SUMMER BLINKED, HOPING it would somehow bring things back into focus for her. For a minute she’d thought Rafael had been about to kiss her and she’d wanted him to. She’d had to put her fingers to her lips to make sure she wasn’t still puckered up, waiting for it.
She knew she had been fantasising about him a lot recently but it couldn’t have been all in her imagination because she certainly wouldn’t have moved in for a kiss unless he’d leaned in first. He’d obviously had second thoughts in the nick of time, deeming his devotion to his daughter’s welfare a higher priority than a spur-of-the-moment kiss. The lapse in judgement had most likely come from tiredness and gratitude and nothing personal that would warrant her jeopardising her position at the clinic anyway. An admirable move that she would appreciate more once she scuttled back out of his home to hide her embarrassment under cover of darkness.
She’d clearly done her job well enough tonight to convince him she could take care of his daughter. If they had kissed, their working relationship would’ve become untenable and she doubted the clinic management would’ve looked favourably upon her if they thought she made a habit of coming on to the dads at day-care.
‘Sure. That would be great,’ she said, much too brightly for someone whose ego was gradually shrivelling up the further Rafael backed away from her. ‘I’ll speak to the bosses tomorrow and we can work out a schedule as best we can.’ One that entailed their only interaction from now on would be solely based around the handover of Gracie’s care.
‘Will you be okay walking home?’ His polite, if unsubtle, query was his way of telling her he wanted her to get the hell out of his house.
‘I’ll be fine. I’ll enjoy the walk.’ She practically stumbled down the stairs in her haste to get away from him and the situation she’d found herself in.
He didn’t even try to follow her and simply called out, ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
Summer let herself out onto the porch and the cold air seemed to sizzle against her red-hot skin. At least the non-kiss meant she could face him at work with a fraction of her dignity still intact. If they’d actually locked lips then thought about the consequences and pretended the moment hadn’t happened, the rejection would’ve stung even more than it did now.
She pulled her coat around her to keep the chill from penetrating the rest of her body and stepped down onto the sand. It was dark but the sky was clear, the moon providing enough light for her to see where she was going. This was her peaceful place. The waves breaking on the shore always managed to calm the tangle of the thoughts in her head when she’d had a rough day and this one had been a doozy.
The Boston lights on the horizon reminded her of the life and the people she’d left behind. Whilst she regretted the circumstances that had brought her out here, it was the best move she’d ever made and she didn’t intend to make the same mistake twice. There was no way she was giving up a job she loved and moving because she’d got involved with the wrong man again. She was the one who’d end up alone and in pain.
‘Are you sure you can’t have the chef rustle up some eggs Benedict for me? I’m sure he’s heard of it. That is if he didn’t get his qualifications off the back of a cereal box.’ Philomena Kerridge-Bates could be heard all over the rehab unit as Rafael walked through the main recovery ward on his way to the children’s ward and witnessed her pushing away her breakfast.
‘You don’t want all that fancy nonsense. What you need is a bowl of good old oatmeal, thick enough to stand on. That’ll soon build you up,’ Old Salty yelled across at her, dispensing his prescription for her recovery.
‘It sounds revolting. I thought this was supposed to be a first-class establishment? Why am I being subjected to this treatment?’ She fanned her face with the bone-handled fan she’d apparently brought with her to deal with the shock of such eventualities. The harassed girl who’d brought the offending food offering scuttled off, no doubt to have a breakdown in the kitchen along with the other staff attempting to cater to her needs. She was a paying client so there wasn’t much could be done about her attitude to the staff or the facilities except to try and pacify her. However, Old Salty was under no obligation to be polite and apparently regularly put her in her place.
‘You have a bed, three hot meals a day and people at your beck and call. What more do you need, woman?’ Her portly foe spoke with his mouth full of toast before slurping it down with his orange juice. The wink he gave Rafael made him think he was doing this on purpose to get under her skin but as long as they had each other to duel with, Rafael was keeping out of it.
‘Some manners would be good, Mr Harrington,’ Mrs Kerridge-Bates sniffed as she laid a linen napkin across her lap. Rafael had an inkling Salty would be making a point of ensuring she wasn’t going to get everything her own way while he was around.
Rafael carried on to the children’s beds to check up on his youngest patients, Peyton and Connor Walsh, who’d suffered severe spinal trauma after an accident with some scaffolding. He’d operated on them in Boston, removing shards of wood from Peyton’s thoracic spine and performing the new mini-scaffolding procedure on Connor. The three-dimensional bandage should heal his cracked vertebrae and Alex Kirkland, who specialised in the leg and walking lab, was working towards helping the children walk again.
That pioneering operation had attracted the clinic’s attention and he had these two to thank for bringing him and Graciela to Maple Island so he had a special attachment to the case.
‘Morning.’ He hadn’t expected to find Summer in here with them.
