CHAPTER 3
Nicole
September 1667, Approaching the Docks in Quebec City
These will be my friends and neighbors. Nicole surveyed the docks as she gripped the rail of the gangplank on her way down from the loathsome ship. She scanned the faces of the dozens of settlers eager to catch a glimpse of the prospective brides, anxious to find a glimmer of kindness among them. How long will it be before I’m so starved for new society and a taste of home that I clamor to the docks to see the next arrival of passengers with the rest of them?
Distracted, her boot caught a ridge on the gangplank and she gathered herself just before she toppled into Elisabeth. Steady your nerves, you dolt, Nicole chastised herself. There’s no need to make a fool of yourself before they even know your name. The solid ground felt foreign beneath her feet as she stepped onto the dock. After three months, she wasn’t sure she trusted it to remain firm. Nicole squeezed Rose’s hand as she saw that Rose dried her tears on a grimy handkerchief. Only ten of the women would stay in Quebec City, the others bound for Ville-Marie or Trois-Rivières. Though the old crone of a chaperone had been too ill to spend any amount of time with them, she had decided on the town assignments without consulting the ladies themselves, nor would she brook any arguments to the list. Because of this, Rose bid Geneviève a tearful farewell as the latter was destined for Ville-Marie. Though incensed that the chaperone separated Rose from Geneviève, Nicole was elated that she was to remain with Rose and Elisabeth in Quebec, at least until they were married.
At the dock, near the throng of settlers, the governor, the bishop, and a handful of other officials waited on a platform to greet each of the ladies who would stay in Quebec City. Nicole mustered a stiff curtsy and a vague smile for the men dressed in finery as impressive as she’d ever seen in the grandest parts of Rouen. Satins, silks, brocades, and even starched lace. She looked down at her tattered woolen skirt and patched jacket and wished for a moment that she had allowed her mother to make her some new things for the journey. She had refused, wanting them to save every denier for new fields, but she couldn’t help but feel shabby next to these important men.
You came here to ease the burden on Papa and Maman, to give the little ones a chance, not for yourself. Nicole cast her eyes down, knowing that wasn’t the complete truth. The afternoon in April when Father Augustine found her in the churchyard, sobbing, she was not thinking of her family. When he offered her a place on the ship, she didn’t accept out of selflessness. She was thinking of her own broken heart as she stood, moments before, in the back of the church as she watched Jean Galet, her Jean, pledge himself to another woman not three weeks after he was supposed to marry Nicole. Her broken heart, her embarrassment. Not her family’s improved lot with one fewer stomach to fill. Not the dying fields that lay beyond her father’s front door.
She knew it was stupid to give one’s heart to a man before marriage . Too many hours distracted by his roguish brown curls and wicked dimples. Too many hours congratulating myself on my good fortune to find such a match meant too many hours of anguish when it all came to nothing.
Chin up and eyes forward, Nicole told herself, summoning the words her father, Thomas, had said almost four months prior as she entered the Rouen Cathedral to meet her shipmates. It was his motto, and Nicole decided it was high time she adopted it as her own.
The governor cleared his throat, preparing to offer a formal welcome to the brides, but a tall nun—a contradiction of a woman, with a lined face and a youthful step—silenced him.
“My good sir, I should like to see the ladies out of the cold air and settled in the convent as soon as may be. They are exhausted from their voyage and not used to the climes here. We would be honored to welcome you at any time if you wish to greet the girls properly.”
The bishop opened his mouth, looking as if he wished to object, but glanced to the governor already bidding the ladies a cheerful farewell, and stayed his tongue.
Nicole blessed the woman as she claimed her spot in the open wagon. The Ursulines lived not far from the docks, so it was less than a half hour before Nicole and the others found themselves in the convent common room, warming themselves before a well-fed fire as the dozen or so nuns of the order introduced themselves. Nicole had thought the Sisters would find the arrival of ten energetic young women a disruption to their staid and solemn lifestyle, but they seemed all too happy to welcome their guests, even if it meant their solitude was shattered like a china cup on a stone floor.
Upstairs, the girls were allowed to choose from the rooms appointed to their use, and Rose and Elisabeth claimed a cozy room with Nicole. The wooden floors looked sturdy and not given to drafts. The beds were draped with sensible green canvas curtains and warm, clean bedding. More comfortable than her own tiny bedroom in her father’s farmhouse, to be sure. Their trunks appeared before long, but the emptying of their finery into the armoire was the task of minutes.
