I closed my eyes waiting for the blow, but it never came. When I opened them, I saw no anger in my mother’s face.
I took her hand. ‘I missed you. But I had to come. I had to have my chance, and tomorrow I will.’
She spoke for the first time.‘I have opened up the house and lit the fires. Come home now, Billy. Wash and put on clean clothes. You smell like a street child.’
‘But I am working, Mother.’ I took a deep breath. ‘Tomorrow I am to play a bystander, on stage.’
‘Wonderful.’ She did not sound thrilled. This was hardly surprising as she never liked me being at the playhouse. I wondered, just for a moment, hadn’t Father ever talked to her about following your heart?
‘You will work better after good hot food,’ she said. ‘Come. Susan longs to see you.’
I fancied I could smell beef stew on her clothing. Suddenly, I yearned for comfort.
‘I’m glad Susan is well,’ I said. ‘I have kept her in my prayers.’
I hadn’t, which made me feel doubly bad.
I found old John Merry and explained where I was going.
‘I’m right glad your mother is back,’ he said. ‘I hope she is not too angry with you.’
‘She is not angry at all,’ I said happily.
Life was good. I was going to have my home again, and I would play my first part in public the very next day.
I called Hoppy and we all three set off for home. The weather was bright and clear. I decided I would pray for good weather on the morrow. If it was too wet, there would be no performance.
As we walked, I noticed grass and weeds growing among the cobbles. ‘What has happened to the road?’ I asked.
‘So many people left London because of the plague that the roads have not been well used,’ replied my mother. ‘Even though the plague is officially over, it does not mean that it’s not still here.’
I noticed that she carried a pomander of herbs and spices, which she held to her nose whenever the path grew crowded. She was still afraid of catching plague.
I saw more signs of the disease. Houses with windows boarded up against thieves, and doors with red crosses painted on them.
We turned into Little Thames Lane, and I saw smoke rising from our chimney. How good it felt to see our own house! Hoppy’s new home!
Mother opened the door. I stood inside and sniffed familiar smells: fire smoke, food cooking, lavender, and herbs mixed in with floor rushes, crushed beneath my feet. Our rooms were bigger and airier than Aunt Meg’s, and our furniture shone, whereas hers was roughened wood. Through a room at the back I glimpsed our garden, where everything had grown while we had been away. Roses had gone wild, rambling over dried-looking bean plants.
I heard a key turn and the clunk of a lock.
I spun round. Mother had locked the door.
She put the key in the pocket she wore inside her kirtle and said in a cold, hard voice. ‘How … dare … you!’
‘Wha— what?’
‘How DARE you run away and cause me such agony? I thought my heart would break. You disappeared without a word. How … DARE you!’
She thumped the table with clenched fists.
I backed away.
‘Did you give one thought to what your aunt and uncle and I would think? We didn’t know if you had been attacked and left to freeze in a ditch. We didn’t know if you were murdered. How could you leave like that?’
‘But – but I left a letter,’ I protested. ‘Did you not see it?’
‘What letter? I saw no letter.’
‘It was in pictures,’ I said. ‘It explained where I was going, and it ended with the pictures that said, “I love you”… and I do,’ I added, hoping to calm her. ‘I left it on the table.’
‘Then whoever picked it up would have assumed it was one of the drawings you always left around the place. I only discovered where you were when we received Master Shakespeare’s letter.’ She threw a log on the fire. ‘Go and see Susan, then go to your bedroom. There is water there. Wash yourself and put on fresh clothes.’
‘Yes, Mother.’
‘Then come down and help with the cleaning. Spiders and mice have moved in while we’ve been away, and I want neither in this house.’
‘Yes, Mother.’
My sister was fast asleep with a strange curly-haired girl beside her.
‘Who are you?’ I asked.
‘Nelly,’ she said. ‘Your mother’s new maid. You’re Billy.’
I stared at her. ‘I know.’
‘I got to keep an eye on you,’ she said, making both pale eyes round and staring.
I decided she was daft, and turned to Susan. She looked much better than when I saw her last. I stroked her cheek. Her little hand touched mine.
‘Billy,’ she said, and I thought she smiled a little.
When I was clean, I went downstairs. The rest of the day passed in a flurry of brooms and wet cloths and anger in the air.
Finally we stopped for a bowl of stew and fresh bread. It was delicious. When I was full, I tried to start a conversation.
‘How was your journey home, Mother?’
She had calmed, but I could see she was still angry.
‘I will talk to you in the morning,’ she said. ‘Go to bed.’
As I turned towards the stairs I found Nelly sitting on the third step, staring at me.
‘What are you doing?’ I asked.
‘Keeping an eye on you,’ she replied, and followed me to the door of my room.
‘I hope you can see through wood,’ I said, slamming the door in her face.
Her footsteps faded, then I heard my mother’s footsteps coming closer.
A key turned.
I was locked in!
‘Mother!’ I called. ‘Why have you locked me in?’
‘You ran away,’ she said. ‘You must be punished.’
‘But you’ll let me out in the morning?’ I asked.
There was no reply.
‘Mother!’ I said frantically. ‘The play 1s tomorrow!’
She’d gone. I sat on the bed with my head in my hands.
The next thing I heard was scuffling at the door, then Nelly’s spiteful voice whispered, ‘No plays for you.’