When I began writing this book, many people asked, Don’t you think your wife should be the one to tell this story? Why do you think this is your story?
At first, I had no response other than guilt. After all, Jamie had been the one directly impacted by the bombing, the one who had been targeted, the one who nearly lost everything. And in this context, the question – Why do you think this is your story? – became a debilitating one.
However, I eventually came to understand that this book, at its core, wasn’t about the bombing. It was about a personal attempt to overcome the psychological horrors that haunted me after the attack. It was about those horrors that have haunted both Israelis and Palestinians in the land where this attack occurred. And it was about how those horrors can be transcended by reconciliation – about its power to soften both our internal and external conflicts.
It was then that I knew this story was mine to tell – a story that certainly belongs to so many others as well. Obviously, one such person is my wife, Jamie, who I want to thank for her uncommon support and strength throughout this entire process – a process which has not been easy for either of us.
I also want to thank the amazing writers who helped me with this book during my time in the MFA in Creative Writing program at the University of North Carolina, Wilmington. Namely: Philip Gerard, Rebecca Lee, Sarah Messer, David Gessner, Wendy Brenner, Karen Bender, Robert Anthony Siegel, Clyde Edgerton, Haven Kimmel, Peter Trachtenberg, John Jeremiah Sullivan, Jason Mott, Tim Conrad, Adam Petry, Douglass Bourne, Lukis Kauffman, Kate Sweeney, Joe Bueter, Kara Norman, Jarvis Slacks, and so many more.
Special gratitude is owed to my editor at Oneworld Publications, Robin Dennis, for her advice and direction. I also want to thank the marketing and publicity teams at both Oneworld Publications and 45th Parallel Communications, specific ally: Henry Jeffreys, Lamorna Elmer, Alan Bridger, and Jennifer Abel Kovitz. Additional thanks go to Jessica Papin at Dystel & Goderich, who was one of the first people to believe in this book, and to Adam and Lori Simon, who read this book in its infancy and offered valuable feedback.
My meeting with the Odeh family could not have happened without the selfless help and support of countless people, particularly Leah Green of the Compassionate Listening Project, Julie Seltzer, and a number of Israeli and Palestinian activists and individuals who helped behind the scenes, including Mariam and Fakhree. I am grateful to the Odeh family for having the courage to invite me to their home and for warmly welcoming me.
Most of all, we will forever be grateful for the loving support of our family, our friends, and our Pardes community. There are no words to express the journey we have been through together and how much their support, in ways large and small, has meant to us.
Finally, I want to acknowledge the Blutstein and Bennett families, who never left my thoughts during the writing of this book. The memories of Ben and Marla will forever be with us.