Following the others’ example, Nicole shrugged off her shoes and slid under the warm covers of her new bed. She relaxed every muscle in her body, sinking into the soft mattress. Her eyes welled up with tears of gratitude. Never again will I cross that damned ocean. Come what may, this place is my home and I will make the best of it.
Nicole smiled throughout the meal and answered questions with a polite expression, but the weight of fatigue still hung heavy on her, despite the short nap. Her eyes felt rough, as though her lids were lined with sand. Every muscle felt sore and overused—reeling from the lack of rock and sway on the solid stone floor. The beef stew and warm bread was the most appetizing thing she’d seen since embarking the ship, perhaps months before then, if she was honest with herself, but after the first few mouthfuls, she couldn’t force any more down, sure her papa and maman would not be eating so well that night.
“I understand from your parish priest that you have an impressive education,” Sister Anne, a plump nun with a sweet face, said to Nicole. As all their priests sent along letters to the Ursulines, the bit of information did not surprise Nicole, even if being the subject of correspondence between her confessor and a stranger was more than a bit off-putting.
“My mother was brought up in a convent, Sister,” Nicole explained. “She taught us all to read, write, and do some simple figuring.”
“A solid foundation, my dear,” the nun replied. “We must be sure to find you a young man with some wit about him.”
Nicole nodded, not giving much thought to the prospect. The thought of “husband” and “Jean Galet” was still too synonymous for her to think of anyone else.
All around, the Sisters questioned the young ladies about their lives in France, just as Sister Anne questioned her. Not just a method of getting to know their new housemates, but a tool for matchmaking, Nicole realized. The apple tart before her lost all appeal and she pushed it to the side where it was soon claimed by one of the other girls. Despite the lectures that laid the expectations plainly before the King’s wards, Nicole had managed before now to shove the reality from her mind. They were to marry, and to do so as soon as they were able.
“My dear ladies, if I might claim your attention for a few moments before you seek out your beds?” The eldest of the nuns, the one who had interceded at the dock, stood at the head of Nicole’s table. “I am Sister Mathilde and will be responsible for your welfare while you are with us. We are so pleased to welcome you to our little convent and hope your time here will be enjoyable and profitable.”
Not an eye in the room wavered from the old woman’s face. Her voice was as sure as her step, and confidence emanated from her in equal measure with kindness of spirit.
“While you are here, we hope you will voice any deficiencies you might have in your domestic education. If you have little skill in the kitchen, you will find yourself before a stove more often than you might like. If you cannot sew, we expect to see you with needle in hand for at least an hour each day. Likewise, we expect you to share your talents for the benefit of your shipmates and the order while you are here.”
Nicole looked to Elisabeth, who harbored a small smile on her lips. Elisabeth’s talents were obvious. At least Maman sent me with her favorite knitting needles, Nicole thought. Blankets and scarves won’t come amiss with winter so near.
“We want you all to take advantage of your time afield, for many of you will settle quite far from here. You may well find yourself at quite some distance from any neighbor who is able to instruct you, nor will it be likely that she—or you—will have the time to spare. And, ladies, I cannot caution you enough, make your choice of husband carefully. You will have your pick, I assure you, but not all the men are equally deserving. Above all, you must ask any prospective suitor if he has built upon his land. We don’t want to see you with less-than-adequate lodging in the midst of one of our winters. You are here to keep houses, but not clear the land for them.”
Sister Mathilde continued her speech for a few more moments, but Nicole felt it impossible to focus on her words. Within days, the single men of the settlement would descend on the convent, each vying for the attentions of the ladies, hoping to secure a bride. Nicole had a vision of a cattle auction where the group of farmers schemed to purchase prized stock for their herd. Looking for wide hips and straight teeth in his future bride as he would look for a rounded rump and strong legs in a dairy cow? Dinner churned in her stomach, and Nicole suspected it had very little to do with the richness of the food.
They retreated upstairs to their room after the speech, Nicole happy to leave the chatter of the group behind. She changed into her nightdress and all but launched herself into bed. Nicole’s affection for her decadent mattress grew with each moment she wallowed in it.
“Isn’t it exciting?” Elisabeth asked, straightening her bedcovers. “To think our arrival is such an important event? That the settlers are so anxious to meet us all?”
“Nerve-racking, more like,” Nicole said, pulling up her blanket. “What if we choose poorly?”
“We must take our time and be prudent, that’s all,” Elisabeth answered, stretching before climbing into her own bed.
“Spoken with such confidence,” Rose said with a chortle as she placed her skirt in her trunk. “I suppose you did a fine job selecting from all your suitors in Paris.”
