Kenny met him on the stoop of the apartment in North Ironbound, hands in his pockets, head down. No amount of fucking around with his face could disguise the discomfort there. Although the guy had only lived in the apartment until he was four, and probably had few memories of the place before he was taken away, Ben guessed it was some kind of animal instinct, the kind that made newborn puppies hate the owner who kicked their mother, even when it happened while they were still in the womb. Kenny probably knew he’d been beaten here. That he’d been locked in closets here. That once their smack-headed mother fell asleep on top of a newborn Kenny and almost asphyxiated him. Even Ben himself only knew those things from the care reports he’d been handed for his new charge when he got custody of the kid. This place had messed them both up in different ways, Ben first, and then Kenny after Ben had been taken into care. Whoever Kenny’s father was, he’d probably conceived him here, the way Ben’s had, their lives mere mistakes Marissa Haig was too lazy to go and get righted. They were no better than cavities that, by the time she’d awakened to their seriousness, had grown too large to fix.
But Kenny’s trepidation was tied to other things, too, Ben knew. His tone on the phone. His whole request that Kenny meet him here.
“What the fuck is this about?” Kenny was shuffling his feet, his tone whiny. “Why here, man?”
Ben didn’t say anything. Just unlocked the door and let them in. Across the street, a pair of cops in a squad car had stopped to talk to someone on the corner, and the lead cop had his elbow out the window, laughing. There was heavy rap music playing from the apartment above them, and Ben could hear that it was disguising a fight as effectively as sunglasses disguised fractured eye sockets.
He went to the corner of the first room and peeled up the carpet, lifted the cut boards until he’d laid five planks on the floor. He tried not to look hurried, like he was keeping one eye on his phone for a news report about a firefighter wanted in the city, any information welcomed, pictures of him and his car online. The guy Newler had to get out of the trunk of that car eventually. Ben had grand hopes he’d knocked him out cold, might have bought himself a couple of hours, but after the fight in East Orange he hadn’t been at his best. There was a lot to do, and he didn’t want to spook Kenny any further by cluing him in to that. Ben slipped into the hole and onto the compacted dirt. The hole was only waist deep. He slid the first duffel bag over, hefted it up, then climbed out. Kenny was standing there in his Hugo Boss looking like somebody just died.
And Ben supposed that wasn’t far from the truth. Someone was breathing their last breaths right in front of Kenny. The brother he thought he knew. Ben unzipped the bag and jostled the bundles of cash inside. Kenny stared at the money for a long time, then lifted his eyes slowly, taking Ben in, all the way up to his eyes, probably wondering who the hell he was even staring at now. Ben gave him a minute. He wanted his head to be semi-clear. In the apartment above them, something smashed against a wall and a woman screamed.
“Benji,” Kenny said. “What the fuuuu…”
“This is what I need you to do,” Ben said. “You don’t have to remember it all. I’ve written it down. But I’m going to run you through it now, just in case you have any questions.”
“Benji. Benji. What—”
“You’re going to take the money,” Ben said. “There are five more bags. You’re going to take them back to your home. On the way, you’re gonna stop by a Walmart or a Target or whatever. At the store, you’re going to buy a full set of clothes. Shirt, pants, jacket, underwear, socks—everything. Shoes, Kenny. Okay? You’re gonna buy new shoes.”
“Why?”
“Take your watch off, take your jewelry off.” Ben stared at the money, trying to remember. Because if he missed anything, it was all for nothing. Everything he’d done. Andy had sewn a goddamn tracker into the tongue of one of his sneakers. Who knew what other tricks she had. “You go home, you get changed into the new clothes, you take the money back out again. In the same bags. Do not take your phone with you. Do not take your own car.”
“Why are you telling me all this?”
“Because this is my stash, Kenny,” Ben said. He watched his brother. “I built this for you.”
They looked at the money together. Ben guessed there had to be two million in the bag. Kenny had tears in his eyes. Ben figured the guy probably stood right where he was, looking right how he was, three decades earlier. Crying about something. Dried snot in his nose. Ben hadn’t been there, then. He’d been in the system somewhere, no idea that Kenny was even alive and treading that horrible path behind him. If only he’d known. Ben felt his nose sting and shook it off, because he’d never cried in front of his brother and never would.
“You’re going to take the money and hide it somewhere nobody would ever expect you to,” Ben said. “Do you understand me, Kenny? Put it in the last place anyone would think you’d go.”
“But I don’t need this, Benji.” He gestured to the money. “I mean, I’ve got my own money. I-I-I-I’m not—”
“But you might have needed it,” Ben said. “Or one day, your kids might. I might have, or my kids might. I did this for both of us, Kenny. For our family line. We were never going to be worthless fucking junkies again, any of us. I started doing this a long time ago, when I found out about you. When I found out she’d done it again. I promised myself it was never, ever going to happen to another one of us.”
“Jesus, Benji, what have you been doing?”
“It doesn’t matter now.” Ben shook his head. “I just need you to understand. You have to protect this money, Ken. Because if you don’t, it’ll all have been for nothing.”
“Is this because of Luna?” Kenny gestured to the money. “Did she— Is this her money?”
“No,” Ben said. “It’s mine.”
“But you’re not … crooked.” Kenny’s wet eyes searched his. “You’re not a…”
“Yes, I am.”
Kenny hitched a breath. Somebody beat on a door above them, told the fighting couple to shut the fuck up.
“The police are not gonna find Luna and Gabe,” Ben said. “I gave away everything I had, all of this, so that they could find them. But they’re not going to. And now I’ve got to get out, while I still can. I’ve got a chunk for myself to get me set up somewhere. And I’ve got one more job to do, to make sure we’re all set up, the whole crew, before we have to split.”
Kenny gave a sad groan. For the first time, Ben saw his brother in there beneath the too-perfect face. The hands that reached for him were Kenny’s hands. Ben hugged his brother, squeezed him, thumped his back.
“I’ll call you,” Ben lied. “Don’t worry.”