THE NEXT MORNING, after dropping Sienna at nursery school, Sophie drove to Jamie’s office rather than her own. He’d clearly briefed Karen, the head of his HR department, who showed her to the interview room and brought her coffee and a jug of water.
All the candidates on the shortlist were good and would fit in well with her team, but by the end of the interviews Sophie had two definite choices. She just needed to run them by Jamie first. She texted him.
Can I talk to you for five minutes re interviews?
He called her back immediately. ‘Sure. Do you have time for lunch?’
‘You actually take a lunch break?’ she asked.
‘Usually it’s a sandwich at my desk,’ he admitted. ‘But it’s probably a better idea to be away from the building if you want to discuss the interviews.’
‘Okay.’
‘You don’t usually have a lunch break, either, do you?’ he asked.
‘Busted. Same as you,’ she admitted.
‘Meet you in the lobby in five minutes,’ he said.
She thanked Karen for her help, promised to give her a final answer in an hour’s time, and went to meet Jamie in the lobby.
‘There’s a nice café round the corner,’ he said.
‘That sounds good.’
She let him shepherd her out to the café, where they ordered coffee and sandwiches, and found a quiet corner table.
‘So how did it go?’ he asked.
‘They were all good candidates. But two of them stood out for me. I just wanted to run them by you to see what you thought.’ She passed him the files.
‘Good choice. That’s who I would’ve picked,’ he said.
‘So it’s a two-month secondment?’
‘If that gives you enough time.’
‘Just about. Thanks. Though we need to sort out salary payments and what have you.’
‘Karen can advise you on the details,’ he said.
‘So that’s number one ticked off the list,’ she said. ‘Now for number two.’
‘Number two?’
‘What we discussed last night.’
* * *
When he’d asked her to help him.
When he’d finally admitted that he was struggling to be a dad and hated that he was getting it so wrong. Jamie hadn’t told her yet just why he found it so hard, but he would. In a few days. The more time he spent with her, the more he found himself trusting her. Eva was right about Sophie being utterly reliable.
But there was more to her than that. Something that he couldn’t let himself think about. So he’d have to keep it strictly business, for his daughter’s sake.
‘Firstly,’ she said, ‘I think we need to rejig your routine so you always eat dinner with Sienna.’
‘What if something really big crops up at the office—something that only I can deal with?’ he asked.
‘Something that big won’t happen every month, let alone every day,’ she said. ‘Okay. If there’s a major crisis, then you call in advance and you explain it to her at her level.’
So he’d be eating dinner with Sienna every night. Seeing Fran’s face in hers, and feeling the guilt twist in his gut. But he knew Sophie was right. For Sienna’s sake, he needed to do this.
‘Secondly,’ she said, ‘you need to do the bedtime story every night, because it’s good for children to have a male role model as well as a female one when it comes to reading.’
‘That sounds like something your sister-in-law would say,’ he said.
‘Got it in one,’ she informed him cheerfully.
And how strange that the twinkle in her eye made his heart feel as if it had done a flip. Apart from the fact that that was anatomically impossible, it was totally inappropriate. Sophie was his business partner and temporary nanny. He shouldn’t blur the boundaries and make this personal.
‘Thirdly, from what I can make out, Sienna gets looked after by the nanny at weekends.’
‘Yes.’ He flapped a dismissive hand. ‘Because I have to work.’
‘Not every single hour of every single day, you don’t. You need to learn to delegate,’ she said. ‘If you’re going to build a bond with Sienna, you need to spend time with her—and that means doing things with her at weekends.’
He went cold. Getting really involved. Getting close to someone else he could lose with no warning. And he was like his own parents; he wasn’t a natural at dealing with children. He didn’t know how to relate to them. Plus he loathed all the tears, tantrums and screaming that seemed to go hand in hand with the playground. ‘Please don’t suggest I should take her to one of those play places.’
‘Play places?’ She looked baffled.
