously, not grade three mums I hope?” Nathan whined. Parker wasn’t too concerned because she was so new to the school anyway, but she figured they’d move on to the Palace where school mums were unlikely to be.

“Actually, they are grade three mums,” Kelly said, groaning. “Bianca, Amber.” She squinted through the crowd. “Lily and Caroline. Bloody hell.”

At Lily’s name, Parker and Nathan both turned and peered through the crowd. Parker caught sight of Lily, who was standing in a fitted, purple dress, with a light, black cardigan over the top. Her long, dark hair was tied back in a tight ponytail, a look Parker hadn’t seen on her before. She looked amazing. Realising she was the first woman to catch her eye, Parker wondered if she had to stick to her pact to talk to her. Why not? “Maybe I’ll go say hello.”

Kelly shook her head and stage whispered to Nathan. “I don’t think Parker understands the efforts we go to to avoid school mums in the real world.”

Nathan stage whispered back. “True. Maybe Parker is trying to make the ‘old’ teachers look bad as they hide from the school parents. Maybe it’s a gleaming ‘new’ teacher thing to do.”

Parker chuckled. “I’m just trying to get to know them all. Their kids are all in my class, aren’t they?” She actually had no idea, but she had to justify why she wanted to say hello. And Nathan knew the real reason, anyway, so it was all for Kelly’s benefit.

“You don’t have Amber’s kid in your class. He’s in my class,” Kelly said, “but the others are all yours. Amber’s son, Christopher, we’re trialling separating from his friends. I get the joy of him! And I’d prefer to avoid Amber as much as I can.” Kelly smiled good-naturedly. “But you go say hi. You’ll earn some brownie points.”

“Actually, we can escape, meet you at the Palace?” Nathan fixed his eyes on Parker.

“Great idea,” Kelly enthused. She was definitely keen not to ruin her night off with school business. Parker agreed it made sense and then made a beeline for the group.

“Oh, Parker!” Bianca said as she noticed her. “Everyone, this is Parker, the grade three teacher.” Bianca was clearly the parent ringleader. She was the president of the P&C Committee and seemed to know everything that was going on in the school. She’d spent quite a lot of time talking to Parker already.

“Hey, I just wanted to come and say hello. I saw you all from over there.”

“Are you here with friends?”

“I was, but they’ve gone. I’ll meet up with them later,” she said. “They’ve just gone somewhere else.” She didn’t want to tell them she’d been out with other teachers who’d rushed off to a gay bar when they saw school mums. She was concerned that might give Bianca a heart attack, judging by how uptight she appeared. Lily smiled at her, and Parker was unsettled once again. How was it that one smile from that woman was enough to throw her off course? Parker couldn’t look away from her, although she had every warning bell whirring in her head to back away, head to the Palace, and forget about Mrs Lily Delaney-Jones.

“Big night?” Lily focused her question on Parker.

Parker shook her head. “I really hope not. Grade three has worn me out this week, but it will entirely depend on my friends. Anyway, I hope you have a lovely night. I better be off.”

The group of mothers nodded, and Lily turned to the group. “I might just head to the loo, maybe get some fresh air too.” Everyone carried on chatting like it was no big deal, but Parker wondered what she was playing at. Surely she wasn’t using a trip to the bathroom as an excuse to talk to her. Parker didn’t dare hope. So far Lily hadn’t even acknowledged she remembered Parker, though she clearly did. Sure enough, as Parker walked toward the door of the club, Lily followed.

“Parker,” she said, “I just wanted to say hi.”

Parker nodded. “Hi.” The mood was awkward between them.

“We didn’t get a chance to talk the other day with Scott and Bodhi there,” Lily started, and Parker frowned. She wondered how Lily was going to tackle this. “I just wanted to say it was a surprise to see you at the school. I didn’t expect that.”

“I didn’t expect it either. I didn’t even know you were a mum.”

