By the end of the week, I was feeling like myself again. I could summon without even thinking about it, and my fingers sparked when I thought about sparring. On Thursday night, I even attempted a Transport spell from one end of my room to another, although I ended up banging my knee on the edge of my desk. For a brief moment, I'd thought I'd spliced myself open, so I decided against attempting any more solo trips until I was better at them.
I rushed through all of my assignments on Friday night, even completing a few that weren't due until later in the week. And based on how I felt after half a minute of sparring, it was a good thing I'd gotten ahead.
"This is ridiculous," I cried, lying face up in the sand.
Like last time, Gavon wasted no time in firing off attack spells at me, and, also like last time, after just a few seconds, I became incredibly lightheaded and couldn't continue.
Gavon offered his hand to help me up. "Rome wasn't built in a day, Alexis. All things considered, you're doing very well for having magic for less than two weeks."
"Yeah but, seriously," I said, ignoring his hand in favor of laying on the ground. After all, the world was spinning, so the more of me that connected with the earth the better. "Three spells, and I'm done."
"And last week, you could only wield two," Gavon said, finally retracting his hand. He sat down next to me, facing the moon shining on the gulf waters. "Progress is progress. And you are releasing all your energy in those three blasts."
"I can't help it," I said, chancing my ability to sit up. "You said it's all instinct, and my instinct is to fire off…well…all of it. And to go one week between spells? That's just…I'll be ninety before we can really get a good sparring match in."
It might've been a trick of the night, but I thought I saw him smile. But he was merely pensive. "Going slowly is preferable when you're learning how to spar. As you can see, you're talking about a lot of power. Wielded incorrectly, you might cause significant damage."
I snorted. "The only one I'm damaging is myself. You swear there's no way to speed up this process?"
"I'll see you next Friday."
I was not going to wait all week just to throw three spells, especially if sparring made me feel like I'd run a marathon the next morning. Gavon probably had his reasons for wanting me to heal slowly, but by midday Saturday, I was pretty sure his reasons were stupid. I knew he had healing potions, and it irked me that he wasn't handing them over. Especially considering my only other options weren't helping me either. Nicole point-blank told me to stop asking her how to brew potions and the primer had nothing except a long list of ways to maintain a magical herb garden and the best schedule for planting.
Sunday afternoon, I sat in the kitchen, flipping through my primer for the billionth time with a cup of coffee and a frown on my face. Jeanie and Nicole came and went, and neither mentioned the book I was looking at, but Jeanie stopped and asked why I was pouting.
"Just frustrated," I said, sitting up and tapping my fingers on the coffee mug. "Do we have any magic books?"
"Not here. Gram has a couple," Jeanie said. "Next time I go up there, I can grab you one."
"You're going up there?" I asked, sitting up. "Can I go?"
Something unreadable crossed her face. "Not yet, Lexie. I'm still working on it."
"Why does Gram hate me?"
Jeanie sighed loudly. "Gram doesn't hate you."
"So why aren't I allowed to go up to the compound?"
"Because that's what she wants right now."
"And we're magically-bound to that, huh?" I said, picking at my coffee mug.
"Where on earth did you hear that phrase?" Jeanie asked.
"Um…" I swallowed and scrambled through my foggy brain to come up with an excuse. "I made it up? I mean, you said that whatever she says goes, and it's bound by the clan."
"S-sure," Jeanie said, still eyeing me warily. "What kind of book do you want?"
"Potions."
Jeanie barked a laugh. "And have you blow up another room in this house? No way. Try again, kid."
I glared at her. "Jeanie, come on."
"If you want a potion, talk to Nicole."
"I already tried that. She said no."
"Then perhaps it's not such a good idea, hm?" Jeanie said, walking out of the kitchen.
"Then perhaps it's not such a good idea," I said, mimicking her. A force smacked me upside the head, and I winced.
"I heard that," Jeanie's voice called.
By Monday, I was getting desperate. There was one thing I hadn't tried, one which had such a low likelihood of actually working that I hadn't actually considered it a viable option. But desperate times and all that.
I turned the corner to the senior lockers and kept my head down. As usual, everyone was too interested in their conversations to notice me, so I was able to thread my way through until I saw the object of my quest.
Approaching slowly, I considered all the things I could use as a bargaining chip. If it were Nicole, I might be able to offer some magic-type favors. But since Marie had just as much ability as I did, that wouldn't work.
I found my sister surrounded by her friends, a veiled smile on her face. She always looked calculating to me, like she was determining which person was of value to her at any given time. Her smile turned into a glower when she saw me standing at the other end of the hall, and she purposefully ignored me.
"M-Marie?" I asked quietly. "Can I talk to you?"
"I'm sorry, do you guys hear that?" Marie said loudly to her friends. "Sounds like the world's most obnoxious wind."
A twitter of laughter erupted around them, but Marie's friends took the hint and left her alone with me. She wore all the contempt of fifteen years' worth of hatred on her face.
"What?"
"I need your help with something."
She snorted. "Really? Little Miss Perfect needs my help? After what you did to me?"