‘You know the sort I mean—the ones kids get invited to for birthday parties. The places with a ball pit and slides and what feels like wall-to-wall screaming.’ He’d always hated them and had persuaded Fran to take Sienna to them while he escaped gratefully to the office.
Sophie grinned. ‘They’re not that bad.’
‘Yes, they are,’ he said feelingly.
She looked at him, her dark eyes widening. ‘Hang on. Are you telling me that Sienna never goes to birthday parties?’
‘Of course she does.’
She folded her arms. ‘But?’
‘Fran used to take her. Cindy takes her now,’ he admitted.
‘Okay. Well, doing things with her that you hate probably isn’t the best idea. Scratch the play places, but there are other things you can do. You could start with the park on a Sunday morning—even if you just go for a walk and talk about what you see there, which dogs she likes and that sort of thing. Though Hattie and Sam love the swings and the slide, and if you time it right the play area in the park isn’t usually that crowded.’
‘Right.’ He didn’t believe a word of it.
‘And it’s Bonfire Night this weekend,’ she said. ‘I did a bit of research last night, and there are a few firework displays scheduled around here on Saturday night, including one at a local infants’ school. I’ll email you the details.’
‘Bonfire Night.’ Fran had loved fireworks. They’d had fireworks at their wedding. And Jamie had avoided them ever since Fran’s death. Fireworks were the last thing he wanted to see.
‘It’ll be fun,’ Sophie said.
No, it wouldn’t. It would be hell.
‘The school display is probably your best bet. It’ll be small, they usually have quieter fireworks so the younger ones aren’t scared by loud bangs, and there will be stalls with hot dogs and hot chocolate and glowies.’
‘Glowies?’ he asked, mystified.
She smiled. ‘Necklaces, wands, tiaras and glowsticks. Kids of Sienna’s age absolutely love them.’
‘How do you know all this stuff?’
‘Because I went to a firework display with Hattie last year. And it’s worth giving in and buying everything on the stall that she likes, because there’s no chance of losing Sienna for even a second in the crowd if she’s lit up like a firework herself.’
‘Got you,’ he said. And maybe she had a point. Maybe it was time he faced his demons once and for all. Fireworks and Fran and guilt. ‘All right.’ He paused. ‘Are you busy on Saturday night?’
‘I’m supposed to be catching up with work. Though I guess I can move things round,’ she said carefully.
It would be unfair of him to ask her, especially as he knew she was the kind of person who put herself out to help people and would find it hard to say no. But he couldn’t face doing this all on his own. Being the single dad, seeing the pity and sympathy in people’s eyes—pity he didn’t want, and sympathy he didn’t deserve. ‘Would you come with us?’ he asked. ‘Please?’
‘Okay,’ she said. Just as he’d known she would.
‘I know I’m taking time out of things you’d want to do for your own business,’ he said. ‘And maybe I can help a bit with that.’ Remembering what she’d insisted on as part of their agreement, he added swiftly, ‘Not interfering. More like being a sounding board.’ As she was kind of acting for him, where Sierra was concerned.
‘A sounding board,’ she said.
‘Someone to bounce ideas off. Someone to listen. And you could even delegate some stuff to me.’ He paused. ‘Tell me about the Weddings Abroad thing.’ Where business was concerned, he felt much more at home, He knew what he was doing. There were no emotions to mess things up.
‘It came out of the event management,’ she said. ‘We plan all kinds of events, from corporate to personal—product launches, conferences, birthday parties and weddings. One of my brides was in tears, a fortnight before her wedding, because there were so many family arguments and everyone was being difficult and refusing to agree on anything. She said to me she wished she and her partner had decided to elope to Cuba instead, and actually asked me if I could cancel everything and arrange it.’
He smiled, guessing that she would’ve risen to the challenge. ‘Did you?’
‘No. I brokered a few agreements instead—a few compromises, so the bride got her happy day and the ones who were being difficult agreed to put their differences aside and be polite to each other for the wedding and the reception.’