“Ha ha.” Elisabeth lobbed a pillow at Rose’s head. “I was too busy working to bother with suitors. Though I can assure you, I rejected my one offer with great enthusiasm. I can tell you, you’ll know the bottom of the barrel when you see it. If you need any help, I’ll be sure to point them out for you.”
Rose laughed, but Nicole couldn’t summon it.
“Cheer up,” Elisabeth said, peering over at Nicole from her bed. “What’s bothering you?”
“I’ve never in my life made such a decision without my parents,” Nicole said. “Papa arranged the match between myself and Jean. I’m sure we’d have been terribly happy . . . if there’d been money at least.”
She didn’t tell them how much she’d cared for him. How much she was certain he cared for her. Even though the match was arranged, she’d rejoiced in her father’s choice.
“The Sisters will guide us, I’m sure,” Rose said. “They don’t want to see us settled in misery. You heard Sister Mathilde. We’re the ‘mothers of New France’ and a valuable resource.”
The image of the cattle auction resurfaced in Nicole’s mind and did not settle her troubled thoughts. Not for the first time since she’d left France, Jean Galet’s face came to mind. The sweetness of his dimples, the mischief in his greenish-blue eyes. Will any of those young men clamoring for brides be as kind as you, Jean? Will any of them make me as happy as you would have done?
Nicole choked back her tears, but had far less success with her doubts.
A week after their arrival, the benches and podiums of the town hall gave way to a bower of autumn leaves and a refreshment table to welcome the new ladies and their prospective suitors. A group of younger men played melodies on their well-worn instruments off to the side. Though they did not play well, the tunes were lively, which inspired the conversation to be likewise. None danced, however, for the clergy did not approve. The Sisters watched the proceedings with the attentiveness of hawks on the hunt, ensuring any lapse in decorum was rooted out on the spot.
Nicole lurked toward the edge of the gathering, sipping from a cup of cider, taking stock of the assembly. Rose, having grown up in society, was undaunted by the reception and chatted with a rather tall man with a weak chin. She seemed attentive, but Nicole could not tell if it was due to politeness or genuine interest. An impressive skill, but not something one learns on a farm milking cows. Elisabeth, too, bore a sweet smile as she conversed with two eager men. Nicole imagined at Elisabeth’s father’s side in the bakery was as good a place to learn conversation as any ballroom.
Be brave, Nicole told herself. The men seem no different from those at home. Smile. Seem friendly. They will come to you. She took a deep breath and placed the cup on the table. She stepped out of the shadows and affixed a smile that she hoped appeared sincere. Within moments, a gangly man in his twenties bowed before her.
“Alphonse Quentin,” the man said by way of introduction.
“Nicole Deschamps,” she replied, pleased that no warble of her voice betrayed her nerves.
“Your hair is the color of warm chestnuts,” he said, staring at his feet.
“I—I thank you?” Nicole stammered. Was that meant to be a compliment?
“I grow some of the finest oats to be seen in the settlement,” the man said, appearing to summon some confidence.
“That’s . . . wonderful for you,” Nicole said.
“My dear Mademoiselle Deschamps.” Sister Mathilde swooped in, taking Nicole by the arm. “I have need of you. I’m sure Monsieur Quentin will forgive me.”
Quentin nodded, but his face betrayed his disappointment. Though he might not forgive Sister Mathilde’s intrusion, he would never dare to voice it.
A few yards away, the old woman leaned into Nicole. “Alphonse Quentin is a good man, but a simple one. A girl with any schooling at all would be wasted on him. I’ve a much better plan for you.”
Nicole found herself standing before a man who looked about as happy to attend a social event as he would his own hanging. He stood a good six inches taller than Nicole and cut a striking figure. His features looked chiseled from marble, but the fringe of jet-black curls that framed his face did marvels to soften his statuesque visage. Nicole could tell his stormy gray eyes were assessing her, but his conclusions remained a mystery.
“Monsieur Alexandre Lefebvre, may I present Mademoiselle Nicole Deschamps of Rouen,” Sister Mathilde said, pushing Nicole forward. “I thought you two should get better acquainted.”
Monsieur Lefebvre nodded. Sister Mathilde whisked away to another part of the hall, leaving Nicole alone with the man. She looked to her friends, but saw no polite means of escape.
“Good evening,” Nicole said, after an awkward moment.
“Good evening,” Lefebvre echoed, arching his brow.
Was I too bold in speaking first? Nicole looked at her shoes, praying the floor would swallow her whole.
“So you are from Rouen,” Lefebvre said. “I assume your father has passed. That seems the usual tale.”
