Kali rode with us, lounging majestically in the backseat while Julia and I continued to bicker in the front.
“I just feel responsible,” Julia said.
“You’re not. Rexton’s gotta Rexton.”
“I really don’t need you to play knight in shining armor.
“How about just ‘good boyfriend,’ then?”
“I can handle him.”
“He weighs at least fourteen stone more than you. If he gets coercive or violent, you’re going to have a big fucking problem.”
We arrived at Rexton’s flat, and Julia let herself in with a spare key. Of course he’d given her a spare key. We found him slumped in his armchair in the living room. The place had an overwhelming stench of musk, stale booze, and spent cigarettes.
Behind me, I could feel Kali watching in anticipation. I didn’t turn around to look at her.
“George? I just wanted to check on you. I saw your blog post.”
“I hoped you’d come,” he said, and got up to walk towards us. Then he saw me for the first time. “Who the hell is this?”
“I’m Ravi, from editorial. I’m here to tell you that we understand the situation. It’s not your fault, and we can work something out with your novel. If you have any notes or handwritten drafts, we can help get them typed up—”
“They had to send a Paki to reassure me now?” he muttered.
He loomed over us, the darkness he was radiating was almost smothering. Anything could kick off now.
“Would, would you like me to wank you off?” Julia asked.
“Julia?! What is this? Are you suffering from some kind of Stockholm syndrome with this prick?”
“I don’t feel we should leave him like this,” she said.
“I want to fuck you,” he muttered. “This would never have happened if you’d agreed to fuck at the beginning. The stars were aligned. That was supposed to happen. Now it’s come to this. I’m buggered.”
“Christ!” I cried. “Not that again! This is the most solipsistic, irrational bollocks I’ve ever heard!”
I was losing it, and I didn’t care. I didn’t care that the gods were watching, I didn’t care that I was breaking Roger’s Golden Rule: Don’t make it personal, don’t insert yourself into the case.
“It’s none of your business,” Rexton said. “This is between her and me.”
“It is absolutely my business, arsehole! I’m her boyfriend!”
“You? I should have known. You lot, you come over here, take our jobs, sleep with our women—”
I’d stopped thinking at that point, I just reacted, reared back, and punched him straight in the face with all my weight behind it. I felt the crack! of his jaw against my fist, and he flew across the room, a lot farther than I expected. Ken and Clive were excellent boxing instructors, after all. Time slowed as Julia and I watched Rexton flip arse-over-tit across his table and crash through his TV set, landing on the carpet with his head through the screen.
Now I knew why Kali had showed up. She had known this was coming and just had to witness it.
Rexton lay there like a beached whale.
“Oh, dear,” Julia said.
Kali filmed all this on her phone.