My mother was a Sunday school teacher. I lost count of the number of lessons she taught me by the time I was twenty years old. At fifty-seven, if I tried to recall them all it would be another book. One of the things she would always say to me was, “God blesses you to become a blesser.” Spiritually, I understood that, but let’s take it out of the spiritual realm. I want to show you why being a blessing to someone else is one of the most important principles of success.
One of the things I discovered early on is that the more people you help become successful, the more successful you become. When you share your blessings with someone else, you are fulfilling your purpose in this world as a human being. We are all here to help one another. When you receive a measure of success, on whatever level it is, it’s your obligation to teach that or share that with someone else. What I have seen with very successful people is that the more they give, the more God puts them in position to continue to give more. This is a principle that escapes far too many people. It is not enough to have a big house on a hill and not show anyone else how to get a big house on the hill. Then you’re up there by yourself and that’s no fun.
From the time we were children we had to learn this lesson: You can’t play hopscotch by yourself. You can’t jump rope by yourself. You can’t play hide-and-go-seek by yourself. All the games we played as kids were more fun when shared with others. It’s always better when you share the experience with someone else. Don’t lose the concept that you learned in childhood now that you are an adult and want to get into the money aspect of your life. Don’t lose that simple principle of sharing. Don’t stop playing together now.
I love the game of golf, but you can’t learn how to play golf and then go out and play it by yourself every day. Golf is a great game where you get to enjoy camaraderie, engage in competition, spend time with family and friends, and enjoy some of the most beautifully landscaped places that you will ever see. That’s what makes golf amazing to me. It’s better on the course with somebody else in my cart. I can turn to one of my buddies and ask him to take a picture of me. It is important that you share your success and enjoyment with someone in your life. What good is it to see beautiful scenery if there’s no one to see it with you? Every great moment in life is better when shared.
When I receive an award and my wife is sitting in the audience, it’s so much better because she is there to witness it. When I got my star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the best part was that my children were able to share that moment with me. The blessing, too, was that my friends and colleagues were there to celebrate the moment with me. Dr. Phil spoke a few words of congratulations, Ellen gave a speech that was filled with kind words, and Cedric and the entire cast from The Steve Harvey Show were there. I got to share this grand moment in my life with the people who matter the most to me.
When you understand that God blesses you to become a blesser, it can open up your life and transform it. The more our creator trusts us, the more He can trust us with.
When I give to someone less fortunate, as much as it can change their life, it actually does even more for me. When I send a child to school who otherwise couldn’t afford to go, God will now put me in a position to receive more resources to send ten more kids to school. Some of you might ask, “Steve, why are you taking your money and sending kids to school?” I would ask you this: “Why do I keep getting the money to send all these kids to school?” When you understand that God blesses you to become a blesser, you will realize that giving back will become an important part of your success.
I don’t know if you have noticed, but when rich people get together, they support each other’s causes with checks—big checks. The less fortunate may not be able to do that. They sometimes don’t support each other’s causes on any level, even when they could share in ways that don’t involve money. Rich people do because they get it. They view sharing as a fundamental obligation.
What do you think the Met Gala ball is about? All the media shows is the fashion, but the Met Gala is really an event that allows people to give money to a worthy cause, in this case the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York. It makes people feel good to give back. In big business this principle is called ROI, or return on investment. Successful people understand that giving back ultimately improves their bottom line. Successful people are conditioned to give. When you understand how powerful giving is, you will have more to give.
You don’t have to be rich to comprehend this principle. You can start on a smaller level. You can give time at the local food bank. You can spend time helping your aging father with errands. You can volunteer your time at a college fair.
My mother also taught me, “To whom much is given, much will be required.” The requirements are great to those who have been given a lot. As you climb higher, you are going to have to become more of everything. The more you get, the more will be required of you. You have to take more meetings, become more articulate, and be a better manager of time. I don’t like reading teleprompters, but now that I am on television, I had to get used to them. I tape too many shows, too many sets, and talk to too many people to remember everything. So I had to learn how to read teleprompters. To whom much is given, much will be required. I had to become more efficient and more proficient.
If you don’t adhere to the requirement part, then the giving part stops. Let me be as frank with you as I possibly can: I don’t mind taking the time to write this book and compile this information because I realize how blessed I am to be able to do this. I have been beaten up in the process of learning this information. I have taken a lot of hard knocks while learning this information, but it doesn’t prevent me from taking the time out of a very busy schedule—as a full-time radio host, a full-time television host, a full-time game show host, a full-time husband, a full-time father, a full-time businessman, and with a full-time touring schedule—to stop and write a book that I hope will benefit others. I have an obligation at this point in my life to educate people and to give them the tools that will help them become more successful. It’s now an obligation.
There is no need to get mad at the pastor who has a collection plate circulating when you are sitting there benefiting from the Word and his message. You can’t get mad at the bank for making money off your money, because the bank is holding it for you. You can’t get mad at the CEO of the United Way because of the large check he gets. He is helping hundreds of millions of people. You can’t get mad at the process. Instead, learn from the example. Become one of those people who are willing to share, educate, gift, help, inspire, lead, and push. Afterward, watch to see what comes your way.
People think that the more money you get and hang on to, the more you will have. In the short view that is true. But eventually the calling is going to come because to whom much is given, much will be required. If you make the money and try to hang on to all of it, God can no longer trust you with the requirement side, so the giving ceases. Just ask anybody who’s ever had it all and then lost it. If they are honest with you, they’ll attest to this principle.
Success is not just about your ability to achieve, but also your ability to serve through sharing. True success lives in our legacies. If you are able to serve as a model for the next generation, those who grow to greater levels will be as much your legacy as your own accomplishments.
Another key to true success is thankfulness and gratitude. These emotions are demonstrated by sharing with others. Your success shouldn’t only be for you; it should also be a blessing for others. I’m talking about really getting to the core of what fuels your gift, what’s going to sustain your gift when there are more days in a month than money in your bank account, and what it takes to stand confidently in your vision against all the odds.
By now, you know that your gift is that thing that you do and can do better than nearly anyone else. God isn’t going to just open up a door of opportunity for you to use your gift if you’re not doing your part to use and share your gift whenever you can. Matthew 25:23 says, “Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.” When you master the “few” you get the “many.” When you really love your craft, you don’t mind doing it for free or taking the time to mentor someone coming up in the ranks behind you.
You have acknowledged your gift. As you begin to walk in your gift, SUCCESS will begin to follow you wherever you go. Pay it forward.