‘Morning.’ Summer was clearly not as excited about seeing him as the Walsh children were, who greeted him with a simultaneous, ‘Hi!’
Thank goodness they’d seen sense last night and avoided that kiss or things could’ve become awkward. It was more important his daughter have stability and understanding with someone she trusted than giving in to a spur-of-the-moment temptation. It had felt like the most natural thing in the world to lean in for a kiss after tucking Gracie into bed for the night. The chemistry had certainly been there between them and she’d suddenly become part of their little bubble, isolated from the rest of the world outside. In his home, far from real life at the clinic, he hadn’t been thinking about responsibility or the repercussions of what they had been doing. Only that he’d wanted to kiss her.
The irony had been when she’d made it clear the feeling was mutual, giving him pause for thought. He knew giving in to temptation would affect them both and so he had pulled them back from the brink of a mistake just in time. Since she’d agreed to his proposal about reconsidering Gracie’s care on a more regular basis, they’d have to get over their personal issues pretty quickly. There was no room for embarrassment or attraction lest it impact on his daughter in any way.
‘What have we got here?’ The children were both sitting up in their adjacent beds with Summer between them, surrounded by art supplies and smiles. She split her time between the day-care centre and her patients here when she could to check on the twins’ welfare, so it wasn’t unusual to find her in residence. It was simply the timing which had thrown him.
‘I thought we could try some art therapy today to see how Peyton and Connor are feeling about their time here and their progress.’ Summer was perfectly civil as she addressed his curiosity but she couldn’t quite meet his eye. Something he was going to have to work on if she was ever to trust he wouldn’t make another advance towards her.
He peeked at the two canvases the twins were painting to get an idea of how they were feeling about their long road to recovery.
‘May I?’ He checked with them before taking a closer look in case these were private expressions not intended for anyone else to see, merely an outlet for frustrations they hadn’t been able to communicate thus far.
There was no such hesitation in showing off their masterpieces so all credit went to their teacher for encouraging their efforts.
‘Mine first.’ Connor, the more confident of the two, held his up and waved it as if it was a winning lottery ticket.
Careful not to get any wet paint on his hands or his clean shirt before he did the rest of his rounds, Rafael took the canvas. The word ‘WINNER!’ was crudely written in thick black letters surrounded by an explosion of colourful splodges he thought might be ticker tape.
‘I beat Peyton yesterday in rehab,’ he explained with glee as his competitor stuck out her tongue.
‘That’s great. You’re both doing so well.’ Whilst some healthy competition focused in the right direction could aid a faster recovery, he didn’t want Peyton to become self-conscious that she wasn’t progressing as well as her brother.
‘Yes, but my injuries were worse than yours. Weren’t they, Doctor?’ Peyton showed she was equally as feisty and there was no way she was going to be left behind.
‘I’m a miracle of science.’
They competed to be crowned champion of the spinal unit but they were both winners in his eyes and he would never pick one over the other.
‘Let’s see what you’ve got, Peyton.’ He deflected the beginning of an argument to see what she’d painted, praying they wouldn’t force him to pick which one he preferred.
Although the colours—soft pinks and baby blues—weren’t as in your face as Connor’s, the word in the centre of the painting didn’t have any less impact.
‘Brave’.
They couldn’t have described themselves any more accurately with a four-thousand-word essay. Especially when there were so many negative emotions they could’ve exhibited given their circumstances. It said a lot about their strength of character and the amazing staff surrounding them. Summer included.
‘I didn’t realise we had such talented artists in our midst, did you, Miss Ryan?’ To maintain some sort of professional distance he’d decided to address her more formally and remind himself that due to her role in his life they should no longer be on familiar terms.
He was impressed today, not only with the twins’ resilience but by the methods she’d used to gauge their states of mind. It was easy to forget how important her role was here as a child life specialist as well as in the nursery when she downplayed it so well, but the psychological welfare of the patients was every bit as important as their physical recovery.
As the children’s wing expanded they’d have more need for her in this capacity when she provided such a positive experience for the children in between their medical procedures. He knew that would take her away from Gracie but she’d be starting school eventually and hopefully Summer would continue to job-share until then.
‘They’ve done really well. I’ll have to find somewhere special to hang them.’ She began to pack away the art supplies, no doubt due in her other role at the nursery now since he’d already dropped Gracie off there.
‘I think you both deserve a treat,’ Rafael bent down to whisper. ‘What about something from the bakery?’
‘Yay! You mean Brady’s, right, and not that vegan one my mom likes?’ Connor shuddered and Rafael put his mind at rest with a nod. ‘In that case, I’ll have a crème doughnut.’
‘Can I have a chocolate sprinkle doughnut, please?’ Peyton added her request too and her obvious excitement at such a small gesture made him wish these kids could get back to their normal lives as soon as possible.
