The scents of succulent roasted meat and braised vegetables still hung in the air at Samuel’s residence. The meal had been one of the finest Evelyn had ever consumed, even at the multitude of society parties she’d attended. Warm light cascaded from the parlor fireplace as she, Samuel, and the children settled down for tea.
Samuel, dashing with his neatly combed hair, freshly shaven jaw, and skillfully tied cravat, sat comfortably in a wing-back chair. Emily twirled in a blue silk dress, and little Benjamin was precious in his pressed lapels and shined shoes. The house filled with the children’s laughter and, for the moment, she could forget all the troubles that existed outside the walls of this one cozy townhome.
She settled on the settee and arranged her skirts, watching Samuel ruffle Benjamin’s hair. What would it be like to have a family like this? To have a home filled with easy laughter? Despite her every attempt to keep her mannerisms in check, Samuel Flynn managed to tease silly giggles out of her. And for some uncanny reason, that only made her feel more comfortable with him. Almost as though she belonged.
His gaze found hers across the room, and the confident smile that turned his lips sent her mind a-flutter. Did he share these uncanny stirrings? His kiss and tender words in the hospital said he did. But why? Why, when she’d confessed so much to him? Could he not see these feelings were impossible? That they were supposed to be enemies?
A tug at her skirt brought her gaze to the wide brown eyes of little Emily. The child clutched a book to her chest, wary hope on her face.
“Would you like me to read to you now?”
Emily’s smile was sunshine breaking through the clouds, and before Evelyn could react, the girl climbed into her lap and snuggled against her. Evelyn glanced at Samuel, and the expression on his face nearly stopped her heart. She darted her gaze to Benjamin, who stood by his father’s side watching Evelyn closely. He would not be as easily won.
She opened the book and began a tale of a heroic king, his fair queen, and the knights of a round table. The children sat in rapt attention, and for a time she lost herself in the adventure of the story. By the time she reached the end of the first chapter, however, Emily snored softly in her lap, and Benjamin had taken a place at her feet.
The little boy’s eyes were filled with wonder. “Why, you read even better than Mr. Flynn!”
Warmth spread in her cheeks, but she didn’t dare a glance at Samuel. “Mr. Flynn?”
Benjamin’s little face scrunched. “Yeah, did you forget his name?”
Looking over the top of Emily’s downy hair, Evelyn couldn’t help but smile. “Of course not. I’ve just never heard a child call his Papa by a formal name before.”
The boy shifted back on his heels and tilted his head. “He didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?” Evelyn caught Samuel’s eye, but he merely offered a lopsided grin.
“Me and Emily are orphans. Our Ma was sick and left us with the nuns when Emily weren’t no more’n a babe.” He tossed his thumb over his shoulder. “Mr. Flynn brought us home with him, and he’s our guardian now.”
She drew Emily against her, her hammering heart sure to wake the little darling. Her words came out breathy. “No, he didn’t mention that.” She spoke to Benjamin, but her eyes were on Samuel.
“He didn’t want me and Emily to be separated,” Benjamin continued, “so he’s letting us live here. Emily says he’s our new father, but I keep telling her she shouldn’t say that.”
“Why not?” Samuel’s voice spread through the room, the first words he’d spoken since entering the parlor. “We could be a family, couldn’t we?”
Benjamin turned and she could no longer see his expression. “You really mean that?”
Samuel regarded the boy with all the seriousness of an accomplished physician, a man whom anyone could take one look at and judge sincere and honest. “Nothing would please me more.”
Benjamin shoved his hands in his pockets. “Well, all right then.” He glanced back at Emily in Evelyn’s lap. “I, uh, better go get Mrs. Tooley to take her to bed.”
“A wise idea,” Samuel agreed. “Thank you.”
The child scurried away, leaving them in silence for several moments. Heat radiated in Evelyn’s chest that had nothing to do with the child snuggled against her. She allowed herself the pleasure of resting her chin on Emily’s head and tried to find a safe topic of conversation. “Does she ever speak to anyone other than Benjamin?”
