Nella
“That’s amazing. I’m so happy for you.”
Ama smiles big as she slides a glass of wine across the island.
I was so eager to tell someone the good news, I ended up knocking on Fletch’s door but no one answered. So instead I turned to the main house where I found Ama alone in the kitchen.
I just filled her in on the latest news.
“Don’t tell me you’ll be hurrying back to Canada?”
I’ve considered it. It certainly seems like the most logical move, but Pippa will need continued care and rehab until she has full functionality back. She’s experiencing problems with balance, concentration, coordination, and despite some of her memory coming back, there are still huge chunks missing. I hesitate to drag her back to Cranbrook and transfer her care there. It would mean more tests, more prying and prodding, and she’s had enough of that over the past week or so.
But staying here means not only finding a place for us to stay, but giving the college my notice. I’ll probably have to do that anyway, since Pippa will need my help wherever we end up.
“I honestly don’t know what to do. Either way, I’m going to have to quit my job, but other than that I don’t want to rush into any decision. If I could find a short-term rental in town that would be perfect.”
“A rental? You can stay here as long as you want,” she offers.
Very kind, but I’m sure Jonas would have something to say about that. Besides, the cabin is a little small for the two of us with only one bedroom. I also think it’s better to create some distance from Fletch, it makes for a cleaner—maybe less painful—break.
“I really appreciate your hospitality but I think in addition to needing a little more space, I’ve probably overstayed my welcome already.”
“What’s going on?”
Thomas, Jonas’s father walks in with Alex right on his heels.
“Nella’s sister is being released tomorrow,” Ama volunteers.
“That’s great news!” Alex walks over and gives my shoulder a squeeze. “You must be so happy.”
Her smile is contagious and I flash one back.
“I am. Her memory actually started coming back today. She knows who I am, she is starting to remember little things from our past.”
“Couldn’t be more pleased for you, girl,” Jonas’s father weighs in. “Is your sister a looker like you?”
“Christ, Thomas.” Alex swats his shoulder. “Did you not hear your cardiologist just now? You need to slow your strut.”
I sip my wine and listen with half an ear to the three of them exchange banter.
It’ll be hard to leave here and not just because of Fletch. The only two actually related by blood are Jonas and his father, but everyone here is family and for a while I could imagine being part of it too.
So yes, I’m sad for losing that fantasy I allowed myself, but I have to focus on Pippa. I’m her family and she needs me.
“…can meet Lucy.”
I only catch half of what Alex says to me. “Sorry?”
“Ama mentioned you need a place big enough for the two of you and I have a solution. You know I own the horse rescue on the way into Libby?”
I nod. “Hart’s Horse Rescue. Yes, I’ve seen the sign in passing.”
“My manager and good friend, Lucy, lives there alone since I moved out earlier this summer. It’s a big rambling farmhouse with plenty of empty space. I was just saying you should come with me tomorrow morning and meet with Lucy. She’s been talking about getting a roommate, and if the space suits you, it may be a great solution for everyone.”
It takes me a moment to process what she’s saying, but she’s right; it would be perfect. We’d be closer to Libby, have lots of room to give each other space, we’d still be close to nature, which I know Pippa would like, plus…there are horses, which she loves.
So perfect in fact, it prompts me to ask, “How much?”
“You’ll have to haggle with Lucy over money, that’s her decision. How about I pick you up early; seven okay with you? I’ll give Lucy a heads-up tonight and we can get all that sorted out over breakfast. Lucy’s a great cook, but it wouldn’t hurt to bring her a sample of your baking,” Alex suggests with a wink.
I mentally take stock of the supplies I have left at the cabin just as the group of men floods into the kitchen. Everyone except Fletch, that is.
It takes me ten minutes to untangle myself politely and hustle out the door, but Sully catches me on the porch.
“Good to hear your sister’s gonna be released.”
“Yeah, it’s great news.”
“So what’s the plan? You sticking around for a bit, or rushing off right away?”
