Shanna pushed the barn door open and marched inside. Toby would return to the house. Surely there was a nearby neighbor Cody could send for if he needed help with the birthing — they had passed scattered houses on the trip from Liberty. They hadn't been what she considered prosperous looking farms, but the people in the yards had waved and called friendly greetings. She could even offer to carry the message herself, if Cody would saddle her a horse.
Eyes adjusting to the dim light after the bright snow outside, Shanna tried to decide where to look for the Cody and Toby. The inane thought that she had never been in a barn before passed through her mind. In New York, a stableboy always delivered her little mare to the front steps. She sniffed tentatively, finding the unfamiliar odors strangely pleasant and the interior of the barn far cleaner than she had expected.
A snort beside her made Shanna jump and swivel toward the first stall in the barn, where a paint pony peeked over a half door. She walked over to pat the soft muzzle and the pony nudged her hand, then stretched its neck out in an attempt to reach her cloak pocket.
"Oh no you don't!" Shanna chuckled and dodged the inquisitive muzzle. "I don't have anything in my pocket for you. I used to carry sugar for my mare, though, and I know what you're looking for. I'll bring you something next time." She caught herself laughing at what she imagined was a look of reproachment in the pony's eyes.
Suddenly a loud neigh, heavy with pain and agony, split the air inside the barn. Shanna clasped her throat and whirled around. After the echoes of the sound died in the barn, she heard voices murmuring, the sounds coming from a stall further in the shadowed recesses of the barn.
"Son," Shanna heard Cody saying when she finally gathered enough courage to approach the open door of the other stall. "If you want to go on up to the house, it's all right. This isn't going to be pleasant."
"No," Toby replied. "She's quieter when I hold her and talk to her."
Shanna stared at the brown mare lying on the straw-littered floor, her sides heaving and her head resting in Toby's small lap. She stifled a gasp when the mare's eyes rolled back and her legs thrashed, sending Cody scrambling away from the iron-shod hooves. Toby bent his head over the mare's ear and spoke soothingly to her, and she quieted again.
Cody caught sight of Shanna standing in the stall door and walked over to her, his face grim in the dim light. "Look, you better get back up to the house."
"I came out here to get Toby."
"That's up to him," Cody said with a shrug. "He's doing a good job keeping that mare quiet. And I'm afraid I really am going to need some help."
Toby raised his head and his eyes implored Shanna. "Shanna, I'll come if you say I have to. But she's hurtin', Shanna, and I'm helping her bear it."
"Toby, do you have any idea what's going on here?"
"She's gonna have a baby colt or filly, Shanna. Sometimes it hurts them, but she'll be happy and proud of her new baby after she gets it pushed out."
"Pushed ou...my lord." Her blue eyes flashed at Cody. "What have you told him?"
"Just what to expect. He won't be much help to me if he doesn't know what's going to happen."
The mare gave a moan and her sides heaved again. Shanna's face whitened and she watched Toby bend down again to murmur to the mare, his hands stroking the sides of her muzzle.
"Make up your mind," Cody barked at Shanna. "I think that colt's turned the wrong way, and I've got to try to turn it around. If you want to be useful, too, go back to the house and fetch the water I'm sure Bessie's got on the stove for me."
Ignoring Shanna, Cody again knelt in the straw by the mare's hindquarters. When he reached for the mare's tail, Shanna gasped and ran for the barn door.
Outside the barn, Shanna pulled in a steadying breath of the cold air. Somewhat calmer, she glanced over her shoulder, her mind filled with the scene inside and her heart aching with pity for the mare. She hadn't reached the age of twenty without knowing something of childbirth, and just last year one of her friends had died giving birth to her first child. Shanna recalled the whispers of breach birth at her friend's funeral.
She hesitated uncertainly. She didn't want Toby to be sitting there with the mare's head in his arms when she died. But Cody had said something about turning the colt. Could that be possible?
Another shrill neigh from inside the barn decided Shanna. She raced down the now well-travelled path through the snow and up the steps into the kitchen.
Bessie barely acknowledged Shanna as she emerged from the pantry, a stack of clean linen towels and a bar of soap in her arms.
"Get the bucket of water from the stove," Bessie ordered as she started for the door. "I heard the mare scream. I reckon it's a breach birth, and Cody's going to have to try to turn the colt."
