Secrets for Your Diary

Secret #1

Do you really think mean people can change and become nice people … even friends?

Kate struggles with whether or not to believe Melissa Tolbert can change. After all, Melissa’s the wealthy girl who has dissed and been condescending to Kate and Tori at school and while boarding at the Ferrises’ barn. So why is she now offering to help paint the paddock fence and agreeing to work with them on ideas to promote the Ferris barn at The Dalles parade? Can Kate trust Melissa? What if she’s only playing a game of being nice so she can embarrass Kate, Tori, and Colt later?

If you were Kate, would you choose to trust and include Melissa in your group? Why or why not? What would your friends tell you to do? How is this similar to or different from what Tori and Colt are telling Kate?

Note from Kate

At first I didn’t want to give Melissa a chance. She’d been mean to me and Tori, and I figured she’d always be the same. I’m so glad that Colt and Tori encouraged me to accept Melissa and not be so quick to judge her. I guess God has really blessed me—He gave me friends who love me and don’t dump me just because I’m not the richest or most popular girl in school. I know He wants me to give other kids the same gift of friendship, and with His help, I’m going to try to do that from now on.

Secret #2

Have you ever been burned by somebody who seemed to be nice to your face but then talked about you behind your back? How did that gossip make you feel?

Kate, Colt, and Tori discuss whether to include Melissa in their group sleepover, and Melissa overhears at least part of their discussion. How does Melissa respond? What misunderstandings happen afterward on both sides because of that event? When Kate, Colt, and Tori discuss that they haven’t seen Melissa since they first talked about the parade, what does Kate say? Tori? Colt? Who do you think has the best perspective to solve the issue, and why?

How could you use that perspective to clear up some tension you have in a relationship now, whether with someone you consider a friend or an enemy? How might you spread some “good gossip” instead of the gossip that divides and judges people?

Note from Kate

Colt was right. We should have come right out and asked Melissa if something was bothering her instead of talking behind her back. We weren’t trying to be mean, but since she heard us talking, she didn’t know that. I’ve decided I need to be careful about other people’s feelings and try to put myself in their place instead of talking to a friend about them.

Secret #3

Have you faced any situation(s) where you felt “different” from the rest of a group? How were you treated as a result? How did that treatment make you feel about yourself? About others?

When Tori says that white kids sometimes treat her differently because she’s Hispanic, how does Melissa respond? Do you think the others realize how being teased or ignored can affect someone else? Why or why not?

When have you treated someone as different and excluded her or him from your group? How can you become more like Kate, who didn’t judge Tori but instead made friends with her?

Note from Kate

When I first moved to Odell, I sometimes felt like I was in the minority, as there were a lot more Hispanic kids there than at my old school. But I realized they are just kids, the same as me. They have dreams and hopes and things that have hurt them, and they don’t want to be left out any more than I do. Tori and I are about as different as two people can be, but we’re best friends. I’m so glad both of us looked past our skin color and decided to take a chance at being friends. I would have really missed out if we hadn’t.

Secret #4

Have you ever met someone who has been the subject of gossip and has been misunderstood? How did you deal with it when people gossiped when you were around?

Mrs. Maynard’s accident and her scar have caused her to stay in her home for long periods of time. As a result, some people think she’s strange, and rumors were started about her to the point where she was even accused of burying someone on her property. This has caused Mrs. Maynard a lot of pain. Have you ever taken part in this kind of gossip that hurt someone else? Or have you had friends who gossiped about you? How did it affect your life? What might you do to change things?

Note from Kate

Tori, Colt, and I couldn’t believe people could be so mean to Mrs. Maynard, and it made all of us mad. Then I realized that Melissa’s friends had done the same thing to her. In fact, we kind of did too. Melissa and Mrs. Maynard both felt left out and thrown away by their friends because they are different. Mrs. Maynard lost her beauty, and Melissa’s family lost their money, but that didn’t change who they are. When we finally figured that out, it made a big difference in understanding Melissa and Mrs. Maynard. From now on we’re going to be more careful about judging people when we don’t know their stories.