Henley sat at her kitchen table in her pyjamas, facing the French doors, watching the rain fall. Exhaustion was sweeping through her body in waves. It had taken almost an hour to convince their dad to pack a bag and relocate to Simon’s. Stanford had already let himself in and had fallen asleep on the sofa when she had finally arrived home at midnight. It was quiet without Emma singing along to her programmes on the TV, Luna barking and Rob moaning about the state of the financial markets as he worked on his laptop. The cup of tea Stanford had made for her had long gone cold. The Indian summer had taken a swift departure and the sky outside was as grey and heavy as her mood. She’d managed just three hours’ sleep.
Henley stiffened when she heard the key in the front door.
‘That is definitely my cue to go,’ said Stanford, picking up a banana from the fruit bowl.
‘Thanks for staying over.’
‘It was nothing. It’s not as if I was on a promise last night, but Anj, take my advice.’
‘I know what you’re going to say.’ Henley got up and poured the cold tea down the sink.
‘I’m sure that you do. I know what you’re like. You want to take it all on, on your own, but you can’t, so go easy on him. All of this, it ain’t easy.’
The door opened and closed. Henley had about a minute’s grace as Rob took off his trainers and wet hoodie. All his text message had said was: We need to talk. Four words that had never, in the history of pre-empting a conversation, led to a happy ending or agreeable conclusion.
‘I bought you a latte.’ Rob placed the drink on the breakfast bar. ‘Paul? I didn’t realise that you were here.’
‘Morning, mate.’ Stanford shook hands with Rob. ‘Didn’t want Anjelica here on her own. Right, I’m off. Tell Emma that Uncle Paul said hello.’
‘I will.’ Rob passed her the white cup, which had Anjelica, spelt, again, incorrectly in black ink on the side.
‘Thanks,’ Henley said. The hot brown liquid escaped from the ill-fitting cap and ran down her hands. She didn’t want it, but she took a sip anyway. ‘How’s Ems? I was going to FaceTime, but I got caught up with Dad last night.’
‘Yeah, she’s fine. A couple of the kids are off with a stomach bug so don’t be surprised when Ems comes down with it. Mum loves having her. Spoiling her to pieces, but she isn’t pleased.’
Henley rolled her eyes. ‘Of course she ain’t.’
‘You can’t blame her. It was bad enough having the police checking up on us every five minutes but now that they’re parked permanently outside the front door.’
‘She does know that it’s for her granddaughter’s safety? If she wants to risk that—’
‘You know that she doesn’t. Are you not going into work today?’
‘No, I’m going in later. Just got a few things to do this morning.’
‘I’ve been doing a lot of thinking,’ he paused, and then, ‘This situation isn’t working for me.’
‘What do you mean “this situation”?’ Henley held on tightly to the coffee cup. ‘What situation do you think that we’re in?’ Henley stared at Rob with the same blank ‘I think you’re talking shit’ look she usually reserved for the suspects she was interviewing.
‘I never wanted you to go back after what happened. I still think it was a mistake, but I suppose it wasn’t so bad when you were working cases in the office, but now that you’re back out there everything has changed. You’re putting us in danger.’
‘Rob—’
‘You’ve put Emma in danger.’
Checkmate. Henley got up and poured her latte down the sink. She watched the brown liquid begin its clockwise descent down the drain.
‘I have never put Emma or you in danger. If I’d had the slightest idea that someone would… Do you really think I want to live like this?’
‘Of course you don’t, but what have you actually done to change it? You could have walked away. You could still walk away, and now that Olivier has escaped, you should walk away. I may not be a bloody detective but even I know that he could turn up here. He nearly killed you. You conveniently forget about that.’
‘Oh, stop exaggerating. It was a couple of stab wounds. I wasn’t at death’s door.’ Even as she said it, her pulse quickened. They both knew it had been more than that.
‘Less than a week ago some psychopath left a head on our doorstep. What if it hadn’t been just a head? What if someone had come into the house and hurt Emma?’
