Cali knocked on the door and pulled her coat closed. She’d spent the night pretending to be asleep for Uncle Cal’s sake. That last thing he needed was to be worried about her, but she could tell he was when he kept rolling over, calling her name during the night. Eventually she stopped answering, hoping that it would give him a sense of peace that she’d finally fallen asleep. But then he’d started calling her mother’s name. It was as if he couldn’t rest, as if he was wrestling with something.
Morgan opened the door, a spatula in one hand and an oven mitt on the other. “Hey.”
He motioned her into the house. “Come on in, I have some eggs on the stove.”
As they neared the kitchen, she pulled off her gloves. “I’m sorry to stop by unannounced. I went to Red’s this morning and everything was so quiet. I guess I just wanted to see my friend. Is she up?”
“Been up all morning. She had a rough night, pretty uncomfortable. Plus, she’s worried about you. Coffee?”
“Yes. I don’t want her worried. Then I’ll worry about her. That baby needs to stay in there for a while longer.”
He poured piping hot coffee into an empty mug and slid it over to her. “Tell me about it,” he agreed. “Something tells me that the baby will make a grand entrance when she’s ready, and at the right time.”
“She?” she asked.
“I think it’s a girl.” He set a bottle of creamer and a container filled with sugar in front of her. “I’m ready to find out for sure. Don’t tell her I said that, though.”
She watched as Morgan finished cooking. He’d been through a similar ordeal as a child, losing his biological parents to their bad choices. “How did you do it?” she asked.
He poured the scrambled eggs onto three plates and set the pan into the sink. “Do what?”
“Live without your parents.”
He smoothed a long finger over his eyebrow. “I didn’t. I had two awesome parents.”
“I know that, but… you lost both of your biological parents, and your grandmother. How did you do it?”
“I don’t think anyone ever has a set way they deal with things,” he said. “I hated my father, so when he died I wasn’t that hurt. My mother… she pretty much only lived for my father. It hurt when she died, but I’d already lived with the Smiths for years. I’d only talked to my mother a handful of times.” He shrugged and picked up thick pieces of bacon from the skillet and placed them on each plate.
“My mother pretty much deserted me,” she admitted. “The thing is I remember things about her; I remember being happy with her. But somewhere along the line, she morphed into this horrible person who made my life worse. She didn’t give me any stability. I grew to this point where I was happy she was gone because at least I didn’t have to tell her I hated her.”
“If you remember good things, why would you hate her?” he asked.
“She told me she didn’t want me.” She finished her story as she fixed her coffee the way she liked it. “That was before she left me in a hotel room by myself. I think I was about sixteen when I realized that I liked life with Uncle Cal better than I ever did with my mother. He was there for me through everything. And the thought of not having him, not being able to call him…”
Morgan leaned against the counter. “I understand the feeling. When I lost my grandmother, I was inconsolable. I get it. Then when Papa Smith died, we all struggled without his presence. I think you always miss them, but you move on.”
“Last night, in his sleep, Uncle Cal kept saying my mother’s name. It was like he was trying to tell her something. Makes me wonder if he sees her or something. I’ve heard the stories about people near death seeing their loved ones. I want to be able to be okay with him moving on, but I’m not. Actually, I wanted to scream at him to stop saying her name.”
“Can I ask you a question?” he asked.
She took a sip from her mug. “Yeah, if you hand me a plate of food.”
Chuckling, he placed a full plate in front of her and scooped some grits into a bowl. “Salt and pepper? Or heaven forbid, sugar?”
She grinned. Sydney insisted on having her grits with a lot of butter and a heaping spoonful of sugar. “Salt and pepper for me. I never did understand why Syd liked sugar on her grits. Makes me think of oatmeal.”
“Thank you,” he said. “She and Red are a trip with that.”
“Red eats his either way.”
He nodded. “True. Anyway, do you think if your mother was still alive, you’d be able to forgive her?”