"Aunt Bessie," Melinda said from her seat at the table. "I don't want to stay here by myself."
"Then come on, child," Bessie said. "But you wait at the barn door. Your father won't want you coming inside."
Melinda slid from her chair and went after Bessie as Shanna grabbed another towel from the rack by the stove. She wrapped it around the hot handle of the water bucket and carried it with her back out the door.
Hours later, Shanna sat on the bale of hay she had dragged up to the stall door, her hands clenched in her lap and her lips moving in prayer. It didn't even dawn on her to look away from where Cody had his arm deep inside the mare. She gave a cry of joy when Cody pulled a tiny muzzle out. A second later, the mare gave a final, mighty heave and the colt slipped onto the straw.
"How wonderful," she breathed. She rose to her feet and quickly glanced at Toby. He was still curled up asleep at the mare's head, his arm around her nose.
"Let him sleep a few more minutes," Cody said as he worked over the colt. "He's done a good job."
"Yes, he did," Shanna agreed. "I never thought...he's only five."
Cody grunted a reply she didn't catch and continued working. He had long ago removed his coat and shirt, and his broad back glistened with sweat, even in the chilly barn. Shanna watched the muscles play across his back as he wiped the colt with handfuls of straw.
The mare gave another moan and Shanna cried out, "What's wrong?"
"Afterbirth," Cody muttered.
Shanna's stomach heaved. This time she turned away for a few seconds. When she looked back, Cody was replacing a pitchfork against the wall of the stall. Then he knelt by one of the fresh buckets of water Shanna had brought out an hour earlier to wash his hands and arms.
"Now," he said after he dried himself on the remaining clean towel, "let's see if we can get this little fellow on his feet."
Before he could reach for the colt, the mare pulled her legs under her and scrambled to her feet. Her movements woke Toby and he rubbed at his eyes for an instant before he gave a gasp and jumped up.
"Is it here, Cody?" he asked. "The baby?"
"Right here, son," Cody said with a chuckle as he moved around the mare. "Let's let the mother get acquainted with it first, though. All right? You come on over here with your sister and me."
Toby cautiously walked around the mare, his eyes wide with wonder as he stared down at the colt in the straw. He joined Shanna and Cody outside the stall and watched with rapt attention as the mare nudged the colt to its feet. The colt stood rocking precariously on his outrageously long legs for a second before it collapsed back to the stall floor.
"Oh, the poor thing," Shanna said.
Shanna instinctively started forward, but Cody caught her hand. "Don't," he said quietly. "Just watch a minute."
Shanna stared down at their clasped hands for a second, then quickly forgot about them when the colt gave a faint nicker.
The second time the colt heaved itself to its feet, it managed to maintain its balance. After a nudge from its mother, it wobbled toward the mare's hindquarters and stuck its head underneath.
"What's it doing, Cody?" Toby asked, his voice barely a whisper as he watched the colt's little broomtail begin twitching from side to side.
"Eatin', Toby," Cody told him. "That bag has the mare's milk in it. He gets it by sucking on those teats hanging down there. All newborn babies that drink milk get it that way, even human ones."
"Oh!" Shanna gasped as a blush of embarrassment stole over her face. She felt a squeeze on her hand and glanced at Cody to meet his smiling brown eyes.
"Sorry," Cody said. "I keep forgetting, you two are city folks."
Shanna pulled her hand free and moved a step away from him. Suddenly she whirled toward Toby.
"What did you just say, Toby?" she asked in a voice laced with astonishment as her small brother's last remark penetrated her jumbled thoughts.
"I asked you if you'll feed your babies like that when you have them, Shanna," Toby repeated, his eyes centered somewhere near Shanna's stomach. "Cody said...."
Cody's loud guffaw threatened to drown out Shanna's voice and she stepped around him to reach for Toby's arm.
"I think you better get on up to the house and eat something, Toby." Shanna gave him a shove toward the barn door. "Aunt Bessie left some sandwiches on the table for us. I'll be there in a minute and show you where we're sleeping."
Toby gave a sigh and looked up at Cody. "I guess that's something Shanna will talk to me about later," he said. "She's always telling me I'm too young to know about some things and that she'll tell me about them later."
"Go on, son," Cody said around his laughter. "The colt will be here in the morning, and you have to pick out a name for him."
