Shades were drawn over the windows in the group therapy room and the lights were muted. As soon as Tracy walked in, she saw chairs arranged in a circle on the dark green carpet. Dr. Jarnow was seated in the center of the circle, his legs tightly crossed. He barely looked up at Tracy, just kept reading the notes that were scrawled on the long yellow pad on his lap.
Avery sat down next to Dr. Jarnow. “This session will be good for everyone,” she murmured, trying to reassure him.
“I’m not at all sure,” he responded quietly. “It certainly could be too soon for patients to discuss Maggie’s death and the last thing we need is a backlash.”
Then Dr. Jarnow motioned for Tracy sit a seat away from him, next to Avery.
As Tracy took her seat, he turned to her. “Remember,” he commanded, “this is not a time for grilling anyone!”
Tracy was about to answer, when fortunately the door slid open and patients began drifting in. Tracy watched them amble over to different chairs and sit down.
After the patients were settled, they looked over at Tracy, curiously. Clearly, no one had told them that she was going to join the group this afternoon. Tracy wondered who had actually arranged for her to be here.
Three seats were still empty and Tracy wondered who would occupy them. In a moment the door opened again and Ashley and another patient walked in. The woman with Ashley had huge green eyes, long, scraggly brown hair and an orange silk scarf wrapped around her neck, too tightly. That had to be Kaylna, Ashley’s roommate, thought Tracy.
After they sat down, the door opened once again and Enid entered. She took the last empty seat at the far end of the circle and immediately stared at Tracy.
“Finally, we are all gathered together,” Dr. Jarnow proclaimed. “Where were you, Enid?”
“Only a few minutes late,” Enid spoke to him forcefully. “It was hard getting through the hallways. Guards stopped me twice. It’s upsetting!”
A low murmur went up from the patients, as if agreeing.
“We all understand that things at Ashton will be different for a while,” Dr. Jarnow quickly interjected. “The guards are here to help us. They mean no ill. Right now our routines are being disrupted and we must learn to deal with it.”
That wouldn’t be easy, thought Tracy. She knew how desperately patients needed their routines, how much they depended upon them.
“The guards are here to protect us,” Virginia called out shrilly. Tracy remembered that she had been Maggie’s roommate.
“Protect us from what?” asked a young woman who sat limply at the far end of the circle, barely looking up.
“That’s Marcy,” said Avery to Tracy. “She’s extremely passive, lives in a world of her own, barely believes there’s a world outside her mind.”
As if she felt herself being spoken about, Marcy called out again. “Tell me, what are we being protected from?”
“Marcy has not yet fully realized what has gone on at Ashton.” Dr. Jarnow addressed his words to the other patients. “It takes time for events to sink in for all of us. For Marcy it takes even longer.”
Virginia seemed offended. She stood up and faced Marcy directly. “I see what’s in front of me, whether I like it or not,” she insisted. “My roommate’s gone. She died. I found Maggie on the floor, bleeding.”
“That’s not true.” Marcy became agitated now. “I saw Maggie yesterday. I talked to her in the dayroom.”
“Marcy’s sense of time is impaired,” Avery murmured to Tracy. “The other patients realize that. Most of the time they can be tolerant of one another. Of course, now it’s different. Everyone’s on edge.”
“Deidre died the same way a few weeks ago,” Hanna piped up then. “That’s why the guards are here and also this new lady!” Hanna focused on Tracy.
“I am here to support all of you,” Tracy spoke up. “I want to make sure nothing else bad happens.”
“Something bad always happens.” Hanna’s voice got louder as she suddenly stood and shook her head. “Whatever you do, you can’t stop it.”
“Sit down, Hanna,” Dr. Jarnow insisted. “We are all upset, but we sit still on our chairs and talk to each other calmly.”
“It’s all right, it’s all right,” Avery crooned to Hanna, trying to calm her.
“What’s all right about it?” Hanna barked back.
Avery leaned over to Tracy. “Hanna is bipolar and prone to manic episodes. So far she’s doing well on her meds and the group therapy has been working. She’s been getting worse since Maggie’s death. It’s to be expected.”
Hanna wouldn’t be silenced. “Answer me. What’s all right about it?”
Tracy jumped in. “There’s nothing all right about what happened, Hanna. But when we talk to each other honestly and stay close to each other, that helps us stay strong. It helps us understand if there’s danger around, and what to do about it.”
Hanna stopped a second a listened to Tracy, while Ashley ran her hands through her hair.
“Hanna has a reason to be terrified,” Ashley spoke up, “and the guards in the hallway are making it worse. They don’t let us forget what happened.”
Kaylna stood up from her seat then. “Whatever has to happen, happens,” she uttered and then sat down once again, smiling oddly.
Ashley put her hands over her ears while Kaylna spoke, but strangely enough the rest of the group calmed down and listened.
“Kaylna’s a functional schizophrenic,” Avery whispered to Tracy. “Oddly, the patients like listening to her. For some bizarre reason, she has a soothing effect.”
“All right, it’s enough. Let’s get going,” Enid, broke into the discussion, restless. “Why not tell the group who you are, Tracy, and what you’re doing here today? We’re all sitting here wondering. Enough of the mystery.”
“I know who she is,” said Kaylna. “Tracy is a friend of Ashley’s. She’s here to rescue her.”
Tracy wondered if Ashley had said that to Kaylna.
