Maya had never been a deep sleeper. She was too used to being woken up by yelling and broken dishes to really let herself sink into a deep rest.
That’s why she woke to whispers later that afternoon. The same day that she’d cried like a baby in Javi’s arms after she came. Her skin was still sticky from him. She was actually surprised that she’d napped. After most sexual encounters, she stayed awake, counting the minutes until she could sneak out.
But, after the conversation they’d had, the way he’d shown her that he was a different kind of man—one who wouldn’t turn tail and run as soon as she let him in—she could rest in his arms.
He was gone now, whispering with someone else in the other room. Maybe they were being quiet because he wanted to let her sleep. After today, that’s how she should think about it. She should give him the benefit of the doubt. But, the part of her that was always expecting the worst thought that they were just saying things that they hoped she wouldn’t hear.
She hesitated before getting out of bed and putting her dress back on. If they were talking about her, she wanted to know what they were saying. Maybe it was habit from all the times she’d eavesdropped on her parents. Knowledge as power. Not that it ever saved anyone grief. She couldn’t find her bra or panties, so she still felt almost naked when she walked out.
Javi wasn’t fully dressed either, but he was talking to his sister and another tall, freckled Latina who looked like Javi—Maya was guessing she was about to meet another part of his family.
Looking like she’d been through Hurricane Javi. Fucking perfect.
Four years ago, she might have turned sullen and sabotaged this, made sure that they hated her before they could come to that conclusion because of her dicey past and shitty prospects. Now, she was nervous. She wanted them to like her more than she wanted to protect herself.
The redhead spotted her first. “I am so sorry.”
“For what? I was the one that was rude.” Maya thought she’d done a good job because the redhead’s smile relaxed, became more genuine as she rushed over.
“I’m Javi’s baby sister, and I was a jerk to you.” She grabbed Maya’s upper arms like she was going to forcibly hug her, and Maya had to fight not to jerk away.
“Carla, right?” Maya looked at Javi, whose grim mouth and disheveled appearance made her think that this wasn’t an expected visit. “Makes sense given what your pendejo of a brother has said about you.”
Then Carla did hug her and she flinched before she could fully relax into it. She whispered so neither the other woman—Alana she would guess—could hear her, “I love that you think that my brother is an idiot and love him anyway.”
Love was a big word, one she wasn’t sure she was ready to use with Javi. But she couldn’t exactly deny it; she wasn’t sure she could do it convincingly. Carla released her after a brief embrace, but grabbed her arm and brought her over to the kitchen where Javi and Alana stood.
“I’m Alana, and I’m assuming that you’re Maya.” Alana was smiling in a way that looked a little mischievous. “I’m smiling because my fiancé, Cole, owes me money.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Alana,” Maya said. “Although, Cole Roberts, really? You’re way too pretty to be engaged to such a dickhead.”
“That’s what I tried to tell her,” Javi said. He moved and put his arm around her waist. She didn’t move away from his embrace, and both his sister’s beamed at them. So weird, this family.
“Well, he’s not a dickhead to me.” Alana shrugged. “Well, most of the time. On the rare occasion that he acts like an ass—usually because of this one”—Alana pointed at her brother— “I get presents or lascivious sex acts.”
Maya couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up or the instinct, new to her, that made her look to Javi to check on his reaction. He looked kind of green in response to his sister’s mention of her sex life, but she sympathized. As much as she’d always adored Cole, she had never wanted to do anything sexual with him. It would be like having sex with Felix. Gross. She’d often wished that she’d had the same kind of fraternal feelings for Javi. It would have made it so much easier to just be friends with him.
Carla piped in again. “So you and Javi are doing it now?”
“You have a seriously weird, invasive family, Javier.”
Javi kissed the back of her neck. It wasn’t sexual, it was proprietary, but it still heated her all over. This whole situation was disorienting. She wasn’t a meet-the-family kind of girl. Never had been. But every little touch he gave her in front of his sisters, making it clear that they were together, gave her a little more confidence that they could really be together, not just behind closed doors and pushed up against walls.
“Maya’s my girlfriend.” Javi’s statement was simple, but loaded. She had fantasized about what it would be like to be Javi’s girlfriend a thousand different times. Never had she imagined him saying it to his sisters after they’d found them together, lazing away a Sunday afternoon. She’d pictured going to his parents’ house, which she’d seen once in an issue of Ocean Drive.
But she wasn’t sure if she was comfortable with it now. What happened to “friends with benefits”? Although past Maya had wanted nothing more than to be with Javi for real, she wasn’t sure she was ready about it now. Her heart beat faster and she balled her fists, fighting the urge to walk out. She wasn’t prepared to be paraded in front of his friends and family. It felt out of control, and the urge to run was almost more than she could take.
“Seriously?” Alana’s question was incredulous, and Maya predicted that the other woman would disapprove, but her green eyes sparkled with delight. “I’m so glad you’re done banging models.”