Typical Sophie, he was beginning to realise. Fixing things quietly and sensibly, without a fuss.
Was that what she was doing with him and Sienna?
‘But it made me think. Some people have difficult families, and others are maybe missing loved ones and would find it hard to have a traditional wedding in England without them. Having a wedding abroad would solve all those problems. So I looked into it, and found out what paperwork you need in each of a dozen different countries, how much time you need to allow for arrangements, and who to contact. Between us, Eva and I have the admin, the venues, cakes, flowers and dresses sorted.’ She lifted a shoulder. ‘It’s just a shame that Eva’s not going to be here to help launch the new service.’
‘And you arrange the honeymoon as well?’
‘And the hen night and stag night, if that’s what my clients want.’
While she was talking about the project, Sophie was really glowing, Jamie thought. She was clearly one of these people who liked being able to wave a magic wand for people and make things better.
She was already making a difference to himself and Sienna—something he hadn’t expected and was incredibly grateful for, even if at the same time it made him a bit antsy.
She glanced at her watch. ‘Sorry. I tend to get a bit carried away when I talk about my pet project.’
‘That’s okay.’ He’d enjoyed seeing her all animated. Though he couldn’t help wondering why she was single. She was beautiful, she was nice, and she had an enormous heart. Why hadn’t someone snapped her up years ago?
‘I guess we ought to be getting back,’ she said. ‘But one last thing before we go—Cindy.’
‘What about her?’
‘If I were her,’ she said carefully, ‘I’d be worried sick about Sienna.’
‘I’ve already spoken to Cindy. She knows Sienna’s in good hands, her job is still there when she’s ready to come back to it, and I’m still paying her full salary so she’s not struggling financially.’
‘That isn’t the same as seeing Sienna for herself,’ Sophie said. ‘And I’ve been thinking about this from Sienna’s point of view. Please don’t think I’m trying to trample on a sore spot, but her mum didn’t come back from a holiday. And now her long-term nanny hasn’t come back from a holiday. I think she needs to see Cindy for herself, so she knows it really is a broken leg and you’re not trying to break bad news to her gently.’
That had never occurred to him, and it felt like a punch in the stomach. ‘I...’ He blew out a breath. ‘Yes. You’re right.’
‘So would you mind talking to Cindy and asking her to call me, so I can arrange to take Sienna over to see her?’
How could he possibly say no to that? ‘Sure.’
‘Good.’ She smiled at him. ‘I’ll see you this evening. We have fajitas for dinner tonight.’
He frowned. ‘Fajitas. Are you sure Sienna—’
‘Yes. I won’t make them overly spicy. They’re one of Hattie’s favourites, and she’ll love them,’ Sophie reassured him. ‘I’ll walk back to the office with you because I need to talk to Karen. Thank you for lunch.’
‘Pleasure.’ And, to his surprise, he found it was. He hadn’t just been polite. It was the first time since Fran had died that he’d had lunch on his own with a woman who wasn’t related to him or doing business with him. This wasn’t officially a date—but it wasn’t entirely a business meeting, either.
And that evening, when Jamie went home, it actually felt like coming home. He found himself looking forward to Sienna running to greet him, to the scent of home-made food—to the sheer warmth of the place, something that had been missing for far too long. At the same time, it threw him; it made him feel less in control.
He washed his hands under Sienna’s directions, then walked hand in hand with her into the kitchen, where Sophie was busy at the stove. ‘What can I do to help?’
‘Sit and enjoy,’ Sophie said, putting the serving dishes in the middle of the table.
Without a word to Sophie, he helped Sienna load her tortilla with lightly spiced chicken, peppers, onion, salsa and guacamole. Sophie’s smile said she’d noticed and approved.
It had been a long, long time since he’d found himself enjoying a family meal—and it was all thanks to Sophie. So, he thought, was the sparkle in his daughter’s eyes.
Maybe he could do this.