“I am a friend of everybody’s.” Tracy stood up from her seat. “I am a psychologist who works for law enforcement. I am here to find out exactly what happened to Maggie and Deidre.”
“I told you not to grill them,” Dr. Jarnow uttered loudly.
“I’m not grilling anyone,” Tracy shot back. “If anyone wants to speak about how they feel and about what happened, or what they think, I would be so grateful to hear it.”
“Maggie killed herself,” Virginia shouted.
“Why?” Tracy practically shouted back.
“Why not?” asked Virginia. “What does anyone here have to live for?”
Enid stood up. “Ridiculous, Virginia. You know better than that. You’ve learned a lot of things here. You’ve learned to stop stealing.”
Virginia paid no attention to Enid at all. “Maggie pretended to be happy, but she wasn’t. I heard her crying herself to sleep night after night,” she said.
“Maggie had everything to live for,” Ashley spoke up then. “She had a boyfriend, she was going home soon. She had a beautiful home to go to and parents who wanted her.”
“But it wasn’t a real home,” Hanna said loudly. “She didn’t want to go there.”
“You have an answer for everything, don’t you, Hanna?” Ashley looked over at her. “Whatever I say you say the opposite.”
“I’ll say what I want,” Hanna insisted. “And Maggie’s boyfriend, Sam, is stupid,” she added for good measure.
Everyone laughed lightly at that.
“How is Sam stupid?” Tracy was quick on the draw.
“Nobody wants him for a boyfriend,” Virginia added.
“Maggie did, though, didn’t she?” asked Tracy.
“Just because it made her feel better than everyone else,” Ashley commented lightly. “But once she left Ashton, it would mean nothing. Maggie would never see him again.”
“How do you know that?” asked Enid, irritated.
Kaylna suddenly stood up again. “Nothing is clear to others. Only to me, as clear as daylight.” Then she grinned at Tracy.
“What’s clear as daylight, Kaylna?” Tracy took her up on it.
Kaylna began unwinding the orange scarf from her neck then, much, much too slowly.
“It’s clear that it was Maggie’s time to die. And one month ago it was Deidre’s. What’s so bad about that? What’s so wrong? Dying can be beautiful. It can be peaceful, a relief.”
Tracy shivered as Enid stood up and interrupted.
“We cannot allow Kaylna to take over the discussion,” Enid insisted. “Kaylna has a habit of overpowering the conversation, every single time. Right now we’re discussing Maggie’s boyfriend Sam. Let’s continue with that.”
“I’m interested in what Kaylna has to say,” said Tracy.
“Whatever Kaylna says is a trap.” Enid’s voice grew darker. “It’s not good for the patients to listen to her. She’s encouraging them all to take their lives.”
“I’m doing no such thing.” Kaylna’s eyes flashed at Enid.
“Let Kaylna talk, if Tracy wants it,” Ashley insisted.
“Sit down, Ashley.” Enid was on the warpath now.
“I won’t sit down,” Ashley shot back. “This is our time to speak out. Let Tracy see what I’m up against, not only from Kaylna, but also from you. Do you see, Tracy?”
“All right, enough, enough.” Dr. Jarnow took over. “I want order immediately.”
“Order, order,” Marcy echoed as if she were singing the refrain of an old, forgotten song.
Tracy stood up then, took charge, and addressed the gathering of forlorn young women.
“Please tell me how I can help you?” she asked. “What do you need to feel better?”
A strange silence descended over everyone.
“We’ll never feel better,” Marcy moaned.
“Tell me why you think Deidre and Maggie are no longer with us,” Tracy continued.
Virginia stood up boldly. “Because both of them wanted to go,” she repeated.
“Was anyone involved with their deaths, anyone that you know of?” Tracy couldn’t help ask.
Dr. Jarnow jumped in. “Inappropriate question,” he fumed.
“It will help the patients to say what they truly feel,” Tracy insisted.
Enid stood up fiercely. “Check the visitors’ log,” she responded. “I believe Deidre and Maggie had the same strange visitor who came over and over again. Nobody thought much of it, but I noticed.”
“What kind of strange visitor?” asked Ashley. “I never heard or saw anything like that.”
Enid turned to Ashley cuttingly. “It doesn’t matter whether or not you heard about it. Believe it or not, there are events taking place at Ashton that you have no knowledge of at all.”
“Not too many,” said Ashley, suddenly smiling sweetly at Enid.
Tracy was disturbed by Enid’s comment. Deidre’s father had made the same claim.
“What kind of visitor did Maggie and Deidre have?” Tracy demanded.
“Investigate and see for yourself,” said Enid before she unexpectedly walked out of the room.
Unnerved by Enid’s swift departure, Tracy turned back to the group. Kaylna was sitting there laughing to herself.
“What’s funny, Kaylna?” asked Tracy.
“Everything’s funny, isn’t it?” Kaylna replied.
“The loss of life is funny?” Tracy zeroed in.
“Enid is sending you on a wild goose chase looking for a visitor,” Kaylna replied. “I’m laughing at how easy it is for you to be taken in. I thought you were a top criminal profiler.” Then she started laughing again.
Despite herself, Tracy felt hurt. Kaylna had a sense of tremendous superiority and invulnerability about her. It was as if whatever she said was written in stone.
“Don’t look for a visitor,” Kaylna continued. “Just keep looking right in front of you. Everything’s here in front of your eyes.”
Once again Tracy shivered. Was Kaylna admitting to being the culprit? Was she pointing to herself?