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Once we arrived at Geoff 's house on Thursday evening, I could tell that it was going to be a long weekend. Geoff had had a bad day at work and other than a quick hello to the children had locked himself in our old bedroom for the last four hours.
By 9:00 pm I was finally getting annoyed when I texted:
Kelly –
Why aren't you spending time with your children?
Then I waited.
By 9:15 pm, there was still no response.
Kelly-
Geoff, the kids are crying for you and Mandy is going to bed in 30 minutes, please come downstairs and spend some time with your children.
That's when I heard the sound of Geoff moving around upstairs. After another ten minutes spent in the bathroom, Geoff finally made his way down the stairs and was greeted like a king.
"Daddy!!!" Mazie screamed.
"Daddy!" Mandy cried while holding up her arms to be held.
"Hi girls! Daddy needs a minute, I'll be right back," he said to the girls before looking at me and saying in his nasty yet soft voice, "I had my alarm set for 9:30 pm, you didn't have to text me."
Trying to keep my cool I said, "You shouldn't have been napping when it's your night to watch the kids."
"I had a headache, and it's not like you had anything better to do. Besides, I'm awake now," Geoff said with condescension.
Fucking, Fucking, ASS HAT! He was treating me like a FUCKING babysitter when technically I wasn't even supposed to be here. I was supposed to be invisible except at nursing times, so this was supposed to be my time to watch Netflix and catch up on some paperwork for work.
That was what I wanted to say, but trying to prevent myself from yelling, I roared, "Whatever Geoff." Yeah, I'm a mature adult. "I'm going to nurse Mandy and put her to bed."
"Can't you wait till after my break?" Of course, he couldn't pass up his smoke break.
"No Geoff, I need to put Mandy to bed now, or she'll have a meltdown."
Huffing like a teenager being told to pick up his socks, Geoff reluctantly kissed Mandy goodnight and promised Mazie M&Ms before bedtime.
Nope, I wasn't going to say a word. I just kept reminding myself that I was an invisible parent during Geoff 's weekends.
Luckily, Mandy was so tired that she was passed out within ten minutes allowing me to change into my pajamas before Dale's call.
As I was walking into the spare room, I could already hear Mazie screaming and running in circles downstairs while Geoff desperately tried to get her to calm down in vain.
That's what M&Ms do to a 5-year-old at bedtime, Dumb Ass! I childishly said in my head reminding myself that bedtime with a sugared-up Mazie was his problem, and not mine.
At least I had four weeks till our next scheduled weekend visit and two half-day visits in between. I'd have Mazie back to her routine by then, even if it were just so that Geoff could tear it apart again.
Wasn't divorce grand?
I was usually not this bitter about Geoff, but for some reason him pulling a four-hour nap the first day we were here threw me into "bitch" mode. Luckily, after years of dealing with his selfishness and narcissism, I'd learned that a smile is the best way to handle an argument with Geoff. But that doesn't mean I couldn't allow myself an internal monologue expressed in the style of a “raging bitch.”
Right at 10:00 pm my phone lit up with the welcoming alert of Dale's call.
"Hello, Mr. Wilson!"
"Good Evening, my Kelly! How is your visit going?"
"It's going about as well as I usually expect. Though I think we shouldn't talk about it while I'm still in the house. He brings out the worst in me, and I don't want that to bleed into our call tonight."
Understanding my need to change the subject, we fell into an easy conversation about our schedules over the weekend and his upcoming trip to the Crayola Experience with the twins.
Around 11:00 pm, we were interrupted when there was a knock on my door, and I asked Dale to hold for a moment before pressing mute. If there was one thing Dale didn’t need to hear, it was the horrible interactions I always had with my ex.
"Come in."
"Hey, Kelly. I just wanted to let you know that I finally got Mazie to bed. Not sure why she was so worked up, what did you feed her for dinner?"
Oh! HELL NO!
"She had yogurt and pancakes, but didn't you give her M&Ms before bed? "
"Only a few pieces. It shouldn't have made Mazie so hyper. Are you sure you're keeping her on a good bedtime schedule at home? It's important to keep children on a routine, you know," Geoff said to me as if I hadn't been parenting them on my own for most of their lives.
OR THE FACT THAT YOU GAVE A 5-YEAR-OLD M&Ms BEFORE BED!!!!
"I'll make sure I get her back on track once we are home. Was there anything else?"
Shrugging his shoulders without commitment, he finally said, "Thanks for letting me take a nap tonight, I had a long day at work, and my head wouldn't stop pounding."
He said this without condescension, so as usual, I found myself forgiving him a little.
"It worked out okay, no worries," I said, as sincerely as possible.
"So, Mazie seems to like her new school. She seems to have made some new friends."
"She has. She's especially close with a set of twins in her classroom named Katie and John."
I know I should probably elaborate, but I still had Dale on the line, and I'd rather spend my evening conversing with him instead of dealing with Geoff's unusual attempt at a conversation.
"She did mention them and a man by the name of Mr. Wilson? She says that you guys hang out a lot."
"Dale Wilson is John and Katie's dad and the principal at her school. The kids bonded, so we try to have regular play dates," I said, hoping to mask as much of his importance as I could. Geoff had extensive experience in tearing down every piece of joy in my life, so I was not ready to give him full access to Dale.
"Oh Kelly, I can tell right now that you have a crush on this Mr. Wilson. Tssk, Tssk. Just remember that you don't know how to read people. Don't confuse Mr. Wilson's polite conversation as anything more than friendship," he said before adding, "How many times have I told you that life would be a lot easier for you once you realize that you aren't the type of person men go for? And I'm not just talking about your weight. You simply never learned how to socialize the right way. I should know, I was your closest friend for eight years for a reason."
Thank God I had Dale on mute at that moment, because how much more embarrassing could this conversation get?
"Thanks for the advice, Geoff. I'll see you in the morning," I said, trying to hurry him from the room.
"Just don't embarrass yourself, it's important that Mazie make friends, and I'd hate for your weirdness to get in the way of it," he said, trying to sound like a concerned friend, but coming across as the prick he was.
"You know Kelly, even though we aren't together...," he said, trailing off. "Well, you're still the only one I want to stick it in." Then he gave me his fucking bedroom eyes. "I can't promise anything, but I could probably stick it in you now if you're interested. But it would have to be quick because I'm starting to feel tired again."
Believe it or not, this was how he seduced me almost every one of the 72 times that we had sex.
"Geoff, I think it's best if we stay friends...without benefits. You know, for the girls."
"All right, but it has been over two years for both of us, this may be your last chance for a while. I'll be awake for a few minutes if you change your mind."
"Will do. Goodnight, Geoff!"
"Goodnight Kelly!" he said, before adding, "I hope you packed something other than dresses and skirts this time. If we go somewhere with the kids, I don't want to look weird when you're with us."
Then he shut the door.
Thank GOD for the mute function on my phone!!!