Samuel sat back in his chair and rubbed his hand through his hair, tousling it. “She does, but I still haven’t gotten her to say much.” He lifted his eyebrows. “She’s sure taken a liking to you, though.”
“I’d say,” Mrs. Tooley said, sweeping into the parlor. “Why, it took me nigh on two weeks to get that little ‘un to sit with me like that.”
Evelyn reluctantly handed over the child, an ache forming in her heart. “She’s such a beautiful girl.”
Mrs. Tooley scooped her up and then sent a questioning look to Samuel.
“The hour is growing late,” he said, rising. “I shall escort Miss Mapleton to her hotel.”
Evelyn bade the nanny a good evening and moved to the foyer, where Samuel helped her put on her cloak. She tied the strings around her throat and pulled on her gloves, telling herself she had no reason to feel sorrow. It had been a refreshing reprieve from the depressing nature of the hospital and the time spent alone in the hotel room, but it had come to an end.
Once outside in the biting wind, she pulled the hood over her head. Samuel offered his arm, and she looped her hand around his elbow, his touch immediately taking her back to the feel of his lips upon hers. Thankfully, he couldn’t see the heat in her cheeks.
“Would you prefer to walk or take a carriage?”
Walking would further tire her aching feet, but it would afford her more time at his side. “I’m content to walk.”
They strode in silence for a few moments before he spoke. “I would like to discuss some things with you.”
He’d come to his senses and could no longer entertain such dangerous thoughts about a Secesh woman. “I assumed you would.”
He placed his free hand over her fingers on his elbow. “Although Dr. Porter dallies in completing my licensing, I take my role as a physician very seriously.”
Not where she thought the conversation would be headed. “As well you should,” Evelyn replied. “It’s an important role, especially with this war.” She shook her head and drew closer to his side as she skirted a puddle. “I’ve heard tales of so-called doctors who read a field manual and think they are capable of tending the wounded.”
Samuel chuckled. “My father is going to like you.”
“Is your family nearby?”
“They live in Maryland, but they’re scheduled to arrive in the later part of next week. With this war, their first visit with the children has been delayed much longer than anticipated. They were rather surprised by my new situation, but they are looking forward to meeting Benjamin and Emily. My mother, especially, is greatly anticipating fawning over the children.”
The glow from streetlamps pooled along the path as they turned a corner and started down another street. Like giant fireflies, their light danced and swayed in the cool night air. “Not many men would take on two orphaned children.”
“Ah, well, I can’t explain it really.” His hand tightened over her fingers. “There was just something about them I couldn’t let go. It was as though God himself placed a love for them in my heart I could not ignore. They’ve been a great blessing to me.”
Evelyn’s heart flounced.
“But that is not what I need to discuss with you,” he said, a smile in his voice. “You have the most uncanny ability to derail my thoughts.”
Unsure how to respond, she merely continued the simple pleasure of walking at his side. She had known the evening couldn’t last. War would steal from her the irrational longings that she had known better than to let fester in her heart. Tears burned at the back of her throat, but she refused to let them take hold.
“As I said, I take my position seriously. I believe it is my duty to care for the wounded.”
“And you do an exemplary…”
He squeezed her hand and slowed his pace, making her lose the end of her sentence. “Evelyn, if I may.” At her nod, he continued. “I’ve made an oath that I’ll do all in my power to bring healing, even as this war brings bloodshed. I will care for every person who comes to me in need of medical care, regardless of gender, uniform, or skin color.” He stopped under a street lantern and turned her to face him. “Do you understand?”
Having seen him care for Alice, and knowing he’d angered Dr. Porter and most of the rest of the hospital staff by insisting the Confederate soldiers at the infirmary be properly tended, she’d seen that commitment in action. “Of course I do.” It was one of the things she admired about him.