Maybe he could be a dad.
Maybe he could be the family his daughter deserved.
‘So how was your day?’ he asked Sienna, and was treated to a blow-by-blow account of her day at nursery and helping Sophie mix the spices for the chicken. It shocked him a little, because he’d never heard so many words from her in one go.
‘And we’re going to see Cindy on Saturday,’ Sienna finished, beaming. ‘We’re going to make her a special card and a cake.’
Clearly Cindy had returned Sophie’s call. ‘That sounds good,’ he said.
When they’d finished dinner, Sophie said, ‘Bathtime now, Sienna.’
Dread coursed through him. Sophie had let him off the previous evening. Was she going to make him do bathtime tonight?
‘And Daddy will need to wash your hair,’ Sophie added.
He felt sick. But, short of telling her the truth about how he felt and why, he had no choice but to get on with it.
‘Remember to put a facecloth over your eyes, Sienna, so you don’t get any shampoo in them,’ Sophie said.
He hadn’t even considered that. What kind of rubbish father did that make him?
Gritting his teeth and trying not to let his tension show, for Sienna’s sake, he took his daughter up to the bathroom. He ran a shallow bath—though at least tonight she didn’t call him on it. Rinse, lather, rinse, lather, he told himself. And he managed it—thankfully because Sienna had a facecloth over her eyes she couldn’t see the pain in his face when he looked at her wet curls. But he managed to dry her off, comb out the tangles and dry her hair. And when he’d finished the bedtime story, she wrapped her arms round his neck.
‘Love you, Daddy.’
‘Love you, too.’ And he hoped she couldn’t hear the crack in his voice.
* * *
‘Thank you,’ he said to Sophie when he’d settled Sienna to bed and come downstairs again.
‘Just doing my job,’ she said.
‘Since you won’t let me pay you for looking after her,’ he said softly, ‘you’re doing me a favour rather than it being a job.’
‘It’s not about the money,’ she said, flapping a dismissive hand. ‘It’s a quid pro quo. You need help; so do I. We’re simply helping each other out.’
‘All I’ve done is set the legal wheels in motion to buy out Eva’s share.’
‘And lent me two members of staff.’
‘Karen tells me you’re insisting on paying them, so that doesn’t count.’
‘It’s fine,’ she said.
‘Actually, it’s not. I feel as if I’m taking unfair advantage of you,’ he countered.
She gave a hollow laugh. ‘Trust me, you’re not.’
That laugh alerted him. ‘Sounds like experience talking.’
She looked away. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘I think it does,’ he said softly. ‘Come and sit down. Talk to me.’
She shook her head. ‘It’s the proverbial hill of beans that doesn’t matter.’
‘Casablanca,’ he said.
‘Yes. Not that it was a Rick and Ilsa thing in my case,’ she added dryly. ‘Let’s just say where business is concerned, I’m a good judge of character—but where my love life’s concerned, I’m not so good.’
So who had taken advantage of her? he wondered. Whatever had happened had clearly hurt her deeply.
But she was already gathering her belongings. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘See you tomorrow,’ he echoed.
And how strange that the light seemed to dim when she closed the door behind her.
* * *
The rest of the week followed a similar pattern for Sophie: picking up Sienna, dropping her at nursery, cramming in as much work as she could before nursery pick-up, then making dinner for the three of them. Jamie was clearly getting more used to the bedtime routine, doing bathtime and story time with a bit less reluctance, and Sophie loved the fact that he and Sienna were getting closer.
On Saturday morning, she’d agreed that Jamie could spend the morning in the office while she and Sienna went to see Cindy. They made a cake first thing and decorated it with pink sugar hearts, butterflies and sparkly sprinkles. Sienna had made a get well soon card, the night before, and Sophie had helped her to write the words inside.
Cindy buzzed them in through the intercom, and Sienna practically ran inside to hug the woman sitting in the chair with a cast on her leg and crutches propped up beside her. ‘Cindy!’
