Chapter Ten

Wandering into the drawing room, Natalie’s thoughts remained with Garrett Castleton. There was more to him than she had thought. Was he truly a rake? Was he a gentleman at heart? Upon leaving Raven’s Park, would he go back to his disreputable ways? And how was it that he appeared more handsome every time she laid eyes upon him?

Examining the handkerchief she’d been embroidering for the past twenty or so minutes, she cursed. Not paying attention had produced disastrous results. The delicate flowers were now a riotous splash of dandelions and weeds with no order whatsoever. Such work could almost be considered artistic if the back of the fabric didn’t consist of crazy knots and loops.

She jumped guiltily when her mother addressed her. “I cannot imagine what you have been thinking about that would cause you to lose your concentration.” Her mother gestured toward the handkerchief with a disdainful glance. “That fabric, I believe, is irreparable.”

The other ladies looked over at the embarrassing results in her lap and clucked their tongues. Aunt Eleanor winked.

The unwanted attention shifted to the entry when the gentlemen appeared, many still cradling their port. A few drifted out to the terrace and lit cigars, but Lord Ravensdale placed his hand upon the Duke of Monfort’s shoulder and steered him toward Natalie’s chair.

The duke, ever the stoic, glanced at her blankly as he and her father took their seats upon the adjacent settee. “Good Lord,” her father exclaimed, “what on earth are you embroidering there, daughter? Has some newfound style for handkerchiefs come into fashion?” He laughed as Natalie tucked the offensive piece of cloth into the chair behind her.

“I’d like to see any embroidery you produced, Father,” she retorted. Parents could be so annoying.

The haughty duke raised one eyebrow at her.

Her father then remembered why he’d come over. “The duke here has invited your mother and me, and you of course, to join him on his estate. I was just telling him how much I thought you would enjoy such an outing. Especially since you’ve been confined to Raven’s Park all summer.”

Her father seemed to expect some sort of response, so Natalie forced herself to smile graciously. “Oh…um…that would be…er, lovely.” Argh! Had her father already drawn up betrothal contracts?

At last, the duke deigned to speak. “I maintain a first-rate stable and dressage arena upon my estate. Your father says you are an excellent horsewoman. Of course, you shall be most welcome to make use of the facilities.” Although his words were welcoming, his eyes were not. Such a cold man!

“How kind of you, Your Grace,” she murmured. And then out of nowhere she felt a heightened awareness. The air within the room suddenly charged, much like the air outside before a summer storm.

Lord Hawthorne had entered. Casually propping himself against the back of a loveseat, he unashamedly observed her. He wasn’t smiling, but she sensed his amusement. He flicked his gaze toward a large floral arrangement, and his eyes twinkled further. She nearly laughed out loud. He had remembered her desire to deter the duke’s suit.

The duke and her father continued their own conversation, Natalie more than happy to stay out of it. A few women gathering around the pianoforte plucked out some tentative notes.

Her mother beckoned. “Come over here, dear, and play for us.”

Dutifully, Natalie excused herself and followed her mother’s wishes. She actually enjoyed this feminine pursuit. Needing no written music, she placed her fingers on the keys and played notes she heard in her head. She, in no way, fancied herself a great musician, but she did enjoy entertaining others. It was a vanity she could live with and feel no guilt whatsoever.

Settling herself upon on the wooden bench, she began in the upper register with a few convoluted scales and arpeggios from left to right. As her mood lifted, she interspersed personal melodies with songs she’d memorized years ago. She did not play loudly. She played so people could continue conversing around her. She often marveled at the construction of such an instrument. She also marveled at the constraints her various musical instructors had attempted to put upon her playing.

They’d used every means at their disposal to convince her to play written music that was boxed in to specific counts and keys. Such restrictions annoyed her. She believed that, once she understood the instrument and how it worked, she ought to be able to play whatever she wished. Two of her instructors had quit in frustration. After the fourth such instructor resigned, her parents deferred to her inclinations at last and allowed her to play as she wished.