"Me? You mean, I get to name him? And how do you know it's a boy colt? You said it could be either a boy colt or a girl filly."
"Of course you're going to name him," Cody said. "After all, I don't think he'd have lived if you hadn't helped me — or maybe the mare either." He glanced at Shanna, again trying to smother laughter. "But let's wait until tomorrow for me to show you how I know it's a colt and not a filly."
"Get on up to the house, Toby," Shanna said through gritted teeth.
"Yes, ma'am," Toby said as he obeyed.
Cody waited until Toby disappeared out the barn door before he turned back to Shanna. "Sometimes that boy acts more like your son than your brother."
"He should," Shanna said without thinking. "I've practically raised him since he was born."
"His mother died in childbirth? Then, I guess I understand why you were afraid to leave him here with the mare being in trouble."
"N...no," Shanna admitted. "Mother died a couple months ago. But she hardly ever left her bed after Toby was born. I took care of him, along with the nu...."
"Nurse?" Cody prodded when Shanna fell silent. "If you're used to a houseful of servants, what in the world are you doing out here all alone? You're certainly of an age that you could have taken over the house after your mother died."
"The only thing that should concern you is that I've had experience with children," Shanna fired back at him, quickly regretting that she had allowed him even a glimpse into her background. "You don't have to worry that you can't trust your daughter to my care."
"That's not what I'm worried about," Cody muttered. "But since you brought it up," he continued before Shanna could speak again, "you've had experience with a child, one child, not children. And that child was a boy, not a girl. My daughter has been through a traumatic experience, and she needs time to heal from it."
"You can allow her to heal without spoiling her rotten. Children grow from bad experiences sometimes, if they're handled right."
"Melinda spoiled?" Cody shot back. "This is probably the first time in his life that Toby ever got a speck of dirt on him. I'm surprised you weren't over there washing his face while he held the mare."
"Well, I wasn't, was I? And I heard you tell Toby what a good job he did. You even rewarded him by telling him he could name the colt."
"Children learn from rewards."
"Not rewards like chocolate cake." Shanna tilted her head up at him, her lips pursed in disapproval. "Rewards like that are meaningless. They only give a physical gratification to a child. Emotional gratifications mean much more, like letting Toby name the colt. That's something he'll remember long after the taste of a piece of cake has disappeared. Why is it you can see that with a child who isn't your own, yet not with Melinda? Aunt Bessie's afraid Melinda's going to grow into a spoiled southern belle."
"I know exactly what my aunt thinks about how I treat Melinda!" Cody almost yelled at her, the prissy, self- righteous look on Shanna's face and his tiredness making him less guarded than usual with his words. "She and I disagree on just what the difference is between my protecting Melinda and babying her. But just what the hell is wrong with her being spoiled a bit? There's not a damned thing wrong with a woman who depends on a man to take care of her and pamper her! If I'd taken better care of my wife, Melinda wouldn't be growing up without a mother to care for her!"
"My God, Cody," Shanna said, her indignation leaving her as she watched him turn angrily away and reach for his shirt. "You were off fighting a war. Bessie told me what happened when the Jayhawkers came. There were millions of women left behind during the war, and you can't possibly blame yourself for what happened."
"Yeah, I was off fighting a war." Cody shrugged into his shirt, keeping his back to Shanna. "Against Yankees."
Shanna unthinkingly reached out and grabbed his arm. With a force that surprised Cody, she spun him around until he faced her.
"And I guess that's just another thing you resent about me and another reason why you don't want me to care for your daughter. I'm one of those damned Yankees!"
"I'll thank you not to use language like that around my daughter!"
"Oh, and what about you telling Toby about bags and t...teats!"
"That's different. He's a boy."
"A five year old boy," Shanna said with a stamp of her foot. "He's got plenty of time to learn about those things. I didn't see you bringing Melinda out here to witness a colt being born, and she's only a year younger!"
"Of course not. She's a...."
"I know, I know," Shanna broke in. "She's a girl. And she's supposed to be pampered and spoiled and protected from the hard things in life."
"That's right," Cody said, a smug look on his face.
"Maybe your wife would have been a little better protected if she'd known some of the hard facts of life," Shanna spat at him before she could stop herself.
Shanna took a step back, horrified as she realized what she had said and wishing she could unspeak it. The thunder clouding Cody's face told her he would never forget the words.