‘Oh, sweetie, I’ve missed you!’ Cindy said, holding the little girl tightly.
‘I missed you, too. Daddy said you broke your leg.’
‘I fell over on my skis,’ Cindy explained, ‘and it’s going to take a few weeks for my leg to get better. That’s why the doctor put the big plaster on it.’ She gestured to her cast.
‘Sophie’s looking after me until your leg’s better,’ Sienna said. ‘And we made you a cake.’
Cindy blinked in surprise. ‘You did cooking?’
‘Me and Sophie cook tea every night, and Daddy eats it all up, every little bit.’
Cindy raised an eyebrow at Sophie. ‘Really?’
‘Really,’ Sophie confirmed with a smile. ‘Nice to meet you at last, Cindy.’
‘And you, Sophie.’ Cindy shook her hand.
‘When you rang, you said there was a park nearby,’ Sophie said. ‘Maybe I could push you there in your wheelchair, so you can get some fresh air and Sienna can run around and go on the slide, and work up an appetite for a slice of that cake.’ And it also meant she’d be able to talk to Cindy privately without Sienna overhearing.
‘Sounds good,’ Cindy said, clearly guessing exactly what Sophie meant.
‘I made you a card, too,’ Sienna said, shoving it into Cindy’s hand.
‘It’s beautiful,’ Cindy said when she opened it. ‘A rainbow and a dog. That’s lovely. And your writing’s very neat.’
‘Sophie helped me,’ Sienna confided in a loud whisper. ‘Sophie’s really kind.’
Cindy gave Sophie an appraising look, and nodded. ‘That’s good. Shall we go to the park? You can help Sophie push my chair.’
‘Yay!’ Sienna said.
Once they were at the park and seated where they could see Sienna playing on the slide and the swings, Cindy turned to Sophie. ‘I can already see the change in her. You’re good for her. And I’m so glad you brought her over to see me. I was worrying about her having a string of temps.’
‘Jamie was pretty insistent that he wanted continuity,’ Sophie said. ‘The agency let him down. Apparently everyone on their books was either already on an assignment or had gone down with that virus that’s doing the rounds. Jamie was pretty angry about it.’
‘So how do you know Mr Wallis, exactly?’ Cindy asked.
‘I co-own a business with Fran’s cousin, Eva. Eva’s fiancé has been headhunted, so she needs me to buy her out. I needed someone to invest, and Jamie needed a nanny,’ Sophie explained. ‘Although I’m not a qualified nanny, I had a part-time job in our neighbour’s nursery school during sixth form. I have a niece who’s the same age as Sienna and a nephew two years younger, and I’m a very hands-on aunt. Plus my sister-in-law’s a health visitor, so I can ask her anything I need to. So this a kind of quid pro quo. I’m looking after Sienna, and Jamie’s buying into my company.’
‘I see,’ Cindy said.
‘I have to say, you’re not what I was expecting,’ Sophie said. ‘Not after reading that file.’
Cindy groaned. ‘The rules.’
‘Which I’m guessing are Jamie’s rather than yours.’
‘I just wrote Sienna’s routine down.’ Cindy sighed. ‘It’s not what I want it to be. It just kind of evolved, and Mr Wallis is a bit set in his ways. But from the sound of things you’re not sticking to it.’
‘No, I’m not,’ Sophie agreed. ‘I guess the difference is I’m not actually working for him, so I can call things as I see them without any worry that I’m going to lose my job.’
‘It’s not so much losing my job I worry about,’ Cindy said, ‘as not being able to look after Sienna any more. I’ve looked after her since she was a baby.’
And she clearly loved the little girl dearly, Sophie thought. ‘So you knew her mum, then. What was Fran like?’
‘Lovely—a real dynamo, but she always made time for Sienna. Mr Wallis was different when she was around. He wasn’t quite so much of a workaholic because she could always get him to stop and smell the roses.’
‘Hang on. He still makes you call him Mr Wallis after four years?’ Sophie checked.