Dismissing such memories, she slowed her music down and then sped it back up at will. Her music was a story, and she the storyteller.

After a few minutes, the hair on the back of her neck seemed to stand on end. Lord Hawthorne had moved to sit behind her. She faltered a few notes and then halted her play altogether. Her music reflected her mood and her feelings. She was not comfortable playing something while thinking about Garrett Castleton. And she could not help but think about him with him watching over her shoulder.

The notes would be too loud, too bold. She looked down at her hands at a loss. Nobody else paid much heed to her playing, so she did not feel compelled to continue. Sliding to the side of the bench, she stood and tamped down the impulse to stretch like a cat. Sometimes her muscles tied up in knots if she played for too long. Lord Hawthorne stood as well.

“Would you care to stroll outside?” he asked. “We shall stay close enough to the house so that you don’t need to worry about—being chaperoned and all that nonsense.” Eyes that were nearly black twinkled down at her. His playfulness was something new. She liked it.

Natalie agreed with a nod. Slipping her hand upon his arm, she allowed him to lead her outside through the terrace doors. Going in the opposite direction from her father’s cigar-smoking cronies, they stepped from the marbled patio onto the grass and walked toward a distant folly.

Garrett had attended several recitals, but he’d never heard a young lady play like Lady Natalie. At times her music sounded quiet, reflective, and relaxing, and then it would change, becoming angry, even chaotic. Then again, she would drift into something whimsical or exotic. It had taken several minutes before he realized she was not playing any arrangement ever written. The music came from within her. She created in the moment.

Like the lady herself, the music intrigued but also baffled.

“A chaperone is not only for my protection, you know, my lord.” Together they strolled away from the lights pouring through the drawing room windows and french doors. “My brothers, when paying attention to any particular young lady of gentle birth, are adamant about keeping chaperones within a safe distance.” She laughed a little before continuing. “When Darly—Darlington, my eldest brother—was one and twenty, he very nearly found himself betrothed to the vicar’s daughter. If not for my mother and Aunt Eleanor’s watchful eyes, he’d have a full nursery by now. The girl’s mother had purposely left them alone in the rectory. Luckily, Mother and Aunt felt a strong urge for spiritual guidance that morning.”

“What happened?” Garrett asked, intrigued despite himself. Stories like this normally bored him, but he enjoyed listening to her talk. Her perspective charmed him.

Natalie laughed again. “Well, they never went into any details where my innocent ears could hear, but…”

“Yes?” Garrett glanced sideways and grinned at her.

“According to Stone, the girl was pretty, and Darly not immune to her…allure. Fortunately for him, Mother noticed this.”

The two stopped walking when they reached the trunk of a large tree. Garrett removed his jacket, placed it on the ground, and indicated she sit. Organizing her skirts, Natalie settled upon the jacket, pulled up her knees, and hugged them with both arms. For all her bravado, she looked forlorn. Garrett took a seat behind her and leaned against the tree. With his long legs bent along each side of her, he pulled her back to lean against his chest. This intimacy was inappropriate, but she did not protest or even lose track of her conversation.

“Mother and Aunt Eleanor followed him to the rectory that day.” Natalie chuckled and let her head relax against him. “They slipped into the side door after seeing the girl’s mother running back to the vicarage. Already suspicious, they assumed rightly that the girl’s mama had gone to fetch someone to witness the compromising situation. When the girl’s mother returned with a few ladies and burst into the chapel, all four of them were earnestly praying in the front row.” She paused for effect. “According to Stone, the daughter’s hair was unbound and her dress wrinkled. What could be said, really, with both Mother and Aunt Eleanor sitting between them?”

Garrett laughed, picturing the young viscount sitting with his mother and godmother between him and the ambitious girl. Darlington was lucky to have such devoted womenfolk in his life.

