Largest infestation. You might think one head louse is too many. Spare a thought for the schoolchild discovered by Australian phthirapterist Rick Speare, who had 2,657 lice in his or her hair. This is a record 
unless you know different.
biggest louse. 8mm, Pecaroecus javalii, the louse of the Collared Peccary (Pecari tajacu), a type of American wild pig.
smallest louse. 0.35mm, Microphthirus uncinatus, the louse of the northern and southern flying squirrels (Glaucomys sabrinus and G. volans) in North and Central America.
Oldest louse-like insect. 130-million-year-old fossil named Saurodectes vrsanskyi, which has some louse-like features. At 17mm, it was also a giant and must have fed on a giant host.
Oldest true louse. 44-million-year-old fossil called Megamenopon rasnitsyni. The oldest known genuine louse, similar to modern feather lice, it probably fed on a prehistoric bird.
Largest collection of lice. It is said that the Aztec rulers demanded a tribute from the poorest members of their society in the form of sacks of head lice
There was no value in the lice; it was a ploy to keep idle fingers busy.
Unluckiest monkeys. The louse Pediculus mjöbergi occurs on Capucin, Howler and several other monkeys in Central and South America. It is so similar to human head lice that they were once thought to be the same species. DNA analysis now shows that P. mjobergi evolved from human head lice and the monkeys acquired them from the humans that colonised the Americas across the Bering Strait from Asia after the last Ice Age about 15,000 years ago. Poor old monkeys.
You need:
4mm (size 8) knitting needles
A scrap of double-knit wool (c. 2m) in pink or red
Abbreviations:
inc – increase
k2tog – knit two stitches together
loop – to make a loop, start knitting into the next stitch on the left-hand needle, i.e. insert the right-hand needle into the stitch, bring the yarn over the needle and pull it through, so that there’s a new stitch on the right hand needle. Now, instead of sliding the stitch off the left-hand needle, bring the yarn forward between the needles, wrap it twice around your left thumb to create a loop (aim for a loop about 4cm long) and, holding your loop in place, take the yarn back between the needles. Knit into the stitch which remains on the left hand needle and slide it off, as usual. You’ve now made two stitches on the right-hand needle; to fix the loop, bring the first (right hand) stitch over the second (left hand) stitch, as if you were casting off. Give the loop a tug to tighten it, then carry on knitting.
Cast on 3 stitches, leaving a long tail.
Row 1: k1, inc, k1 (4 stitches)
Row 2: k1, inc, inc, k1 (6 stitches)
Row 3: k6
Row 4: k1, inc, k2, inc, k1 (8 stitches)
Row 5: k8
Row 6: k1, inc, k4, inc, k1 (10 stitches)
Row 8: k2, make a loop into 3rd stitch, k4, make a loop into 8th stitch, k2
Row 9: k10
Row 10: k2, loop, k4, loop, k2
Row 11: (k2tog) × 5 (5 stitches)
Row 12: k1, loop, k1, loop, k1
Row 13: k2tog, k1, k2tog (3 stitches)
Row 14: k3
Row 15: k3tog (1 stitch)
Draw the yarn through the remaining stitch, pull tight and cut off, sewing the end in.
Use the long tail to sew up the central seam of the nit, matching the two sides up and joining them together (make sure that the legs are on the outside). When you’re half way up, stuff the body lightly (you can use a left-over bit of wool for this), then sew up to the top and finish off. Clip the yarn short, leaving a 3mm end to make a ‘mouth’ for your nit
Finally, tie a knot in each of the legs and clip the ends off, so that they’re all the same length.
Knitting pattern by Kirsty Gordon.