“Very near Rouen, monsieur,” Nicole said. “But my father lives. He has a farm outside of the city.”
Lefebvre paused with his mug of cider half raised to his lips. “Indeed. Then how did he allow you to come here?”
“Our land was depleted. I had no dowry.” Nicole willed that words of her family would not trigger the tears that seemed forever pressing behind her eyes. “I preferred to leave than to be a burden.”
“He would have done better to keep you in France.” Lefebvre’s voice, for reasons unknown to Nicole, seemed laced with acid.
“You do not like New France, then?” Nicole wondered what on earth could inspire such venom.
“It is no place for women,” Lefebvre said. “A desolate place. The King is a fool for risking your lives to build his colonies.”
“If I may be so bold,” Nicole asked, “why are you here, monsieur, if you find this place distasteful?” She grew weary of this man’s scornful tone. Hard enough to accept her new life, without a stranger telling her that she’d made a dreadful mistake.
“The lot of a second son, mademoiselle,” Lefebvre replied. He offered a barely perceivable nod and left without another word.
Though she had no particular reason to heed this stranger, Nicole felt somehow wounded by his slight. She admitted an appreciation for Lefebvre’s poise and comportment. He seemed more refined than the men in the Norman countryside, and made Nicole feel somehow backward and crude.
Quite the introduction to society, Nicole thought. A simpleton and a man too presumptuous and arrogant by half. Why can’t I find a man with Jean’s sweetness and quick wit? Jean’s boyish face and brown curls flashed in her memory, and she knew she could not depend upon herself to keep the tears at bay.
She sought out her cloak and left the reception, hoping no one noticed her departure. The bitter wind blew, as always, but the snowfall was light and Nicole could see the convent from the town hall even through the falling snow.
“What on earth are you doing out here?” a male voice yelled.
Nicole turned to see Lefebvre, who must have left the gathering just before she did, untying his massive sorrel horse. Lefebvre’s eyes blazed with intensity as though she had done him a great offense.
“Going home, monsieur.” Nicole pulled her cloak tighter but did not slow her pace.
“You should know better than to go out in a storm alone,” Lefebvre said. “This is not France; the winter here is not to be taken lightly.”
“Thank you for your concern, monsieur, but I think I can find my way fifty yards in light snow,” Nicole replied.
“Don’t trifle with the weather, girl,” Lefebvre said. “A light snow can turn into a blizzard in moments.”
Nicole bit back a reply and set out toward the convent. Though tempted to engage the infuriating man in a shouting match, she held her tongue and left him behind. She reached the convent without incident, but sought the warmth of the fire as soon as she crossed the threshold. She wondered if she would ever adjust to the perpetual cold.
She took the least austere of the chairs and pulled it close to the crackling flames, enjoying the warmth as she watched the figures in the blaze. It was a game she had played with her mother as a girl. Some people looked for sheep or rabbits in the wispy clouds, but she sought out the kittens frolicking in the dancing fire.
But her plans of a solitary end to her evening ended when Sister Mathilde entered the room to see which woman had returned so early.
“You are back already, child?” Sister Mathilde claimed the seat by the roaring fire next to Nicole’s, a cup of warm cider in hand for each of them.
“I have enjoyed my share of company, Sister.” Nicole sat back down on the spindly chair in front of the fireplace. “I see you came back early as well.”
“The younger women of my order can supervise once things are underway,” Sister Mathilde said, savoring a sip from her cup. “I weary too easily now, to spend the late hours away from my convent. I noticed Alexandre Lefebvre showed you his usual charm.”
“You saw?” Nicole was embarrassed that the conversation had not been more private.
The Sister nodded. “I hoped you might soften him a bit. Poor man.”
Sister Mathilde looked into her cup. She seemed tempted to say more, but kept her thoughts to herself.
“Do not be discouraged, my dear,” Sister Mathilde said. “Some women find their matches almost at once, others take time. You seem one of the latter variety. Nothing wrong with that. You’ll be tempted before long.”
“I hope you’re right, Sister.” Nicole looked back at the fire and sipped the warm cider. Something that tastes of home, at least.
“Tell me, child, are you unhappy here?” Sister Mathilde asked.
“No, Sister, not exactly.” It was the truth. Nicole didn’t dislike anything about the colony in particular—except, perhaps, the cold. “I miss my family a great deal, though.”
“As a good girl should,” Sister Mathilde said. “Just remember, your place is here and you must make the best of it. You will find contentment here, my dear, and perhaps even happiness, but you must allow yourself to find it.”
In other words, Nicole thought, chin up and eyes forward.