Garrett tipped his head and inhaled the sweet scent in Natalie’s hair. When he did so, a few tendrils tickled his lips. He’d wrapped his arms around her waist and could feel each breath she took.

Jolted by an unwelcome memory, Garrett spoke without thinking. “There are women who will use whatever means available to capture a title.”

Natalie leaned to the side and looked over her shoulder so she could meet his eyes. “There are men who will use their superior strength to capture a dowry.”

This gave Garrett pause. He raised his eyebrows in question and felt his jaw tighten in anger. “Cortland?” he asked incredulously.

“Oh, no. Good Lord, never him.” She spoke with derisive laughter, relaxing into him once again. “Anyhow, the scoundrel did not succeed.” She sighed. “I was ridiculously naive. It was my first season, and I’d not become betrothed yet.” She moved her arms from her knees and placed them atop Garrett’s. “He convinced me to walk outside with him. Believe it or not, I took him at his word when he told me a kitten had caught itself in a rosebush.” Again, she laughed at herself.

“Of course, there was no kitten.” Garrett spread his fingers wide and threaded hers through them. He tucked them into his fists.

“Once we reached the roses, in which of course, there was no kitten, he attempted to kiss me despite the fact that I’d told him ‘no’ more than once.”

Garrett nuzzled his lips at the juncture where her neck sloped into her shoulder.

“I was saved though, as Joseph had followed us. He sent me back inside and settled matters to his satisfaction. I was terrified he would call the cad out.”

“He did not?” Garrett asked. “But punished the brute with his fists, I hope?”

Again, Natalie turned her head to look at him. “How did you know that?”

“Your brothers are protective of you.” He nuzzled the soft skin on the lobe of her ear with his lips. “They are not all bad, now, are they?”

She didn’t answer. Instead, a shiver ran through her body. He responded by pulling her closer. This was madness! When had he become such an utter fool? He ought to remove his hands from her person and lead them back inside, back into the safety of the drawing room surrounded by her mother and father and several of their close acquaintances.

“What?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.

Garrett chuckled softly this time. “Your brothers, protecting you.” Where were they now? They ought to be protecting her from him. His tongue traveled along the peach-like skin at the top part of her ear. He trailed it around the inner edge.

“Oh…” She sighed softly. “Not so bad.”

Lady Natalie Spencer was affected by his touch. With his arms around her waist, he felt her breathing quicken. His lips explored the outer shell of her ear in a lazy manner, nipping and licking the tender skin. Pleasure coursed through him when she moaned softly.

“Um…” she murmured. “Uh…Tell me about…the women,” she finally managed to get out.

This time it was he who paused. “The women?”

“The ones who have tried to marry you for your title,” she prompted.

“Similar girls to the one who attempted to trap your brother, only…” He stopped playing with her ear.

She tilted her head toward his mouth as though bereft without his lips. But she persisted in her question. “Only?”

“Only I had no womenfolk to ward off the mothers.” His voice came out harsher than he’d intended.

“But you are not wed,” she said curiously. “You have not married.”

“How do you think a gentleman gains a reputation such as mine, sweetheart?” He stilled. His arms loosened around her waist. As though sensing his withdrawal, Natalie grasped on to his hands and wrapped them about her firmly.

“It is ridiculous, is it not?” Annoyance, he thought, shook her voice. “That two people would be forced to marry regardless of their emotions. The notion of being compromised seems a terrific penalty for so innocent a crime—or no crime at all! And the punishment of a lifetime married to whomever one might be trapped by? I am appalled, and yet we are bound by society’s rules. Marriage ought not to be a penalty. It ought to be a gift shared between two people—two people who want to pledge themselves to one another for life.”

Garrett pondered her words. She had obviously given this subject a great deal of thought.

“I am glad you did not let yourself be trapped and bound to a woman you did not wish to wed,” she continued. “I do not care if that is why you have been labeled a rake.”

