CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
Ever’s eyes felt as though someone had ripped them open. The glass dust had settled, and the sounds of shifting debris were quieting, and yet, he could only clutch his eyes. His arm shook as he looked down, half expecting to see blood gushing from his face, the pain was so great. To his relief, however, there was no great flow. Only a few drops of blood sat on his hands where the slivers had fallen from his eyes. The shards of glass themselves were gone.
His relief was short-lived, however, when he looked up at Isa. His wife knelt beside him, looking around with the same dazed expression Ever felt on his own face. Copper strands of her hair waved in the dry, icy wind. Her right cheek was smeared with dried blood, and the wound on her neck was still fresh.
Who had done such a thing? And where was Bronkendol?
The enchanter was nowhere to be seen. Only the island covered in broken glass remained. Enough of the glass had fallen over the edges of the island, into the depths of the void below, that it was possible to see some of the objects that had been inside the castle through the remaining debris. Here and there, shining green and blue in the moonlight, bits and corners of objects and furniture stuck up out of the gleaming rubble.
Joy and alarm exploded within him as he realized that the fire was once again burning within her eyes. From the guarded weariness in those eyes, a terrible feeling as to what had just transpired began to build in his stomach as well. He tried to recall all that had happened, but had to sift through the haze. He remembered rage. Hate as pure and volatile as molten steel had taken hold of his body. The more he considered it, the more he did remember fighting someone. But that had been Bronkendol...
He filtered back through his memories, and saw only her. What had come over him? How could he have been so blind to do such a thing? Such things?
Slowly, so as not to frighten her, Ever reached out and gently took her face in his hands. She made no move to stop him, but watched him warily all the same. The wound just under the hollow of her cheek was easy enough to heal. The cut at her neck was much deeper though. Guilt roared in his ears. Had he pressed any deeper, it would have killed her.
As he worked to heal her, the blue fire thrumming between his fingers, Ever tried to come up with something to say. All he could think to ask, though, was the question that had drawn him to this forsaken wasteland in the first place. That Isa had followed him was enough to give him a shred of hope. But she wouldn’t meet his eyes long enough for him to know for sure.
After five minutes of silence, Ever could stand it no longer. “Are you—”
“Yes.” She still didn’t look at him.
Ever longed to tuck the stray bits of hair behind her ear, but he knew better. So he focused instead on trying to keep her skin from scarring. When he was finally done, he hoped she would speak, but she simply stood up and wandered through the rubble, pushing the broken glass bits around with her foot. When she did speak again, her voice was practiced and distant, statesmanlike.
“Did you see what he did with the mirror?” She spoke without looking at him.
Ever tried to recall. The enchanter had spoken to a little mirror before the rage had overtaken him, but he couldn’t remember what had happened after that. “Not after he spoke to it.”
“He spoke to it?” She finally raised her eyes to his and lifted an eyebrow delicately, but not for long.
“What did he do to me?” Ever hated feeling lost. Even more so, he hated being out of control, and that, he got the feeling, was exactly what had happened to him.
“I think,” Isa spoke slowly, “he is using my power to control the hearts of others. He placed the glass inside of you so that you only saw what he told you to see... or feel. I don’t know. But it seems that he used my power, which was channeled into the mirror, to influence your heart so that you would do as he wished.”
“Of course he did.” Ever groaned and placed his head in his hands. He’d been so blind. It was Isa Bronkendol had been after. And by leaving her alone, Ever had practically handed his wife over on a platter. If only he’d listened to her. “But you can feel again now, even though he took your power?”
This time, she turned and looked right at him, her eyes gazing directly into his. “Yes,” she said quietly. “I can feel again.”
Somehow, that was almost worse than when she couldn’t.
Ever pushed himself to his feet and began to sift through the glass. He found Isa’s sword, and she took it without a word. Before she could walk away again, he grabbed her shoulder.
“I need to know.” He searched her midnight eyes. “Did he touch you?”
Isa’s gaze softened for just a moment. “No. Not in that way.”
Relief filled Ever so that he nearly felt giddy. The question had burned within him since she had been taken. Buoyed with the knowledge, he grew a bit bolder with his questions.
“Why didn’t the glass shards work on you?”
“He pitied me after he took my power, so he removed the glass before he sent me home. He promised me I would never have to suffer the shards again.” Isa stopped searching the debris below and smiled acerbically up at the frigid starry night. “He may scheme to the utmost, but the man has a strange sense of honor. He could have given me more glass anytime, and he didn’t.” Before Ever could ask anything else, she declared their search fruitless. “He most likely escaped before the castle fell, and I know for certain he wouldn’t have left the mirror behind. Let’s go.”
Ever followed in somewhat of a daze. That she was speaking to him at all was encouraging. But her walls were up. Ever sighed. It was their early days at the Fortress all over again.
He didn’t dare speak until they had crossed the stone bridge, which had miraculously survived the castle’s collapse, and had mounted their horses. It hurt to watch as Isa dropped her stiff formality to lean over and whisper musical tones in her horse’s ear. How long had it been since she had shared that same warm smile with him?
