The next day Seth again insisted on being her human shield as they went to feed the fawn. Thor, shut in the barn for the night, raced toward them as soon as he saw the bottle.
She laughed. “Look at that. He knows where the food comes from.”
They didn’t have to urge him to take the nipple. He grabbed it and pulled eagerly.
She held the bottle, discovering satisfaction and peace in feeding the little animal and in seeing how it had lost its fear of her. Fear. The word covered so many things. She wanted to put her thoughts into words if she could. “I know that fear is a good thing in that it keeps us from danger. But fear can harm, too.”
He quirked an eyebrow questioningly.
“Like Thor’s fear of us. If he didn’t get over it he might have starved to death.”
Seth’s gaze went slowly to Thor as if he needed to consider her statement.
“I think our experience with fear has been at opposite ends of the spectrum,” she said.
He again brought his gaze to her, full of dark intensity that brushed a tender spot within. She ached to be able to help him leave his fears behind.
She went on to answer his unspoken question. “You lost Frank and Sarah because they didn’t heed the fear of thin ice. But I stood by helpless and useless because my fear crippled me.”
He nodded. “That’s true. But I hope we are together, united with fear about this Englishman who has followed you.”
She couldn’t look away from his gaze. Couldn’t escape his silent demand. United. The word pulled at her heart strings, threatening to undo her resolve. She must not allow his concern and her fear to drive her back to the person she’d been when Oliver was shot.
She nodded. “I will never again let fear control me, though.”
He narrowed his eyes. “I was hoping for more cooperation than that.”
She gave a little shrug. “I will only promise not to ignore danger signs.”
“I guess that will have to be good enough.”
She didn’t bother to ask what else he wanted. She didn’t object to him being her self-appointed bodyguard but she would not become a whimpering, simpering female afraid to stand up and protect herself should the need arise.
Grady raced into the barn. “Did he eat already?”
“He just finished.” Jayne showed him the empty bottle. “He’s a greedy little thing.”
“Aww. I hoped you’d let me help feed him.”
Seth ruffled his hair. “Maybe next time. Thor seems to be comfortable enough with people now.”
As if to prove it, Thor bumped his head into Grady’s hand then watched, his legs splayed awkwardly. When Grady reached out to pat his head the fawn bounced away a few feet and paused to wait for Grady.
Grady trotted after him but Thor bounced away.
“I think he wants to play tag,” Seth said.
The pair chased up and down the alleyway. Grady paused at the door. “Can we go outside and play?”
Jayne waited, wondering what Seth would say.
“I don’t think you should right now. Let’s make sure Thor knows where home is first. We wouldn’t want him to get lost.”
Grady nodded. “Sure wouldn’t.” He continued playing with the fawn as Seth and Jayne watched.
Jayne liked Seth’s answer. It was wise and thoughtful. And not based on fear.
They returned to the house for breakfast. Afterward, Linette turned to Jayne. “Would you be able to help me preserve the beans today?”
Jayne recognized it as Linette’s way of making sure she stayed indoors and hid a smile at the way Seth sighed.
“Sure, I’d love to assist you.”
Two hours later she realized how much work was involved. They packed beans into jars, added salt and water and put them in a boiler.
“Now they boil for three hours,” Linette said. “Which gives us time to get another lot ready to go.”
“How did you learn all this?” It was Linette’s first summer on the ranch.
“Cookie taught me. When I came west it was with the idea of being a pioneer wife. I was determined to do all the practical things I thought a woman should do. Eddie would pay a housekeeper if I wanted one but I don’t.”
The heat from the stove, combined with the growing heat from the August sun made the kitchen like an oven. Jayne wiped her forehead with a corner of the big apron Linette had lent her. How could Linette work so hard despite the heat and her growing belly?
Jayne glanced out the window. Seth sat on horseback, on a hill overlooking the house.
Linette joined her. “He’s concerned about that Englishman.” She gave Jayne a sideways hug. “And you.”
Jayne didn’t answer. She could hardly deny it when Seth made it obvious but she wasn’t sure what it meant. In a secret place behind her heart she wished it meant he cared about her, and not just because he had an overwhelming sense of responsibility to prevent bad things from happening.
Burying a sigh, she returned to the large tub of beans. “This will take all day.” Sweat dripped down her back.
Linette chuckled. “I expect it will but we’ll really appreciate it when winter comes. Let’s be grateful that Cookie is doing half of them.”
Jayne stole another glance out the window. Seth had moved. Her heart slammed against her ribs. Where was he? Who watched to make sure the Englishman didn’t come near the ranch?
She crossed the kitchen and stepped out the door to scan the surrounding area. There he was. Seth and horse stood in the shadow of the trees near where he and Jayne had spent many hours on shooting lessons. Her breath eased out smooth and warm. She should have known he wouldn’t forget about her.
Why did the knowledge feel so good and right when it was not what either of them wanted?
Did he watch her? It was impossible to tell at this distance but somehow she knew he would have seen her step outside. She ducked back into the kitchen before he could ride down and order her to stay indoors.