Moments passed, and then he let out a deep sigh. “But what of the girl? You do not have sympathy for her?” He was not convinced. He’d been a cad.

“Well…” She paused as though working out a mathematical equation. “You did not ruin her? In truth?”

He nuzzled her again, just below her chin, ever so softly. But he needed to answer her question—somehow it mattered, her opinion of him. “I did not. We kissed open mouthed. We were, um, embracing. When her aunt burst into the room with some cousins, the girl somehow managed to rip the bodice of her dress.” He held himself very still, his mouth still resting against her skin.

“She must have been very ambitious indeed.” The words escaped her with a hint of awe. “To expose oneself intentionally! I don’t blame you for not offering for her. She ought not to have acted with such coldhearted motivation.”

“I did compromise her. I did not ruin her—contrary to rumors spun in that direction.” His chin rested upon her shoulder. “I do not like to be toyed with or manipulated. I suppose I am more sensitive to both, having the Earl of Hawthorne for a father.”

“And yet you were discovered and ordered to marry the girl, am I right?” Natalie must have learned interrogation techniques from her father.

Garrett was almost amused at the accuracy of her line of questioning. And yet disgust sounded in his voice. He wouldn’t sugarcoat his actions. “I refused. I flat out refused.”

They sat silent for a few minutes, staring back at the manor, candlelight shining from within. “And now, would you ever marry a woman you…well…merely to salvage her reputation? Even if you did not find her to be compatible?”

“The women I keep company with pose no threat to my bachelor status. Under normal circumstances.” He nearly laughed at the irony of this very moment. “Would you ever marry a man to salvage your reputation?”

She shook her head side to side adamantly. “I have just been released from an unwanted engagement. I am in no hurry to place myself in another one.”

“You would allow yourself to be ruined in the eyes of society?”

“There are other ways to smooth these things over—ways that do not require two reluctant people to tie themselves together for a lifetime.”

Garrett’s hands rested just below the thrust of her breasts. He could not help but move one up until he felt the ridge where her stays ended and plump softness began. Drawing light circles, he felt her skin tighten beneath his fingers through the light cover of her dress. His mouth resumed trailing kisses along her chin. He continued thusly, and Natalie turned her head so he could access her neck more easily. Good God, he must be foxed.

Trifling with this lady was beyond reckless. They sat in plain sight of the house. Admittedly, they enjoyed the cover of darkness, but their absence would be noticed soon. Allowing himself one more taste of her skin, he dropped his hands and leaned back against the tree. She turned her head and gazed at him in a leisurely fashion. She, apparently, was quite comfortable and unperturbed at the possibility of their imminent discovery.

“And now you have realized you are once again tempting fate,” she goaded him, still not moving. He was beginning to understand that at times, she donned a sophistication she did not own. He’d better watch himself. She could not be relied upon to bring any restraint to their…What was this between the two of them? He must not continue this dalliance.

“You ought not to make yourself so…available to me,” he said. “I might allow myself to be seduced by your innocence one of these days, and that would put us both in a scrape.”

Her eyes flashed in the moonlight as his words sank in. “Ah, well, apparently neither of us knows what it is that we want.” She scrambled away and stood abruptly. After brushing the grass from her skirts, she glared at him. “And don’t be thinking I’m available to you, my lord.” Her attempt at sounding scornful was ruined when her voice caught. Nonetheless, with a very feminine flourish, she twirled about and marched away. She held her head high as she fled. Garrett watched as she avoided the terrace and disappeared around the side of the house. She would not return to the other guests. She would be in no mood to play charades.

Ah, so, he had hurt her.

Garrett hardened himself against a niggling remorse. Lady Natalie Spencer was an unwanted complication. He lay back upon the grass and stared up at the sky. It would be best to avoid spending any more time alone with her. He wished he could offer her more. He wished he could be the type of man she needed, a romantic white knight in shining armor. Being caught between honor and dishonor was one of the most uncomfortable situations he’d ever experienced.