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“Can’t sleep?”
Belle groaned and rolled out of bed. “My mind is running a marathon.” After cleaning out her apartment and ending the lease on top of going to work, she needed a vacation. Pronto. Hell, if she got one, her brain probably wouldn’t shut down long enough for her to enjoy it.
“We both do, babe, but how do you expect to rest with the bedside light on?”
Benji’s round, ceramic lamp set on her salvaged nightstand. Shouldn’t the dim light soothe her headache? Maybe it would if her damn stomach stopped twisting.
With Alan and her girlfriends helping over the past couple of days, they had saved more of her belongings than she thought possible. Her surviving dishes and food now stocked the kitchen, and her clothes filled half of Benji’s walk-in closet.
Thank God the monster had only slashed three dresses and two blouses to ribbons.
Though she could’ve kept her headboard, box springs, and mattress as long as she flipped the latter upside down, she’d sold them to a neighbor.
Booyah! She was a hundred dollars richer. Belle snorted and hugged a new teddy bear as she stared out the window. The full moon illuminated the snowy trees and bushes in the fenced-in backyard, and if not for her apartment fiasco, she would’ve dragged Benji outside to play.
He wrapped his arms around her from behind.
She gripped his forearms as his warm breath fanned her ear. The words in her heart constricted her throat. She rubbed her aching chest and turned in the circle of his embrace. Shadows darkened his face, but she pinpointed each line and dimple. His blue eyes and dark-red hair jump-started her heart and coiled heat in her veins. What would she do without him?
“I gotta tell you something, Benji.” She trailed her fingers down his T-shirt and picked off a stray cat hair. “I should’ve said this before I gave up my apartment just in case you didn’t feel the same, but I’ve been so frustrated and stressed out of my freakin’ gourd. I just—God, I can’t keep it in anymore.”
“Babe, stop rambling. What’s going on?”
“I love you.” As his eyes widened, she placed her finger on his lips. “My heart pitter-patters every time you walk into the room. The clock at work ticks by so damn slow when I’m desperate to kiss you. After the break-in, I would’ve dropped money on a bet that you’d go overboard and try to cage me like I was an injured little bird, but you’ve given me equal space and attention. Thank you.”
He smiled and teased his fingers down her back.
“I want our little girl to grow up in a home full of love, laughter, and music. I want you to show her how to change a flat tire. Hell, I need to learn that as well.” Her cheeks warmed as he chuckled. She set the teddy on a bookshelf and flattened her hands on her belly. “I expected to raise this baby alone, and I was so shocked and scared. But you swooped in and changed everything. I’ve fallen head over heels in love with you. Tell me the truth, even if you don’t feel the same. I need to—”
Benji cupped her chin and kissed her.
Yes! She wrapped her arms around him and breathed in the minty air escaping his mouth.
“My sweet, wonderful, stubborn Belle,” he purred the words while feathering kisses over her face. He smiled back at her. “I’ve waited a long time to hear that. I love you too. Why else would I ask you to marry me?”
“Out of obligation?”
“That was never the reason. From the moment we met, I was awestruck. You were special, are special. When I realized how deeply I could fall for you, I ran away, but here we are together as we should be. Loving you is easy. It was just a matter of time before you fell for me too.”
Was she dreaming? He loved her? She pressed her hand to her mouth, muffling her cry, and leapt back into his arms. His strength and heat enveloped her. She nuzzled the thick column of his neck as his soft hair brushed her cheek and raised goosebumps. “Benji, wait. We need to get everything out in the open.” She pushed on his shoulders.
“I’m all for revelations, but make love to me now. We’ll talk more later.”
Belle pressed on his chest as he leaned down for a kiss. “I’ve made my decision about the record deal.”
“Way to kill the mood.” He straightened and pursed his lips. “Let me go first. A state-wide tour isn’t doable for me. I could teach Ollie how to run the store, cut paychecks, and order supplies, but I don’t want to leave that responsibility to him or anyone else. I trust him, but I would constantly worry about him accidentally running the business into the ground.”
“I’d worry about embezzlement.”
He snorted. “So many what if scenarios have raced through my mind. What if you hit the big time? Will you need to move to Los Angeles or Hollywood? What will I do about the business then?” He wiped his hands on his jeans and heaved out a long breath. “Your voice and the way you play a mean guitar could rocket you to stardom. I truly believe it, and I don’t want to stand in your way. I’d never forgive myself. My garage is just a building—nothing compared to you. We can manage a long-distance relationship for a while, but if you need to move to California, I’ll sell the shop and open a new one wherever we go.”
Shock slammed into her. No, he couldn’t be serious. “You’d do that?”
“Yes. I will do anything to make our relationship work.”
Tears stung her eyes. “The clientele wouldn’t be the same. Don’t you know many of your customers by name?”
Benji nodded. “People trust me to treat them and their vehicles right, but it’s fine. I can start over.”
“No. You shouldn’t give up everything you and your father have worked for.”
