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T
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“Hey Ms. Girl.”
After my morning run, John and I agreed to have Sunday brunch at Donna’s on Charles Street since we hadn’t seen each other since the gallery opening. I had been busy with painting, the exhibit, and thinking about Jasmine. John was busy doing his thing, and that changed from hour to hour.
“Hey Mr. Man, how are you?” I said, greeting him with a hug. We decided to sit outside to enjoy the sunshine.
“I’m wonderful!” John beamed.
“What have you been up to, or should I say who’s been up against you, that’s making you smile like that?”
“Guuuurrrllll, I’ve been keeping company with THE most wonderful man.”
“Oh really!” I was curious about who could make my friend come alive like this. “And where did you meet him?”
“At your gallery opening.”
“At my gallery opening? When did you have time to meet someone in between selling paintings and running interference?”
“Are you doubting my skills?” he asked rolling his neck. “You know your baby boy got skills.”
“I know you got skills. I’m just saying, we were busy.”
“Well, it didn’t stop you from catching a few looks, not to mention Ms. Thing you left with.”
“Boy please.”
“Boy please nothin’, so what’s up? Ya’ll hook up?” John asked.
“We’ve hung out a few times.” I said, trying not to sound too excited.
“I didn’t ask if ya’ll hung out, I asked you if you hooked up?” he inquired, with a crooked smile.
“No, ain’t that type of party,” I responded kind of nonchalantly.
“T, please. Who you think you talkin’ to? It’s always that type of party with you.”
“She’s different,” I told John, not able to conceal my smile.
“Different?” John asked skeptically.
“Yeah, different,” I blushed.
“Different how?”
“Different like she’s making me rethink priorities, life.”
“And you haven’t slept with her yet?”
“Nope.”
“You losing your skills?” John said, folding his arms and rolling his neck with the corner of his mouth turned up.
“No, don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I haven’t thought about it. But that’s not the prevalent mood when we’re together.”
“So what is the ‘prevalent mood’?” John questioned while making goofy air quotation gestures with his hands.
“We talk, I mean talk, it’s a two-way dialog. And I’m not afraid of opening up nor do I feel like I’m playing some game. It’s just her and me talking about life, enjoying each other’s company, sunsets, birds singing. You know, things you know are there but don’t acknowledge very often. She makes me notice things. She makes colors brighter, and she brings calm...peace, you know.”
“Damn! Maybe I should date her or nominate her for sainthood or some shit.”
“John,” I said, hitting him in the arm, “I’m being serious, like I said, she’s different.”
“I guess so. Anybody that makes Ms. T rethink life has got to be some kinda special.”
“She is. You know after Imani broke up with me when we were in undergrad, I sort of swore off of long-term relationships.”
“Sort of? T, you did a one eighty. Girl was wrong on so many levels for how she chose to disappear and then had the audacity with a capital ‘A’ to emerge two weeks later on someone else’s arm. All while you were trying to finish your final project and graduate.”
“Yeah.” This unintended trip down memory lane cast a solemn shadow over me.
“To this day if I see that bit-...”
“Hey!” I interrupted my friend. “She was wrong, but calling her out her name isn’t necessary.” Why I felt the need to defend a person who sullied my relationship expectations, I didn’t know. John ignored me.
“To this day if Ms. Imani crosses my path, I might catch a case. You may not remember how pitiful and sad you were when she left—” Of course I did, how could I forget feeling like my heart and lungs were failing me and making it impossible to breathe? John’s hands flailed about as he continued. “You invested a lot of time and energy trying to make that thing work for three years. In between your art projects and research papers, you worked part time to afford food to weave all of your low-country love into home-cooked meals. You courted and loved her—hard—and what did she extend to you in return?”
“I know, I know, you are not a fan.”
“I most certainly am not. Your friends—me included—had to take care of you for weeks cause you couldn’t get it together. It took you a long time to recover and I’m not sure you have completely. Hell, you had to stay in school an extra semester.” John sucked his teeth, in case I hadn’t realized he was thoroughly irritated. I changed the subject back to him and his recent pursuit.