"What was between my wife and me is none of your damned business!" Cody took a threatening step toward her. "Just like you seem to feel your background is none of mine. And if I ever hear you say something like that in front of my daughter, I'll send your fanny packing so fast you won't know what hit you!"
"I...I'm sorry. I had no right to say that, and I'm really dreadfully sorry about it."
When Cody continued to glare at her, his anger not abating one iota, Shanna dropped her eyes. "Look, this is obviously not going to work. If you'll take Toby and me back to town in the morning, we'll get out of your life."
"And go where?" Cody demanded. "I sure as hell don't have any money to lend you in order to get you off my hands. What little I had was in the bank."
"I...I'll get work in town," Shanna quickly decided. "I heard the desk clerk asking someone if they knew anyone who was looking for a waitress job. The one they have now is going to have a ba...is in the family way and wants to quit."
"Perkins needs someone who knows how to wait on other people instead of just ordering them to do the things that need done," Cody informed her. "And his waitress also washes dishes. Those lily white hands of yours would be cracked and bleeding after the first pan full."
Shanna unconsciously rubbed her hand against the side of her cloak, recalling just how Cody knew how soft her hands were. "I...I'll find something," she assured him. "I have to take care of Toby."
The mare whickered softly and both Cody and Shanna watched quietly as the mare laid down in the straw and began licking the colt curled at her side. Cody glanced at Shanna, remembering how many times she had trudged to the house and back in the cold night air, bringing more hot water for him, and how she had stood resolutely by in case he needed more help than Toby could give him. He found himself surprised, now that he thought about it, at how much her quiet presence had meant during the ordeal. Her face was softened into quiet wonder as she gazed at the mare and colt, and his anger at her evaporated.
"Look," he said at last. "You and the boy both earned your keep tonight, at least for a few days. We're adults, and we should be able to work this out. Besides, even though I own this place, Aunt Bessie's the one who runs the house and she's decided she needs help with Melinda. I'll admit, I hadn't thought about it until she began nagging me a few weeks ago and demanded we send out wires looking for someone willing to come out here. Now that you're here, why don't we give it a try?"
Shanna looked up hopefully at him and saw Cody's hand extended toward her.
"Truce?"
"Truce," Shanna agreed. She gave his hand a short shake, then quickly pulled her own back. "You're right. We're adults and we should be able to set some ground rules without sniping at each other constantly."
"Yeah, well, let's wait until morning to discuss the rules," Cody said with a tired sigh. He arched his back, his hands reaching around to massage the small of it beneath the tail of his unbuttoned shirt. "I don't think I'm up to it right now."
"M...me, either." Shanna licked her lips around a suddenly dry mouth and tore her eyes from open shirt. When Cody dropped his hands back to his sides, she feigned a yawn and lifted a hand to stifle it. "I'll go see if Bessie left any coffee on," she said, willing her legs to move to the barn door. Instead, the trembling muscles telegraphed a message to her brain that they needed a moment to recover, or she would find herself tottering like the unsteady colt.
"Don't bother making any if she didn't," Cody told her, and Shanna breathed a silent sigh of thankfulness when he casually reached for his shirt buttons. "I forgot all about milking the cow this evening. I'll do it now and bring the milk up so we can have some hot chocolate. It's after midnight, and coffee would just keep us awake."
"Chocolate, huh?" Shanna managed a smile as he buttoned the bottom button over his flat stomach. "Is that one of your weaknesses, too?"
"Yeah," Cody admitted. "Guess Melinda gets it from me."
"Who cares for your animals when you're gone?" Shanna asked. Her legs were steady now — almost. "As you pointed out, I'm city folks, but I do know that cows need to be milked every day."
"Our nearest neighbors are the Samuels, Zerelda and Pappy. I grew up with Frank and Jesse James, and now I get one of their little brothers to take care of the stock when I have to be away."
"James? I thought you said their name was Samuel."
"The two oldest boys and Susie are named James," Cody replied. "Zerelda was married to a minister, Robert James, but he died out in California, where he'd gone to spread the word. At least, that's what he told his wife. Folks say he caught the gold fever instead. Zerelda married Doc Reuben Samuel after that, and they've got a brood of their own."
"A doctor? You called him...."