Perhaps even loved about him.
The thought nearly stole her breath. No! She could not love a Yank! She was merely infatuated by his generosity, kindness, and…oh, my, he was looking at her with that tenderness again.
Samuel placed a hand on her shoulder. “I need to know that you truly do understand what it means to me. Under no circumstances would I want to aid in causing more men to end up in my hospital. Or any other, for that matter.”
She stared into his eyes, trying to get her fumbling brain to understand what he meant by such a statement. Of course he wouldn’t want more men injured. None of them did.
“I need you to promise me.”
Anything. The word stuck in her mouth.
He leaned closer. “Evelyn, I need you to promise me you will not do anything that will cause more men injury. That you’ll work to bring healing and not death.”
Her mouth was too dry. She swallowed. What did he think of her? “Why would you think I wanted to bring death? I have worked my body to exhaustion tending the sick and wounded. I would never wish them further harm.”
Samuel’s fingers clung to her shoulders, his gaze intense. “Then promise me. Promise me you will do nothing to further the war and will help me bring healing until it ends.”
Heart hammering, she nodded. Of course she wanted to see this war end and healing come.
“Say it, then, please.”
How could she deny any request that came from this earnest man? He spoke with such conviction, such honest care for his patients. “I promise, Samuel. I’ll do everything I can to help you bring healing.”
The flickering light of the lamp above him washed over his relieved features, and he heaved a sigh that expanded his chest and sent a puff of air across the fur rimming her hood. “Thank you.” He lifted her hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss there, and she wished she weren’t wearing gloves.
He threaded her hand around his elbow once more, and they continued to the hotel, the topic of conversation only occupying half of her thoughts. They purposely ignored the glaring issue that stood between them, no matter what noble promises were made. He was a Yank, she a secessionist. That gulf could not be spanned, yet with every passing moment, she longed ever more to build an impossible bridge. Couldn’t they escape somewhere, just them and the children? Disappear out in the western territories, where war would be little more than words splashed across the newssheets?
“Evelyn?”
“Oh!” She turned to look at his profile. “Forgive me. What did you say?”
“I asked if I may call upon you, and if you would like to have dinner with my parents when they arrive.”
How had she missed something that important? As they neared the doors to her hotel, Evelyn stopped a short distance from the doorman. Could she let her heart continue on this path? He would never leave his patients, and the west would be no place for two children who needed stability, not the frontier. Such wild, foolish notions.
“Samuel, how could you ask such a thing, knowing all you do about me?”
He stared at her, conflict evident on his face.
“You know I shot a man. I didn’t kill him, but I certainly sent him to the hospital.”
“You did it to protect, Evelyn. That’s different.”
“Still, I fear I may have let my father’s ardent opinions and my family’s disinterest in me grow into a hatred that I shouldn’t have—” Her words caught, but she cleared her throat and continued. “Don’t you see? You are a Yankee doctor, and I am…” Her voice trailed away.
“You’re what?” Samuel said. “I’ve seen you work tirelessly by my side in two different Union hospitals. What exactly does that make you?”
A traitor. Her father would be sorely disappointed. “I’m still what you all venomously call a Rebel.”
“So is my sister.”
His words hung in the air, and she stumbled over her next heartbeat. “What?”
Samuel rubbed his hands together. “My sister married a man from South Carolina. When the war started, her husband sided with the South. My sister had to decide if she stood with the family of her youth or the family she’d started with her husband.” He gave a small shrug. “None of us blame her for siding with her husband. The Word says that husband and wife are to be one.”
Evelyn wrapped her arms around herself. “That had to be difficult.”
“Especially for my parents. It’s hard to see families torn asunder merely because they believe different things about politics.”
“Indeed.”
“But this war is much more than government, taxes, and tariffs. It’s about people who have been treated with a grave injustice. When the Israelites cried out, God heard them in their enslavement and brought about their freedom through the great plagues. Have you ever thought this war is our own plague for allowing our country, a country founded as one nation under God, to enslave and degrade our fellow man just because he has a different skin color?”