‘Fran was the one I saw most of,’ Cindy said, ‘and Mr Wallis was always more formal with me. Though don’t get me wrong. I have a lot of respect for him, He’s a fair employer and he lets me take my holiday to suit me.’ She gestured to her leg. ‘And he’s still paying me, even though I can’t work.’
Money isn’t everything, Sophie thought. ‘Just he’s totally buttoned up.’
‘Losing your wife at such a young age is hard.’
‘But it doesn’t give you a good excuse to avoid your daughter and make your nanny look after her all the time,’ Sophie said quietly.
‘I think,’ Cindy said, ‘it’s because Sienna’s the spitting image of her mum and he finds it hard to cope. Every time he sees Sienna it must remind him of Fran and what he’s lost, and he kind of buries himself in work to help him cope. Plus Fran once let it slip that he was pretty much brought up by nannies as well, in a house where children were meant to be seen and not heard.’
‘So I’m also guessing he doesn’t see much of Fran’s family?’
‘They live in Norfolk.’
‘That’s only a couple of hours’ drive away. If he didn’t want to make a weekend of it, he could still let her see her grandparents for the day.’ She paused. ‘Are you in contact with them?’
Cindy looked wary. ‘Why?’
‘Don’t worry, I’m not going to march over to Jamie and blab,’ Sophie said. ‘My dad was a workaholic who died young, so I kind of know what it’s like to be in Sienna’s shoes. And I think she needs her extended family.’
‘Agreed,’ Cindy said.
‘So I was thinking, sending them bits of Sienna’s artwork and the odd photograph might be a way of starting to bridge the gap.’
‘We’re there already,’ Cindy said. ‘On my phone, I have addresses, phone numbers and email addresses—which I could accidentally copy to you while I update the grandmas on what’s happening with Sienna.’
‘Accidentally sounds perfect,’ Sophie said with a smile. ‘And that means they’ll know to expect contact from me, too.’
‘So you’ve actually got him eating dinner with Sienna?’
‘And doing the bedtime story. He’s done bathtime for the last three nights, too.’
‘You,’ Cindy said with a grin, ‘are either a genius or you own a real magic wand.’
Sophie smiled. ‘I’m just bossier than his mother.’
Cindy laughed. ‘Now that I don’t believe. When you send Mrs Wallis photos and artwork, be prepared for a tide of advice and a bit of criticism in return.’ She looked at Sophie. ‘Though if you’ve achieved dinner, bath and bedtime story in a week, you might just be a match for her.’
‘I’ll keep you posted with how things go,’ Sophie said. ‘And we’re going to a firework display tonight.’
‘Just you and Sienna?’
‘No. All three of us.’
‘You definitely have a magic wand,’ Cindy said. She smiled. ‘Next you’ll be telling me you’ve got him to do messy stuff.’
‘That,’ Sophie said, ‘is an excellent idea. We’ll start with glitter, I think.’
Cindy’s smile widened. ‘Now I know Sienna’s in good hands.’
‘She is,’ Sophie promised.
* * *
That evening, they walked to the firework display at the local infants’ school. Sienna was all wide-eyed and excited. ‘We’re seeing real fireworks, Daddy?’
‘Yes, we are.’ He masked his expression of pain almost instantly, but Sophie had seen it. What was so bad about fireworks? But now wasn’t the time or the place to ask.
They wandered round the stalls together, each holding one of Sienna’s hands. At the stall selling glow-sticks, necklaces and wands, he bought one of everything for his daughter.
‘You and Sophie need to have a necklace, too,’ she insisted.
‘These are on me,’ Sophie said with a grin. She cracked the stick and curved it round, fixing it with the connector at the back of Jamie’s neck.
‘It’s pink, just like mine!’ Sienna said in delight.
He cracked the stick of Sophie’s necklace and sorted out her connector, and Sophie was very aware of the way her skin tingled when his fingertips brushed against her. ‘Yellow. You look as if your halo’s slipped,’ he murmured in her ear, and the tingle spread down her spine.