“No.” Throughout her childhood, she’d tried to rationalize her mother’s behavior. But, no matter how sick in the head she was, or how many drugs she took, there was just no excuse. “How could a mother treat her child like scum on the bottom of her shoe? When I think about how much I loved her and wanted her to love me back, I get angry all over again.”
“I used to wonder how I’d react if my father ever came and apologized to me, for everything he put me and Den through, if I’d be able to forgive him. A couple months ago, I would have said a resounding hell no. And now… I can’t muster up enough energy to hate him anymore.”
She wondered if she’d ever feel that way about her mother. She guessed Morgan’s about-face had something to do with the fact that he was going to be a father himself.
“He did give me life, no matter how fucked it was back then,” Morgan continued. “At the end of the day, he was just him. I’m sure we’d never be cool if he was alive, but I can’t deny that life with him taught me things I’d never have learned otherwise.”
Cali stabbed at her eggs with her fork. Morgan and Den had grown up in the suburbs, but behind closed doors their parents had been straight criminals. Eventually, they were caught and arrested. As a result, Children’s Protective Services were called in to take care of the boys. Kent had begged his parents to take them in and the rest was history.
“Your mother, she wasn’t a drug-dealing pimp,” he said. “She had problems, from what Syd told me. Those problems were in her mind. She used drugs to cover it up. Either way, her problems aren’t yours. It took me a long time to know that about my parents. It’s not easy, though.”
“I don’t even want to talk about her anymore,” Cali grumbled. “Didn’t mean for this conversation to go in that direction. I just wanted to know how to deal with my uncle’s death.”
“He’s not dead yet,” Morgan said.
She smiled, her mind drifting to a similar conversation she’d had with Red. “True.”
“Stop focusing on the ‘when.’ Enjoy him while he’s here. Ask him all the questions you need to know the answers to.” Morgan topped off her mug with more coffee. “Know, at the end of the day, you had a great father. He loves you and he’s always done anything in his power to protect you. Come on… let me take your friend her plate before she starts calling me.”
She picked up her food and her mug and followed Morgan through his house, down the hallway leading to his bedroom.
When they walked into the bedroom, Syd’s eyes lit up. “Cali?”
“Hey, girlfriend.”
Morgan grabbed a tray and set the plate on top of it. “Eat,” he ordered. “I’m going to try and get some work done.”
“Thanks, babe.” Syd said, taking a bite of her bacon. When he leaned down to her face, she gave him a quick peck. “Love you.”
“Love you, too,” he said. “Let me know if you need anything else, ladies.”
Once he left, Cali climbed into bed next to Syd. “You are so spoiled. Morgan did his thing on this breakfast, though.”
“Breakfast is his specialty. But truthfully, I would have rather fixed my own breakfast. Bed rest is not what’s up.”
They giggled and Cali bit into her crescent roll. “I know you’re going stir crazy.”
“Yes, I am. I should be at the bar handling business, but no… I’m stuck here all day. There’s only so much TV a person can watch.”
“Girl, there is never enough Investigation Discovery Channel,” Cali said.
“I thought the same thing—until I sat here and watched it all day.” Syd laughed. “Anyway, how’s Uncle Cal?”
“He’s… the same. He was sleeping when I left. I was talking to Morgan earlier about losing parents.”
“Yeah, he’s had a lot of loss.”
“I know.” Cali picked up her mug and cradled it in her hands. “But it turned into a conversation about my mother.”
“Yikes. I know that wasn’t something you were happy to revisit,” Syd picked up another piece of bacon.
“I guess it’s partly my fault, because I mentioned that Uncle Cal was calling for her.”
Syd stopped chewing the bacon she’d plopped into her mouth.
“It threw me for a loop,” Cali admitted. “Even made me a little angry.”
Swallowing visibly, Syd guzzled the rest of the bottled water that had been sitting on her nightstand. “I can see how that would make you angry. It’s kind of weird that he was calling her name.”