“I’ll do anything to make you happy. As long as you stay indie, we’ll live in Denver, and you’ll travel when needed. If you go big, we’ll move. I can do that.”
“I can’t.” His sacrifice awed her, but how could she live her dream while he lost his? What kind of person would that make her?
“Why? I haven’t come to this decision lightly.”
“You’re the sweetest man I’ve ever met.” She brushed tears from her face. “I want what’s best for our daughter. She deserves better than a mother who’s always on the road.”
“A few months a year isn’t that long, not in the grand scheme of things.”
“Maybe not, but it’s still too long for me. Besides, I don’t want to be trapped under the demands of the music industry. You’re already busy at the garage. If we move and you have to rebuild the business, you wouldn’t have time for our child. Neither of us would.” She tugged on the hem of her sweater. “How could we expect her to grow up normal when we’re never around?”
“We’ll figure it out later.”
“No, we’ll figure it out now.” Belle swiped her hand between them. “I won’t sign the contract. I’ve always enjoyed the club and bar scene, even though it pays crap money. I’ve dreamed of better, but I was a fool. I have it so great. Maybe I have a shot at stardom, even semi-stardom, but I don’t want it. With big business comes conformity.”
“What do you mean?”
“Even indie labels try to control their musicians. I could lose my freedom and my voice if I signed with someone who didn’t understand me. Simon’s offer looks great on paper, but I’ll be missing so much of my daughter’s life.” Her chest shuddered as she hiccuped. “I wouldn’t take her with me. I couldn’t do that to you.”
Air whizzed through his nostrils. “Are you sure? We could work around the problems—”
“I’m one hundred and eleven percent positive. My peers and fans will probably think I’m crazy, but I don’t care.” She rubbed her stomach. “I talked to June yesterday. She accepted Dowsey’s contract. Since she and her family don’t have strong ties to Denver, they’re able to pack up and go on tour without a problem. Her husband is going to home-school the kids.”
“I hope it works out for them.”
“As do I.” She smiled, the weight lifting from her chest. “I won’t leave my man or daughter behind for any reason, but your willingness to try means everything to me.”
The fine lines crimping his eyes and mouth smoothed out. “Thank you. I would’ve done whatever you needed, but I really didn’t want you to accept the offer as it was.”
“I know, and I didn’t let your opinion sway mine. I’m refusing the contract because I want to.” His evergreen scent surrounded her as they hugged. “I’m lucky I found you, Benji. I love you. I’ll call Simon tomorrow.”
“You could always get another offer in the future. Maybe things will be different then.”
“My mind won’t change. I want to see my daughter grow up, and I definitely can’t wait for gray hair to sprout from your head.”
“Our little girl’s gonna make me worry, huh?”
“Probably. I worried my parents half to death. Karma’s a bitch.”
He chuckled. “Will you marry me?”
“Yes, love. I’ve turned you down so many times that I planned to ask you. A man’s pride can only take so much rejection.” She playfully pinched his arm as his face bloomed red. “I guess you need to get me a ring.”
“Yep, I’ll get it.” He stepped back.
“You already have one?”
“Of course. I’m not gonna ask you to marry me without a ring.” He hurried to his dresser and pulled a small velvet pouch from the top drawer. “We may have to get it resized. My mother had tiny fingers.”
Belle gasped. “You’re giving me your mom’s ring?”
He returned to her side and dumped the contents of the pouch into his hand.
“Good God. That rock rivals Alcatraz.”
“Damn right. It’s two carats.” Benji bent on one knee and held up the gold ring as the light reflected off the Princess-cut diamond. “Mom never cared about jewelry. She wanted love and happiness, but Dad believed any woman who claimed not to like jewelry was full of shit.”
She chuckled. Tears streaked her cheeks. Oh my god. I’m getting engaged!
“Anyway, Mom wanted him to return it and buy her something sensible. He considered it since she was so upset over the price—a diamond this size surely cost a small fortune—but he scrapped the idea after she went into another room and giggled like a schoolgirl.”
The wry amusement filling his voice set off butterflies in her stomach.
“After she passed, Dad took the ring to a pawnshop but couldn’t hock it. Mom loved it so much, loved him so much, so he gave it to me on his deathbed. He told me to buckle down and find a woman to love, someone sassy and worthy of this ring, but I couldn’t find anyone until you. It’s yours if you’ll take me for your husband.”
“That’s a beautiful story.” Belle wrapped her hand over his, enclosing the ring between them. “I agree with your mom. Jewelry isn’t important, but the meaning of the ring is.”
“And I agree with my dad. You’re full of it.”
She laughed again. “Well, that ring is gorgeous. I won’t say no to it.”
He slipped the ring onto her finger, but it lodged around her knuckle. “Damn. I’ll take it to a jewelry shop. It should be cleaned anyway.”
Belle lifted her hand and smiled at the lopsided ring. “What happened to the band?”
“Dad buried it with my mom. It was nothing fancy.”