In another life...
But they were strictly business associates, she reminded herself.
‘We need to take pictures to send to Cindy.’ And to the grandmothers, she thought. Jamie duly crouched down to be on Sienna’s level, and Sophie took a couple of shots on her camera.
‘We need a picture with you, too,’ Sienna said.
She crouched down on the other side of Sienna to take a photograph of the three of them together. And just for a moment they looked like a family...
But that wasn’t part of the deal.
And even if she was in the market for a relationship—which she wasn’t—Jamie Wallis wasn’t Mr Right. It was way too complicated.
As if Jamie, too, was slightly discomfited by that picture, he shepherded them over to the food stalls and distracted Sienna with hot chocolate and a hot dog. And when the firework display started, he actually lifted Sienna onto his shoulders so she could see the display better.
Sophie could hear the oohs and ahhs of people around them as the fireworks burst into the sky; it was a magical display, but there was something even more magical going on right next to her, with Jamie finally starting to act like a father instead of a reserved guardian.
Sienna chatted all the way home, still holding both their hands, clearly thrilled about the fireworks.
‘Will you stay for a coffee or a glass of wine?’ Jamie asked.
‘Coffee, please,’ Sophie said, ‘as I’m driving. Do you want me to make the coffee while you get Sienna into bed?’
‘That’d be good. Thanks.’
Once she’d made the coffee, Sophie could hear him reading the bedtime story. His resonant and slightly posh voice reminded her of a Shakespearean actor she’d had a crush on for years. Sienna was clearly enjoying every second of it because Sophie could hear delighted giggles.
How much this house had changed in the last week.
Though they still had a long way to go.
She’d just sent the photo of Jamie and Sienna to Cindy when Jamie came into the living room. ‘Thank you,’ he said. ‘Tonight was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be, because of you.’
‘What was so difficult about going to a fireworks display?’ she asked.
‘Fran loved fireworks,’ he said simply.
And she’d brought up all the memories. Brought back all the loss. Guilt flooded through her. ‘I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have pushed you to go if I’d known.’
‘For Sienna’s sake, I’m glad you did. Plus it was time I faced it. I can’t keep depriving her of all the things Fran loved, just because it’s hard for me.’
It amazed Sophie that he had such insight—but she was glad for Sienna’s sake that he could see it.
He raised his cup of coffee at her. ‘And thank you for this, too.’
‘No problem.’
‘So I was wondering...how did you and Eva start the business?’
‘Event planning and travel agencies aren’t so far apart,’ she said. ‘I’d worked for an events company during the university holidays and they offered me a job when I graduated; it was the same for Eva with the travel agency side. And then I think we both got to the point where we realised we were stuck and we had next to no chance of getting promoted unless we moved to a different company. We were talking one night and realised how much the two businesses had in common. We’d both saved money, planning to buy a flat, but we put the money into the business instead. And I’m glad we did.’ She paused. ‘What about you?’
He lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug. ‘My family’s in the hotel trade, so it was always on the cards that I’d either work for them or set up on my own in a similar line of business. I was working for my parents when a former stately home came up for sale. There was a lot of land with it, including a wood, and it was the perfect place to develop as a resort offering activity holidays. I’d inherited money from my grandparents, so Fran and I talked about it and decided we’d go for it. We bought the property and got planning permission to build log cabins in the grounds. We built a pool and developed cycle trails and nature trails through the woods, and there’s a lake where people can go fishing. And from there we developed a couple more.’
‘I’ve stayed at one of your resorts,’ Sophie said. ‘We went for a hen weekend.’
‘Not your cup of tea?’ he asked.
‘Going for a long walk in the woods in torrential rain is maybe not the most fun thing I’ve ever done,’ she said. ‘But I did appreciate your spa area afterwards.’