She hummed a little as she turned back to preparing beans. The Englishman posed no threat so long as Seth stood guard.
Not until dinnertime did she see Seth except at a distance. He came in at Eddie’s side, pausing at the door to take a look across the yard.
The men protested the heat in the kitchen.
Mercy entered and gasped. “How can you bear this?” She fanned herself.
Sybil did likewise.
“Would you like to take your food outside to the shade?” Linette said.
One glance at Linette’s flushed, damp face and Jayne thought it would be wise. The heat bothered her though she’d never once complained.
“I’d like to,” she replied.
Seth pulled her back when she started for the door. “It’s not safe.”
“Linette is about to perish in this heat. She needs a break.” She kept her voice low.
“Let her go outside. But you need to stay here.”
The others took their plates outside.
Jayne looked into Seth’s eyes, saw stubbornness and caution. Or was it fear? He’d deny it and likely be offended if she suggested so. Was his fear good or not? Was it making him too cautious? How should she respond?
“How likely is it that he’d try and harm me with half a dozen people around?” The question was rhetorical.
“You can never be too safe.”
“But you can worry too much.” She filled her plate. “Come on. I’m sure I can sit somewhere that is safe enough.”
He grabbed a plate, flung food on it and tromped after her. He waited until she sat with her back to the wall then sat facing her, his bent knees almost touching hers.
She pursed her lips. Did he have to be so obvious that he thought her in danger? Certainly made it difficult to relax and enjoy her meal. Every time she bent her head over her plate she felt exposed and spent most of the meal scanning the trees and hills around the house, hoping and praying she wouldn’t see that man.
Seth bolted to his feet and stared down the road. “Rider coming.”
Eddie had also risen.
Jayne’s heart clattered up her throat and clung to her teeth.
Seth pulled her to her feet and unceremoniously rushed her inside.
She would have protested except his breathing was harsh, his concern obviously genuine. A fact that caused her heart to hammer even more rapidly until her head spun.
The others entered more slowly.
“Whoever it may be, he is riding directly to the house.” Eddie moved through to the front door. “Doesn’t look like an Englishman to me.”
Seth practically glued himself to Jayne’s side. She clung to his arm. When he draped his arm across her shoulder and pulled her close she relaxed marginally. She couldn’t be much safer.
“It’s Constable Allen,” Eddie called and he went through to the front door.
Everyone in the room let out a gust of air. None louder than Jayne, unless it was Seth.
“Come on in.” Eddie led the man to the kitchen. Beside him stood a Mountie with a yellow stripe on his midnight-blue breeches. Rather than the red serge jacket she’d seen the Mounties at Fort Macleod wearing, he wore a brown canvas tunic. He pulled off his broad-brimmed felt hat and tucked it under his arm.
Eddie made introductions. “You’ve come about the murderer we saw?”
“Suspected murderer. And yes, I have. Who is the witness?”
“My sister, Jayne.”
She had eased away from Seth’s side at the announcement of the Mountie’s arrival and now stepped forward. “Me.”
“I need to ask you some questions. Can we...” He looked about at the crowd.
At least Grady had run to play so he didn’t see and hear this.
“You’re welcome to use the front room,” Linette offered, pointing down the hall.
“That would be fine. Thank you.”
Eddie led the way. Jayne followed, the Mountie on her heels. Not until she reached the other room did she see with relief that Seth had also followed.
The Mountie waited for Jayne to be seated then pulled out a little notebook. “Now tell me exactly what happened.”
She swallowed hard, gripped her hands together and wished Seth sat at her side instead of across the room beside Eddie.
“I don’t know how much you know...”
“Pretend I know nothing. Start at the beginning.”
Where was the beginning? When Oliver had gambled so often? When he’d found his gambling more interesting than her company? She gave herself a mental shake. The Mountie meant the shooting.
“I was with my fiancé, Oliver Spencer, walking down a street in London, when this man came from an alley.” She went on to describe the scene, leaving nothing out, not even her own fear and shame, nor the horrendous amount of blood.
“What can you tell me about the man who shot your fiancé?”
“He was just an ordinary businessman. Suit, bowler hat, white shirt.”
“His hair color?”
She shook her head. “I can’t remember.”
“Think of the scene. Search every detail. Did his hair show under his hat or not?”
She closed her eyes. “It showed. Kind of dirty blond.”
“Good. Eye color? Take your time.”
She closed her eyes and brought up the scene she had tried so hard to erase from her memory. “Hard. Beady. Blue, I think.”
“How tall? Picture him with your fiancé. Was he taller, shorter?”
“Shorter, and Oliver wasn’t a tall man.”
“Build?”
They went through a number of details.
“Now can you think of anything odd, unusual? A scar. A limp. A birthmark, say on his face or hands. A ring.”
“He had a ring. On his right hand.”
“What did it look like?”
“A lion’s head with emerald eyes.”