Hugon tossed his head and rolled his eyes back to glare at his master, as though demanding to know why Ever wasn’t singing to him, too.
As they set out for the Fortress, back into their world and out of the nightmare of snow and glass, Ever gathered his courage to broach the subject that would either save or break his marriage. They might as well get all of the heartbreak over with at once.
“Isa, I know that you’re angry with me.”
“You are right.” Isa nodded amiably as though they were discussing one of Cook’s new dishes. “But how well do you actually know me? How many hours have you spent with me to know with any confidence what I think or feel, or why I might be angry?”
“What about the time we spent practicing?” Ever stuttered. It was like trying to grasp a fistful of water.
“There was that. It was so kind of you to fit me into your schedule so that we could fight every day.”
“What is this about, Isa?” Everard pulled his horse to a halt and turned to face her. “I am trying to fix this! But I cannot change anything if I don’t know what you want!”
“What I want?” Isa’s eyes finally met his, and though the ring of fire within them was thin, it blazed with heat. “What I want to know is why you are incapable of putting me first! Why I will always come second to your weapons and your allies and your schemes. Even on—”
“A war was about to break out!”
“On our wedding night? Twelve hours, Everard. You couldn’t give me twelve hours before you galloped off to meet the first cry for help that reached your ears, off chasing that next glorious feat.” With that, she urged her horse into a gallop, tears streaming down her face.
Ever followed along, but more slowly. It irked him to know that his ultimate failure hadn’t been the enchanter’s success, nor had it even been any of his idiotic words back at the Cobrien palace. No, this pain had been brewing since the beginning of their marriage. The chink in their relationship had been there all along, beneath every hopeful smile she gave him, each time he’d put her off for a foreign dignitary, or when he’d imprisoned her in her room so he could consult with another queen. As usual, it was his own pigheadedness that had threatened to dash the thing he loved most.
“I am so sorry,” he said into the wind. The words were pathetic, but they were all he had.
Isa didn’t even turn to look at him.
Ever pushed his horse to catch up to her. If his heart hadn’t been contrite already, it shattered completely when he saw the way she now wept. Her cries weren’t silent, as they must have been for so long, but were ragged and broken. Abandoned.
Ever wanted nothing more than to draw her into his arms and hold her until her tears were all gone. He would hold her until they were gone, he decided. Reaching over, he grabbed her horse’s reigns. Then, after hopping off his own horse, he pulled Isa off, too, ignoring her weak protests.
“We will sleep here tonight.”
“It looks cold.” Isa sniffled as she glared at the snow-covered ground.
“It will be cold up on the horses, too. Besides, we won’t be in familiar territory until tomorrow. We might as well get some rest.”
Before she could argue, Ever lifted his hands to his face, palms up. He blew gently but steadily into them until a small blue flame danced within them. Then, with the flick of his wrist, Ever tossed the flame to the ground. The blue flame grew larger, and flitted to the ground, surrounding them, licking up all the snow in its path. It didn’t die until they had a perfectly round patch of dry ground, large enough to fit both the horses, a campfire, and enough space for the two of them to stretch out fully and lie down.
Since they had moved into the lower country, evergreen trees were scattered about. They broke the plains of whiteness in small, uneven clumps. It didn’t take Ever long to find and dry some firewood in the same fashion as he had dried the ground for their camp. Soon enough, a small but warm flame blazed in the center of the circle. As he worked to prepare their supper, Ever watched Isa out of the corner of his eye.
She no longer cried, but the emptiness in her face said it all, and Ever prayed for words to tell her what he felt. If only she could see his intentions, perhaps she could forgive him one day.
“I know it doesn’t change anything.” He handed her a bowl of dried cherries, honey-sweetened bread, and pork, then sat down beside her with his own food. “But I swear, I was only doing what I know best to prove that I love you.” He looked at his bowl to realize his appetite was long gone. “You had just saved me. I was eager to show you my own love in return.”
Isa turned and looked up at him. The anger in her eyes had somewhat lessened, but it had been replaced with dark circles beneath her eyes, as though she hadn’t slept in a week. “But you were never there. How was I supposed to know your love if you were never there?” She dropped her eyes and muttered, “I thought you were avoiding me.”
“Avoiding you?” What on earth had possessed her to think that?
Isa nodded without looking up. “I hadn’t fulfilled my duty to the Fortress. My fire was dying. I just thought that perhaps being gone on official duty was your way of avoiding the subject. If you were off being the king everyone expected you to be, then you wouldn’t have to be embarrassed when someone asked about your inept queen.”
“Is that what you truly think?” Ever put his bowl on the ground and grabbed her face with both hands, forcing her to look at him. Isa bit her lip before nodding as tears came once again to her eyes. Ever pulled her close, holding her as she sobbed quietly into his shirt. How had he muddled things so badly?
“Before we go any further, you need to understand something. My father rarely spent more than five minutes with my mother after I was born. The way he showed his family and the kingdom his devotion was by conquering those that threatened their freedom.” Ever chuckled humorlessly. “You may think I’m gone often, but I am present much more than he ever was.” He pulled back just enough to wipe her eyes with his thumbs. “I’m not strong enough to be without you for that long.”
