Ellie retreated to the shop at midday, still hung over and praying that no customer had been looking for her. Minouche was miaowing to be let in and looking for her saucer of milk as Ellie opened the door and pulled up the shutters. She poured herself a huge glass of water and decided that absolutely nothing would be made today. She could tidy and tweak and write up her books and rough sketch, but not a finger would she put to making a hat or it would be a disaster.
Kim had phoned to say thanks for everything and check that she was OK.
‘I’m fine,’ she lied, ‘just a bit hungover.’
She had found Neil’s mobile phone under her duvet before she’d left the flat and wondered if he’d missed it. She was tempted to send him a message on it. Thank him. Embarrassing as it all was, she somehow hoped that he’d call on her to collect it. She wanted to talk to him, explain about last night and thank him for taking care of her when she was in such a state.
Rory had phoned and she had been deliberately cool and distant with him. She said nothing about seeing him in Lillie’s and in return he said nothing to her, only telling her his meeting had been a great success.
‘Good for you!’ she said, bitterly disappointed by his deception.
She was catnapping behind the counter in the late afternoon, pretending to read a copy of Marie Claire, when Fergus came to the door. Judging the state of her pale face, greasy pony-tailed hair and sunken eyes, he disappeared down the street to fetch a bacon sandwich and two bottles of Lucozade.
‘Get that into you,’ he said, watching her eat.
‘Ugh,’ she protested.
‘Any better?’
She nodded. The cure was working.
‘You OK, Ellie?’
She didn’t know what to say.
‘Rory’s a bastard, El! I know you like him but he’s a rat and you’re a princess. It’s not going to work. I don’t mean to sound like your big brother but he’s not good enough for you. He really isn’t. I should have kicked his head in last night.’
Ellie began to laugh. ‘Fergus, you’ve never kicked a soul in your life.’
‘I know, but if I ever start he’ll be top of my list for being such a scumbag to you.’
‘I still really like him,’ she admitted softly. ‘I just kept hoping that he’d be different, that I could change him!’
‘Why do lovers always want to change people?’ puzzled Fergus. ‘It always messes things up.’
‘Someone to be true and faithful, is that too much to ask?’
‘No,’ said Fergus, putting his arms round her and holding her for a while.
‘What about you?’ she quizzed eventually. ‘Did you enjoy last night?’
‘Yeah, it was great. Good buzz at Lillie’s. I met that guy Liam that works with Kim. He’s nice.’
‘Hey,’ she smiled. ‘Are you going to see him?’
‘Maybe. We might go for a drink tomorrow.’ Fergus fussed around, making sure she was OK, and brewed her a quick cup of reviving tea before heading back to his office for a meeting.
Puzzled that there had been no word from Neil, Ellie wondered what should she do about his phone. Obviously he was so busy in court that he hadn’t missed it.
Should she bring it back home with her and see if he collected it later at the flat? But then maybe it would look like she deliberately wanted him to call to see her. Should she simply get it delivered to his office? The couriers were always up and down the street. Checking the address in the phone book, she quickly shoved the mobile phone into an envelope with a scribbled thank-you note and paid for it to be delivered.
She was just locking up at the end of the day and talking to Scottie O’Loughlin when Rory appeared. He was wearing his black T-shirt and jeans and carrying twelve yellow roses. Scottie made a discreet disappearance to where he could watch them from his toy-shop window.
‘These are for you,’ said Rory, kissing her cheek.
‘What for?’
‘To say sorry about last night, for not going out with your friends.’
‘It’s all right, Rory,’ she said softly. ‘I had a good time and Kim enjoyed her birthday. We went to Lillie’s after, with a crowd from Davy’s.’
‘Lillie’s?’
‘Lillie’s Bordello, the nightclub.’
At least he had the good grace to look embarrassed.
‘So you saw me,’ he said evenly, looking her straight in the eye.
She nodded, not trusting herself to speak, not wanting to cry.
‘Yes, Kim and Fergus and Mary-Claire, we all saw you. Couldn’t help but see you.’
He didn’t even try to deny it or explain. ‘I’m sorry, Ellie. Just give me another chance.’
‘There’s no point,’ she admitted. ‘It’s not going to change things, is it?’
‘You’re a sweet girl,’ Rory said slowly. ‘I’m mad about you. You know that. Last night, I don’t know why but I just screwed it up.’
Ellie could see that in some bizarre way he meant it. All of it! It was just that with Rory what was meant to be easy and relaxed had become complicated and messy. And she didn’t want to do it any more. It was better to end it now before there were any more lies and hurt.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said as she took the yellow roses and his farewell kiss with absolutely no regrets.