Once I made up my mind to listen to my inner guidance and go on this pilgrimage, I had to massively rearrange my life. It was no small assignment, as I would have to take at least a month and a half off of work and be out of communication with my world for that entire time. That was a long time to disappear, especially in the face of a divorce and massive professional responsibilities and commitments.
I knew it wouldn’t be easy. But obstacles had never stopped me from pursuing anything else in my life. In fact, it almost seemed a prerequisite for me that things be difficult if I were to undertake them. The challenge was what made life interesting.
First I told my daughters. To my surprise, they were all for it and fully supported my plan.
“Go for it, Mom,” said my oldest daughter, Sonia. “You’ve been saying you needed a change for some time. This is obviously a great way to begin making changes in your life.”
A born empath, Sonia had suffered along with me for the past several years, which only made me feel all the more guilty and depressed.
My other daughter, Sabrina, was my optimistic cheerleader. “You can do this, Mom. I know it’s important, so if that is what your Higher Self told you to do, you have to trust your spirit and go for it.”
Relieved that they understood and supported my intention without question, I now had to tell Ryan, who managed all my business affairs and to whom I would be leaving a mountain of responsibility and work while I was gone. I wasn’t sure what he would think.
I called him a few days later to tell him I was going to walk the Camino.
“What’s a Camino?” he asked, almost laughing when I told him that I needed to take more than a month off. I wasn’t surprised by his reaction. He knew me well and had seen me do other crazy and unexpected things before, but never of this magnitude.
“It’s an over 800-kilometer spiritual pilgrimage starting in France at the foot of the Pyrenees, and ending in Santiago, Spain,” I answered.
“You mean the Pyrenees Mountains?” he asked, not sure he had heard me correctly.
“Yes, the mountains.”
“How are you going to do that, Sonia? You just had knee surgery a few months ago!”
He was right. I did have knee surgery, and I was not yet fully recovered.
“I don’t know, Ryan. But I am being guided to do it, so I have to.”
“Are you sure you are being guided correctly?” he asked. “I’m not aware that you are much of a hiker.”
“I know. It’s crazy, isn’t it?” I answered, laughing myself. “I’m not a hiker at all. But I guess I’ll become one.”
“How long does a Camino take? You have so many speaking commitments coming up this year. I’m not sure you have the time.”
“I don’t know. I’ve read it can take anywhere from a little over a month to two months, depending on how fast you walk,” I replied, now laughing even harder. “If I have to, I’ll run.”
“Across Spain? You are ridiculous.” I could picture him shaking his head on the other end of the phone.
“I know. It does sound ridiculous. But, seriously, Ryan. I have to go. I don’t know exactly why, but I trust my vibes.”
“Well, that I know. Okay. Let’s see what you have ahead for the year.”
We discussed my teaching schedule and discovered a window of exactly 38 days in May and June when I would be free to do the walk. Then I would have to show up in Vienna to teach a workshop.
“Put it on my calendar, Ryan,” I said to him.
“Okay,” he replied. “I’ve inked it in: WALKING ACROSS SPAIN.”
Hanging up the phone, I could feel my heart was pounding with excitement. I couldn’t believe I had just allowed myself to commit to this. I was going for it, and now there was nothing in my way.