It’s been a month and a half since
I was kicked out of Yearbook.
I still have a key but
it doesn’t feel like my space
anymore.
Knock on the door,
ask the advisor
if I can talk to her
in the hall.
She says they’re trying to make their last deadline,
which is tomorrow.
Deep breath,
tick,
exhale,
tock.
Mr. Lamb says
there are exoplanets that orbit
stars in systems they are not a part of.
Force their way in.
I say I’m sorry
I couldn’t be
the leader I wanted to be,
the leader she hoped I would be.
Say I’d like to help now,
if I can.
She tells me it isn’t her
I need to apologize to—
lets me past her
into the room.
I apologize to the staff,
tell them I cut up
their field day collage,
almost ruined the yearbook.
I thank them for doing my work for me.
Ask if I can help today,
their last day.
They all look at each other,
look at me.
Ask why I stopped caring,
say they respected me.
I tell them I’ve been having problems at home,
maybe they’ve heard.
Tell them I would really like to contribute.
They pull out a layout sheet,
let me in.
The last of the Senior pages—
I draw boxes,
label photos.
Easy
but it feels good,
I do it quickly,
the ruler
cool and smooth,
something solid
beneath my thumb.