"Oh, pshaw, Shanna," Bessie said with an exasperated sigh. "There are only three small children coming for half a day now. The older ones are all in the fields helping plant, even the girls. How do you expect me to fill my days, with Cody still insisting we need Susie every day and me not being quite ready for that rocking chair on the porch?"
"I worry about your health, Bessie."
"My body's a little slow, but there's still not a thing wrong with my brain. I've found looking forward to the little ones coming for a time each day gives me something to get out of bed for. And Pappy says it's good for me. What's really bothering you?"
"I feel like I've gone back on my word. After all, I promised to stay six months."
"For pity sakes, Shanna, I could have taught Melinda all along, if Cody had hired me a housekeeper."
"Bessie, I know Susie's not working for free. At first, she was just helping out, but now...."
"Cody's promised Zerelda and Pappy a share of the feed we grow for their own stock this winter, and I'm sure he'll also give Susie a little something for herself, after the crops are in. It's all taken care of. Now, tell me what the dickens has got you so jittery. A person would think you'd be glad of the free time to prepare for your wedding, but you didn't come back from that trip yesterday exactly the blushing bride-to-be."
Bessie's shrewd eyes studied Shanna while Shanna wandered around the empty classroom. They hadn't had a private moment to talk the previous evening amid the flurry of Shanna's return, since Shanna spent most of the evening talking to Toby out by the corral, preparing him for today's meeting with JT.
"I'm just worried about how things will go today when I take Toby over to Zerelda's," Shanna finally replied evasively. "And I'm really going to miss you and Melinda when I leave. JT...JT thinks I should move into the hotel in Liberty until the wedding."
"Wants to keep you and Cody as far apart as he can, does he?" Bessie asked astutely.
"No! I mean...."
"JT's not blind. Cody's been stomping around like a wounded bull since he got back, and you've got shadows under your eyes you never had before. You've lost weight — that dress we made you a while back just hangs on you. Maybe JT has the right idea. I don't fancy living here with you and Cody the next two weeks, while your wedding day gets closer and closer."
At the even more forlorn look on Shanna's face, Bessie steeled her resolve. Though it tore at her to see Cody and this woman she had come to hold dear throwing away their chance at happiness, she had to think of Cody and Melinda first.
"It's better to make it a clean break," she said to Shanna. "I'm not kicking you out. Please don't think that, Shanna. I just don't see any other way to do this."
"There isn't any other way." Shanna stared out the window, where Cody was already in his fields, walking behind a pair of sturdy plow horses. Exhausted from her trip, she had missed him at breakfast.
He hadn't been there the next morning by the creek, either. Instead, she found JT waiting for her to wake, the horses already saddled and ready. He told her Cody had asked what their plans were, then informed JT that he would make better time riding back alone, using the excuse that he needed to get started on his planting.
Yesterday evening, when she finally mustered enough courage to ask, Bessie said Cody was in Kearney, waiting for the blacksmith to repair one of his plows. Shanna had heard Cody ride in late, but her nerve failed when she reached for the doorknob as he came down the hallway toward his room. The thin wall that separated them that night might as well have been as thick as a medieval castle wall.
"I'll pack mine and Toby's things," Shanna said as she turned from the window.
"Never mind. I'll have Susie do it after you leave. I imagine JT's expecting you over at Zerelda's."
"Yes, he is."
"Then, best you get going." Bessie rose from the chair behind the desk. At the door to the parlor, she reached out and pulled Shanna into her arms.
"I want you to know, honey," Bessie said when she released her, "that I wish it could have been different. I'll never forget you."
"Nor I, you and....you will come to the wedding, won't you?"
"Yes, Melinda and I'll be there." Bessie purposely didn't mention Cody.
"Thank you, Bessie."
Shanna walked quickly through the kitchen, giving Susie only a nod when Susie turned from the counter, where she was stirring something in a bowl. But before Shanna could pull the door closed behind her, Susie caught up, wiping her hands on her apron.
"Shanna, we haven't talked about your wedding dress. You are going to let me make it for you, aren't you?"
"Of course I want you to," Shanna replied, mustering a smile. "But I'm going to be moving into the hotel this afternoon. How will you manage the dress, along with working here?" The last thing Shanna wanted was to have the fittings for her dress in Bessie's kitchen, where Cody could walk in at any moment.
Susie gleaned the dilemma — Shanna saw the knowledge in her eyes. Did everyone in the entire state know she was in love with Cody, but marrying JT Randolph?
"You can spend a night or two with Mother and me," Susie insisted. "I've already got your measurements, from when I helped with your other dresses. Maybe Melinda can even visit with Toby those evenings."
"All right, Susie," Shanna gave in. "I'll get some material in Liberty and bring it out in a couple days."
"I'll see you then," Susie agreed, turning back to her baking.
Shanna found Toby and Melinda, as usual, with their ponies. Melinda willingly headed into the house to wait for the other children to arrive for lessons, skipping along the way, her blond braids bouncing against her back. Still unaware of the impact the coming marriage would have on her young life, Melinda's sunny disposition gave them all a great deal of pleasure now. Shanna knew the responsibility for telling Melinda rested on her own shoulders, and she didn't look forward to it. She wouldn't avoid it, either.