Evelyn opened her mouth, and then closed it. She’d never believed in slavery, but truth be told, she’d spoken with more conviction over taxes than she had people’s lives. A pang of guilt pierced her heart. And how had she felt to learn that her own family looked down upon her merely because of her heritage? Something she was certain Samuel would never do. “Slavery is an ugly thing. And no, it should not be allowed to continue. If only we had been able to bring it to an end without war.”
His hands warmed her shoulders. “And if only we were able to settle our differences about politics and tariffs as one nation. But the time for if only has passed. I believe the only way to bring healing is for the country to stay intact and for freedom to come to the people of this land.”
“And you believe that marauders disguised as soldiers have the right to pillage and steal to make that happen?” She could not help the edge that colored her tone. Some things were not easily forgotten.
“I do not.” Samuel’s voice had an edge she’d not heard from him before. “Committing evil to end evil accomplishes nothing but further heartache. It is a deep shame there will always be men who do evil in the sight of the Lord.”
Ida’s words came back to her. It seemed the Confederate soldiers had committed atrocities as well, though she’d chosen to ignore it.
“War is unspeakably ugly, and it’s out of our control.” He eased closer, much too close for what would be proper in public. Especially at night. But she did not step away. She tilted her head to keep his intense gaze. “We can only control our own actions. We can only seek to follow God’s will as best we can. And as Paul says, ‘If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.’”
He grabbed both her hands and gave them a squeeze. “Evelyn, if your father were here, I would like to speak my intentions to him. But until you locate him, I will speak them to you in his stead.”
She could only blink. It was too much, too fast.
“I intend to try to spend more time with you and to get to know more about the wonderful woman I know you to be.” A small smile tugged at his mouth. “I also intend to ask you once again if you will join my family for dinner.”
She blinked like a hapless fool, offering only a nod.
“I shall accept that.” He offered his arm. Samuel gestured toward the doorman, who did not attempt to hide his study of them. “But for now, it is best I return you to the hotel. We both need our rest.”
She allowed him to guide her to the door and somehow managed to repeat his words of farewell before hurrying through the lobby. She barely noticed the sparkling chandelier, the polished floors, or other patrons turning in for the night. Evelyn hurried past the maid lighting a wall sconce on her way up the large central staircase.
Did that man know what he did to her? Why, he nigh on turned her mind to mush! The pounding of her erratic pulse swelled in the back of her skull, causing an ache to spread through her head and down her neck.
On the second floor, she turned to the right, locating the room she and Alice shared. After fumbling the key in her trembling fingers, Evelyn finally opened the door and slipped into the privacy of her room. What she wouldn’t give for a tub full of hot water and—
“There you are.” Alice rose from the dressing table, her hair lying in wild waves across her shoulders.
Evelyn placed a hand to her chest. “Alice. I wasn’t expecting you to be here.”
“Where have you been?”
Evelyn set her jaw and draped her cloak over the back of a chair. How dare she ask with such accusation as though she were not the one usually out until late hours?
“I asked you a question.”
“No. You demanded an answer, and I don’t have to provide one for you.”
Alice dropped her wooden hairbrush on the marble-top dressing table. “My! Someone is defensive today.”
The pulse in the back of her head began to throb. “I don’t wish to quarrel with you. But as of late it seems that every time I do or say anything, you are immediately up in arms about it.”
The young woman Evelyn questioned if she could still call friend eyed her coolly. “You were with that doctor, weren’t you?”
Evelyn slipped behind the dressing screen and removed her petticoats. “What if I was? What does that matter to you?”
“It matters,” Alice said with a haughty sniff, “because you’re becoming too friendly with the enemy.”
The pulse gained strength and throbbed behind her left eye. She was too tired to argue. She unclipped her mother’s pearls and slid them inside a black velvet bag.
