Shay summoned his courage as he opened the door and peered into the sitting room. Lisa walked into view. She had a yellow glove on one hand, a second was draped over her other arm. Her hair was wet and sweaty.
She must have been cleaning all morning, he thought.
‘Well?’ she asked.
He took a breath. Best not exaggerate things, he told himself. But the desperate look on her face unbalanced him.
‘We could be on the way out of here,’ he said.
‘What?’ she said, the tension in her face easing. ‘You mean it?’
He smiled tentatively and headed for the kitchen.
What the fuck did I say that for?
Turning on the radio, he awaited the questions.
‘How will we be out of here?’ Lisa asked, a slight doubt in her voice.
I need to recover this.
‘I do my job on this one and they’ll recommend that I get back in, with a clean slate, and us out of here.’
He opened the fridge, took out the water container and poured himself a glass.
‘What do you have to do?’
‘You know I can’t say too much, Lisa. There’s a national crisis here. Those guards were just in their twenties. And that little girl.’
Lisa dropped her eyes.
‘I know,’ she said, looking at a photograph of their children on a kitchen shelf. ‘The parents of that poor girl.’
‘Lisa. This is my chance, our chance.’
She placed the loose glove on the table and reached out a hand, holding Shay’s arm softly. He relaxed.
At least we’re talking, not shouting.
‘The kids heard on the radio about a girl being shot dead,’ Lisa said. ‘Charlie’s still too young, but Molly was all upset, asking why someone would shoot a child. How do you explain to a child why a child has been shot?’
Shay nodded, sensing the anger rising in Lisa.
‘The people behind it are scum,’ she said. ‘But we know that. We live here.’
Shay rubbed his arm. It was still sore from the fall.
‘You trust them?’ Lisa asked.
Shay didn’t respond straight away. The ghostly rattle of the Luas echoed through the open windows.
‘Well, that’s what they said.’
Lisa’s eyes widened at the distinct lack of certainty in his voice. She knew him too well. But what could he say? He didn’t trust them.
‘Will what you have to do put us in danger … the kids?’
Shay refused to think about this too much. It wasn’t clear yet what he would have to do.
‘Just the usual eyes and ears.’
He felt her probing him as he poured out more water.
‘How long more do we have to stay here?’
Shay said nothing, and swallowed another gulp.
‘Not long,’ he said, putting the glass down.
He moved to hold her, but she avoided his touch. That coldness had returned and she stepped into the sitting room. She stood there with her back to him and stared out the window, the yellow glove still on her right hand.
‘They still holding what you . . . did . . . over you?’
Shay flinched. Lisa had never directly referred to it since they moved here. He couldn’t gather his thoughts quickly enough to respond. There was a pull and a smack. Lisa flung the other glove onto the sofa.
‘I’ll collect the kids,’ she said, moving for the door.
Shay was nailed to the floor. His brain was firing wildly and memories came crashing through.
‘Look at the ass on that. What do ye think her husband likes to do with that now? Ha?’
‘Jesus, Jamie, I tell ye what I’d like to do. But it’s not for, what do ye call it, public consumption, like.’
Shay glared back along the queue at Jamie and Tommy McCabe.
‘Why don’t you fuck off,’ he shouted back at them.
‘The boyfriend’s got spunk,’ Tommy said.
‘He does alright, and I bet ye I know where he likes to put it,’ Jamie said.
They broke out laughing, loud and obnoxious.
Lisa grabbed Shay’s arm.
‘Shay, don’t.’
‘I likes what you’re wearing there, Lisa, tight jeans and high heels,’ Jamie shouted. ‘Oh, I likes that.’
Lisa pulled at Shay. His face was pale with rage.
‘Just ignore them.’
‘You should tell the manager of the project about those fucks,’ Shay said, ‘get them barred from the centre.’
‘That’d just give them more attention and end up giving me more hassle out there. Anyway, they come from a horrible family.’
‘So that means they can abuse community workers like you, people who are actually trying to help them?’
Shay got the tickets for the film. He was raging.
‘Listen, when we get home you can let your frustration out on me,’ she said, sneakily putting her hand against his crotch. ‘Okay?’
Shay almost jumped when his phone rang, the memories evaporating. He held his hand against the kitchen counter, his wrist throbbing.