Javi grunted, and Maya felt a pang of jealousy, mixed with disbelief at his sisters’ approval, deep in her gut. She didn’t like being reminded that Javi hadn’t come to find her after his divorce. He’d become a shitty fuckboy and she would always be reminded of that, no matter how long she and Javi stayed together.
“What are you ladies doing here?” Javi sounded impatient. He clutched her hip tighter, which assuaged her jealousy a bit.
“We were coming to pick you up for dinner,” Carla said. “Did you forget?”
“I totally did. I’m sorry.” Javi sounded apologetic. She looked up at his face again, prepared to have him ask her to leave. “Maya’s coming with us. Let me get decent.”
When he walked away, she felt cold, too cold. She wasn’t ready to face his sisters by herself. She’d barely kept herself from running out the door before he claimed her as his girlfriend.
And now that she was alone with these two women, these gorgeous, put-together, rich women, she wanted to melt into the floor.
But she was starting to feel that what she and Javi had together was real. She wanted to believe that they were going to be together as a couple for the long haul. So even though every survival instinct was telling her to go on the offensive, she didn’t. She hung back and waited.
That wait resulted in several tense moments, until Carla said, “You’re really mad at me. I know I can say thoughtless things, I don’t know.” She threw up her hands and blew air up so hard that it dislodged a strand in her bangs. “I liked you at the store, and I’m not great at making friends with normal people. Or, you know, women.”
Maya was confused for a second, and then remembered the shitty comment at the club about her not being able to afford fancy lingerie. Sure, she could stay pissed about that, but that wouldn’t be productive. And Carla had been so nice at the store, it didn’t make sense for her to hold it against her. “I barely remember what you said. It’s not a big deal. But you’d be surprised what some of the girls make at those clubs.” Carla’s face eased, and Maya took a step closer to the kitchen island. “I mean, quite a few of them work off the books, if you know what I mean.”
Alana piped in. “You mean, they’re hookers?” Something about the matter of fact way that Alana phrased it told Maya that they could be friends. She had this elegant way about her that made it impossible for anyone to forget that she was pure, classy rich girl. But, she didn’t mince words, and she’d teased her brother about the fact that she was fucking Cole Roberts, so that said something.
“Not precisely. They’re more like sugar babies for some of the high profile athletes and celebrities that come in.” Alana squinted, and Maya panicked. She probably thought that Maya was a sugar baby. “I don’t do that. I promise.”
She wanted to run again, before Alana said, “I don’t think you are. Cole filled me in on what went down between you and Javi while they were in business school. That’s why we had the bet going. He was betting that Javi was still acting like a scaredy-cat little boy, too afraid to go after you. I was betting that he’d been so on the ball at work recently for a reason.”
“You think I’m that reason?” Maya looked down at her tattoo-covered arms. They didn’t actually say super responsible adult lady.
Carla sighed. “Compared to some of the skanks that Javi has been getting with since his divorce, you are like Princess Kate.” Maya knew that Carla didn’t mean to hit on something that she felt icky about, but it didn’t change the fact that she’d reminded her that Maya hadn’t been Javi’s first choice, or his second choice. She’d happened back into his life because she’d taken a job bartending and he’d randomly shown up one night. “I shouldn’t have said that. You don’t like thinking about Javi with other girls.”
Alana looked exasperated with her little sister. “What she’s trying to say is that we think someone down-to-Earth and smart is good for Javi. Karrie was—and is—kind of a dipshit. From what Cole told me, you and my brother had a real friendship. He was too stupid to see how cool you were. Are.
“My brother isn’t as one-dimensional as my father wants him to be, never has been. Our father is a dinosaur. Until recently, he thought I would quit working as soon as I found a husband. He placed all of his hopes for the future of our family business on Javi for a long time.” Alana sighed and looked to Carla, as if she was unsure about whether or not to continue. Maya wanted to hear it all. The more insight she had in to why Javi had married Karrie when his feelings weren’t all there, the better. Carla nodded. “We’re working on our father. Until recently, we thought Javi was going to turn out just like him. God knows, they’re both stubborn.”
“Probably not as stubborn as me.” Maya and Javi had butted heads early and often. It was probably part of what made the chemistry between them so tangible.
“That’s good. Karrie wasn’t stubborn at all. She never stood up to our brother.” Carla spoke carefully now, like she didn’t want to spook Maya.
“Karrie wasn’t the right girl for Javi. I think we all saw that, but we didn’t say anything. We would have if we had known about you,” Alana said.
“But you don’t even know me.” They didn’t know her and their bald acceptance of her as Javi’s girlfriend gave her pause. How were they supposed to know that she was good for their brother? They’d walked in on them whiling away the day in bed.