She pulled off the ring, slid it onto her pinky finger, and pouted. “Too loose.”
“Do you have a chain or plain necklace?” Benji rose to his feet.
“Maybe.” Belle hurried to her freshly sanded and varnished dresser—thank you, Benji!—and rifled through several necklaces, bracelets, and earrings in her jewelry box. There! She pulled out a thin gold chain, strung it through the ring, and handed it to Benji. “Will you do the honors?” She turned and lifted her hair in a sloppy hold.
The graze of his fingers prickled the fine hair on her nape as he hooked the chain around her neck. The ring dangled a few inches from the valley of her breasts and warmed her skin. His kisses caressed her, fanning the fire sizzling in her veins. She moaned. God, she ached.
“Turn, babe. I need your mouth.”
His husky voice tightened her nipples. Oh, yes. She pivoted and jerked him close. His mouth seized hers in a hungry, desperate kiss. She backed him up against the bed and moaned as they tumbled backward in a mass of twisted limbs.
He clasped her waist and thrust his hips against her thigh.
She burst into a fit of laughter. “This is wild.” She popped his shoulder, pushing up.
“What’s wild?” He rolled away and scooted to the headboard. “Why are you laughing, babe? Shouldn’t you be stripping me naked?”
Belle chuckled harder. “We’re engaged. I never—” Her laughter suddenly morphed into sobs. Tears welled as her chest clenched. Seriously? Where was her control? After dragging in a deep, shuddering breath, she blinked back the waterworks and cuddled beside him. “Sorry. Stupid hormones. I’m just so happy.”
“Me too.” He kissed her head. “We should get married before the baby’s born.”
Love, marriage, family—this was her fantasy. After losing so many boyfriends to crazy work hours, incompatible hobbies, or a conniving bimbo, she’d finally found a supportive, honest, and loyal man. Perhaps she should pinch herself, but she never wanted to wake if this was a dream.
“How about in the spring, April or May? I’m sure I could find a dress even though I’ll be the size of a whale.”
“Spring works. Big wedding or small?”
“Small. I thrive on attention when I’m singing, but I’m self-conscious without a guitar in my hands. I’d likely pee the dress if a hundred-plus people watched me walk down the aisle.”
An alarm pierced the air.
Belle shot up from Benji’s chest. “What the hell is that?”
He leapt to his feet and grabbed the ringing phone from the nightstand. “What?” His knuckles whitened around the receiver. “Yeah, the code is 0708. And no, I didn’t trip my damn alarm.” He sighed as the noise shut off. “Fine, you do that.” He slammed the phone back on the base before stomping into the closet. His voice carried. “Someone broke in downstairs. The lady from my security company is calling the cops.” He darted to his dresser, holding a shotgun, and grabbed a box of shells from a drawer.
She stiffened. “You have a gun.”
Benji loaded the shells and strode to the door. “Stay here.”
“Wait.” She hurried after him but stopped short as he held out his hand.
“If it’s safe, I’ll call you down. Please, wait here. For the baby.” He quickly kissed her and rushed from the room.
She cursed and drummed her hands on her belly, counting the seconds. A minute stretched endlessly. How she hated the you’re-a-pregnant-woman card. The pasta she’d eaten for dinner threatened to return. Yuck. She swallowed the sour taste of bile and stomped from one wall to the other. If someone planned to hurt her man, they better watch out. No way in hell would she lose her fiancé on the night of their engagement.
Belle crept from the room and halfway down the stairs. Hinges squeaked from somewhere below her. She flattened her back against the wall as the hammering pulse in her neck beat in her ears.
Benji’s red hair popped into view between the slats in the stairway banister.
She relaxed. Pent-up air rushed from her mouth. Whew. He was okay.
“Belle? Goddamn it.” Benji scowled at her from beyond the slats.
Busted! She descended the steps. “Can it, macho man. Is anyone here?”
“Damn obstinate woman.” He muttered a few more choice words and shook his head. “Someone jimmied the front door open, but the alarm scared him off. We’re alone.”
She shivered and scowled at the now-closed door as though she could lay all her problems at its feet. “A robber?”
“It’s probably the same person who ransacked your apartment. I’ve lived here for fifteen years, and nothing bad has ever happened. It’s too much of a coincidence I get my first break-in after what happened to you.”
“I’m sorry.” Shit. This was her fault. She fingered the engagement ring.
“Never be sorry. He probably spied on us at your apartment and followed us here. None of this is your fault.” Benji hugged her.
She gripped him close. No one read her mind as he could.
He stepped back as sirens wailed in the distance. “Better put the gun away. Don’t want the cops to think I’m the trespasser and shoot on sight.” He grasped her elbow and pulled her up the stairs. As she eyed the weapon, he unloaded the shells back into the box. “It was my dad’s. I’ve never used it outside a firing range.” He stored the shotgun on the top shelf in the closet.
“You need to get a gun cabinet with a lock before the baby is born.”
“I will. C’mon. Let’s wait downstairs.”