“Have you forgotten what happened to you in Martinsburg?”
Evelyn drew on her nightdress and stepped out, nearly bumping into Alice where she paced across the carpeted floor.
“What about in Front Royal?” Alice continued when Evelyn didn’t respond. “Don’t you remember our boys there? How terrible they looked?”
No worse than the Federal boys at Chain Bridge. “I’ve not forgotten.”
“Oh? Well, while Mrs. Greenman was being sent to prison, you were out with a Yankee.”
Evelyn turned down the heavy coverings on one side of the bed, then decided to stoke the fire.
“Did you at least deliver the message?” Alice grumbled.
It took Evelyn a moment to realize Alice referred to the detained soldiers at the infirmary. “Of course I did.” Heavens, Alice had been right there in the room with her! “I told him everything Mrs. Greenman requested. Now my debt is complete.”
Alice snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous. You think delivering one message makes up for all of this?” She gestured to their clothing and then around the fine room. “That’s hardly worth one meal and a night’s lodging, and we’ve used far more than that.” She grabbed a handful of her wild hair and twisted it into a braid.
“I don’t wish to be involved further. If that means I can no longer stay, then so be it.” Samuel would surely help her if she received a negative response to her inquiry at one last paper. It was her final hope of finding Daddy, and then she must face the choice of trying to return to Aunt Mary or starting a life on her own here in Washington.
Alice tied a ribbon at the end of the thick braid and tossed it over her shoulder. “We came here to aid the cause. Don’t forget that.”
Evelyn sat on the feather mattress and pulled the pins from her hair, allowing it to spill down her back. “Do you ever wish this war had never started?”
“It had to be done. And I think a lot of good will come out of it. The South will have independence, and I think women will gain more rights.”
“And what about the slaves?”
She shrugged. “I don’t give much mind to them. The abolitionists say the war is all about freeing the slaves, and the plantation men say it’s all about representation, property, and taxes.” She crossed the rug and climbed in on the far side of the bed. “None of that matters to me. I don’t care if the colored people are slaves or free. I just don’t want them taking jobs from hard working men like my brother.”
Evelyn reclined and drew the covers around her. “What do you think this war is really about?”
Alice blew out the candle. “All of that, I suppose. But the only people it matters to are the rich ones. People like me, we don’t get a say in all of that. We just get to suffer the consequences of men’s whims and folly.”
Perhaps she had a point.
“So,” Alice continued, “The way I see it, the only option left to poor folks is to try to save what we have and make the most of what comes our way. If the North wins, we could lose everything. If the South wins, then perchance my brother will have something to come home to. And maybe, at the end of it all, we women may have a few more options and a little more respect.”
She closed her eyes. The pounding in her head drummed, and she wished for sleep.
“We shall go see her tomorrow,” Alice said sternly.
“Who?”
“Mrs. Greenman, of course. We have something to do.”
Evelyn laid a hand over her face. “No. I told you I’m finished doing things for her.”
“She said you would say that.”
Good. Then it wouldn’t come as a shock.
“In which case, I am to withhold the letter from your father until we complete our visit.”
Evelyn bolted upright. “You have a letter from Daddy? Give it to me.”
“Once you go with me to the prison, it’s yours.”
Evelyn clenched her teeth, anger making her head ache more. “You have no right.”
“Perhaps. But as soon as you go, then it will be done. Your debt will be paid and you can have your letter. Then after tomorrow you can leave and do as you please.”
“That’s extortion.”
Alice turned on her side, leaving Evelyn to stew in the dark. She didn’t want to go to the prison, but she needed to know where Daddy was. Something must have happened to him. Otherwise he wouldn’t have left her for so long.
She drew a deep breath, letting tears slide down onto her pillow. As her skull throbbed, Samuel’s words pulsed with each beat of her heart.
Promise me, Evelyn.