There’s an odd weight to his question, borderline accusatory. A deep groove between his heavy eyebrows shows his intensity and almost has me feeling guilty.
“We’ll probably be around for a little while. Give Pippa a chance to get her feet back under her.”
He seems almost relieved at my response.
“Good. Fletch is a good man. Salt of the earth. I don’t like to see him hurt.”
Hang on a second. What exactly is going on here?
“I don’t like to see anyone hurt,” I counter but I doubt if he hears me, he’s already heading back inside.
Was he implying I did something to Fletch? That’s laughable. I’m the dumpee here, if you want to put it that way. I’m not sure what he’s been telling his buddies, but I aim to find out.
I’m hopeful when I see Fletch’s truck still parked out front—at least he hasn’t gone far—but when I try his door, there’s still no answer. Looks like I won’t get an answer tonight, but if the man wants to avoid me there’s not much I can do. Hopefully by the end of tomorrow I can start forgetting about him.
Although the thick lump in my throat tells me it might not be as easy as that.
Fletch
Jesus Christ.
I don’t only feel like shit, I smell like it too.
When I crack an eye, the first thing I see is the bottom of an empty bottle.
Right. Guess I owe Jonas a bottle of good bourbon.
Beyond the bottle I see a familiar pair of horse hooves standing in straw. How the hell did I get in here?
“Still here?”
I roll on my back and end up staring at King’s underside, which does nothing for my churning stomach. Struggling to sit up, I find Bo hanging over the stable door.
“What time is it?”
“It’s almost nine. You’re a fucking mess, brother.”
He doesn’t need to tell me that. I lean my head in my hand, encountering a clump of something in my hair. I need a fistful of Tylenol and a shower.
“Where is everyone?”
Bo’s booming laugh reverberates in my skull as he walks away.
I understand why when I finally stumble out of the stable and everyone is standing around the corral watching Dan work with a young, feisty colt. Every eye turns my way.
Pretty tough walking with your head held high when it feels like your brains are leaking from your ears.
“You owe me a bottle,” Jonas mumbles when I pass him.
“Yeah.”
Ducking my head farther, I make my way to my cabin, hoping like hell Nella isn’t witnessing my walk of shame from somewhere. I’ve pretty much decided I’ll have to talk to her, but I’d prefer doing it without alcohol leeching from my pores and horseshit stuck to my hair.
Forty-fucking-seven years old. You’d think I’d be past drowning myself in a bottle.
My shower lasts close to half an hour, long enough to clear some of the cobwebs and scrub the stench of bourbon and manure from my skin. Clean, somewhat coherent with the aid of a strong cup of coffee, and with a vague idea of what I’m going to say, I knock on Nella’s door.
“You missed her.”
I turn to see Sully standing on his porch.
“Van’s here,” I return.
“She left with Alex hours ago.”
“Where to?”
“They didn’t say, I didn’t ask.” He starts to move inside but leans back at the last minute. “Oh, I almost forgot—Jonas is looking for you. He needs you in the breeding barn.”
That’s where I spend the next few hours, keeping my head down and human interactions to a minimum. When a report comes in late afternoon of a colt breaking through the fence around one of the rear pastures, I volunteer to go chase him down. King needs some exercise anyway and I feel like I have some penance to do, I’ve been an ass.
The fresh air does me good. I have the colt rounded up and back on the right side of the fence in no time, and manage to patch the hole in the setting sun. The lights of the ranch are already on, providing a beacon in the dusk, and I realize how much of a home this place has become.
A home that now includes Nella as well.
I leave King in his stall with a pile of fresh hay and head for the cabins, determined to straighten a few things out with her. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out she’s not home—her van isn’t parked outside—but I knock on her door anyway. When there’s no answer, I show myself in to confirm what part of me already suspects.
There is no sign of her. No shoes by the door, book on the coffee table, or sweater tossed over the back of a kitchen chair. The fridge is empty, as is the bathroom, and the bed is stripped bare.
Fuck.
She’s gone.