‘I’m glad.’ He smiled. ‘That was Fran’s idea. She said not everyone liked doing outdoor stuff and we needed something for rainy days as well, so we’ve got a roster of tutors and we run specialist creative courses—everything from photography and art to creative writing and crafts, cake decorating and pottery. And we listen to what our guests suggest, too. If there’s a trend in their comments, that’s something we know we need to add or change.’
‘Again, not so far away from what we do at Plans & Planes,’ Sophie said. ‘So how many resorts do you have now?’
‘Four in England, one in Italy, one in the South of France where we offer a short course in perfume-making—that was one of Fran’s last ideas. And we were thinking of developing one in the Caribbean, but...’ He tailed off and shook his head. ‘Not after Fran died. I couldn’t bear to go back.’
She could see the pain in his eyes. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I shouldn’t have asked. This must be difficult for you.’
He grimaced. ‘I’m being maudlin. I’ll shut up.’
‘Maybe,’ she said, ‘talking about her will help.’
‘Nothing helps,’ he said, and she could see the loneliness in his face.
How could she just let him sit there and suffer?
So she walked over to the sofa, sat down beside him and wrapped her arms round him.
She knew the hug was a mistake as soon as she’d done it. She could smell the citrusy scent of his shower gel and feel the steady thud of his heart against her. And this surge of sheer attraction, tempting her to jam her mouth over his and let him lose himself in her, forget his pain for a while...
This was insane.
It had to stop.
Now.
She dropped her hands pulled away. ‘Sorry. I overstepped the boundaries. I just thought you could do with a hug.’
‘I did. Thank you,’ he said.
Though she noticed that his pupils were huge. And she had a nasty feeling that her own were in a similar state. She couldn’t even put it down to low lighting because she’d left the overhead light on. ‘I, um, I’d better get going.’
‘Thank you for today,’ he said. ‘For everything you’ve done. I appreciate it.’
‘No problem. I’ll see you Monday.’
Panic skittered across his face. ‘Sophie, I know it’s pushy of me to ask, but... I don’t have a clue what to do with Sienna tomorrow. There’s only so much story-telling and colouring we can do in a day.’
‘You could always do something messy,’ she suggested.
‘Messy?’
‘Glitter. Glue. Paint.’
He looked horrified.
She frowned. ‘Didn’t you do that sort of thing as a kid?’
‘No. My mother didn’t like mess.’
And you either followed in your parents’ footsteps or you rebelled. From what she’d read in Cindy’s file, clearly Jamie had chosen to walk the same path as his mother.
Her thoughts must have shown on her face, because he said, ‘There’s nothing wrong with liking a tidy house.’ She could even hear the slight defensiveness in his tone.
‘And there’s nothing wrong with a bit of mess, either,’ she said. ‘It doesn’t take that long to clear up.’ She’d call into the shops on the way here tomorrow, to get the art supplies she knew he didn’t have. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow at eleven.’
And she left without finishing her coffee, and before she did anything really crazy—like sliding her arms round his neck and kissing him stupid.
* * *
Jamie hadn’t felt this mixed up in a long time. Since Sophie had put her arms round him like that, it felt as if part of him had been locked away and the key was rusty but starting to turn in the lock.
How close he’d been to leaning forward and kissing her. Finding out if that perfect Cupid’s bow of a mouth tasted as sweet as it looked. If she’d kept her arms round him for one more second, he knew he would’ve wrapped his own arms round her in return and kissed her until they were both dizzy.
It was just as well she’d pulled away.
He didn’t want to feel, to lay himself open to risking the devastation of losing someone close again, the way he’d lost Fran. Plus his guilt told him he didn’t deserve that kind of closeness.
But part of him longed to see the daylight again. To see the world in full colour.
And when Sophie Firth had wrapped her arms around him, the world had felt bright again. Real. Warm. Living.
He was going to have to be really, really careful. Take cold showers. Mentally tattoo a note on his hand to keep his distance. For all their sakes.