Carla said, “But even the other night at the club, when Javi looked at you—when he yelled at me before he followed you—it was different. I think when Karrie left him, he felt hopeless. And he really committed to messing up once he saw how pissed our parents were about the divorce.”
“After he broke Cole’s face for starting to date me,” Alana said, “he started to get some of himself back. He apologized and started coming back to work again. But he was sad. Something’s changed in the past few weeks.”
Carla came up to Maya and laid a hand on her shoulder. Maya would definitely have to get used to how touchy the Hernandez family was. If she stuck around. If Javi wanted her around. “After seeing him with you here—he never brings girls here—we think the something that’s changed is you. You make him happy.”
Maya felt tears spring up. She wasn’t used to people wanting to be friends with her, especially rich girls. She usually kept them away pretty effectively with some sneers and scowls. “You guys need to chill out. For serious. I don’t even know how long I’m staying in Miami.”
Javi picked that moment to come out of the bedroom. She heard the door snick open mid-way through her last statement. She looked over her shoulder and he was carrying her shoes. He had to have heard what she said, but his face was impassive. “Ready to go?”
* * * *
Javi’s gut burned with something he couldn’t name. He couldn’t make Maya stick around. He was angry with himself for thinking that he could do it by fucking her so good that she couldn’t walk away. That was stupid, and juvenile.
And she’d probably had countless lovers since school. She was gorgeous and free and she had a kind of sensuality that people responded to. It was almost part of what made her an artist. She was art. Obviously, he wasn’t the only one who wanted to look at her.
He wasn’t the only one who wanted to touch her. He wasn’t saving her from being alone by wanting to be with her. Standing there, holding her shoes, he suddenly felt like a loser. Here he was, planning for a future with her, claiming her in front of his family, and she didn’t want him the same way she wanted him.
Fuck if he was going to be played for a fool by another woman.
Yet, the look on her face when she turned to him was something like hope dying. He knew that he looked cold. She pursed her lips and walked over to him, touched his stomach when she took her sandals from him.
He didn’t look at her as he said, “You’re coming with, right?” He could feel her disappointment, and he had to get away from it.
“Um, as long as it’s okay with your sisters?”
He looked at her then. Her mouth was in a tight line. Her back was straight and her chin up. He liked it better when her spine went slack and she opened to him. He needed that.
“I want you with me.” Their gazes touched, and for a few beats, his sisters were wise enough to stay silent.
“I want to be with you.” She looked over her shoulder. “We’re going to take my car. You should take Javi’s.”
Carla pumped her fist. “Javi never lets me drive his car. We’re going to have to figure out how to keep you around for that.”
Alana found his keys in the basket first though. “Not so fast grasshopper. I’m driving to the restaurant. I want to see how fast I can make his baby drive.” Javi looked pained as they walked out the door.
“I didn’t mean it.”
Javi didn’t intend for his words to come out harshly, but they did. “Didn’t mean what?”
“I just—this is so new that I don’t want your sisters to get their hopes up.” She touched his arm to steady herself while she slipped her shoes on. He wanted that to mean that she felt like he steadies her. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m an obligation or something your family expects.”
Seeing her so vulnerable and nervous about them made something in his chest clench. She still didn’t trust him. More than her body, he wanted her to trust him. He’d never thought he’d want to be with someone in a forever kind of way again, and he realized that he wanted that with her. At first, he’d only wanted her forgiveness. Now, he needed her love.
He turned her around. “When are you going to forgive me?”
“I do forgive you for marrying Karrie instead of me. But, while you were cleaning up.” She combed her fingers through her always-perfect hair, as though she just remembered that it might be mussed up from them having sex. “They talked about how you were fucking everyone after your divorce, and I realized that you weren’t going to come find me.”
Before he’d married Karrie—when she told him about her feelings for him—she’d told him to come find her if things didn’t work out. Until that moment, he’d pushed that out of his mind. He hadn’t wanted an easy way out of his marriage, so he’d convinced himself that her words were empty.
“I didn’t think you meant it.” Maya had too much pride to be anyone’s sloppy seconds.
“Of course I meant it, Javi.”
“It wouldn’t have been right. I didn’t want you to feel like second-place. You’re nobody’s second choice.”
“I offered that up to you, but only because it was you. And now I find out that I’m not your choice at all. You’d rather have any other girl in Miami—any other girl in the world—just not me.”
He pulled her close, her side to his. “I wasn’t worth your time after the divorce. I wasn’t worth anyone’s time.” He nosed the hair at the nape of her neck, in his favorite spot above her pulse, where he could smell himself on her skin, smell the two of them together. “Give me the chance to prove I’m worth your time now. I won’t let you down.”
“Okay.” Her voice was a ragged whisper, but he heard her. He heard that he only had one chance to make her believe that she was his first choice. His only choice because he didn’t want anyone else anymore.
He still wasn’t worth it, but he’d try to be for her.