Lily nodded. “Sorry about all of that. I really just wanted to check in and see if we were cool with each other, given you’re teaching my son.” Lily looked nervous as she spoke, and Parker nodded coolly.

“Of course, we’re cool. I’m your son’s teacher, and nothing will interfere with my professionalism.” She smiled at Lily to reassure her a little.

“Thanks, but you don’t need to be just professional. Hopefully, we can be friendly too.”

Parker gave Lily a small smile. “Sure.” Inside she felt like screaming at Lily, asking her for an explanation, but ultimately Lily didn’t owe her that. She returned to the professional teacher talking to school mother role and said, “I hope Bodhi is enjoying grade three so far.”

“Oh, he’s loving it. He thinks you’re awesome.” Lily’s eyes twinkled. “I had really wanted Mr Stenlake for Bodhi this year.” She looked a bit bashful as she spoke. “Nathan. But I think Bodhi couldn’t be any more thrilled with the teacher he got. Nathan—he’s your friend, isn’t he?” The penny had just dropped for Lily. “The one you were out with that night we met?”

Parker smiled. “The one and only. Actually, I’m out with him now, but please don’t tell the other school mothers. Nathan and Kelly made a quick exit and I’d like to too!”

Lily made a gesture of zipping her lips. “Kelly Williams?”

“Yeah, I’ve only just met her, but I’ve known Nathan for years.”

“Is Nathan the reason you moved schools?”

“Nathan, the commute, needing a fresh start. It was just time for me. Of all the schools in Canberra…” She shrugged and laughed and Lily shared an amused smile with her.

“I better get back to my friends. You have a good night, hey?”

Parker smiled. No matter how frustrated and confused she was about the situation, there was something that still warmed her to Lily. She was nice to be around, and Parker felt drawn to her. She decided her mantra around Lily needed to be “professionalism”. Plus, she had no idea what her status was—traditional marriage, open marriage, or what? Either way, she wasn’t going to get involved. She was going to steer clear of Lily. That was all she could control.

“Yeah, you too” was all Parker said. Then she left and walked toward the Palace, reeling from their exchange. Lily had admitted she remembered their evening together, so that was a bonus, but she still had a husband, didn’t she?

The rest of the evening was a blur. Kelly was fun to be around, and she was easy to get along with, but Parker secretly hoped that now they were working as a trio wouldn’t stop their ‘bestie’ evenings out. The conversation flowed differently with Kelly around. Still fun, but different. A little more reserved, a little more polite. Parker would absolutely do it again, though—that wasn’t in question. She was having fun.

Every time the conversation lulled, or Nathan and Kelly got engrossed in something, Parker’s mind would wander. What was Lily thinking after their exchange? Would she end up back at the Palace that evening? Parker had deliberately not told her they were going to the Palace—not because she didn’t want to see her again, but because Nathan and Kelly had made it very clear they were in hiding from the school mums. She hadn’t wanted Lily to return to her friends and they make a beeline toward the very place the teachers were using as their hideout.

Besides, a gay bar is a kind of sacred space, and although straight people—women in particular—go there all the time for the good music, atmosphere, and the lack of sleezy men hitting on straight women, it wasn’t Parker’s place to out Nathan. Nathan wasn’t really closeted at work, but he wasn’t out either. Parker was sure that if he was asked directly, he’d answer, but otherwise he’d likely avoid any questions. “Do you have a wife?” or “Are you married?” would probably be answered with “No” rather than “No, I’m gay.” Parker assumed everyone could read that she was gay just by looking at her, so never felt closeted in any way. It was always more surprising to her when someone—usually a little old lady—asked her about her husband or anything else to imply she’d been read in any way other than gay. Hell, some women even looked twice at her in a women’s bathroom!

As the evening wrapped up, the trio made plans to do it again some time. “Soon,” Kelly had insisted, and Parker could tell she’d be the type of person who would hold her to it. “See you Monday,” they all said, as they farewelled one another.