‘I would never have let that happen, Rob. You’re acting like all of this is my fault. Why do you want to punish me for doing my job? Don’t you think that I feel guilty? Don’t you think that I have the same concerns that you do?’ Henley’s throat tightened. She sat back down on the chair. ‘I would die if anything happened to Emma,’ she said. ‘She’s my life. Do you think that I’m happy about you taking her halfway across London to live with your parents?’
Rob’s face hardened. ‘Your job comes first, always has, and you put what Stephen Pellacia wants before the needs of me and our child. You’ve done it before and you’re doing it again.’ Rob was shouting now. He stood up and placed his hands on his head. Henley could see the little vein in his neck pulsating with anger. Her right hand began to shake.
‘This has nothing to do with Stephen,’ she finally said. It had occurred to her that Rob suspected that she had slept with Pellacia after her mum had died, but that he couldn’t prove it.
‘Doesn’t it? It was his decision to put you back out there and to keep you out there even after last week.’
‘You make it sound like he’s controlling me on strings.’
‘Well, if he can’t get you in the bedroom he might as well pull your strings some other way.’
Henley didn’t stop to think. She picked up the closest thing, his beloved Arsenal mug, and threw it at him. He ducked as the mug flew by and shattered against the wall.
‘How fucking dare you? You stand there and act all sanctimonious, going on about how I’m putting my daughter in danger when this is really all about you and your precious ego. Would it make you feel better if I told you that instead of looking for not just one but two killers, I was spending my nights screwing Stephen on his office floor? Is that what you really want to hear, Rob?’
‘Are you?’
‘For God’s sake, no, I’m not. What is it? Don’t you trust me?’
Rob didn’t say anything. The silence was broken by the sound of the post being shoved through the letterbox. Heavy rain fell like stones on the skylight overhead.
‘Stop beating around the bush and tell me what you want,’ Henley said.
‘I’ve already told you. It’s us or the job. It’s as simple as that.’
‘You and your bloody ultimatums.’
Rob shrugged. ‘Call it what you like. I’m going upstairs to pick up some more clothes for Emma and me.’
‘You can’t keep her from me. I’m her mum.’ Henley bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from crying. She swallowed the blood that had pooled in her mouth.
Rob shrugged. ‘If you want to see her, you know what you need to do.’
Henley got up and opened the back door. She needed to breathe. The wind blew cold rain into her face, but there was nothing that could help ease the palpitations in her chest.
‘There’s something else,’ said Rob.
‘What is it?’ Henley kept her focus on the white star-like flowers on the jasmine bushes at the bottom of the garden. She didn’t want to look at Rob.
‘Our marriage. It’s changed. You’ve changed. You don’t treat me like your husband. I can’t even remember the last time we had sex. I feel like we’re broken.’
There was that word again. Broken. Henley felt as though a leaden weight had been dropped into her stomach. Female intuition or a detective’s instinct, she knew that a third person was now involved in her marriage.
‘The other night, when I left. I bumped into one of the mums from Emma’s nursery.’
‘Which one?’
‘You wouldn’t know her.’
‘Where?’
‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘Did you sleep with her?’ Henley turned around and tried to read the expression on Rob’s face. ‘Well? Did you?’
‘I went back to her flat and we had a couple of drinks. I was angry at you.’
‘Did you sleep with her?’
‘I came home.’
‘That doesn’t answer the question. Did you sleep with her?’
‘No. I didn’t.’
‘But you wanted to? Otherwise what would be the point in telling me?’
‘Not really. I can’t explain it, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. In case you’ve forgotten’ – Rob held up his left hand, tapping his ring finger with his thumb – ‘I like her, but I didn’t want her. But then you and I are… I don’t know what we are anymore.’
‘Don’t say broken.’ Henley walked out of the kitchen. She couldn’t be in the same room as him.
‘Where are you going?’ said Rob as he followed Henley out in the hallway and took hold of her arm.
‘Don’t touch me.’ Henley pulled her arm away. ‘You can make all the threats you want. You can fuck every single mum in that bloody nursery if that’s what floats your boat, but this is the last time that you ever ask me to choose.’