The road to Zerelda's ran along the field Cody was plowing for several hundred feet. Shanna, mounted on the gray mare still on loan from the Samuels, kept the mare at a slow pace in deference to Chessy's shorter legs. Drawn against her resistance, Shanna watched Cody until they rounded a bend. Never once did Cody glance in their direction — at least, not while Shanna could see him.
As they rode up to Zerelda's log house a while later, Shanna looked apprehensively at Toby. His sandy hair ruffled in the wind, and he sat his small saddle straight, his face calm and accepting. When he caught Shanna's glance, he smiled.
"It's exciting, isn't it, Shanna? Almost like my birthday. I feel like I'm getting a present!"
"I'm proud of you, Toby. You know that, don't you?"
"Uh huh," Toby responded with a bob of his head, drawing a chuckle from Shanna with his unexpected answer. He pulled Chessy to a halt in front of the hitching post and slid down, his eyes wide with anticipation when Shanna joined him and looped her mare's reins beside the pony's.
"How soon can I see him, Shanna?"
The screen door opened. "Right now, son," JT said, limping onto the porch. "If that's all right with your sister."
Toby threw Shanna a question with his eyes, and she nodded her head. Toby slowly walked up the porch steps and stopped a few feet from JT, studying the tall man closely.
JT hadn't worn his hat. Zerelda had washed his shirt, and Toby wore a matching white one. JT leaned on his crutch, accepting Toby's close scrutiny and seeing Diedre in this small figure, too, though Shanna had spoken of how much Toby resembled him. He shifted his stance nervously, nonplused to realize just how much this little boy's approval meant and how deep his own emotions ran. Being faced with Toby's physical presence stirred him beyond anything he had ever imagined in his mind the last few days.
Balancing on his crutch, JT held out his right hand. "Hello, son."
Toby stuck out his own small hand and accepted the handshake. "Hello, sir. I'm really glad to finally get to meet you."
JT reluctantly broke the handshake before he could drag the small body into his arms, as he found himself wanting to.
Take it slow, he reminded himself. He doesn't know you yet. He nodded at the porch swing. "Want to sit and talk for a while, Toby?"
"Yes, sir. I've got lots of things I want to ask you."
"Ask away." JT lowered himself to the swing seat. "I'll tell you anything you want to know. Do you want to join us, Shanna?"
"No, I think I'll go talk to Zerelda. I'll be going back over to Co...to the Garret's after while to get our things, Toby. We'll be staying at the hotel in Liberty until the wedding."
"But I didn't say goodbye to Melinda," Toby said with a frown. "I didn't know we were leaving this soon. And what about Chessy?"
"Shanna told me the Samuels had agreed to let you use Chessy while you were here, Toby," JT put in. "If it's all right with them, I'll rent a stall for Chessy in Liberty. That way, you'll be able to ride in town, when you and Shanna aren't busy with your lessons."
"Yeah, I'd forgotten about that," Toby said, the frown still in place. "Guess I won't be going to school out here any more, either."
"It's way too far to ride every day, Toby," Shanna said. "And, if you like, I'll take you back with me to say goodbye to Melinda. You'll be seeing her again in a couple days, though. I'm bringing the material out here for Susie to work on my wedding dress. We'll probably spend the night then."
"Not over at Cody's?" Toby asked in a puzzled voice.
"Son, we've got a lot of plans to make," JT said before Shanna could form an answer for Toby. "I know your head's probably spinning with all the changes you've had in your life these past few months, but I want you to know that Shanna and I will talk everything over with you. Your own feelings will be a part of any decision we make."
"All right," Toby agreed in a hesitant voice, the impact of further changes in his life settling almost visibly on his small shoulders. "Are we still going to have mine and Melinda's birthday party Saturday?"
Shanna's heart went out to him. "Nothing will stand in the way of that party, Toby," she assured him. "Why, Susie's already baking cookies, and you should see the picture Bessie drew of the cake she's going to decorate for you both."
A smile crossed Toby's face again, sending a spasm of relief through Shanna. She opened the screen door as she heard Toby ask for JT's promise that he would be at the party, too.
"That's going to be a little awkward, isn't it, Shanna?" Zerelda asked from where she had been standing inside the door. "Cody and JT both at that party. Would you rather have it over here?"
Shanna shook her head. "Melinda's going to want Cody at her party, wherever we hold it, Zerelda. We're just going to have to be adult about this."
"I suppose," Zerelda said unconvincingly. "Is Cody still going to be your attorney for the final hearing on Toby's custody?"
"I haven't discussed it with him. If Judge Howard returns when he said he would, it will be two days after the wedding. Isn't there another attorney in Liberty besides Mr. Curley?"
"No. He's it, unless you send to Kansas City. Maybe Ed could recommend someone there for you, though I don't know if you could find someone on this short of notice."
"I'll just have to try, I guess."
Toby's voice came through the open window. "Shucks, I'll bet your men were glad to see you comin'. Chessy wouldn't have throwed me off like that."
JT's laughter rumbled and Shanna glanced out the window to see him ruffle Toby's sandy hair. Toby immediately climbed onto the swing seat and returned the gesture, his giggles joining JT's laughter. The brief tussle set the swing swaying, and Toby lost his balance, tumbling into JT's arms, which closed securely around him.