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Melissa fished her lipstick and brush from her purse as the car crawled through the winding streets of Charley’s neighborhood on Saturday afternoon. She lowered the sun visor and checked her appearance in the mirror, jerking the tube of color away from her mouth as the car lurched to a stop along an empty space of curb. She sent Keith an impatient look before finishing the task.
“You look beautiful,” he said.
“Thanks.” Melissa snapped her bag closed and reached for the door.
Keith laid a hand on her arm. “Are you going to hate me forever?”
She sat back and studied her husband. “I don’t hate you.”
“Could’ve fooled me. You’ve barely said a complete sentence to me in the last three days. I know you disagree with my methods. I’m sorry about what I did but not why. We need to open a dialog with these people, and you weren’t making any effort.”
“And today isn’t the time or place for that,” she reminded him. Melissa took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been distant or quiet. It’s not all about being upset with you.” She looked away from him and stared at the house, her voice a bit wistful when she continued. “I’ve been playing the what-if game a lot since Charley called.”
“About?”
“What if I’d made a different choice?” She turned back to him. “What if I’d kept my daughter? I mean I know I’d still be sick. I can’t think of a thing that could change that. But if we’d raised her, would it hurt so badly that we couldn’t have one of our own? She would have only been four when we met. I know you would have loved her like your own.”
Keith took her hand.
“Would we be one of those families with a quiet only child, or would our home be the one with the revolving door, filled with noise and chatter as Kinsley’s girlfriends came and went? Would I have been a lion or a lamb sort of mom?”
“A lion or a lamb?”
“You know, fiercely protective and constantly pushing to make certain that my child was the best...had the best, or meekly following in her wake, certain she could do no wrong.”
Keith squeezed her hand. “Either way, you’d have been a good mother.”
She returned the pressure, thawing a bit. “Then there’s the what-if flip side.”
Her husband raised a brow.
“Would I have ruined her life before she was five? I was so messed up back then, trapped in a cycle of self-serving behavior. If it felt good, I overindulged. Drugs, sex, alcohol. Getting pregnant should have been a wakeup call, but if anything, my conduct just degenerated further. It’s a wonder I didn’t miscarry long before Charley found me.”
She turned back to the house, her voice soft. “All these years and I still don’t remember anything about that night. I remember waking up with Charley and Alex standing over me. Charley told me that I’d talked a lot about killing myself.” Melissa closed her eyes and shook her head. Father, thank You for protecting me from myself. “I don’t know. I do know that after spending a month with Charley and Jason, I walked out of that hospital clean and sober and grateful that my child would have the things I couldn’t give her.”
“You gave them a gift,” he said.
“Yes, and they gave me my life back, so maybe it was an even trade. I’ve spent a lot of time convincing myself that I didn’t regret a single minute of the last fifteen years. That God had a different path for me. I never really questioned that until I had lunch with Charley.” She shifted in the seat and pinned him with a determined stare. “I know you have an agenda, Keith. I know what motivates it. I’m not discounting it. But I need some time. I need time to know who Kinsley is. I need time to know who I am with Kinsley. And if taking that time runs me out of time...then we’re both just going to have to be good with that.”
***
CHARLEY HANDED A BOWL of chips to Jason and a stack of cups to Kinsley. “Take these out to the dining room, and I think we’ll be ready.”
“Thanks, Mom. It all looks great. I—” The sound of the doorbell had Kinsley’s head snapping up. She dropped the plastic cups, and they clattered across the tile floor of the kitchen. Her gaze locked onto to Charley’s face. “Is that...?”
Charley looked at the clock and exchanged a look with Jason. “We did ask them to get here at one.”
Jason set the bowl down and put an arm around their daughter. “It’s going to be fine, kiddo. Why don’t you and Mom go answer the door? I’ll gather up the cups and meet you there in a sec.”
Kinsley held her hand out to Charley, a pleading look on her face. Charley laced her fingers with her daughter’s and squeezed. “What Dad said. Take a deep breath.” Once Kinsley complied, Charley gave her a nudge. “Let’s not keep them waiting.”
She led the way to the door, took a deep breath of her own, sent up a prayer, and, with Kinsley on her heels, turned the knob. Melissa stood on the porch, nerves etched on her face, a brightly wrapped gift in her hands.
“Melissa. Right on time.”
Melissa smiled. “Thanks again for inviting us.” A slight quiver showed at the corners of her mouth as Melissa’s eyes cut to Kinsley.
Charley glanced back in time to catch Kinsley’s shy half smile. Tension curled through the air and raked dull talons of resentment across Charley’s heart. Kinsley’s needs, Kinsley’s needs, Kinsley’s needs, she reminded herself.
Melissa motioned to the blond, goateed man standing beside her. “This is my husband, Keith.”