“As much as you’re absent, you would never know it,” Isa pouted.
“But that’s what I mean! Isa, you grew up with a family that spent time together and built one another up! And thanks to you, I’m learning. But it’s hard to show love in a way you’ve never seen it! Just because I don’t know how to love you doesn’t mean I don’t love you at all.” He gave her a cockeyed smile. “It just shows you what an idiot I am.”
Isa let out a choked sound that seemed part sob and part laugh, and Ever was able to breathe once again. It was the first hint of a smile he’d seen on her face since she’d been taken. Ever leaned over and pulled a thick blanket out of his pack, draping it carefully over them. It would be a long time before he was able to sleep, but the late night air was becoming exceptionally cold. After making sure his sword was positioned well beside him, he reached under the blanket and pulled her closer. Warmth flooded his soul as she snuggled her head in the hollow beneath his chin. Teach me, he begged the Fortress silently, to show her how much I love her! I need her to know what she means to me.
The only sounds were the snaps and pops of the fire as it slowly ate into the firewood, and the songs of the wind as it pushed through the trees and over the snow drifts. The yellow tongues of flame licked the wood, filling the air with a sweet earthy scent that rose and danced into the night air, where it dissipated. A tired silence floated around them for such a long time that Ever was surprised when Isa spoke again.
“It was just so hard to be told time and time again that I was the Fortress’s chosen. That I was the queen everyone had been waiting for. And then months passed. There was no child, and my powers drifted, and you were always gone. I suppose I never really felt the part of a queen after the coronation, nor did I feel like your partner. You were just so good at everything, and it felt like I could nothing right. But worst of all, having what little power I had left ripped from my heart...” she shuddered. “It was like losing the air from my lungs. After Bronkendol sent me away, my heart simply decided it would be easiest to be without feelings at all.”
She turned her face up to gaze into his, and Ever felt his breath catch. How he had hungered to see her look to him with that sweet adoration once more! “Forgive me, Ever?” she whispered.
Before she could say anything else, Ever had drawn her into the kiss he’d been craving for so long. It was pure bliss. There were no curses to be broken, no enchanters to defeat. Only wounds that needed to heal. And it would take time, Ever knew, to heal the wounds they’d inflicted upon one another. But that was alright. They had the rest of their lives to move past this place, and Ever swore then and there to never let her hide from him again.
Ever would have gone on kissing her forever, but Isa pulled away, a small frown on her face.
“I’m still not sure where to go from here. I mean,” she stared at her hands, “a little of my power returned at the Glass Castle, but only just a little.”
Ever placed his forehead against hers. “Honestly? I don’t know. This is new for me, too.” He picked up her left hand and traced circles on her finger, around the crystal ring she always wore. “My father and I were close, but either he was king or I was. I’ve never had a partner before. And I mean it when I say I’ve never needed anyone so much.” He tipped her chin up, drinking her beauty in. Her hair was mussed and there were deep shadows beneath her eyes, but never had she been so lovely. “You may think I’m strong,” he whispered, “but I don’t know how to go on without you. I may be Destin’s sword, but you are the heart. I cannot tell what the Fortress has in store for you, but you are too rare a woman for its choice to have been an accident.”
For the first time, a wide, radiant smile shone from her face, and an all-too-familiar yearning filled Ever as her flame-rimmed midnight eyes stared up into his. He began to pull her in again for another kiss, but she gently placed her fingertips on his lips.
He must have looked pathetic, for Isa let out a laugh, her blue eyes sparkling.
“You can have all the kisses you want in a minute, but your queen needs something from you first.”
“The king will do all that is within his power and more,” he said somberly as he lifted her fingers to his lips and bowed his head. “For he is under your spell.”
Isa giggled again, then looked as if she was trying to be serious. “If you truly mean it when you believe I was meant to be queen, I need you to trust me to be your partner. You can’t keep hiding me away like a little doll.”
Ever frowned. “I nearly just lost you. That is going to be difficult to do.”
But Isa patiently shook her head. “I know I have much to learn, but if I’m truly meant to wield the Fortress’s power, you must trust the Fortress to protect me.” She sat back a little. “You also need to consider me your partner. I like Queen Kartek. She’s intelligent and kind, but,” Isa leaned forward with a knowing look, “she is not your queen, and she has said as much herself. In the future, I need for you to confide in me.”
Ever drew in a sharp lungful of frigid air before letting out an annoyed huff. “You don’t know how much you ask of me.” He leaned forward also. “I can’t lose you again.”
“By ignoring my call, you nearly did lose me already.”
They watched one another for a long time. She was right, but Ever hated to admit it. Allowing her to face evil by his side was going to be the most difficult challenge he had ever undertaken. His concentration was broken, however, when she slipped him a little mischievous smirk.
“If it’s going to be that hard, I’ll just have to convince you.”
He started to ask her how she was going to do that, when her arms wrapped themselves around him, and her lips were suddenly on his. He pulled back enough to groan.
“That’s not fair.”
She smiled into his kiss. “It’s not supposed to be. Now, hush. Your queen commands it.” And before Ever could protest, she kissed him again.