What do you want from me? Renner’s raw tone saturates my memory, making a tingle zip along my spine.
I want to know the truth of who he is. I want to know what he’s doing on this ship. I want to know if he’ll out me to the Verse. I want to…stars, I want to kiss him again.
Talshina! The mental reprimand sounds a lot like Doyua’s voice. As my childhood nurse, she could always stop my sister and me with the mere whisper of our names. I channel that power now over my unruly emotions.
Bon lets out another cry as we approach the view port to her stall. She’s crumpled to the ground, one foot at an unnatural angle, and my hand goes to my throat in horror. The poor creature.
“Good. You made it.” Maxon leaves the stall where Sover is trying to assess the damage to the dreyhass’s leg.
A dreyhass has four legs and a long, reptilian tail, but their front legs are by far more muscular, holding up a large upper body. Bon’s back leg is the injured one, but the weight of her body is such that she will need to be in a sling for Sover to do any lasting good.
“Do you think you can…do anything?” Maxon asks.
The compassion he has for the creature is obvious. He hates seeing any animal in pain, but I also know what he’s asking. Can I lift Bon for long enough for the sling to be fitted?
I close my eyes, hyperaware that Maxon and Renner are both staring at me, and reach out to sense Bon’s mass. I don’t use my ability on principle, even though Freyda constantly tells me I must practice as if the mere act of using Gravless power won’t out me to the rest of the crew and the galaxy in turn. But now I think I know what she’s getting at.
Bon feels immense in my mind. I know she weighs over two thousand kilos, and it’s as if I’m physically trying to lift that much, not alter her gravity. I’m already exhausted from the mental strain of the performance and then holding that soldier’s pistol up for as long as I did. Perhaps I should do as Freyda says and practice more.
Focus.
I grind my teeth and try again, but a sharp pain sears my mind, and I trip forward with the shock of it.
“Talie, are you all right?” Strong hands grasp my shoulders. Renner’s sudden presence is both comforting and alarming.
“Yes. I’m fine.” I step away but can’t bear to look at Maxon or his disappointment. “I—I can’t.”
“It’s all right.” He looks back to the cage, worrying his bottom lip.
“I think I’ve got an idea.”
We look at Renner who turns to Maxon. “Will you go in there and help Bon stay calm?”
Maxon looks to me as if for permission, so I nod, and he rushes to the door.
“Oh, and hold on to something,” Renner calls after him. “I’m going to try something.”
With a slight frown, Maxon enters the cage, and the door slides closed. We watch through the view port as Maxon positions himself at Bon’s head, holding on to a support strap while Sover does the same.
Renner rushes to the room panel. He taps a few buttons then presses the intercom. “Here we go.”
“What are—” The gravity in the pen disappears, and they all begin to float. Bon lets out a low moan, but she’s focused on Maxon’s calming voice.
“What did you do?” I ask.
“I turned on the Zero Grav for this pen. I wasn’t sure if each pen was isolated, but they are. You’re not the only one with abilities.” He winks, and I move to lean against the view port.
Why didn’t I think of this? It will be much easier to control Sover’s gravity for a limited time.
“Sover, be ready,” I call out over the intercom.
I immediately focus the last of my remaining strength on the doctor’s regained gravity, and he goes to work outfitting the large animal with the sling. Bon must know she’s being helped because she remains very still while he works.
Sover rushes with the last clasp, his white, wispy hair floating about in the zero grav, but my hands start to shake. Then my arms. Then my legs. I force every ounce of energy to focus on Sover.
“Talie?” Renner is at my side again.
“I’m fine,” I gasp.
“Right.” He rushes to the intercom. “You almost done, doc?”
Sover nods and then steps back from the animal.
Renner is at the control panel the next instant, and gravity returns to the room. I drop my hands, breathing deeply, but Bon only makes a small sound as the sling supports her weight.
Maxon comes out and nods at us. “Quick thinking, Fly Boy.” Renner grimaces at the nickname but shrugs as if it was no big deal. “And thanks, Talie. Sover will get her fixed up, and she’ll be fine in no time.”
He moves off to the other stalls, and I turn to make sure everything still looks good when a wave of sheer exhaustion wracks my body.
“Well, that was exciting,” Renner says.
Blackness clouds my vision, and my limbs go limp, like they’re being sucked to the floor.
“Talie?” My name leaves his lips, and I lose strength. Renner is there in a breath, catching me with the reflexes of a trained royal soldier. “If I’d known saving a dreyhass was all it took for you to fall for me…”
I can’t laugh, but my lips twitch.
“Let’s get you somewhere safe.” He lifts me, holding me against him in the solid, warm strength of his arms.
I want to protest, but my eyes won’t open. My exhaustion is complete. It’s like I expended every ounce of strength my body has, but my mind is still whirring. Cool air rushes across my skin, but it still smells like musty hay and animal sweat.
“Hey now, don’t fall asleep on our first date,” he says.
Somewhere nearby, a door swooshes open.
“I can’t be that boring,” he teases.
I only manage a grunt.
He lays me gently on a stiff bed. It’s uncomfortable, nothing like my cushioned mattress, but it smells like…Renner. The warm, dusk mint scent envelops me, and I can’t help the contented sigh I make.
Then I force my eyes open. “You took me…to,” I search the bare gray walls, “your room?”
“Don’t worry, Le’è, I won’t tell anyone you’ve been in my bed.” His grin is wicked. “I am nothing if not a gentleman.”
I huff, and it’s part laugh, part air.
“You doubt my integrity?” He feigns shock.
I want to say something snide, but even if I could speak again, I wouldn’t. Realization washes over me. I don’t doubt him. Yes, he’s lied to me, I don’t know how many times, but so far, he’s managed to do the right thing. Whether that was standing up to protect me or helping an injured animal. I do have to overlook the potential kidnapping when we first met, but since then, he’s done everything in his power to help me.
“Now what’s that look for?” He bends a little closer.
His presence kicks my pulse up, and I wonder if he can see it pounding in my neck. My earlier thoughts resurface, and my gaze flickers to his lips before I look away.
He’s off limits. I must hold to my duty. I am promised to the man the court will choose for me.
But slowly, as if we’re caught in a time distortion, he reaches out and brushes a lock of my hair from my forehead. His fingers burn a trail across my skin like the tail chasing a meteor. I want to take his hand and hold it, draw it to me, but I’m paralyzed, not only by my body but by my future position. As if sensing this, he pulls back.
Resignation floods through me. This is the story of my life. Cutting off all connections out of necessity. Hiding my heart for the sake of my galaxy. Denying my ability, my very existence, out of obedience.
When I look back, there’s something unspoken in Renner’s gaze. Regret? Understanding?
“I’ll let you rest.” He stands and backs away from the bed.
I want to protest. His presence is calming, but even if I had the strength, I can’t voice my true thoughts. Distance is better.
He pauses at the door. “I’ll be right outside. You’re safe. Rest.”
Then he bows slightly, a sight that churns my insides, and he’s gone.
He leaves behind his scent and twisting emotions I don’t have the strength to untangle. My eyes close, and I’m lost to exhaustion.