“Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm.”
• Grief is anything but orderly and predictable. You are not going to move through a series of stages toward some particular end point. If you can, consider your grief a meandering journey without a fixed destination.
• Though the needs of mourning are numbered 1 through 6 in the previous pages, it’s important to understand that grief is not an ordered progression toward hope and healing. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking your grief journey will be predictable or always forward-moving. Mourning is really a process that unfolds in its own unique way depending on how you choose to express yourself.
• Usually, grief hurts more before it begins to hurt less. Sometimes it will feel as if you are taking two steps forward and one step back.
• You will probably experience a multitude of different emotions in a wave-like fashion. You will also likely be working on more than one need of mourning at a time. This is normal.
• Be compassionate and patient with yourself as you experience your own unique grief journey.
CARPE DIEM
If you have read about or been told about the “stages” of grief, remember this is not how your grief will proceed. Don’t allow yourself or others to tell you how, when, and what your grief should be like.