Keith held out his hand and offered Charley a smile that didn’t quite reach his intense hazel eyes. He didn’t say a word when he clasped her hand.
Charley released his hand and took a step back, bumping into Kinsley. “Y’all come on in.” She made room in the entry and pulled Kinsley to her side. A protective gesture or a possessive one? Both, she decided. Years on the police force had made her a decent judge of character. She might not like the situation, but Melissa was someone she knew and trusted. Something about Keith, however, had every maternal alarm she owned clanging a loud red alert. Several awkward seconds passed in silence while she tried to figure out what bothered her about the man. The noise of Jason’s boots on the tile of the entryway broke the spell and pulled her back to the task at hand.
Jason stepped around Charley and pulled Melissa into a quick hug. “Melissa, it’s good to see you again.” He released her, took a step back, and extended a hand to Melissa’s husband. “Jason Hubbard.”
“Keith Emmerson”
Charley watched the interaction between Jason and Keith, only slightly reassured when she didn’t see matching concern on Jason’s face. Her gazed flicked to Kinsley and back to Melissa. The woman and the child studied each other, the younger anxiously, the older with a look of anticipation. Father, if either of these people hurt my child... Charley left the prayer unfinished, steeled herself, and moved so that Kinsley had a half step of open space. She swallowed. “And this is Kinsley.”
Birth mother and daughter stared at each other, obviously not sure what should happen next. Melissa smiled and broke the silence. “Kinsley, that’s a lovely name.” She tilted her head and glanced at Charley. “Have you ever looked it up to see what it means?” When Charley shook her head, Melissa turned back to the teenager. “Well, a girl standing on the edge of womanhood should know that, don’t you think.” She held up her phone. “Do you want to look it up together?”
Kinsley nodded, a genuine smile lighting her face. “Sure, I never really thought about it.”
“What’s your middle name?”
“Janine.”
“We can look that up too.”
The chill in the small space gave way to a spring thaw as the two moved into the living room, huddled close over the tiny screen of Melissa’s phone.
Charley heard her daughter giggle. “I’m a king’s field?” She watched as the two sat beside each other. Melissa cupped Kinsley’s chin in her hand and lifted the girl’s face to hers.
“A beautiful garden filled with bright happy flowers.”
Kinsley’s expression was shy. “Thanks.”
Melissa went back to the screen. “Oh, look. Janine means gift of God.”
Keith stepped around Charley to sit on the sofa next to his wife. “In more ways than one.”
Charley narrowed her eyes at the exasperated look Melissa directed at her husband, uncomfortable once again by something in the man’s attitude.
***
“ARE YOU ABOUT DONE?” Piper asked.
Kinsley glanced over her shoulder and stepped away from the door. She’d just sent the last of her party guests on their way, with the exception of Emma and Piper. Melissa and her husband were still here as well, and that posed a problem.
She leaned back against the door and faced her two best friends. “I don’t think I can go with you guys this afternoon.”
“What?” Emma narrowed her eyes. “I’ve been saving my allowance for a month for this trip to the mall.”
“Me, too,” Piper agreed. “Well, not so much saving, but I did beg my parents for a healthy advance. I told them it was your birthday, and we couldn’t disappoint you. I’ll be doing extra chores for a month. You have to come.”
Kinsley sighed and wrapped her arms around her chest. Her friends had no idea who the extra adults were, and she wasn’t ready to tell them. “You guys start cleaning up the kitchen. That should earn us some points.” She looked at Emma. “Call your mom. I’ll see what I can do.” She watched them go and then shifted her attention to the voices filtering through from the living room. Melissa’s laughter rang out over something her mother had just said.
Her mother... She had two now, and that was still weird. Kinsley remembered her earlier nerves and admitted they’d been silly. They liked each other. Well, she liked Melissa. Keith gave her the heebie-jeebies the way he stared at her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention. She shuddered. He made her feel like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Creepy.
Melissa was different though. She hadn’t tried to force her way into the day or Kinsley’s life. It was as if she understood that even though the invitation to attend had been Kinsley’s idea, it didn’t mean that she wanted to be smothered. She’d been a gentle presence, easy with a smile and an occasional touch of hand or shoulder, quick to answer the few questions Kinsley’d had time to ask, and asking her own questions sparingly. The gift she’d brought was beautiful, and she’d promised a story about it when Kinsley was ready to hear it.
And Kinsley wanted to hear it, just not today. She was tired in a way she’d never been before. Not take-a-nap tired, but tired in her heart. Ditching the adults sounded a little selfish, but getting away from the weirdness of the situation felt right. Keith’s voice echoed down the hall and sent goose bumps skittering up her spine. Yep, she had to get away for a while.
Kinsley pushed away from the door and sidled into the living room. “Mom? Do you remember that Piper, Emma, and I were supposed to go to the mall this afternoon?”
