Jacob slammed the door to his mom’s car and stomped through the supermarket parking lot.

“Jacob,” his mother called after him. “I can understand if you don’t want to talk about it, but please don’t take it out on my car.”

On the ride to the store, Jacob had deflected his mom’s incessant questions through a surprisingly effective combination of staring out the window and grunting. As far as he was concerned, there was nothing to talk about. His dad was out of his life, and one more tally on a long list of broken promises didn’t change anything.

After receiving a wrinkled postcard from his dad a few weeks back saying that he would be in town and wanted to take Jacob to lunch, Jacob spent the appointed morning staring out the window, waiting for his dad long past the time he had promised he would arrive. Jacob’s excitement had changed to impatience to annoyance to anger and finally to resignation. Four hours later he had given up and felt silly for even believing his dad would show up in the first place.

One postcard and one more no-show didn’t change anything. He would wake up again the next morning, and his dad would still be gone, he still wouldn’t be a part of his life, and there was nothing in the world that Jacob could do about it.

“Hey,” his mom said, catching up to him. She handed him a list. “Grab these things for me and you can pick out something for yourself.”

She put her arm around him and he actually didn’t mind the hug, though he looked around quickly to make sure there wasn’t anybody from school who saw it.

Jacob walked slowly around the giant supermarket, picking up the tomatoes, canned tuna, and sugar on his list, thinking about what he wanted for himself. Jerky? Corn Pops? Chocolate milk? Wasabi peas? But when he made it to the frozen foods aisle, he knew exactly what he was craving.

A prank.

It came to him in a flash. He would convince the supermarket manager that corndogs came from chickens with wooden legs.

He found the corndog section, opened the freezer door, felt the rush of cold on his face, and grabbed a box.

“Psst!” he heard from inside the freezer.

Jacob peered in between the clear plastic sheets that lined the back of the freezer. He saw something move.

“What are you doing here?” the voice said. It wasn’t the manager, but someone more peculiar.

An eye peeked through. Jacob forgot about his prank and slammed the freezer door. He wondered if he should tell his mom that a creepy supermarket employee was spying on his frozen food choices.

Down the aisle, the door to the freezer opened and Jacob saw someone emerge. For a fleeting moment he thought it might be his dad, that a message had gone awry and it had been a misunderstanding, but instead he saw that it was the man in silver, who had once given him a spaceship and set his space adventures in motion. Jacob ran over and they ducked into the freezer.

He looked around at stacks of pizza boxes and TV dinners and bags of meat in blue plastic crates. The man in silver was holding a half-eaten corndog.

“You eat them frozen?!” Jacob asked.

The man in silver cocked his head. “They’re precooked. What are you doing at the supermarket? Haven’t you heard the news? The king has called elections and he has nominated you for president of the universe!”

“President?” Jacob rubbed his arms, which were getting very cold. “Shouldn’t they get an adult to do that?”

The man in silver looked horrified. “An adult? Oh my, Jacob, that is a terrible idea. Adults just want to stand around and talk, and… Could you imagine the speeches? Ugh.” He shivered. “I hope you will not be making decisions like that once you are in office.”

Jacob couldn’t imagine being in charge of the universe. He didn’t even know where all the different planets were, and last time he couldn’t even fly around space without blowing up some stars, causing a giant space kapow, getting stuck on a planet of substitute teachers, and barely escaping with his life. Being able to fly around the universe without destroying it was probably a rather basic part of the president’s job description.

“What about the king?” Jacob asked. “What’s happening to him?”

“No one knows. But listen, there isn’t much time left. You have to make it to Planet Headline to declare your candidacy in…” The man in silver looked at a small piece of plastic. “Less than six zoomecs.”

“What’s a zoomec?”

“Forty-seven parcelticks.”

Jacob blinked in confusion. “Huh?

The man in silver waved impatiently. “You have about two Earth days. Are you going? You’d better hurry.”

Jacob imagined blasting off into space and giving speeches and shaking hands with Astrals and possibly having control over everything. He certainly had some ideas about reducing the number of vegetables children were forced to consume, and there were some laws regarding fatherhood that he wouldn’t mind enacting. He wasn’t really sure that he was cut out to be a politician, but if the king had confidence in him…

“I’m in. Where’s the spaceship?”

The man in silver took a bite out of his corndog and frowned. “How am I supposed to know?” he said with his mouth full. “You took mine last time and you didn’t even bring it back. I’ve been stuck on this planet ever since.”