‘Shh. Keep the noise down or everyone will want one.’ He’d check with their parents but he was sure they wouldn’t object to them having a small treat.
‘What about Summer?’
‘Yeah. Doesn’t she deserve a doughnut too?’
They petitioned on her behalf for a share in their success and he couldn’t deny such a request.
‘Sure. Perhaps Miss Ryan would come and tell me which sweet treat she’d prefer and we’ll let Dr Alex get on with your rehab.’ As fair-haired Alex approached the children’s bedside it became clear Rafael and Summer were no longer required and neither would want to step on his toes when Alex was the one now leading their case.
‘Yes, I’ll have to get in quickly before there are none of my favourites left.’ She was humouring him and the children but she did gather her supplies and follow him out into the corridor, leaving Alex to carry out his assessment.
‘They both seem to be in good spirits, all things considered.’ He debated whether or not to walk away and avoid a one-to-one with her but not only would that be immature, it wouldn’t do much to improve their working relationship when they were about to become closer than ever thanks to Gracie.
Summer tucked the large sketch book under her arm. ‘Yes. Obviously, our positive reinforcement is having an impact. At this stage I don’t think they need extra counselling regarding their stay at the clinic.’
The twins would have needed therapy to overcome the trauma of the accident itself but often the long-term confinement to the hospital bed could be just as distressing.
‘I think being here together has helped them settle in. I can see how Connor’s competitiveness is spurring on Peyton’s recovery.’ That sibling rivalry would give them the determination to overcome their injuries, if only to get one up on each other.
‘Yes, he’s helpful in his unique way.’ She smiled directly at him and Rafael took it as a sign she’d forgiven him and wanted to move past last night as much as he did.
‘They’ve come a long way since I first treated them back in Boston, and as much as I love seeing them I’m looking forward to the day when they can walk out of here.’
‘Me too. Well, I suppose I should get back to my other job before your daughter comes looking for me. How is she this morning?’
‘Still a bit sore and having trouble putting weight on the ankle, which is making her more challenging than usual.’ Gracie had been particularly fractious this morning, to the point of refusing to walk at all, so he’d had to carry her into nursery. He had hoped Summer would’ve been there to calm her down until he finished work and had more time to pander to her. They’d both been disappointed to find her not there.
Since this meeting had proved his urge to see her wasn’t apparently to apologise for last night or have her hurry back to the nursery, he had to conclude he’d simply wanted an excuse to see her. Not everything had been solved by resisting that kiss. Preventing it happening didn’t automatically stop him from thinking about what might have been.
‘In that case, I should get over there and see if I can take her mind off it.’
‘She won’t put that doll down so I think you’ve got two patients to contend with.’ The only way he’d got her to leave the house had been to promise Summer would help make Dolly feel better, and he wasn’t fond of making promises he couldn’t keep. Even if they were made on someone else’s behalf.
‘I think I can handle it,’ she said with a laugh to ease his conscience.
‘Good. Are we still on for your future career as a Gracie shadow too?’ He tried to convince himself that was the real reason he’d sought her out, that he hadn’t stuffed things up and could still count on her to do the right thing by Gracie.
‘Of course. I’ll have a chat with my manager when I get a chance.’
‘I’ll hang on here and have a word with Alex too. See if we can make it official.’ As a father himself, it might be beneficial to get his boss’s thoughts off the record about if he thought this was a good idea. He’d leave out the bit about almost kissing another member of staff, although since Alex had got together with Maggie Green, a physiotherapist here, he couldn’t very well complain about workplace romance.
‘No problem. Let me know if he’s on board before we say anything to Gracie.’ They stared at each other a heartbeat too long before she added, ‘All right, then. ’Bye,’ and walked away.
Rafael was still there to see her face light up when she stopped for a chat with Kaylee. She was a different person with her friend, laughing and carefree and a world away from a deadly serious single dad with more personal issues than she’d probably covered in her psychology training.
It was then he realised he had nothing to offer her even if he did like her on a personal level. He wouldn’t want to curtail her fun but a relationship with a single parent carried a lot of baggage that was bound to weigh her down. It wouldn’t be fair to clip her wings with the responsibilities of a family when she had so much more living to do before she settled down. He couldn’t whisk her away on spontaneous romantic breaks or take her clubbing into the early hours of the morning the way a single man could. Before he did anything, he had to consider Gracie and that meant Summer would always have to come second. She deserved to be someone’s number one and be spoiled with time and affection. The most he could give her was himself but even that came with stipulations. By entering into a relationship with him, Summer would be forced into a mothering role for Gracie that neither of them were probably ready for yet. It was best for Summer if they leave their one indiscretion in the past. She would get over it quicker than he would.
His chest hurt so badly at the thought of her moving on with another man he was sure that sadistic Cupid had taken a pot shot at him in a cruel prank.