"I know, it's kind of confusing," Cody said with a laugh. "Folks who know them call Reuben 'Pappy'. He's not a practicing doctor any longer. I heard Zerelda tell Bessie once that she married Pappy so she would have a doctor around to help her with her kids. She lost her second son to fever, and I think she lost her mind for a little while."
"People do marry for strange reasons sometimes," Shanna mused, thinking of her own reason for being in Missouri.
"Oh, Zerelda's just kidding when she says that," Cody told her. "They're quite a pair. She must be six feet and Pappy's just a little man. You can tell when you see them together just how much they really do care for each other, but Zerelda's main love in life is her children. Everyone who knows her sees that. I sure hope the rumors in town aren't true. I think that would just about kill Zerelda."
"Rumors?" Shanna prodded when Cody fell silent.
The cow lowed from its stall at the far end of the barn, and Cody quickly glanced that way.
"I better get Miss Moo taken care of. That's Melinda's name for her, you know. I told her a bedtime story once that had a cow named Miss Moo in it, and she decided our cow should have a name, too. I think she's got names for almost everything on the farm, but I can't keep them straight. We have a time when one of the animals disappears and she can't find it. Luckily, she hasn't made the connection yet with what we have to eat sometimes."
"Oh," Shanna said with a grimace. "I hope she doesn't figure that out too soon."
"Yeah, me, too," Cody said. He looked down at Shanna. "I guess that's at least one thing we can agree Melinda should be sheltered from for a while yet."
"Yes, and Toby, too," Shanna replied, her eyes challenging him.
"Point taken," Cody said with a tired sigh.
Shanna gave a decisive nod of her head and turned away.
Cody watched her until she disappeared into the blackness outside the barn door, his brow furrowed in concentration. Despite her attempts to keep her background a mystery, he was slowly picking up details here and there. He was pretty sure Bessie hadn't forgotten to open the chimney damper earlier, but Shanna's first thought had evidently been to get the children out of the smoke, since Melinda had been in her arms when he ran to the house.
Shanna wasn't used to being on her own or having to watch out for danger. Look at how she lost her money and ended up in the middle of the bank robbery, let alone almost gotten trampled by a horse.
"In her own way," Cody muttered to himself, "she was probably just as pampered as Nancy."
But, his mind continued, she sure isn't afraid to try new things, and she's determined to make the best of her situation.
What in heaven's name was she doing here, though? Why didn't she hightail it back to her safe and sound world up north, where she would have a houseful of servants to help take care of her little brother?
Toby, now, there was some little boy. If he and Nancy had had a son, Cody would have wished him to be much like Toby. The boy was obedient most of the time, and obviously respected his sister. But he didn't hesitate to speak his mind and reason with Shanna when he wanted her to rethink her orders.
It crossed Cody's thoughts that this was a much better manner for a child to get its way than whining, and a flicker of admiration for the way Shanna had raised Toby came through. Shanna must have only been about fifteen when Toby was born, and the only thing she would have had on which to base her concepts of how to teach Toby would have been the principles she was taught herself. Maybe having her pass a few of them on to Melinda wouldn't be such a bad idea.
If he could only keep remembering that Shanna was Melinda's teacher, instead of recalling the soft curves beneath the wool cloak, the cute way she stamped her foot when she got in a pique, the silky blond hair just made for a man's hands to tousle, the eyes as blue as the acres of Texas bluebonnets he had seen one spring during the war....
The cow lowed loudly. Cody sighed and started toward the stall. It wasn't going to be easy keeping his hands to himself with Shanna living in the same house, but by damn he would do it. The lady had depths and secrets not at all to his liking in a woman. He preferred his women open and guileless — women who appreciated having a man around to lean on. He would keep a wary eye on the way she handled his daughter, but that would be the extent of his dealings with Shanna Allen.
Taking offense at the less than gentle hands on her swollen sack, Miss Moo sent the bucket flying, spilling the scant inch of milk in the bottom. The cow turned its head and lowed warningly at Cody when he shot her a disgruntled look and rose to fetch a clean bucket.
"Females," Cody muttered under his breath when he returned to the three-legged stool. This time, though, he patted Miss Moo on the side and laid his head against her warm flank, his fingers coaxing for instead of demanding the milk. Miss Moo gave a contented burp and retrieved her cud from her front stomach, chewing complacently while the milk gushed into the bucket, foam rising from the force of the heavy streams.