Her mom nodded. “I remember that you mentioned it, but you still have company.”
Melissa put a hand on her mother’s arm. “Adult company that can’t compare to shopping with friends.” She stood and crossed the room. “I’ve enjoyed myself today, Kinsley. Thanks so much for inviting me.” She paused and took something from her pocket, hesitating a beat before handing it to Kinsley. “That’s my address, email, and phone number. Will you call me? Today has been a perfect get acquainted sort of day, but I’d love to talk some more when you’re ready.”
Kinsley looked from Melissa to the note and back. “I’d like that. Thanks for coming today. I know it was a long drive for a two-hour party. I—”
Melissa stopped her with a finger over her lips. “Perfect day,” she said again. “Go have fun with your friends.” She held her arms open and waited for Kinsley to step into the embrace. Once she did, Melissa wrapped her close and whispered into her ear. “Thank you.” They broke apart at a noise in the door.
“Mom’s here,” Emma said.
Kinsley looked at her parents, silently asking for permission to leave.
“Emma’s mother is going with you?” her dad asked.
“She’s dropping us off and picking us up at seven,” Kinsley said.
“That’s fine,” he said. “Don’t leave the mall.”
“And I won’t talk to strangers, I won’t go to the restroom alone, and we’ll stay together,” Kinsley added with a roll of her eyes. Geesh, I’m fifteen not three.
“Skedaddle,” her dad ordered with a grin.
Kinsley skedaddled. She pushed her friends out the front door and down the walk before any of the adults could change their minds. The girls piled into the waiting car and secured their seat belts. Emma’s mom put the car in gear and edged from the curb.
“Wait!” Kinsley yelled, jerking forward as the car came to an abrupt halt. “I left my money in an envelope on the kitchen table.”
Emma’s mom shook her head. “Girl, you scared me to death.” She let the car roll back to the curb. “Hurry up.”
Kinsley climbed out of the car and rounded the yard to the back door. She could go straight to the kitchen without attracting adult attention and further delay. She cracked the door open and tiptoed into the sunny room.
“It was you?”
The words and her mother’s tone of voice froze Kinsley in mid-step. She looked around to see what infraction she might have caused before she caught the sound of adult arguing coming from the living room. They’re fighting about me. Kinsley couldn’t make out the words, but the tenor of the voices drew her down the hall like a salmon to a spawning ground.
She eased herself into a spot outside the door and glued herself to the wall. She’d be caught if anyone left the room, but she didn’t care. She had to know what had stirred up a fight when the afternoon had gone so well.”
“Charley, I know you’re upset,” Melissa said. “You have every right to be. But if we’re to have a relationship, if Kinsley and I are to have a relationship, I didn’t want there to be this...thing between us. What Keith did was wrong, but—”
“I’m standing right here, and I can speak for myself.” Keith’s low growl carried very well into the hall. Kinsley heard shuffling, as if someone were pacing, and she made ready to flee, but when he continued his voice wasn’t near the door. “I’ll apologize if that’s what you’re looking for. I went about things the wrong way. I just...” More shuffling. “I’m against a wall here. We need your help, and Melissa refused to even entertain—”
“Keith.” Melissa’s voice again.
“Help how?” her dad asked.
“It isn’t important,” Melissa said.
“Your life isn’t important?” Keith roared. “How can you continue to brush aside the one option that could save your life?”
Kinsley held her breath in the silence that followed, afraid to breathe for fear they might discover her.
“Hold on,” her mother said. “How is there a connection between your outing Kinsley’s adoption on Instagram and saving Melissa’s life?”
Kinsley’s eyes went round at this revelation. Keith had messaged her? She shuddered. I knew I didn’t like him. Mom and dad were going to tear him apart. She moved an inch closer to the door, not wanting to miss what would happen next.
“Melissa needs a kidney transplant if she hopes to survive this thing. She’s on the donor list, but we haven’t had any luck. The tests that were run on Kinsley a few days ago show that she is unaffected by this disease and that she is a perfect donor.”
Kinsley’s hand covered her mouth at his words. They wanted one of her kidneys. Was this why they’d come today. Disappointment threatened to drown her. She thought back on the day’s events and formed an immediate opinion. Melissa no, Keith yes.
“That isn’t an option.” Melissa’s voice sounded weary as she confirmed Kinsley’s conclusions. “I’ve done my best to talk him out of this nonsense, but he won’t listen.”
“Well, let me help you out.” Kinsley heard rage in her mother’s voice. “No.”
“But—”
“No.” She interrupted Keith. “There is no way that that’s going to happen. Melissa, I love you like a sister, but—”
“I understand, Charley, and I agree with you.”
“I think you should both leave,” her dad said in his no nonsense cop’s voice. “This conversation is over.”
Her face hot and her hands shaking, Kinsley escaped the way she’d come.