"I am really sorry I lost control," I said, making sure to pump the sincerity into my voice. "Really. But I've been practicing a lot lately and I think I need you to heal me."
Marie studied me for a second and I thought I saw the ghost of concern on her face. "Your magic is really low."
"You can tell?"
"Of course I can, idiot. The question is…why?"
"Why is it so low?" I shrugged. "I've been practicing a lot—"
"No, why would I help you?"
I groaned. "Come on, Marie, don't do this. I need your help."
"Well, maybe you shouldn't do whatever it is you're doing if you can't handle it."
"Marie, please. You're my big sister, and I need you."
She laughed, but there was no love in it. "After the stunt you pulled? No way. Figure it out yourself." She slammed her locker shut and glared at me. "And, for the record, you aren't my sister."
Marie had been throwing that insult in my face for as long as I'd been alive, and except for a few months when I was six, I'd never actually believed it. But what had truly hurt was that Marie had been my last option for healing quicker, and now that I'd used it up, I had nothing left to try but patience. And even though it was severely diminished, that magical hum tingled under my skin, begging to be used.
Gavon wasn't at the park that night either, which felt appropriate for the disappointing day I was having. I'd gotten accustomed to him showing up whenever I was down or upset, being an ear to talk to.
My face must've betrayed my mood, because Nicole asked me what was wrong when I walked by her open door.
I stopped and leaned against the doorframe. "Had a bad day."
"Wanna talk about it?"
I shrugged and crossed the room to climb into her bed, like I had when I was younger. Nicole moved her thick chemistry books out of the way and patted her pillow for me to lie down on.
"What's wrong? Did you fail another test?" she asked.
I winced. "How'd you find out?"
"Mills called Jeanie and asked if everything was okay with you," Nicole said with a smile. "Granted, she's used to fielding phone calls about Marie, but this was your first."
"I retook the test and passed it," I said, sitting up. "I was just having a bad day."
"You seem to be having a lot of those recently. So what did you want to talk about?"
How can I heal faster after sparring? Why does Gram hate me? Why didn't you tell me about magic sooner? Why do I get the feeling everyone's keeping secrets from me?
"Why does Marie hate me?"
"Currently? You tossed her through the wall."
I frowned. "That was an accident."
Nicole chuckled and leaned back on her pillows. "Yeah, but…it wouldn't have happened if you didn't want to on some level."
"I mean." I picked at her comforter. "The spell was…I mean, it was really easy to do. I felt like I was…" I wasn't sure I wanted to tell Nicole how great attack spells were, in case she told Jeanie and I got in trouble. "I didn't know what would happen. I didn't want to hurt her."
"I know, Lexie," Nicole said. "And Marie's just…well, she's Marie. She's always been Marie and we just have to love her."
"Do we though?"
"Try to understand. Marie's under a lot of pressure right now. She's graduating high school in May. And to be perfectly honest, she's not really doing so hot." Nicole glanced out of her open door. "She hasn't even applied for college. I don't think she has the grades to get in. And her ego's too big to consider community college."
"So what does that have to do with being awful to me?"
"Lexie, can't you see she's jealous of you? School's always come easily to you, and it's never been for Marie. And now she's realizing that you can't just float your way through life and expect everything to work out. Magic and good looks can only do so much for you."
I'd never considered that perfect Marie would ever be jealous of me, but that didn't excuse her crappy behavior. "I think she blames me for what happened to Mom."
"That's ridiculous," Nicole said with a harshness that surprised me. "You had nothing to do with Mom's death."
Something tickled in the back of my mind, a memory of a man that disappeared before I could grasp it.
"I think part of the problem is that Jeanie lets her get away with too much," Nicole said, again, glancing out the door. "The thing about magic is that you have what you're born with, and Jeanie never had much to begin with. Marie's more powerful than she is, and Jeanie knows it. But Jeanie can also take away Marie's magic, which she does all the time."
"Take away her magic?" I asked.
"Do you remember your Magic's Eve, when Jeanie stopped all that destruction?" I nodded. "That was a grounding spell. As your guardian, she can take away your magic to punish you."
I gulped, thankful that Jeanie hadn't grounded me yet.
"So when Jeanie does that, Marie gets in that convertible and disappears for a few nights," Nicole said. "And round and round they go. I think Jeanie's secretly counting down the hours until Marie moves out. Marie's never adjusted to living here and as much as I hate it, I think we'll all be happier when we're living in separate spaces."
"Are you going to move out?" I asked quietly. I didn't like the idea of living alone with Jeanie. Something told me I'd suddenly become responsible for all the meal planning.
"Not for a while," Nicole said. "Someday, maybe. After you graduate."
I opened my mouth to respond when my gaze landed on her open closet—or more specifically, the potion book that sat discarded on the floor. And suddenly, an idea took root in the back of my mind. Perhaps I wasn't completely out of options yet.
"Well, I should probably get started on my homework," I said, pushing myself to stand.
"Let me know if you need any help with chemistry," Nicole said, pulling her own books back to her. I glanced at the chemistry book, then the potions book on the floor, and then hurried out of the room.