“Go ahead and say it,” Cali said, knowing what her friend was thinking.
“It’s just that whenever I’ve heard of someone who’s… near death calling someone who already died, it’s not good.”
“I know.” Cali’s appetite was suddenly gone and she slid her half-eaten breakfast on the tray next to Syd’s. “Have you heard from Red?” she asked, changing the subject.
“He called Morgan last night, told him the good news about Corrine. They should be able to come home soon.”
She hooked her arm in Syd’s, who didn’t let that stop her from finishing her food. “Girl, you are on a mission with that breakfast.”
Syd barked out a laugh. “I’m eating for two now.” She bumped her. “Seriously, though. This bacon is the truth.” She held up a piece like a beacon in the sky before she popped it in her mouth.
“I’m so scared, Syd,” Cali cried softly.
“Aw, babe.” Syd pulled her closer and wrapped her arms around her. “I know. It can’t be easy. I wish I could be there with you at the hospital.”
“I wish you could, too.” She rubbed her friend’s round belly and leaned closer. “My little godchild needs to bake a little longer,” she said to her stomach.
Syd gasped and grabbed her hand, planting it on the side of her stomach. “Feel that. The baby kicked for you. That means you need to babysit.”
Cali snatched her hand away. With a wide grin on her face, she chuckled. “Really Syd? What does that have to do with babysitting?”
“Well, you spoke to the baby and he likes your voice so he kicked.”
“He?” Cali thought back to Morgan referring to the baby as a girl earlier. “I think maybe you and Morgan need to get on the same page with this baby. He thinks it’s a girl.”
“I know that,” she said, waving her off. “It’s probably a girl, but I want to give the baby love in case it’s a boy.”
“O… kay. I think the baby is going to be beautiful, whatever it is.”
“Yep, and it’s going to have a great babysitter.”
Cali smacked Syd’s hand lightly. “Stop. On another topic… Can you believe I miss Red already? He hasn’t even been gone for a full day.”
Syd squeezed her friend. “You are so gone. And I couldn’t be happier to see you going through it for a change.”
The girlfriends laughed and caught up for another hour before Cali yawned. Finally relaxed, Cali hugged one of Syd’s pillows and drifted off to sleep.
A few hours later, Cali awoke with a start, jumping out of the bed. She glanced at the empty spot where Syd had been. Where is she? Picking up her phone, she checked for missed calls. Four missed calls from the hospital. Shit.
She tapped in the number to the nurse’s station on Uncle Cal’s floor. “Hello?” she said when a nurse answered. “This is Calisa Harper. My uncle is Calvin Harper. I’m returning someone’s call.”
“Ms. Harper, I’m glad you called. I’m Mr. Harper’s nurse. The doctor asked me to call you. Are you close to the hospital?”
“Yes, I can be there within twenty minutes. Is he okay?”
“There was an episode earlier. Our nurse went to check on your uncle and he’d pulled his oxygen out and slipped into a semi-conscious state. We had to insert a nasotracheal tube to aid him in breathing.”
Cali’s stomach churned and she swallowed. “He’s on a ventilator?”
“Yes.”
“I’m on my way.” Ending the call, she wiped her face and went off in search of Morgan and Syd. Nearing the kitchen, she heard their voices and walked in. Syd was sitting at the table with Morgan. Her legs were draped across his lap and he was massaging her feet.
“Hey guys,” she said.
“Hi babe!” Syd said. “I figured I’d let you sleep some. You were exhausted.”
“I have to go.”
“What’s wrong?” Syd asked, concern in her hazel eyes.
“The hospital called. They had to put him on a ventilator. I have to go.”
Morgan stood up and grabbed his keys off the counter. “I’ll drive you there.”
“No, it’s okay. I have my car.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t drive like this,” Syd added.
“I’m fine,” Cali insisted. “I’ll call you when I get there.”
She hugged Syd, then Morgan, and left.