“Very good. I think I have enough to find this man and send him back to England to face his crime.” The Mountie closed his notebook and stuffed it back in the breast pocket of his vest and stood. “I’ll check back in a few days with news.”
Jayne’s eyes widened in surprise. The man certainly seemed to think he’d capture the murderer in no time. He didn’t appear to entertain a shadow of doubt.
Eddie showed the Mountie to the door.
“I suppose he means he’ll be back with good news.” Her voice felt weak as if she’d spent all her energy and she certainly felt that way. “He sounds mighty sure of himself.”
“The Mounties always get their man,” Seth said with assurance.
A burst of nervous energy jolted her to her feet. “I have to get out of here.” Avoiding Seth’s outstretched arm, she raced for her room, grabbed the brocade bag where she carried her gun and headed for the door.
Seth blocked her path. “What are you doing?”
“I can’t stand being cooped up. I’m going to practice shooting.”
He crossed his arms and refused to let her pass. “It’s not safe.”
“I’ve got a gun.”
“That doesn’t insure safety.”
“And isn’t the Mountie out there looking for the man?”
He shook his head. “It’s a big country.”
Linette drew to her side. “I think you should listen to him.”
She felt the others watching her and tossed her hands in a gesture of defeat. “You all expect me to stay inside forever?”
“Yes,” they chorused.
Except Seth. “Only until the Mountie gets his man.” He gave a slow, lazy grin that melted right through her annoyance and restlessness.
She sighed and gave in. “Very well. But I warn you. I expect to be entertained.” She glanced around at the group. Mercy looked away. Sybil was suddenly very interested in washing a pot. Linette indicated the shrinking mound of beans.
“There’s always canning to do.”
Jayne brought her gaze back to Seth’s. He looked amused as he leaned against the door frame.
“You,” she said as she leaned close. “You will keep me company seeing as you insisted I stay indoors.”
He shrugged but his eyes smiled, full of promise. “I can handle it.”
Mercy chortled but when Jayne scowled at her, she only gave an unrepentant grin.
Jayne tried to remain upset but she couldn’t and laughed. “I want you all to realize that you are so controlling.”
“Yes,” Seth said, taking her elbow and leading her to the table. “But it’s for your own good.” He sat across from her and helped finish the beans.
The last batch of jars went in the boiler midafternoon. Linette splashed cold water over her face and neck. “Do you mind watching the boiler while I have a little nap?”
“Of course not,” Jayne said. “Take as long as you like.”
“There’s really nothing to do. It’s three hours before it’s done.”
“Go.” She gave her sister-in-law a little shove toward the stairs.
Mercy and Sybil had left an hour ago. Only Seth and Jayne remained. She gave him a long, considering look.
“What?” He seemed oblivious.
“This is where you’re supposed to ask me what I’d like to do.”
“Nope. I don’t think so. You’ll probably suggest things you shouldn’t do.”
“Like what?” She was curious what he thought she’d suggest.
“Like maybe going shooting. Or walking up the hill.”
Her cheeks warmed as she remembered their previous walk up the hill. How she’d kissed him eagerly, only to have him apologize. Nope, she didn’t care to repeat that. Though perhaps if they changed the ending...
“Shucks. You might even suggest a trip to town.”
She tapped her finger on her chin. “All very good ideas. I suggest you keep them in mind. But I already agreed I would stay indoors until the Mountie catches the man—supposing he does.”
His eyes followed the movement of her finger. She purposely drew it along her jawline and back to her chin to watch his eyes move along with her finger.
What was wrong with her? Her life was in mortal danger and she played silly games.
She jerked her hand to her waist and cleared her throat. “Actually, what I had in mind was a game of checkers.”
“Sure.” Did he sound relieved? Had he been entertaining thoughts similar to hers?
Not likely. She put her unusual response down to nervousness at the threat of the Englishman. Her thoughts settled. She pulled the checkers game from the cupboard and put the board on a side table in the front room. The spot allowed them both a view from the window. She knew he wouldn’t be happy unless he could see out.
He scanned the scene beyond the glass as she set up the game pieces.
“Ladies first.”
She moved. “Eddie and I played checkers and chess by the hour when we were younger.” She sat back and mused. “So much has happened that it seems like a long time ago.”
Her entire life had been slashed into two segments—life before Oliver’s murder and life after.
Although there were enjoyable parts to the first half—like games with Eddie, tea parties with sisters Bess and Anne and certainly, the lessons under a good tutor—she would never return to who she was at that time.
Aware that Seth waited for her to take her turn at the game, she pulled her attention back to the here and now.
There might be present dangers that frightened her but she would never let them control her as she had when Oliver was shot.
Seth tapped the back of her hand. “What are you thinking?”
“About the past.”
“All of it?” He sounded amazed.
“And the present,” she added, bringing her gaze to him, silent and challenging. Did she want him to have a place in her present?
Only if he acknowledged her growing strength. Not that she minded him providing an extra pair of eyes while Oliver’s murderer lurked about, but he had to understand that she wanted to prove she could take care of herself.