***
On my way home, I decided to call Jasmine, which was becoming a pleasant part of my routine and I needed some positive energy. “Hey Ms. Lady Ma’am,” I said, happy that she had answered the phone.
“Hey yourself,” she sounded like she just woke up.
“How are you on a fine Sunday? Up for a drive?”
“I wish I could, but today’s not a good day.”
My ears perked up, “What’s wrong?”
Jasmine started crying. God bless! This has been a day! “Why didn’t you tell me about the pictures? Why would you display pictures of me without asking my permission or at least telling me?” The next few questions were unintelligible due to her crying and sniffling.
“Jasmine what happened?”
“She’s angry with me...we started fighting...the dog bit her!
“Whoa Jasmine, what in the hell is going on? Some woman hit you?”
“Not exactly, I’m okay, but I can’t talk right now,” Jasmine said sadly, “I gotta go,” and hung up.
Damn! What in the hell was going on? I realized I didn’t even know where Jasmine lived, not that I would go charging over there if I did. I also now knew for sure that there was a “her.” But I refused to believe Jasmine was with someone who would hurt her. Could this be my fault? I wanted to take Jasmine to the mall and surprise her with the exhibit. Apparently, somebody else saw it first. Damn! This was not good. Not good at all. I was feeling helpless and awful. I tried calling Jasmine’s number again but got her voice mail.
“Jasmine, please call me. I’m worried about you. I’m sorry if I caused confusion; that was not my intention. I was planning to surprise you today and take you to the mall. Let me know if there’s something I can do to make this right. I, I, um. I’ll talk to you later.” What was the hesitation with the last line? Ugh! I was at a loss for words. This was not how I had intended to spend the day.
***
“You should have told me.” Jasmine started after agreeing to meet me at Federal Hill to talk face-to-face later that day.
“I know, I wanted it to be a surprise—it all happened so fast. My principal told me about available display space at Owings Mills, I pulled together some photos fairly quickly one night and submitted the application. I thought it would be fun. In hindsight, not so much. I screwed up.”
“Surprise, surprise!” Jasmine said sarcastically. “You still should have told me—my life feels like it is upside down right now.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had a girlfriend,” I said defensively.
“That’s irrelevant, don’t you think I have a right to know when my image is being used, particularly in such a public place?” Jasmine asked, still very much upset and seemingly confused.
“Yes. Yes, you do, and I’m so so sorry but I think the fact that you have a girlfriend is absolutely relevant, I certainly wouldn’t have used those pictures. Why haven’t you talked about her?” I asked. “Jasmine, I asked a couple of times about your situation,” I reminded her.
“Don’t change the subject. This is not about Toni—this is about you.”
“So, she has a name, and how long have you and Toni been together?”
“Teresa, I told you, this isn’t about her.”
“Jasmine, I’m not some irresponsible, insensitive person that sets out to hurt people. I wouldn’t have used them in the exhibit if I knew about your girlfriend. That’s why Toni is relevant. The fact that you’ve managed to not answer questions up until this point directly acknowledging a significant other existed is, in my mind, quite telling,” I said getting slightly annoyed that Jasmine wasn’t owning her part of this situation.
“She hasn’t been significant for quite some time,” Jasmine said under her breath.
“But she’s still your girlfriend, yes?”
“Yes,” Jasmine said with a sigh. “Yes she is, which makes this all the more complicated.”
“Makes what all the more complicated?” I too was starting to get confused, not sure if Jasmine was talking about Toni or the exhibit situation.
“THIS! Us, Teresa,” Jasmine exclaimed quite prophetically.
“Us?” I said, the corner of my mouth turned up a bit at the revelation that I wasn’t losing my mind thinking there was something developing between us.
“Yes, us,” Jasmine said biting her bottom lip and smiling back, slightly, but smiling nonetheless.